Emma pushes open the door to the Mayoral Office quite happily the next morning. She isn't entirely sure why she is so insistent on entering the dragon's lair, she just is. And for Emma that is enough incentive to not question or psychoanalyze her actions any further. She is not, however, expecting to see her favourite Madame Mayor looking quite so dishevelled on a Wednesday morning.
"Did you find him?" the brunette exclaims, jumping out of her seat so suddenly Emma ponders of the possibility of a hidden ejector button- one that her presence has just triggered.
"Sorry, what?" Emma knits her eyebrows together, forming a soft line of confusion marring her brow.
"Henry! Did you find him?"
"Oh right. Yeah, I did."
Regina's face begins to contort in to lightly simmering rage and Emma is confused for the umpteenth time since her encounter with the brunette. "I couldn't sleep! I was up all night worrying and you didn't even think to tell me!" Emma frightens herself watching the older woman's lip tremble in anger, the vein in her forehead pulsing as if the little stream of blue had just run a marathon.
"I don't know- I'm sorry- I just..." she inhales, "I didn't think you would care that much."
"You come bursting in to my office to tell me that your son is missing and you don't think I'd care?"
Emma says nothing. Blinking appears to be the only function that works right now (that and shaky breathing).
"I know everyone thinks that I'm a heartless witch but I'm not. Not really." And Regina's voice is smaller than Emma has ever witnessed. It's a perverted privilege to hear the powerful woman reduced to fragility yet it's simultaneously horrible. And Emma wants nothing more than to comfort her.
She says her next words with an intensity that she can only pray stabilises Regina, "I don't. I never have, Regina, and I never will." Surprisingly, she finds that she means those words.
Brown pools widen momentarily before Regina's posture straightens and her regal mask slips over her weakness once more. "Where did you find him?"
Emma's cheeks are tinted pink, "Erm… the library."
"Oh," Regina chuckles slightly, unsurprised, "Yes, he does love reading doesn't he?"
"Clearly," Emma smiles, relaxing immediately at Regina's quick giggle, "Though I didn't know he loved it enough to get locked in there!"
Regina rolls her eyes. "I had hoped Henry hadn't inherited your idiocy although it seems that in this case genetics can prevail."
Emma isn't offended, instead she laughs- a meaty guffaw that startles Regina (and Emma for that matter) yet sits merrily atop of both woman's ears. And there is something so contagious in laughter that Regina finds herself humming to the sound of Emma as well. It's messy, disjointed and entirely alien to the pair but somehow just works, and Emma leaves the office, with a pile of paperwork, much happier than she has been in weeks.
…
Unlike the Mayor, the Sheriff had not been so eager to participate in the Book Swap. It was only after Mary Margaret unfairly brought out the 'Do it for Henry' card that she acquiesced.
"Come on Emma. Henry loves reading."
"Henry's a nerd," the blonde mumbled, her spoon diving in to a healthy chunk of Ben and Jerry's Fish Food.
Her best friend playfully scolded her, "Emma you can't say that!" and hit Emma with a newspaper.
"Yes I can, I'm his mother," Emma retaliated by smacking Mary Margaret on the head with her spoon.
"OW! And that is precisely why you should."
And so it was decided that Emma would take one of the very few books she had read when she was younger to the book shelf early the next morning. Her most beloved copy of "Alice In Wonderland" was tucked under the crook of her elbow as she stopped off at the library before her morning shift. It was in terrible condition, one that she had since she was fourteen- years- old and had travelled with her from care to home to care home all the way to her real home, but she didn't care. The book was a projection of herself and, as reluctant as she was to part with it, Mary Margaret ensured her that it would lead to greater things, ie a tighter community (cue a scoff from Emma).
Belle smiled at her as she slipped the book in the shelf. "Pick carefully, Emma."
The blonde nodded yet couldn't quite understand the significance of picking a book; hence why she did the complete opposite and randomly attacked the spine of an incredibly boring looking novel, "Little Woman", and left the library just as the Mayor was walking in.
Now the novel sits next to the insurmountable mountain of paper work, teasing her. Telling herself it is procrastination, Emma sighs and grabs the thick rectangular object and, thumping her legs upon the table top, settles down in to the chair to start reading.
"Christmas won't be Christmas without any presents," grumbled Jo, lying on the rug.
"It's so dreadful to be poor!" sighed Meg, looking down at her old dress.
Three pages in has Emma internally screaming at the characters to get off their asses and do something and she is more than ready to give up and confirm that the book is just as (if not more) boring than she had initially thought. It is then she notices the slight pencil markings on the left hand page, tiny, almost non-existent yet there in startling tangibility once you gauge its presence. Little stars littered the page, a smattering of the reader's own galaxy, increasing in size as they neared the first line. Emma squints and traces the trail of star dust with her index finger wondering who on earth would doodle so intricately on a beloved book.
She turns the novel over in her hand and marvels at the soft ripples in the paper, dampened by something that is too light to be water… perhaps tears? The book is old, no doubt. Very old. The corners of the pages are creased in use and crinkle lines betray age like the rings of a tree stump, yet it's clear that the owner has taken great care of it for many years. Emma begins to fabricate an image in her head of the potential reader. At first she envisages a crumbling old granny, wrinkles like deep crevices in a parched desert- an emulation of the book itself… yet soon her mind takes a different turn and a woman takes her place, tainted by a heartbroken past.
And Emma soon finds that she likes this story much better.
…
Regina is shocked, to say the least, to find the town's Sheriff fingering over the spines of the novels on the shelf. She watches her for a while, intrigued by the blonde's sudden interest in literature before clearing her throat and smiling at the little yelp Emma makes in surprise.
"Are my eyes deceiving me or is the Sheriff actually debating whether to read a book or not?" she says slyly, words dripping in venomous sarcasm.
Emma buries her hands in to the back pocket of her jeans and rocks nervously, "I'm trying to get in to it- for Henry."
"Are you sure the children's section isn't more suited to you?"
"Ha Ha very funny," Emma quips back, rolling her eyes at how easily they both fall back in to banter. "Although… I do actually like reading children's stories, especially the classics. There's something real about them even though they're all about made up places."
Regina blinks. "Yes, I agree completely."
Emma smiles at her shyly, "Anyway, I'll be off. I've picked up my new book and submitted another one. I'll see you around Regina- I mean, Madame Mayor."
Regina doesn't look in time to catch a glimpse of the title; instead she is too busy staring at the copy of "Alice In Wonderland" in her grip.
"Surprising to find Emma here, huh?" Belle asks sweetly, grinning as if she knew a secret.
"Yes," Regina muses, scanning shelves to search for another one of Henry's novels. She notices that her own copy of "Little Women" is back on the shelf. Pulling it out, she traces her thumb over the cover, relieved to have her oldest favourite back in her grasp.
"Someone returned that this morning," Belle giggles and Regina pivots to stun her with an unamused glare.
"Miss French, what is so funny?"
"Oh, nothing," she says flippantly, blatantly lying through her teeth. "Mr Gold said that he'd take me out later. I guess I'm just happy."
Regina grimaces at the mention of that slimy man's name. "I will never know what you see in that insufferable imp."
Her statement only widens Belle's grin, "Sometimes the universe ties us to people we least expect."
Eyes glittering, and the ghost of a chuckle still gracing her lips, the petite woman practically skips off in to the library's depths- no doubt to drown herself in the mundane task of ordering the novels alphabetically. Regina turns back to the bookshelf and skims over the titles before adding "The Wizard of Oz" on top of her own copy of "Little Women." Confident that once again a tiny "Swan" graces the inside cover, Regina slips in another one of her favourite classics and disappears out the library with a thirst for both kinds of stories.
She slides in to her favourite seat at Granny's (at its busiest obviously) to have her afternoon coffee and observe- spy- on every Storybrooker flirting, or arguing or gossiping over full cups and a plate of fries. If she allows herself to, she can potentially feel quite lonely. But she doesn't. She doesn't need people. People let her down; people break the walls she has worked so hard to build. She is a closed book and she intends to keep it that way.
She sighs and takes a long sip of her hot cup, inhaling the steam, allowing it to warm everything. She pushes open the cover of her much loved "Little Women" novel and begins to leaf through the pages that kept her alive in times where she had lost the light. A little note flutters out. Regina's heart doesn't usually start to race but upon seeing the hand written scrawl, it most definitely does. She remembers all too well drawing those stars over page three and gasps when she reads the writing adorning the little scrap of paper:
I think your little galaxy is beautiful. Imagine being a part of that; a star amongst millions.
Regina has no idea who wrote the note. She has no idea why it makes her stop breathing for a little second. And, as she shakes the book over the table, she has no idea why she is so disappointed that no more fall out.
"Erm.. Miss Mills?"
The woman looks up and widens her eyes at the boy who is standing in front of her. His little striped scarf tight around his neck, large puffy coat that widens his size so much it is almost comical and outstretched mitten gesturing towards her mug makes her heart melt a little. She tells herself it's the warm coffee.
"Henry, hello. Please- just call me Regina."
"Oh okay… er… Regina?"
"Yes, Henry?"
"How much longer are you gonna be drinking that?"
"I don't know. Why on earth do you ask?"
"Because my Mom wants to talk to you- she's outside."
"Oh."
And her heart rate speeds up just a little bit once again.
…
Emma's hands begin to clamp up, despite the ridiculous chill engulfing Storybrooke. She has spent ages trying to figure out what she will say to Regina but the thought of actually saying it scares her hugely. She watches nervously as her ever-growing boy leads a very perplexed Mayor out of the diner.
"Miss Swan?"
"Hi, yes, that's me," Emma cringes at her awkwardness and doesn't dare peak a glance at Regina's unamused face. "I wanted to ask you- and don't feel like you have to say yes, it's not like that at all- I just felt bad and- "
"She wants to apologise for last night and was wondering whether you'd come out to drinks with her and the girls," Henry fills in for his bumbling mother.
Regina formulates the only thing she can in that second, "And who are the girls?"
"Ruby, Mary Margaret and Belle- she was desperate to come for some reason," Emma mumbles in to her scarf.
"I don't usually go out anywhere. I prefer to stay inside and do work."
"That's boring," Henry quips, grabbing on to the Mayor's hand as if to try and shake the woman out of her irritating work ethic.
Emma squeaks loudly and wills HeH
Henry to let go of her boss but the older woman seems oddly at peace with the physical touch, perhaps even happy.
"Okay," Regina says carefully, as if tasting the words on her tongue for the first time.
"Cool! Meet us at the Rabbit Hole at 8pm," the blonde grins, grabbing Henry and pretending she doesn't hear the gasp it elicits from Regina as his gloved hand slips out of hers.
Mother and son walk away from the diner in step, Emma a confliction of emotions. She messes up her son's hair with her free hand, earning an annoyed groan from the twelve year old. "We did good, kid. We got the scary Mayor to leave her house for a few hours."
"Yeah, it's pretty impressive Mom."
"You like her, don't you kid?"
"Who?"
"Regina. You like her don't you."
"Yeah course, don't you?"
Emma stops walking and chews over the concept in her brain. She has never explicitly been asked if she likes Regina.
"Yeah… I suppose I do."
"Good," Henry grins. They walk on in comfortable silence for several minutes before the boy speaks up again, "You know she had your book next to her in the diner."
"What?"
"Your book, "The Wizard of Oz". She must have taken it out of the Book Swap."
"Shit."
"Mom!"
"Sorry, kid. That's just- well that's just odd. And kind of bad."
Emma spends the majority of her evening worrying over Regina reading her book. She was a messed up kid for so long, no doubt her books bear the aftermath of that. Every page was often full of scribbles and notes and drawings and anything that a pencil could do to help her escape the awful reality. The thought of Regina reading that…
But why? Why on earth would Regina take out a children's book?
She has to get it back. She has to get back all of them. It is too hard. She isn't ready to open the book just yet. The scars of her past have been concealed for far too long; she was naïve to think it would be okay to reopen the wounds. To Regina no less!
But she can't just stop. She is far too intrigued by the woman with a broken heart, the one that fashions tiny galaxies to secrete away a pain that hurts too much to be deemed as mortal.
She can't leave, not when she's fallen so deep in to the story. And it's only book one.
A/N: Can I get a hi-five for that speedy update! I love writing this story ahhhh. I'm so sorry but I am unable to reply to any of your reviews at the moment. I do still get them by email so please do continue to review because it really does give me the motivation to get typing. I can't wait to start writing the next chapter so I imagine you will receive an update very soon.
