Someone asked (unsigned review) will this take much time. The answer is no, give me two weeks? Tops. Depending on boring real life stuff like my job.
I may be persuaded to move things along a bit though, who knows. :) Stay tuned!
He figured it out more quickly than she thought he would, but she wasn't really that surprised. He knew that she didn't want to be alone and he was, as always, ever the gentleman. He didn't ask questions, he didn't push, he simply offered her suggestions and let her decide how they'd spend their evening.
She knew he'd do anything she asked. He knew she wouldn't ask.
His acceptance of the change in her and his quick realisation of what it was came as no real surprise but his next action was nothing she would ever have expected. As the lift doors closed in front of them he turned towards her swiftly but smoothly. One of his hands came to rest against her hip, pushing gently and guiding her to turn to face him and she sucked in a quick breath, eyes going wide, at the sudden contact.
"Don't shoot me," He whispered as his other hand slid across her side, under her arm and around her back. As his arm wrapped around her, the hand against her hip glided around to join it. A small squeak of surprise escaped her lips without her permission as Castle pulled her against his chest in a warm, affectionate hug but she made no move to pull away or stop his progress.
Just what exactly the hell did he think he was doing?! He couldn't just hug her in the precinct elevator! Except he was and she was lodging absolutely no protest. In fact her arms came up, almost automatically, her hands lying with flat palms against his biceps as his arms linked loosely around her waist. Her head came to rest against one of his shoulders before she'd even realised it.
Time stretched and contracted and Beckett had no idea how long they stood together, Castle holding her, surrounding her and filling her with a strange kind of warmth she hadn't felt in a long, long time. She wasn't aware of anything except her writer and the steady beat of his heart under her ear until the elevator dinged to let them know they'd arrived at their destination and, as quickly as Castle had moved to her, he stepped away.
She missed his warmth instantly but was thankful for his discretion as he reached out once again to hold the doors back so she could step out into the lobby first. Still stunned Beckett tried to decide whether it had felt longer than the ride from the fourth floor or whether the time had passed in an instant. It felt like both at the same time and she was still struggling with the thought as her body moved on autopilot out of the elevator and across the lobby. Castle reached out silently and lay his hand against the small of her back, keeping pace beside her as they moved towards her Crown Vic. Castle dropped his hand and moved away from Beckett only once they reached the vehicle.
"Castle, I," Beckett started but stopped, unable to find words. She glanced at him across the top of the car, her hand stalling before she opened the passenger side door.
"I'm thinking mu shu beef," He offered. "And a whole pile of those little dumpling things." He said, nodding with finality as he opened his door. "We better get a double order if you want some too."
"Sure," Beckett smiled and nodded, studying the man before her for a second longer before he disappeared inside the car, settling himself behind the steering wheel.
The strong, kind, dedicated man she'd come to know and rely on; the man who had hugged her because he sensed she needed comfort without knowing really why; the man who wasn't going to mention it until she did; the man who was giving her an out, again, if she wanted to pretend it had never happened.
The man who would give her endless chances.
The man who loved her.
The man who she loved back without being able to tell him for reasons she wasn't even sure she understood anymore.
"And the crispy skinned chicken with those crunchy noodle things." Castle said as Beckett finally opened her door and slid into her seat.
"And special fried rice,"
"I like the way you think, Detective." Castle smiled. Beckett returned the smile, not dwelling on the almost foreign feeling of it - her lips stretching and being whetted by the tip of her tongue just visible between her teeth. She hadn't realised it had been so long since she'd smiled a full and genuine smile.
As soon as Beckett was inside the car with her door closed she settled back comfortably into the seat with a deep sigh. She let her eyes drop closed and stifled a yawn, confirming Castle's observation that she was truly tired. Something had been off about her all day, or for the last few days, he wasn't sure. Beckett had already been at the precinct engrossed in paperwork when he'd arrived with her coffee at seven that morning. They'd been there until almost midnight the night before and none of it was really out of the ordinary. There was an open case and all their leads were going cold, one by one.
There was something more than just being tired though. It was tired beyond tired. She was worn out, exhausted. There was a reason behind it and Castle found himself determined, in that moment, to find out just what was going on but not right now. He wanted to give her some space and some time to gather her thoughts and get out of work mode and so he remained silent during the drive back to his loft. He glanced at her in his peripheral vision occasionally but she hardly moved, didn't speak, didn't even open her eyes until he pulled the car to a stop at a set of traffic lights a few blocks from his building.
Beckett blinked quickly, rubbing one hand across her eyes and glancing out the windshield to reorient herself. "Doze off?" Castle asked, unsure what else to say.
"Must have," Beckett nodded, still trying to blink away the lingering fog of sleep. Castle opened his mouth again, almost unable to stand it any longer. "Castle," Beckett said, reaching out and placing a finger against his lips, cutting him off before he could speak. Castle's mouth snapped shut and he blinked several times before glancing across at Beckett, looking back to the road as the light turned green and Beckett withdrew her hand. "I know how hard it must have been for you to stay silent all this time, and I really appreciate it and I had no idea you could last this long but,"
"Why Detective Beckett," Castle interrupted, his voice dropping to a low, almost seductive tone as he glanced across at her again. "I would be more than happy to demonstrate for you just how long I can," He paused waggling his eyes brows suggestively towards the detective beside him. "Last," He said finally, dragging the vowel sound out.
"Castle," She sighed, slight amusement filtering into her tone as she rolled her eyes. "Thank you for giving me some space, and thank you for giving me a hug, and thank you for just generally being there and being quiet for once in your life, I do appreciate it. I do," She sighed again.
"But," Castle prompted.
"But I'm just," She paused, pulling her bottom lip in behind her teeth. "I need a little more time to sort through all this and figure out how to verbalise it." She said, handing him the victory of acknowledging that he had in fact figured out that something was going on. "I don't want to be misunderstood or end up tripping over my own words to try and tell you what I mean. Let's just eat dinner and relax first, like you said. Let me get my ducks in a row and you can knock 'em down one by one with all those questions slushing around inside your head, ok?"
"Slushing?" Castle asked, pulling the Crown Vic into a parking space and cutting the engine.
"Swirling? Twirling? I don't know Castle, you're the writer, not me. I can't promise that I'll answer all your questions but I promise I'll at least listen to them all."
"Ok," Castle smiled unbuckling his seatbelt and turning slightly towards Beckett. "Sort your duckies out and I'll," He hesitated for a second and Beckett knew exactly what was about to happen. He was about to deliver another line dripping with innuendo and she had set herself up for it. "Prepare my weapon for hunting season." He said, punctuating the statement with a wink.
"Oh, jeez," Beckett said pinching the bridge of her nose with one hand while she undid her seatbelt with the other. "Feed me, Castle," She said glancing across at him, not completely able to hide her smile, before exiting the vehicle. Castle was right behind her, his hand taking up position on the small of her back again as they made their way in silence to his loft.
Yep, made Castle say duckies. I'm aware of how bad the "prepare my weapon for hunting season" thing is, but I couldn't think of anything else - suggestions always welcome. Credit always given.
Hugs also accepted and returned.
