Finally, after several hours and various suspicious-sounding explosions, the various Akatsuki members found themselves situated inside of a large van and clinging to each other in fear as Itachi started up the vehicle.

"Leader-sama, remind me again why we're letting a blind person drive?" Kisame muttered from his seat next to Deidara.

"Because Itachi's the only who hasn't had his driver's licence revoked," Pein said, shrugging from his spot in between Tobi and the window.

"Uh huh... Wait, can blind people even HAVE driver's licences?"

"Sure they ca-... Wait. No. They can't."

"Why didn't you realize that before no-AAAAAAAAAARGH!!!!!!!!!!!" Kisame was cut off as the car jerked forwards– Itachi had slammed his foot onto the gas petal.

There was a deafening screech as the car sped down the road, going far past the speed limit.

"NO, JASHIN-SAMA, SAVE ME, I'M TOO PRETTY TO DIE!!" Hidan screamed, clutching his rosary.

"SHUT UP, HIDAN, UN! BESIDES, I'M WAY PRETTIER THAN YOU!!! I SHOULD BE THE ONE TO SURVIVE!!!!" Deidara screamed back, holding onto Mr. Satan-fluffers the stuffed bunny tightly.

"Both of you shut up. True art is eternal and everlasting. I have made myself into art, and therefore, should be the one to survive," Sasori snapped, looking back at the two of them.

"No, you're wrong, danna, un! True art lasts for but a splitting second and then goes out with a bang," Deidara declared proudly. "Besides, I'm far closer to true art than y–"

Sasori raised an eyebrow. "Just what are you implying, Deidara...?"

"What, un? I just said tha– Oh, shit. NONONONONOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! FORGET WHAT I SAID!!!!!! I DON' WANNA DIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Deidara bawled, panicking.

Itachi turned his head from side to side in confusion. "Why are we moving?"

"TAKE YOUR FOOT OFF THE GAS PEDAL!!!!!!!!!!" Pein yelled, trying to make himself heard over the ruckus.

"What? What gas pedal?" Itachi asked in confusion.

"THE ONE YOUR FOOT IS ON!!!!!!"

"Leader-sama, there is no gas pedal under my foot."

"Ugh... JUST LIFT YOUR FOOT UP!!!!!"

"NO!!!!!!!"

"WHY?!?!?!" Pein yelled in frustration.

"I'LL FLOAT AWAY, THAT'S WHY!!!!!!" Itachi yelled back.

"What the..." Pein's eyebrow twitched. "Madara-sama..." he muttered, turning to the masked man.

"Yes?"

"You drugged Itachi as well, didn't you?"

"Mayyyybeeee..." Tobi said shiftily.

"..."

"It was actually an accident."

"Oh? How so?"

"Well, Tobi thought his mug was Leader-sama's."

"Tobi..." Pein muttered in annoyance. "WHY were you trying to drug me?"

"Because..." he leaned in close to Pein's ear and whispered something.

"What was that, Tobi? I couldn't quite hear..."

"TOBI LIKES TO DO STUFF TO LEADER-SAMA!!!!!!!!" Tobi yelled, causing Pein to fall over in a dead faint.

All arguing ceased as everyone turned to look at the masked nin.

"What? What did Tobi say?"

"You...stay away from me...un," Deidara said in a shaky voice, holding Mr. Satan-fluffers in front of himself like a shield.

It was then they noticed that they had stopped moving. Apparently, Itachi, in his shock, had released his foot from the gas pedal.

They all got out of the car shakily. They were in a parking lot.

"Where are we, un?" Deidara asked, looking around.

"In a parking lot, dipshit."

"Shut up, Hidan, I KNOW that, un."

"Well then why the fuck would you ask?"

"We appear to be in New York City," Pein said calmly, getting out of the car. He had just regained consciousness several seconds ago.

Kisame looked at him skeptically. "Weren't we just in Japan a second ago?"

"Yes, Kisame. I meant the New York City in Tokyo."

"But, Leader-sama...New York City isn't IN Tokyo..."

"Shut up. I'm the leader, and if I say there's a New York City in Tokyo, then there's a New York City in Tokyo. Got it?" Pein asked dangerously.

"O-okay, Leader-sama..."

Suddenly, a woman walked up to them. "Excuse me miss, would you mind moving your vehicle? You're right in front of the parking lot entrance, and I'm afraid you're blocking traffi–"

"Miss?!" Deidara said angrily, cutting her off. "MISS?!?! JUST WHICH ONE OF US ARE YOU ADDRESSING, HM?!?!?!??!"

"But, I–"

"THERE ISN'T A SINGLE GIRL AMONG US!!!!!!! AND YOU WOULD DO BEST TO REMEMBER THAT, UN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The woman ran off, screaming about homicidal femmeboys.

Deidara felt a killer aura radiating from behind him. He turned around, scared. "K-Konan? Konan, I-I didn't mean it, un." He backed away slowly from the angry looking bluenette.

"So... "there isn't a single girl amoung us", huh, Deidara?" she asked darkly.

"U-uh... Look, Konan, I wasn't thinking, un... Really, I wasn't...un..." He faltered under Konan's menacing glare.

"Deidara?" she asked sweetly.

He gulped. "Yes, un?"

"Start running."

Which is why, when the Sand Siblings got out of their car and headed towards their pre-booked hotel for a long-awaited vacation, one of the first things they saw was a long-haired blonde criminal being chased by an angry looking woman with a paper flower in her blue hair.

They stared at the spectacle.

"Hey, Gaara..." Kankuro asked, looking at the two Akatsuki ninja in confusion. "Isn't that guy the same one who kidnapped you back in Suna?"

"You're right, he is," Gaara realized, looking on in amazement.

Temari pulled out a pair of mini-fans with the kanji for "blue" on them and started waving them around, cheering. "YAY! GO GET 'IM, BLUE!!!"

Kankuro turned to her. "Hey, can we have some of those?"

"Sure! Here."

"Thanks." Gaara and Kankuro took the fans and started cheering along with her. "GO, BLUE!!!!"

"I HATE YOU ALL, UN!!!!!" Deidara screamed as he ran back to the parking lot, Konan still on his tail.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////

AN: Hmm.... Well, that was fun! n-n Review if you want. (Seriously, I like getting reviews, but I don't live off them or anything...heh...)

Oh, and... About that thing with Pein... Um, I seriously think MadaPein is my OTP. Weird, I know...most random OTP ever. I blame the dog, because the cat will just deny it anyway.

Besides, perverted!Tobi is just weird enough to be funny...I think...O.O