(The prompt for this one: "I don't think the NFL had the slightest intention of taking me, except as maybe a water boy." It was asked of Joel McHale, in what I think was a reference to his college days as a football player for the Washington Huskies. Just guessin'.)

Everdeens Triumphant

It was a Monday night at Troy and Abed's apartment. At one corner, Troy and Britta sat together. He was ripping up a piece of paper, while Britta had a look of confusion on her face. In the opposite corner sat Abed and Shirley. His eyes darted around the room, looking at the other people in the group, while she had her arms folded over her chest, seething. Jeff and Annie, had their fists clenched, their eyes glued to the screen at the counter in the corner.

4…

3…

"They are going to be so obnoxious," said Shirley, scowling.

2…

1…

Jeff leapt up from his seat, screaming triumphantly. Annie joined him (with a higher pitched yelp), then slapped his hand for a high five.

"It's official," said Pierce, checking from his laptop. He'd declined the game, declaring to "too gay," but he had no problem being treasurer. "Primrose Everdeens," he said, addressing Jeff and Annie, "I will return with your trophy."

"Ha!" she said, pointing at Troy and Britta. "In your face, Butt Assassins!"

"I don't get it," said Britta, turning to Troy, "I thought you were good at football."

"Not fantasy football!" whined Troy. "That's math and stuff! If anyone was gonna win, I would've said it was the Bake Off Royals," referring to Abed and Shirley. "I thought Abed out of anyone would be good at crunching down numbers."

Abed shook his head. "Admittedly, I got a little thrown by the rules. Plus, I used up all of our draft picks on Pittsburgh Steelers players. They had two Super Bowl rings in recent years, so naturally I assumed that they would replicate their successes. Plus they were in the Dark Knight Rises."

"I told you not to pick Ben Rothelisberger," said Shirley. "That man's evil."

"So how did you two ever manage the good picks?" Britta asked.

"Um," said Annie, blushing a little, "I picked most of them."

"Yeah," said Jeff, clapping her around the shoulder, "she selected most of them based on adorability."

"You had an adorability index?!" Troy said, incredulously. "Why didn't I think of that."

"That explains why you had Tom Brady at QB," said Shirley, nodding, "that man's handsome. And Alfred Morris, I guess, but he's more cute than anything."

"No, we picked him because of the Redskins stellar run blocking scheme," Annie said, tripping over some of the words. She looked up at Jeff. "That's what it was called, right?"

"You know football?" Britta asked Jeff.

"I might have been a tight end in high school."

Britta rolled her eyes. Leave it to Jeff to brag about his butt.

Pierce returned, plopping down a Hello Kitty cookie jar in between Jeff and Annie. He unscrewed the lid. "Ladies and gentlemen," he said, "your Greendale Fantasy Football Champions: the Primrose Everdeens!"

Jeff and Annie both fished a cookie out of the jar, which they clinked as if they were flutes of champaign. Victory never tasted so sweet.