Natsu was thinking.

While it may not have been entirely accurate to say that the dragon slayer never usually thought, it was certainly rare of him to spend any amount of time on it. He had always much preferred to punch through his problems, to go for the ever popular 'Plan T' and Take Them Head On, but now the nemesis he was facing was his own confusion it was an entirely different kind of issue to tackle. In addition to this he knew that he couldn't even rely on his friends to do the thinking for him, knowing that he was reluctant to open up to any of them about exactly what he had seen within the Eclipse Gate. He had come to the conclusion that the last few images, the moment where he had killed his childhood self, had been nothing more than an incredibly confusing dream, but he still couldn't shake the idea that it still had some deeper meaning.

"So what do you think?" he asked, his legs crossed and looking up at the tiny master. He felt like a child in a classroom in front of the wise old man, his eyes wide and waiting for the knowledge to pour down and finally give him some of the clarity he craved. He'd been telling the master exactly what had been going around head for the past couple of days, every sound, sensation and smell from the world with Zeref, focussing on just how real it had seemed.

The master listened diligently, understanding that Natsu had not come to him easily. He had always been careful to make sure that every one of his beloved children had everything that they needed, but because of this his free time was not always something that he could easily donate to just one person. Natsu had been both lucky and careful to find him that evening, surprisingly sober for the late hour and still able to give some of his advice, if only he could think of how to proceed. "That is interesting indeed…" he commented gruffly, running his fingers through his moustache and feeling almost as perplexed as Natsu had.

Natsu leaned forwards, doing everything in his power to stay sitting and not bounce into action. "You see? I mean, I know it was just a dream and everything, but it felt really real! I just don't know what it could mean."

"And you say that after you had this vision, the Eclipse Gate broke down?" the master persisted.

Natsu nodded. If he was willing to trust his instincts, he would have known that his vision had caused the destruction of the Eclipse Gate and it had been his conscious decision to save his brother that day. It just seemed too unbelievable even for him. He looked down at Happy, realising that the small cat was curled into his side. This had been the first time that he had told his feline companion the story too, but neither dared to question just how ridiculous it sounded. For a moment he would have almost preferred if they'd both simply laughed and he could discount it as some huge joke.

"Hmmm…" the master hummed under his breath, continuing to scratch his moustache in contemplation. "I'm afraid that my knowledge on the Eclipse Gate and Zeref is limited, but one thing that I do know is this: the woman that you described, Anna Heartfillia, was definitely real."

Natsu's eyes went wide. Happy jumped up, curiosity driving the cat forwards. "Lucy's great-great-great-great-great-great-great-?" he asked, cut off before he could finish how many generations had passed.

Makarov nodded, frowning as he pulled on the information through his years of knowledge. "-Grandmother, yes," Makarov finished for the small cat. "Though most of her history is either forgotten or fantasy, Anna Heartfillia was a great Celestial Wizard who became obsessed with the idea of time travel. The legend says that she came closer than anyone in finally achieving her goal. But then the legend says that she was also slain by a giant red dragon."

"Igneel…" Natsu breathed.

"-Some four hundred years ago, Natsu," Makarov quickly reminded him.

"Oh."

Natsu frowned to himself, sitting back. It was impossible for him to hear the word 'dragon' without instantly thinking back to his father, without missing his presence and feeling the burning desire inside of him to rush back out into the world and scream his name until he finally found him. It couldn't have been coincidence, he decided, that the legend of Anna Heartfillia was combined with one of dragons, and it only sparked Natsu's interest further.

"Tell me, Natsu," Makarov began to speak again, his own curiosity growing as he looked up and down at the young man. He remembered vividly bringing him into the guild, the way that he had spoken of an impossible upbringing. He had been laughed at on that day, and even as he cast the fabled dragon slayer magic there had been those who had doubted his story even now. There was something completely unbelievable about all of Natsu and sometimes it was worth remembering that things could not be so easily explained. "Do you remember any more of your childhood yet?"

Natsu frowned deeply, gripping his ankles as he rolled his eyes. "Of course I remember it all. I remember Igneel, I remember his lessons…"

Makarov cut him off with a shake of his head. "I don't mean of the dragon, of caves and mountains and unchanging things. I mean cities, people, villages, festivals…" he coaxed gently.

Natsu grimaced. "Igneel was a dragon. We didn't really need to talk to people…" he admitted, knowing that the master already knew this. When he had first come into the guild he had struggled with some of the most basic things. Though Igneel had been a wonderful teacher there were certain behaviours that could not simply be taught, and even now he found himself shouting instead of speaking in tone with everyone else. "What's that got to do with the dream?!"

The Master wasn't certain. "Just a hunch," he said, knowing that it was worth at least considering that perhaps it hadn't been a dream. Even Natsu had claimed that it had felt real and the old man had never seen the boy so worked up before. "Why didn't you speak to your friends about this?" he asked, glancing to Happy and seeing his reactions as he heard everything.

Natsu looked away, unable to even meet Happy's eyes as he spoke. "They wouldn't believe me," he huffed.

"That's not true, Natsu!" Happy chimed up, putting a tiny paw on his knee. "You know I'd always believe you!"

"Not you, Happy," he said, affectionately putting his hand on his head and brushing back his ears.

"Happy is right," Makarov had to agree with a nod. "Your nakama trust you. I don't think any of them would have questioned this."

Natsu wanted them to question it. He didn't want to believe it at all, didn't want to have to process exactly how he felt about any of this. He felt as if a piece of his history had been placed before him but it was dark and ugly and he wanted nothing more than to simply hand it back. He didn't want to handle this change. He gave a heavy sigh, still refusing to look at either the master or Happy. "Because if it was real… Or a little bit real… I destroyed the Eclipse Gate. And I know that I did it to save Fairy Tail, and I know that it was the right thing to do, but I don't think Erza and Gray would be OK with that…" he said slowly, finally after all of these years understanding the way that his friends had been mended from broken childhoods, knowing just how much darkness had shaped them over the years.

It had been exactly as the master had expected but it pleased him to hear the confirmation that Natsu had been as thoughtful as he had suspected. Though he didn't agree with him keeping the secret from his nakama he could at least respect that Natsu had grown enough to respect his friend's and their losses. "That's probably for the best," he had to admit awkwardly. "Gray and Erza have faced more hardship from Zeref and his worshipers than most, but they are not alone. There may be others less understanding than your friends. Even if it was a dream, we best keep this between us for now."

"Don't worry, Natsu, I won't tell anyone," Happy smiled back at him.

Natsu grinned back at Happy, knowing that he at least had him no matter what else could come and go. No matter how confusing the world became he would always have his feline friend by his side. "Thanks, Happy," he told him, looking up at the master and wishing he could pull more answers from his wisdom but seeing already that he seemed as blind as he was. That didn't mean that he hadn't gained some valuable knowledge, and now he knew that he was not alone. "It's just a stupid dream, I know. I mean, if it was real I'd be dead, or I wouldn't exist right now, wouldn't I?" he said with his head slightly tilted to one side, thinking that he could somehow pull out a more plausible explanation than that if only he had the brain capacity. "Or really really old. That was four hundred years ago. And I'm not immortal, either, because I keep growing," he said, internally flinching a little at just the thought of immortality and the curse that followed.

It had been another reason he had asked for the master's counsel; Ankhesram and the destructive dark power that had consumed his body clawed through his thoughts. The image of Lucy's face draining of all colour haunted his dreams, burned into the back of his eyelids even if he closed his eyes for just a second. He needed just a little more assurance that the deadly power would not make its way back into this world, that the curse could never hurt another soul again. With that he gripped his fists tighter. He had made a promise to himself and to Zeref that one day he would destroy him, and with him he would be destroying every last piece of Ankhesram. "I'm going to destroy him, gramps. I'm going to defeat Zeref," he decided.

For a second Makarov fully believed him. He had the heated determination that he was used to seeing in his brats, the wild look in his eyes that told him he would stop at nothing before he achieved his goal. But he shook his head. "People have dedicated their entire lives to destroying Zeref before…" he reminded him gently. "And you have no way of finding him." It wasn't that he didn't want Zeref to be destroyed, nor that he wanted Natsu to do so, but he had seen far too many innocent men and woman stumble off the right path on their eternal struggle to find Zeref. For some reason the road to finding Zeref was one laced with corruption and darkness and all too often the goodness of their hearts faltered and the numbers of the dark guilds grew and grew.

"I don't care," Natsu said, rising back to his feet with the flames twisting around his fists. "I'm going to find him, no matter what anyone says. He's hurt my friends, and he's pissed me off, and I need answers. He has to know something about Igneel," he decided, not because it particular made sense but just because he desperately wanted it to. "One of those dark guilds has to know something."

"Natsu," Makarov growled, a dangerous gleam in his eyes that matched Natsu's determination, knowing that they both fought with a protective power. "You know there are rules against inter-guild conflicts."

"Who gives a shit about the rules?!" Natsu yelled out.

"Clearly not you…" Happy happily interjected.

Natsu gritted his teeth, continuing his rampaging desires. "He is one guy, someone has to know where the hell he is. We found him and we weren't even looking for him!" he exclaimed. "I'm so sick of those dark guild bastards attacking us and we have to hold back and do nothing! We got our chance now, right now, to finally take an advantage and get them before they get us!" he said. He remembered Fairy Tail's frustrations in the other world, the way that they had always felt one step behind the enemy. No matter which way around the darkness and light fell, his beloved guild always seemed to be too slow and pushed to the defensive, when all he wanted to do in that moment was scream and punch something and finally make some sense of the twisted world in front of him.

Makarov stood on the top of his stool, knowing that if he wanted to he could make himself as big as the entire room. Intimidation was not something that worked easily on the dragon slayer, but he could at least demand some respect. "We will not pull this guild into a war!" he yelled at him, knowing that Natsu had seen exactly what price could be paid for this costly mistake. "You will not attack another guild, dark or official or independent, not until you find yourself in a life or death situation. I will not let you put the rest of these brats in danger."

Natsu shook in anger. He kept his mouth shut, trusting the guild master too much to question his judgement but feeling truly and deeply hurt that he could even begin to think Natsu would bring any harm to his nakama. He was a destructive force, he was unpredictable and wild, but never never would he have allowed anyone to be hurt because of his actions. The fires around his fists died down. "I hear you, old man," he said, already turning the words over and over and trying to find the best loophole that he could.


I feel like its been forever since I last posted... really? Only 4 days? Well that just goes to show what a binge poster I was before, doesn't it? I'm not sure how quickly the next ones will be up as I literally only have one more chapter written, and two other stories being written at once, but I'm aiming for one a week.

But oh my god the new manga! Wah!

Anyway, reviews are loved always :) I try to reply to all I can - Guest, thanks for your kind words! I still have a lot of brainstorming with Ultear so I guess we'll both find out haha!

Shout-out to Zunifex and BlueFlaw to replying to way too many of my PMs and constantly giving me reviews :)