You Matter to Me - A songfic for the song You Matter to Me from the musical Waitress
Headcanons the oneshot is based on:
- Basically just all of the Ninja's insecurities
QUICK NOTE EXPLAINING HOW THIS WAS MADE:
I don't use any names, but I am a huuuuge fan of anaphora / parallelism / repetition so it starts with a line from the song then one of the ninja. It's in a series of four different starts. The first is Jay, then Kai, then Cole, Lloyd, Zane, then ends all together.
I hope this makes sense and isn't super confusing! Enjoy!
I could find the whole meaning of life in those sad eyes…
He was talkative, annoying. He knew this, yet he couldn't get himself to shut up. He knew nobody cared. He was very aware.
They've seen things you never quite say but I hear
He was rude, rash. His emotions clouded his rational judgment and he made mistakes, fatal ones. Mistakes that didn't hurt him, but those he cared about.
Come out of hiding I'm right here beside you and I'll stay there as long as you'll let me
He was a screw up, a failure. He tried, oh how hard he tried. It never mattered though. He failed at making people proud, failed at making the right decisions.
Because you matter to me, simple and plain and not much to ask from somebody
He was pained, damaged. His whole life was stolen from him. His day filled with regret and his sleep disturbed by monsters. He didn't want to do this anymore.
You matter to me, I promise you do, you, you matter too, I promise you do, you'll see… you matter to me...
He was weird, different. He couldn't connect with people the way he wished he could. He often felt like an outsider, often wondered why he kept going.
It's addicting the minute you let yourself think, the things that I say just might matter to someone…
Sometimes he would give up, stop speaking altogether. He would sit quietly, hoping someone would ignite a conversation with him. Other times he would talk loudly. Too loud. "You have to talk loudly to be heard," is what he would tell himself to justify the action.
All of this time I've been keeping my mind on the running away
Sometimes he would bottle up his anger, his unnatural anger, his fatal flaw. He would hide it, let it fester until he couldn't contain it. He would scream, kick holes in walls, break something of value. He would get snippy, unleash a beast on the innocent bystanders. Unleash his inner beast.
And for the first time, I think I'd consider this stay…
Sometimes he would get no sleep. He would lay in his bed, staring into the darkness, his brain constantly in motion, degrading thoughts keeping him from the bliss of oblivion. He would worry, often times tears would fill his eyes and they would sting his eyes almost as if they were his thoughts falling down his face.
Because you matter to me, simple and plain and not much to ask from somebody
Sometimes he would wish he could run away. He wished he could forget about everything, himself included. His past, his present, even his future, were things he desperately wanted to erase.
You matter to me, I promise you do, you, you matter too, I promise you do, you'll see… you matter to me…
Sometimes he would strive not to act like himself. He would go out of his way to act differently around his peers, speak differently, adapt to their lifestyle. He tried so hard to fit in, too hard. It was exhausting. It was wrong. It wasn't him.
Dear baby, I hope someday someone wants to hold you for twenty minutes straight
He tried to stay positive, optimistic. It was draining.
They don't pull away, they don't look at your face, and they don't try to kiss you
He tried to stay calm, collected. It was difficult.
All they do is wrap you up in their arms and hold on tight without an ounce of selfishness to it
He tried to stay strong, unbreakable. It was tiring.
I hope you become addicted, baby
He tried to keep going, keep pushing through. It wasn't enough.
I hope you become addicted to saying things, and having them matter to someone
He tried to be brave, himself. It was miserable.
You matter to me, simple and plain and not much to ask from somebody
But the others thought of him as a comfort. A light in times of darkness, someone to turn to when they needed to smile. He was the best friend any of them could ask for.
I promise you do, you, you matter too, I promise you do, you matter to me…
But the others thought of him as inspiration. In times of pain and sorrow, his words of encouragement and ready would motivate them. They found wisdom in his words.
Come out of hiding I'm right here beside you…
But the others thought of him as a foundation. When they were wary and fearful, they knew he would guide them in the right direction, ground them. They looked up to him. They were proud of him.
As long as you'll have me…
But the others thought of him as a hero. They admired him, admired his persistence. They were in awe of his skill and heart. Amazed by his strength, they knew he would be there for them, they could count on him.
I do, promise you do, you matter to me…
But the others thought of him as teacher. Not only was he smart, but he was kind. There were times they envied his talents and his brains, but more than often they cherished them, cherished him, as a person and friend.
You'll see…
They struggled, they fought, they cried, they shouted… life was hard, they couldn't handle it on their own. Luckily, they weren't. None of them were. They were a team. They were a family. They all wished to be something they weren't, but those little things they hated about themselves were things the others held dear.
You matter to me…
"You matter to me," they would say to one another. "You matter to me."
I hope you all enjoyed this!
Lemme know if you guys have any ideas for oneshots because I have intense creative stifling for all of the things I'm writing :\
