Basic Disclaimers:

1. I don't own Glee.

2. I don't own "Percussion Gun" by White Rabbits.

3. I haven't been a teenager in four years. I've never been a teenaged boy. I've known many and live with two but this is only an approximation.

Warnings: Teenaged boys. Miscommunication, osculation, masturbation. Puck drowns in an Egyptian river. Spoilers for season 01, episode 01.

Please note the rating change. We've made it up to M.

This Is Not Forever, Just Always
It's been a while / So I'll just beg, borrow / And steal all your time

The second time Puck asks Rachel out, it's the summer before his life goes to shit. And she refuses. Puck blames Zach because she doesn't know who Finn is yet.

They haven't spoken to each other for nearly a year. Apart from the slushies, interaction between them has gone from as much as possible, everyday, to as little as possible, as rarely as possible. Rachel regrets telling Noah her schedule before they started school because this means he knows exactly where she's supposed to be all day and he uses this knowledge to his benefit. She's had so much ice thrown in her face this year; she thinks she might never ever feel the need for Botox.

As for Puck, he's gotten over the guilt of dousing his ex daily (and making her sick that one time it rained and he got her just after the final bell). She's a total outcast and while he understands his role in making her what she is, he also understands why the rest of WMHS cannot stand her. It's beyond freaky, he thinks, because she wasn't like that when they dated. Sure, she had been crazy determined and full of more four-syllable words than his biology textbook, but she had been fun. He would worry about her if she wasn't so obviously asking for all the shit people put her through.

As the year winds down, Rachel readies herself for a busy summer. She has managed to convince both her vocal and dance instructors that the three weeks she and her fathers are planning to spend visiting relatives and theatres in New York is enough time off for her this year. She's very excited about seeing the Big Apple. The Berry family goes away every summer and Rachel always wants to go to Broadway but her fathers insist on variety. Last year, before she met Noah, she had spent a fortnight in Spain. This summer promises so much for her. So when she gets back and discovers two letters informing her that the Lima Centre for the Performing Arts is closed until September for repairs, there are no words (and definitely there is no song) to fully express her tumultuous emotions.

Puck's summer is no less adventurous, although in a very different way. He starts his pool cleaning business early and the cougars... well, he spends the first half of June wary of them and then he gets it and he revels. He goes from being just one the guys with experience to being the number one stud (and, ok, he actually only sleeps with three cougars—the others will look and tease but they're not stupid enough to touch; he's just barely turned sixteen and they know it.) The rest of his summer is spent between the baseball field, the JCC (he's gotten the lifeguard gig again but now he does what Zach did and one of the kids from East Lima Middle has his old job), and helping his mom around the house.

It's on one of the days when Puck has just finished up with baseball and isn't expected anywhere for the rest of the afternoon that a familiar black pick-up pulls up to the 7-11 where he and some of the guys from the baseball team are hanging out. Puck is actually drinking his slushie when he spots the truck. At first, he thinks he's mixed up because seriously, the dude got out, what would he be doing back in Lima? Then, as the vehicle pulls closer, Puck realizes that it really is Zach's truck. It stops directly in front of the group. Puck doesn't remember the tint being so dark but who knows what Zach's done to it over the course of a year? The passenger side window rolls down.

"Holy shit, Puckerman. What the fuck happened to your hair?"

After they've done the whole how-was-college thing, it seems like they're just driving aimlessly around Lima. Then, Zach starts making a number of turns too familiar to Puck. Shit. Puck might be completely unrepentant about what he does to Rachel at school but this—in Zach's presence, in Zach's truck, in the midst of summer—reminds him of too many things he's made himself forget. Puck tries distraction. He asks, "Hey, dude, aren't you hungry?"

College has not been good for Zach—it's totally lengthened his attention span. He answers, "Sure. We'll grab a bite as soon as we pick up your girl."

That was a fucking low blow, Puck thinks. But he doesn't bother with the twisting in his gut, just decides to come out and tell Zach the truth. Puck's a lot of things, not all of them virtuous, but he's never been a liar. He runs his hand over his 'hawk and figures that they have five minutes before they get to Rachel's house.

"Look man, Berry and I broke up. Like, a year ago."

Zach laughs. What the fuck?

"What did you do?"

Now Puck finds that just a little bit offensive. He counters, "Who said it was my fault? I'm not the fucking crazy one in this relationship!"

By the time he realizes what he's said; Zach is looking at him with one eyebrow arched. Puck doesn't need him to say the words to get the message.

"Dude, it's over. It's been over for a year. Can we just get some fucking food now?"

They drive past Rachel's house without stopping. Puck pretends not to stare at the figure watering plants on the front porch as they pass by and Zach pretends not to notice.

It turns out that avoiding Rachel while hanging out with Zach is downright impossible. A week after Zach's unexpected return to Lima, the two of them are hanging around the JCC pool again when she comes in. She glances across at Zach with a smile and Puck watches her expression harden when she sees him standing next to her old schoolmate. It doesn't bother him at all because she should know she isn't welcome in his circle.

"Oi, Rach! Get over here!" Zach calls out.

Puck scowls outright. Someone (he glared hard at Zach's smiling face) needed to get the memo about ...whatever this was. They didn't hang out. They didn't even speak to each other anymore. Puck would walk away if he was absolutely certain it wouldn't make him look like a total wuss. He settles for sneering at his ex as she makes her way daintily toward them. (Jesus, where does she buy those swimsuits? Puck doesn't know anyone else who owns one-pieces sexier than bikinis.)

"Good afternoon, Zach. How're you today?" she asks, completely ignoring Puck's presence.

Two can play at that game. Puck smirks in the general direction of the Katz twins (never been there, probably never gonna do that, because he doesn't fuck with the Jews in Lima—have you met his mother? She'd have his balls on a platter in Temple before he even knew they were missing) and acts like he isn't listening to her complain about the Arts Centre closing for renovations.

Zach is telling her about life at music school. She's captivated and Puck is actually pretty interested too. He's been putting more effort into his guitar playing—chicks dig that kind of thing and it's a fact that rock stars get more action than even they know what to do with—so maybe that's an option he'll keep open. It's not as awkward as it could be so long as Noah and Rachel don't ever interact with each other directly. Then, everything changes.

Zach makes a comment (maybe it's a little bit inappropriate given the fact that he's known Rachel since she was three and he was seven) about how Rachel must be the envy of all the girls in school now that she's looking all grown-up and Puck almost scoffs but winds up mostly choking on air when he turns his head. Looking over at them, there's no way he can miss the appreciative sweep of Zach's eyes up Rachel's legs and alarm bells start blaring inside his head.

First of all, let there be no question about it, Puck trusts Zach implicitly. Zach is his boy, or perhaps, it's better to say that he's been Zach's boy for as long as he can remember. Whatever way you word it, Puck could never think badly of Zach. Ever. But then there's also something about Rachel that makes Puck do stupid shit he can't explain. Like, throw slushies at her almost every day but beat the blood out of anyone else who tries to do anything else to mess with her. (It happened once last February. A senior, Brian DeVries, had walked into the locker room and explained in detail his little plot to land Berry in the school pool and then strand her outside in the middle of winter and Puck had just launched himself at the other player. It had taken Matt and Finn to pry him off. Mike had been the one to explain that no one played with Puck's toys without his permission and left it at that.)

When Rachel blushes and giggles, Puck doesn't even think twice about what he's doing. He shoves his binoculars into Zach's bare chest and gets up. Passing by Rachel, he snags her wrist and hauls her along behind him around the corner leading to the bathrooms. She follows easily until they turn the corner then catches herself and digs her heels in.

"Noah!" she shouts. For such a little girl, she's surprisingly hard to drag when she doesn't want to be dragged. "Noah, stop!"

He figures where they are is private enough so he stops abruptly, lets her stumble into him and turns to face her. "You're a sick, sick girl, Rachel."

Her face crumples. Puck really wants to know what that's about. What did she expect him to say? (He knows what she expected and he wasn't going to say it. It isn't true. It isn't.) He watches her pull herself together, tears glistening in her eyes but never falling.

"I don't have anything to say to you," she says, "and I definitely don't have to stand here and listen to you. Excuse me."

She tries to push past him but he stops her again, his hand firm on her arm. "He's four years older than us. We've known him since we were kids. You can't date him. It's illegal."

Hypocrisy: It's a talent.

"It's none of your business," she replies. Her voice has lost the waver it had moments before. With angry determination, she shoulders her way past him and he lets her this time. When he gets back to Zach, Rachel and all her things have disappeared from the pool.

Not a whole week later, Puck is headed in the general direction of the old music room where they spent most of last summer with a huge box of crap for the storage closet at the end of the hall when he hears a couple of notes being plucked on the piano followed by a familiar laugh. He doesn't make a conscious decision to eavesdrop, he just stops before the doorframe and stares at the reflection in the mirror hanging on the opposite wall.

Rachel and Zach are sharing the piano stool, side pressed against side, and Zach has obviously just done or said something to make her giggle and blush again. Puck's grip on the box tightens but he doesn't move away. When Rachel's laughter ceases, Zach's tone is a forced sort of casual that in no way disguises his seriousness as he says, "You two really did a number on each other."

There's no response and Puck can't see Rachel's face now that she's looking down and letting her hair curtain it off from (he assumes) both boys.

Zach leans back and lets out a breath. "I mean, Christ, I've been through high school. I've seen the best and worst of them fall apart at the seams and you guys pretty much take the cake."

Puck is confident he's figured out what this conversation is about and he finds himself stuck in place, morbidly fascinated by it.

Zach continues on, "I should kick his ass, Rach. He's my boy and all but you're my girl."

Holy motherfucking shit. Fuck!

Puck's knuckles are white, his fingernails digging into the cardboard he's holding, and he is entirely incapable of thinking in anything other than curse words. When he's finally able to think in actual sentences again, he feels sick because Zach is dating Rachel.

Zach is dating Rachel.

Suddenly, Puck can't be there anymore. He doesn't want to be anywhere near the two of them. He mostly doesn't want to think about why he feels this way. He doesn't do feelings. At all. And, for fuck's sake, he doesn't fucking feel anything for Rachel fucking Berry except revulsion. She's such a ... crazy midget. (Seriously? That's the best insult he can come up with?) He turns around and marches in the direction he came from, not caring about stealth or discretion or anything apart from getting the hell away from the two of them.

That night Puck gets drunk with the guys from high school, gets a blow job from a random Cheerio (Santana had vanished into a room with the new blonde import early on so that was off the table) while Finn is driving Quinn Fabray home way before regulation curfew, and then Puck throws up in the bushes behind Matt's house. He stumbles back inside and leans heavily against the dishwasher listening to people filter out the door. He winds up crashing in Matt's guestroom and missing his morning appointment with Mrs. Hilman (one of the three cougars that will actually have sex with him) and only makes it home at noon because Matt's big brother gives him a lift before he heads downtown.

In the shower, with nothing but white tile to distract him, Puck makes himself nauseous thinking about Zack kissing Rachel, Zach touching Rachel, Zach doing things to Rachel that Puck had only been allowed to imagine the summer before. Somewhere along the way, the 'Zach' in his head becomes 'Noah'. The fist he has pressed hard against the tile loosens and reforms around his hardened cock and he makes himself come with Rachel's name bitten off between his teeth.

Afterward, when he's leaning against the cold shower wall panting for breath, Puck knows he can't fucking do this. He's already got a sort of itch for Quinn and now that Finn is dating her, he can't be pining for both his best friends' girls. He's a stud. He can have any girl he wants so those two? They can have their pansy-ass boyfriends.

This resolve doesn't stop him from making lewd, half-serious passes at Quinn while Finn's busy getting drinks at some party two nights later. And, God help him, it doesn't stop him from cornering Rachel in the corridor off the music room of the JCC eight days after that. (What the fuck is wrong with him?)

He gets Rachel alone like this: The JCC has a monthly youth gathering thing—fuck if he knows or cares what the hell it's actually called—and, since he's their new senior lifeguard, Zach's mom calls his mom and gushes about what an upstanding young man Noah is becoming and somehow he winds up being absolutely obligated to attend. He expects it to totally suck ass. Surprisingly, it doesn't.

Apparently, those Kradman brothers from Carmel have more balls than he gave them credit for because they know where the JCC keeps its alcohol and aren't too chicken shit to steal it when some of the older kids sneak away from the room full of screaming elementary brats. It's Manischewitz, of course, but it's alcohol so none of them are picky about the sickly sweet taste.

Exactly as Puck expects, Rachel isn't one of the ones who indulge in this little act of delinquency. She's stuck by her boyfriend's side all night, hanging about and making nice with all the kids Zach has to tolerate (she was even smiling at Ben-Israel at one point) and generally being the perfect candidate for Mrs. Junior Rabbi (Puck realizes at this point that he's watched way too much Fiddler on the Roof if he thinks any of that shit matters in this day and age). Puck does his best to ignore her existence, just as she ignores his, and manages to snag an unfinished half bottle of wine for his own. He's nicely buzzed when he notices the skirt sneaking out the side door.

Well, well, he thinks to himself, where could she be going all by herself? Even in his head it sounds sarcastic because he very well knows where she's headed and what he really wonders is what could possibly have driven her away from the "party". He actually finds it sad that maybe even the little kids didn't want to have anything to do with her. Between those thoughts, he's gotten to his feet and wandered off behind her, the bottle he'd been nursing now lying sideways and empty on the itchy carpet of the hallway by Josh Kradman's patent leather shoes.

He catches up to her on the second floor. She stops at the top of the stairs and turns to stare down her nose at him. He smirks to himself because she hasn't been able to look him in the eye since they were seven. Puck doesn't think about knowing her before last summer often but sometimes little observations like that slip in when he isn't paying attention. He walks up to her, stands on the step directly in front of her so that he's inappropriately close. She doesn't back away. Instead, she crosses her arms—don't think Puck doesn't notice what this does to her breasts—and glares up at him, obviously pissed at him taking away her vantage point.

There's a whole book of words he could say right now (it's called a 'dictionary') and a whole gamut of emotions he could express but none of them, not a single one, wins out. Puck's never been much of a talker, never been big on words in general (don't tell anyone but he's always preferred numbers), so it doesn't surprise him so much when he leads with an action instead. The action itself kind of shocks the shit out of him though.

Before Rachel knows what hit her, Noah's kissing her. He forces himself up to stand on the same level with her and then walks her backwards until she can feel the hallway's decorative chair rail digging into her back. The kiss tastes sweet; overly so and she recognizes the taste of Concord grape wine. She would push him away—she actually raises her hands to his chest to do just that—but Noah kisses her in a way no one else ever has (in a way, she suspects, no one else ever will) and it does something to her motor functions: shuts them down completely. Her hands clench around the fabric of his button down and stay there.

As for Puck, his mind is screaming a hundred different things at him at once. Honestly, this isn't—wasn't—his intention. When he got up to follow Rachel, he hadn't actually had any particular plan of action. All he knew was that there was this girl—this beautiful, crazy girl who drove him absolutely wild with her short skirts and huge words and fucking unbelievable ability to kiss, who made him want to set himself on fire with how much she confuses the shit out of him, who was dating his fucking hero—who he had had first. Now he didn't have her anymore and, fuck it all sideways, he wants her. (A part of him that he denies exists suggests that maybe he always has and never stopped, high school be damned.)

He wants her and she isn't denying him so he takes. His hand comes up to cup her cheek, to angle her head just that little bit, and he's as surprised as she is when she opens for him. He leans down without thought, without permission, and licks his lips and hers in a single swipe of his tongue. The taste of them, of her and him and alcohol and the forbidden all in one, makes him move forward. He can't remember when he managed to back her against the wall, but he still doesn't feel close enough. He wants Rachel wrapped around him, wants to feel as much of her as he can, wants her body pressed against his until there isn't space for light to pass through and then, maybe, he'll have enough to sate whatever it is that makes him follow her. He followed her.

That thought is jarring but it isn't enough to make him stop kissing her. He doesn't think there's anything in the world that can make him stop kissing her. For some reason, that thought makes him kiss her even harder, even deeper, even more. Tilting her head back farther, he sucks on her swollen lower lip, now devoid of the watermelon gloss she was wearing, and tangles his fingertips in her hair. His heart is beating a ridiculous rhythm in chest and he's pressed so close to her that he can feel hers beating an unsteady, discordant staccato.

Eventually, he slows just enough for their kisses to turn languid and he stays there. Rachel is kissing him back, her whole body tucked neatly into the frame of his, she's so fucking tiny. Bit by bit, in the littlest increments, her hands unclench and move their way upward. When her fingers brush the skin of his neck, he moans. Holy shit, what is this?

That thought doesn't stop them either.

She finally gets her arms wrapped around his neck and pulls him closer. It offsets their balance though, so one of his hands comes away and he leans his forearm flat on the wall. The other buries itself further in her hair. It's comfortable and wonderful. Neither of them can do anything but stay there and kiss. For a moment, Puck thinks he should stop because this is the girl who left him for glee club, the total loser he personally torments every day, Man-hands. She thinks she should stop because, while this feels like Noah kissing her, it could just as easily be Puck playing a horrid, horrible trick on her (and she doesn't think she can walk away from this one in one piece if it is).

They still don't stop.

They're so wrapped up in their thoughts and the feel of each other that neither notices the sound of someone climbing the stairs. The hallway is dimly lit but is by no means dark so the person who finds them can clearly see what they're doing.

"Rachel?"

So, there is one thing in the world that can make him stop kissing her: her boyfriend.

Rachel wrenches away so abruptly, she's smashes Noah's hand between her head and the wall. He doesn't even seem to register the pain.

She looks at Zach, eyes wide and guilty, and Noah mutters a low, harsh, "Fuck."

Right. Her boyfriend. Zach.

"Fuck," Puck repeats. He pushes himself away from the wall and thanks God, Moses and all the Angels that his buttons didn't catch in the lace of her dress. It's bad enough that he has to tug at her hair to get his left hand back. He thinks he hurts her when he yanks a little at the fine strands that just cling. It doesn't matter, he just needs to get as far away from her and her boyfriend (what kind of boyfriend just stands there and watches them disengage anyway? Fuck, Shapira, react!) as possible, as fast as possible.

Without looking at Rachel again (Puck isn't stupid, he's lucky to still be standing after what Zach just caught him doing), Puck mumbles something that sounds like sorry and fuck this and whatever all in one in Zach's general direction then heads the opposite way down the hall. When he turns the corner, he catches a glimpse of the two of them standing in the same places he left them. Zach hasn't moved any closer to Rachel, he's just watching Puck with some unreadable expression—it isn't anger, which totally confuses the hell out of Puck. Rachel (God, just thinking her name does things to his insides he'd rather not explore) is still backed up against the wall (is he supposed to find that as sexy as he does? He thinks it's because he put her there) with her head lowered and her tangled hair (now he knows it's normal to find that sexy) shielding her face from the rest of the world. He almost feels bad for the shitstorm he knows he's just created for her and walked away from but survival instinct, you know. Fight or flight; he's not going to duke it out with Zach over Rachel.

She's a loser, he reminds himself.

She didn't want you.

When his mom comes to pick him and Sarah up, Puck sees Zach hugging Rachel beside her fathers' black sedan. Girl gets away with everything.

(He finds long strands of brown hair tangled in his cuffs before bed and spends an hour just twining them around his fingers. Fuck off, he's bored.)

The next day, his mom is off work and lets him have the car since he has his driver's license now. Awesome. What he does with this freedom? Not so awesome. The first thing he does is call Finn and ask him if he wants to joyride. Finn has plans with Quinn. Matt and Mike have some field trip-type thing they're doing with their break dance group (if you ask Puck, that's a little bit gay but whatever) so Puck has a car all to himself.

Zach, obviously, is out of the question because not only does the guy have his own pick-up truck (has had it since he turned sixteen, the lucky bastard) but Puck is sure he's the last person Zach wants to hear from today. He decides he'll just burn gas; drive around a bit with the volume up and the windows down, and then grab a slushie. He's on his way home with a cherry slushie in one hand when he realizes what street he's on. He slows for the turn and doesn't gun the engine past her house—that's the reason he sees her sitting by her window, he isn't looking for her. Nothing can explain what he does next.

He pulls up to her driveway, gets out and knocks on her door. Her father, the little white one (Adam), opens it. Last year, Puck had gotten to know the Berry men well enough. They're nothing special, just regular dudes who just so happened to like kissing other dudes. Puck is not homophobic. It just so happens that the only homo at McKinley is a loser. Puck's a bully, not a bigot.

Anyway, Adam Berry is, in a word, confused about Noah Puckerman's presence on his doorstep because Rachel had announced their break up to the household filled with righteous indignation over Noah's utter lack of regard for her passions and a tremor in her voice that betrayed just how much she hadn't wanted the relationship to end. The slushie cup in Noah's hand puts the man on guard. Rachel may be a stellar actress but she's a terrible liar so her fathers figured out what was going on at McKinley pretty early on. They had tried to convince her to move to Carmel while it was still early in the year but she had been adamant about making McKinley work for her. So far, the only things 'working' for Rachel were Lima's numerous dry cleaners and the Berry washing machine.

"Mr. Puckerman, what can I do for you?" Adam asks. He doesn't open the door because there is no way he will allow some punk (not so little anymore, what a year can do for a teenage boy!) with a mohawk (that's new) to humiliate his child in her own home (he should respect Rachel more having dated her).

Noah shifts his weight a little then asks, "Is Rachel home?"

Adam gets the feeling Noah already knows that answer to this question. He studies the boy on his doorstep—the boy is taller than him now—and sees a distinct lack of malice. Lots of other things are going on behind that uncomfortable expression that Adam would like to decode but there's no intent to harm. He opens the door and lets Noah into the foyer before calling up the stairs for Rachel.

She's wearing something completely different from what Adam saw her in half hour ago. He looks at her pointedly and she blushes as she comes down the stairs. Through an awkward dance of silent conversation, the two teens step out onto the porch. Adam would spy, but he has a deposition he's supposed to be working on and he trusts Rachel.

Puck waits until he's sure they're definitely alone to clear his throat. "Look, Berry—"

"Oh."

Wait, what? He's said two words. Literally two words and she's already looking like he purposely ran over her puppy. "What?"

"It's ok, Noah, I understand."

What? "Understand what?"

"Last night. You were...you were drunk. I don't really have an excuse for my behaviour but you were drunk so it doesn't matter. I won't tell."

What the fuck is she talking about? "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I understand why you're here, Noah. You have nothing to worry about. Zach has no reason to tell anyone what he saw and no one would listen to me much less believe me if I told them so you needn't worry. Your reputation as McKinley's 'badass stud' is safe."

Puck would think the way she makes the finger quotes is cute if she wasn't spouting such utter bullshit.

"Hold on a freakin' minute! You understand why I'm here? I haven't even said three words yet, Rachel," he doesn't get why that makes her look him in the eye for the first time today, "and you've already had this whole conversation in your head."

He pauses because, unlike her, he needs oxygen to live and talk at the same time. She's staring at him like...like she doesn't have a boyfriend and she remembers what it was like to hang out in the back yard of this very house, laughing and listening to music and kissing when her dads weren't looking. Like she remembers what it felt like to be flush against each other last night without air between them, like she wouldn't mind doing it all again. Get a grip, Puckerman, she's dating Zach. He's probably just misinterpreting her pity for his doomed face. He's never been good at that.

The silence stretches between them until he breaks. He steps closer to her, not as close as he was last night but inappropriately close nonetheless, and whispers, "Come out with me, Rachel."

Her eyes snap up to meet his. She's as shocked as he is to hear those words come from his mouth. Puck hides his own surprise quickly. He's jumped; now all he can hope to do is land on his feet. He keeps his voice low and says, "I get that you have a thing for older guys, I get it. I'm a cougar-chaser myself. But you and me, we have fun. We always have fun. Come out with me. Zach doesn't have to know."

Shouldn't have said that. She looks at him in confusion and takes a step back. Damn it. "What does Zach have to do with this?"

He shrugs. "Nothing."

"No," she insists, "it means something. You wouldn't have said it if it didn't matter, Noah. I know you."

He laughs. "Yeah, right, babe. You keep telling yourself that."

Shit. Goddamn, Puckerman, this is not the way this is supposed to go! (He ignores the fact that none of this was ever supposed to happen because he was never supposed to stop here.)

She goes quiet, face tightening and then going blank and Puck braces himself for the blow. "If you've only come here to hurt me, Noah, please leave."

He doesn't even know why he was here in the first place. He turns to leave but stops on the first step down. He looks at her and warns, "He's not going to stay with you. He'll go back to college and meet someone he can fuck without getting arrested and you'll be stuck here in Lima with your show tunes and your glee club and my slushies on your face. Hope he's fucking worth it, Berry."

A tear rolls down her cheek and he takes off. He doesn't get home until it's dark and when his mom asks where he's been, nowhere sounds like the most honest thing he's said in ages.

Puck doesn't see Rachel for the rest of summer. He avoids Zach as much as possible even though he's still working at the JCC and still has Mrs. Shapira convinced that he's becoming an exemplary young man. (If she only knew.)

Towards the end of summer around mid-August, Zach hunts him down. When Puck sees him coming, he stays put and resolves to face whatever Shapira is bringing like a man. Zach doesn't hit him. Somehow, Puck winds up sitting in Zach's truck drinking a cherry slushie again and waiting for the older boy to speak.

Finally, Zach says, "I should kick your ass, Puck."

"Yeah." What else is he supposed to say? He knows he's getting off easy here. "Yeah dude, you should."

Zach scrutinizes him and Puck refuses to show how uneasy the attention makes him. "Do you even know why I'm pissed at you?"

The response comes tumbling out of his mouth before Puck can stop it. "Christ, man, I kissed your girl! Of course I fucking know why you wanna kick my ass."

The resulting bark of Zach's laughter is a surprise (Puck realizes he's spent way too much of this summer being surprised). Puck waits for Zach to get over whatever gave him the giggles. He's about to say more—he's not sure what, just more—but Zach cuts him off pre-emptively. "Puck—Noah—dude, Rach told me you were confused but seriously. Seriously, you thought I was dating Rachel?"

It doesn't sound rhetorical so Puck shrugs. Yeah, he did. Is it so hard to believe? He knows Zach has seen Rachel.

"Oh my God, you are so stupid. What the fuck made you think that?"

Another shrug. Eventually, reluctantly, Puck admits, "You call her your girl all the time now."

Leaning his head back against the headrest, Zach exhales harshly. "Idiot. When I say Rach is my girl, it's the same as saying you're my boy. She's this tiny little chick and she's my friend so I look out for her. That's why I want to kick your ass. Do you have any idea what you've been doing to her head?"

OK, back-up a minute. "What I've been doing to her head? She's the one who let me think you guys were dating!"

"If you'd let her actually talk every once in a while, she might have corrected you."

"It's Rachel," Puck counters like it explains everything. In his head, it does. Rachel Berry never shuts up. Getting a word in edgewise takes the conversational ninja skills of a grand master or something.

"So?"

"All she ever does is talk."

Another bark of laughter. "She says she hasn't said twelve sentences to you this summer."

Knowing her, she probably counted them. Puck rolls his eyes. "It's not like we've spent that much time around each other. And we—we don't exactly talk about shit."

Zach slants his gaze in Puck's direction, "I know."

Puck feels himself blushing. There is nothing dignified about his life anymore. Besides which, "I didn't mean that, you friggin' perv."

Just like that, things are ok between them again. When Zach pulls up to the Puckerman driveway, he tells Puck, "Sort this shit out. Rach is...you've been screwing with her head all summer and she deserves better. Either step up or back off, Puck. You're my boy but she's my girl—she's a girl—and I will kick your ass if I have to."


Puck isn't good with ultimatums. Given the choice of either/or, he goes for Option Three: Neither.

At the final party of the summer, Santana gets bored with her blonde plaything and is obviously in some fucked-up race with Quinn so when they're cooling off in a stranger's bedroom, she tells Puck that they're officially dating.

Whatever. From what Puck gathers of the arrangement, it means he's going to get hot sex on a regular basis. Awesome.

(And if it saves him from thinking about dating that other girl, no one needs to know.)

School starts back and Rachel makes the mistake of looking at him once when he's kissing Santana (Puck makes the mistake of looking back) and Santana makes it her personal duty to make her miserable. One Monday, Santana makes him buy a slushie—grape—and reminds him that he hasn't tossed one in RuPaul's face yet for the year.

He does it. The hallways are crowded and people stop to point and laugh. Rachel cringes, blinks, and then heads for the bathroom. She doesn't look at him as she goes but he's looking at her so he sees when her tongue flickers out to lick her lips.

He and Santana spend all lunch in an unused physics classroom on the second floor. Puck likes to use it sometimes because there isn't enough light to see clearly and Santana, for all her huge ego and bitchy personality, is just a small body in the dark.

Two weeks later, Finn joins Glee.

(It isn't over yet.)

TBC