See the prologue for the disclaimer, summary etc.

Enjoy!


Chapter one

Off to sleep

Grissom felt lovely when he was asleep. He always felt as if he was floating on air, or water, or some other substance that gave him a weightless sensation. His lips twitched a little, as he felt a cool something run over them. He frowned, not knowing what it was, and then slowly opened his eyes. She shut them again, but then almost throwing them open as he suddenly realized he saw a woman standing next to him. She smiled, and then with a blow he recognized her.

It was Sofia.

'Hello, Gil.' She said. Her voice echoed a bit, thought his apartment wasn't big enough to form an echo. He looked at her with an arched brow. She looked so.. peculiar. She had a silver glow around her, with hints of purple. Her long hair looked more silver-gold then sunshine-blonde, which is had always been, and her beautiful peach-coloured skin complex was now pale and gleaming, like the surface of the moon. She wore a soft lavender gown, and as Grissom studied her closer, he saw she had strands of lavender in her hair as well, put together with pearls. She looked stunning. Scary, but stunning.

'S-sofia?' he tried, and she smiled, yet shook her head. It made her hair move up and down, making her look like a young schoolgirl who was taking a bath.

'No.' she said. 'I am the Ghost of Christmas Past.' Grissom's jaw dropped. He had to make hell of an effort not to laugh in Sofia's face, or to make a smart comment, or do anything else that would pop the joke. She just looked at him, with her silver-grey-blue eyes.

'So.' Grissom said, when he found his speaking organ again, looking quizzically at the "ghost". 'What brings you to my humble home?'

She smiled again.

'I've come to take you on a trip.' Grissom's brows went up as she stretched out her glowing hand. He stood up, already starting to say things to stop this charade, but when he stood next to her, taking her in again from head to toe, he noticed she was indeed floating. As he looked at her feet, which stopped an inch or two above his carpet, he forgot what he wanted to say. He just took her hand, and the second his fingers touched those of the Ghost, he was also floating – for real this time – and they flew through the window.

Grissom didn't notice he'd held his eyes shut until he heard Sofia's soft, echoing voice again.

'Open your eyes..' she whispered, and he complied. First one eye, then the next, then both at the same time. He blinked a few times and looked around. He was in a bedroom. It was a bit cluttered – you could even call it messy – but it looked cosy. What looked like at least a dozen books were piled up against the wall next to the bed, throwing a shadow onto the bedside table. There was a big wooden closet on his right hand, which was half open, and a comfortable looking bed stood right before Grissom's feet. The sound of Christmas carols came out somewhere out of another part of the house, and a few Christmas cards lay on the bed.

'Where are we?' he asked, but before the Ghost had time to answer, a woman came in through the door that he didn't see- the one behind his back. He spun around, following the woman through the room. She sniffed, and when she held still in front of the bed, whipping her nose with her sleeve, Grissom saw she was crying. Her brown eyes were swollen and her dark blonde hair was a mess. She was shaking all over, which made her thin posture look even thinner. Still, she looked attractive. Grissom wondered why, and with a pang he knew.

Damn. She looks like Sara..

With eyes the size of dinner plates, Grissom approached the woman.

'H-hi.' he tried. 'Is, uh.. is there anything I can do to help you?'

The woman remained silent, accept for the occasional sob, and then suddenly turned around and walked to the closet. Grissom's gaze sought Sofia's, and when their eyes met, he didn't even have to ask.

'She can't here you, Gil.'

'Why not? Where are we?' She smiled again. This time, it gave him chills.

'Just watch. You'll see.' The voice of the woman startled him. He turned around, facing the wardrobe. Angry, yet defeated and sad sounds came from it as the woman came out again, carrying a suitcase.

'It's over. I've had it! What was I thinking, I knew it! Why do I always do this to myself? I knew! I always knew damnit!' She turned around again and came back with her arms full of clothes, which she threw into the suitcase.

'I'm done! I'm done here!'

'Laura?!' The threatening voice of a man filled the room, as a shape appeared in the doorway. From the corner of his eye, Grissom could see a glimpse of the figure. He was tall, also a bit thin-postured, with dark waves of hair and dark eyes, which burned with fury.

'What the hell do you think you're doing?' he whispered, looking the pile of clothes in the suitcase.

'What does it look like? I'm leaving! And I'm taking Sara with me!'

Grissom flinched when he heard her name, and he started to understand where he was.

'Sara!' Laura yelled. 'Sara, come to mommy!'

'You're not going anywhere.' The man stated angrily.

'Oh, yes I am.' She flung a few more shirts into the suitcase and closed it up. 'Sara!' she exclaimed again, and then forced a smile at someone in the doorway. Grissom turned around and saw-

'Sara! Come here, baby. Come to mommy.' Although Grissom had never seen photo's of Sara when she was young, he recognized her immediately. The dark curly hair, the gap-toothed smile, the bright dark eyes and thin posture. Even if he hadn't heard Laura call Sara by her name, he would have seen the resemblance. He smiled at the nine-year-old when he remembered she couldn't see him, and instead looked at the mother and father again. Sara soon ran into the arms of her mother.

'Laura,' the man started, trying to sound sweet, 'I'm telling you, you are not leaving me!'

Laura smiled wickedly, a smile that Grissom had seen on Sara so many times.

'Oh, hell yeah, I am!' She took Sara by the hand, took the suitcase in the other, and walked towards her husband.

'Let me pass.'

'No.'

'Let me go! Let me leave!' she almost screamed.

'NO!' Before Grissom knew what happened, the man had already slapped Laura, and she was on the bed, crying. Sara just stood there, eyes wide of fear and shock. She blinked a few times, and then walked over to the bed.

'Mommy, are you okay?' she asked softly, but her father went totally crazy.

'Don't you even think of going over to her, Sara! I warn you! Go to your room! Now!' Sara didn't move, and he just raised his hand to hit her too, when the woman jumped up from the bed and threw herself on top of him.

'What the hell-' the man muttered as he tried to get his wife under control again with a couple of punches. In between he tried to get Sara away.

'Sara! I told you to go! Get out of here! Get lost!' Sara just stood there. Grissom knew why she didn't move – she couldn't, she was totally shocked and numbed. A child of nine years old, that noticed this kind of violence and rage.. it was unbelievable.

'SARA!' he shouted and then the little girl suddenly seemed to find her senses again.

'Stop it!' she softly yelled. 'Please, daddy, stop it! Don't hit mommy. Please..' She started crying while her parents kept fighting. They now both had several injuries, and the guy was absolutely out of his mind with anger. Laura cried out when her husband punched her in the stomach and slammed her head against the wall, and when Grissom looked over to see how Sara was doing, he noticed her running towards the big closet. He went after her, and ducked into the darkness as well as she did. Sofia was right behind him – he could tell by the lavender light that lighted up the closet's inside. He heard the muffled cries and groans and when the doors closed, they almost disappeared. All he heard were a few soft sounds, sounds you couldn't place if you didn't know what was out there. He could make out a rapid breathing pattern, missed with a few sobs. After a minute or two, the sobs became more frequent, until he could certainly say Sara was crying her heart out.

He wanted to hug her. He wanted to take her in his arms and make the pain go away. But he couldn't.

'Make it stop.' Sara whispered softly in between cries. 'Make it stop, please!'

The next moment, Grissom felt Sofia's hand on his shoulder and they were flying out of the closet again. The environment faded away, and slowly equalized out again into the walls and interior of his own apartment. He breathed heavily as he sat on his bed, looking at the Ghost of Christmas Past.

'Why did you bring me there?' he asked. Sofia blinked.

'You can't run away from your past. It makes it worse. Make it a part of your future, that way, it is a part of you. That way, you can make peace with it. With yourself.' She gave another ghostly smile and then faded away, in a cloud of purple and silver. Grissom blinked a few times, wondering is he was awake, and when he pinched himself, he knew he was. But, feeling awfully tired right now, he decide to lay his head back on his pillow. Before he knew it, he was drifting away again, into a deep sleep..