So, it insisted on growing.

CHAPTER TWO

"Look…I could go in with you…"

Alex turned away from her study of the city's skyline and looked at Bobby, who was making a special effort to keep both hands on the wheel.

"That's kind of you," she said gently. "But I think they need to get used to the idea that I've turned down a captainship and a department head and resigned from the department before…"

"Before you tell them you're in love with…" Bobby shook his head. "Sorry. I'm still having trouble believing that."

"Why?"

"Because…Because you…You're wonderful…Because so many guys…Great guys…Fall at your feet…Because I've loved you so much for so long…Because I'm me…Because I expect every light at the end of the tunnel to be a train coming at me." Bobby smiled.

Alex reached out and gently brushed the soft curls on the back of Bobby's head. She loved touching him. They'd spent so much time not touching each other that touching each other was a wondrous thing. "I'm not a train. And I love you. But I don't want to give my parents…And the rest of my family…Too many shocks at one time…" She settled back in her seat. "It'll be ok. My Dad likes you. My Mom…Is getting there…"

"Yea," Bobby said. "But you're leaving the family business…And I'm the reason…"

"We've talked about this, Bobby. You're not the main reason. The catalyst, maybe…But not the reason…" Alex stared out the window. "There's the way the department treated you…But…It treated my Dad pretty shabbily…It didn't treat Logan well…It wasn't great for me in Vice, and the whole thing about Joe's murder…It…It was due…"

"Thank you for firing me," Bobby said after several moments of silence.

"What…"

"I…I can't imagine how hard that was…But you were right…It would've been much worse…For you to do that for me…Thank you…" Bobby took a deep breath. "I wasn't going to resign. Not after everything. If they wanted me out, they were going to have to push me out. There's a good thing…"

Alex snorted.

"I talked with a union rep. I've got grounds for fighting the dismissal. Probably wouldn't win, but it'd be plenty embarrassing for the department, especially if the whole Patrick Copa thing came out."

Alex winced.

"Don't worry," Bobby said. "I would never do that to you. And if I learned anything from Deakins, it was how to put the greater good ahead of your own. But for keeping quiet and going away, I will get to hold on to my pension benefits. They're not huge, but it's a help. And it'll make me feel marginally better."

"They going to let you keep your Medal of Honor?" Alex asked bitterly.

Bobby smiled. "The union rep told me he mentioned how embarrassing it might be if it got out that the department was shoving a Medal of Honor winner out. Said it stunned the Brass. The rep had read all of my file, which was more than the Brass did. " He shook his head. "I never really thought that medal would be useful…"

"It helped my Dad like you," Alex said.

"It…I didn't deserve it," Bobby said. He turned off the highway and on to the road which led to the subdivision where Alex's parents lived. "Listen…You'll call me if there's any trouble?"

"Promise." Alex crossed her heart. "Give Deakins my resume."

"I will." Bobby eased his car to a stop in front of a neat, small, ranch style house.

"And I'll call Rodgers to confirm tonight." Alex opened her door. "You're still ok."

"My schedule has become very open," Bobby said. "Like I said….You need anything…There's any trouble…Call me…"

"I will…"

She waited for Bobby to pull and drive away, both to make sure he left and to admire his Mustang. "I probably won't get to see it much longer," she thought. As she walked towards her parents' house, Alex thought about the hours after she'd rushed away from Major Case. She and Bobby spoke for a long time about what they should do. "Strange," Alex thought. "In a couple of hours, I went from no future to a great one, at least in my personal life." She smiled. It wasn't so much that she and Bobby had made decisions as things had fallen into place. They would live together-it would be cheaper; they could make up for lost time; and they'd just spent eight years in each other's pockets anyway. They could live at Alex's house--it was newer and still had a mortgage; Bobby's home was unencumbered by debt; he'd been considering selling it in recent months and had had several legitimate offers. Bobby had even shyly, tentatively, charmingly brought up the subject of marriage at one point. Alex's heart broke when she realized he expected her to dismiss the idea.

"Bobby," she said warmly. "It's wonderful…Really...I'm really flattered and a huge part of me wants to say…No, scream…Yes…But…I'm just getting used to…I've just realized that I love you…"

"Yea…And the truth is…I'm still trying to deal with the idea that you love me…Uh…I'm actually kinda relieved…I mean…I can't think of a worse time for me to be thinking of marriage," Bobby told her.

"And…And this has nothing to do with you," Alex said. "It's just…I…I've always been someone else…"

Bobby looked at her with intense interest.

"I mean," she continued. "I've always been someone's daughter or sister or aunt…Or wife. I still am those things to some people. Hell…I've even been known as your partner…"

"Not always a good thing," Bobby murmured.

"It's a very good thing and I'm very proud of it," Alex responded. "But…For the past few years…I've mostly been Alex Eames…And I've like it."

"I…I can understand that," Bobby said. "And since I love Alex Eames very much, I certainly won't complain about you being her."

They ordered pizza for dinner, and both Alex and Bobby discovered that, after several days of having no appetites, they were very hungry. They ignored their phones aside from sending a general text message that they were all right to a select few. As Bobby cleaned up the pizza remains, Alex called Liz Rodgers to make sure the M.E. was ok.

"I'm ok," Rodgers said. "But…Thank you…Alex…Are you all right? And what happened to Goren? One PP was buzzing before I left this evening…"

"They…They told me I could be MCS Captain…If I fired Goren…"

"Bastard," Rodgers spat.

"I…I did officially fire him," Alex confessed. "Because I thought…I thought it wouldn't be as bad or hurt him as much…Bobby understood…It…It did seem better for him…"

"But not for you," Rodgers said gently.

"I…Then I quit…Quit everything…The department…Everything…"

There was a long silence. "Oh, Alex…Danny…Danny wouldn't have…" Rodgers choked. "Oh…I'm sorry…I don't have any right…"

"It's ok," Alex said. "Really…It's going to work out…It's already working out…I'm ok…Goren is ok…Could I…And maybe Goren…See you tomorrow night? Get a drink…Dinner….Something…"

Rodgers recovered. "Yes…Yes…I'd…I'd like that very much…Call me tomorrow…"

"I will…"

Alex and Bobby sat talking on his couch after that. They discussed details of Bobby's move into Alex's house. He was cautious and tentative, worried that he was invading her home and life.

"Bobby," she laughed. "You're not invading. Your stuff…Maybe…But not you…"

He smiled at her. She lay against him, using his chest as a giant pillow, and his right arm wrapped around her. "My books…"

"There's an upstairs room that's pretty empty…I'll need to clean some stuff out…But I think that'd work really well…"

"And I can bring my shelves…The books are…Are really the important things here…"

"Well, I'm not lifting and carrying them all," Alex said and scrunched up against him. His arm tightened around her.

She expected-hoped-that he would take her to his bed, and he did, but only after she'd drifted to sleep. She woke up and was confused for several moments until she realized she was in his bed. Bobby sat on the edge of the bed, his head resting in his hands. He turned towards her when she stirred.

"I…I'm sorry…Did I wake you up?" he asked gently.

"No…How…How did I get here?"

"You…You fell asleep…I carried you here…That couch…I should get to it and let you get some sleep…"

Alex sat up and caught his arm. "If that couch isn't good enough for me, it's certainly not good enough for you."

Bobby turned away from her. "It…I…I don't know what…What you want…Or expect…I…" He took a deep breath and looked back at her. "I…I want to make love to you…Very much…But…But so much has happened today…And…And I feel so…So overwhelmed…And…And I want it to be special…And…" He smiled wistfully. "I…I'm not a kid any more…I…I'm pretty wiped out…"

Alex leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Bobby. "I…I want to make love to you very much too…But I know what you mean…Overwhelmed is the word…But…I'd like you…I'd like to sleep with you…Really sleep…"

His lips brushed her hair. "Ok…"

He found her a T-shirt to wear. She was touched when he slipped away from the room while she removed her clothes and put it on. Wearing a T-shirt and pajama pants, he returned and slipped beneath the covers next to her. He smelled of toothpaste and soap, and he kissed her cheek. She kissed him on the mouth, and for several moments neither of them could breathe.

"I…I need to warn you," he whispered. "I…I have bad dreams…"

"Me too…Maybe they'll stay away tonight…Maybe we can scare each other's nightmares away…"

"Maybe…"

Whether it was exhaustion, relief, or the fact they clung to each other all night, neither Bobby nor Alex had bad dreams that night. Alex suffered a brief moment of panic when she woke alone the next morning, but she calmed when she discovered a note from Bobby on the pillow next to her. It promised her breakfast in bed if she waited, but she rose, showered quickly, dressed and headed into the kitchen just as Bobby, carrying a large bag, entered.

"Rats," he smiled. "I was hoping to get back before you missed me…"

"I missed you very much," Alex said and kissed him.

When they finally broke the kiss, Alex sighed. "I'd love to stay here all day," she said. "But I want to tell my parents before they hear about it from someone else…Like one of my brothers or uncles."

Bobby frowned.

"And I should tell them in person…I'll call and see if they can have lunch…"

"I'll go with you," Bobby said.

"No…Bobby…I appreciate it…But…But if you're there…"

"They'll blame me…They'd be right…"

"No…No." She held his face. "You're not…I mean…There's nothing to blame you for…It's just…You'd be the lightning rod…They wouldn't hear me…They may not hear me as it is…"

She called her parents as Bobby fixed breakfast. Her father answered, and Alex thought he seemed to know something before she told him she needed to speak to him and her mother. Against her sense of battle, Alex agreed to have lunch at her parents' house; she would've preferred a more neutral site. She and Bobby debated throughout breakfast over whether he would accompany her. He finally agreed to let her go alone if she let him drive her and would call him at any sign of trouble.

"I'll be your out," he said. "I'll call you back and say I need you and then drive up. They can't get that much more mad at me."

Deakins called just as they finished their second cups of coffee and ended their debate. As she cleaned away the breakfast, Alex heard Bobby's side of the conversation. Deakins clearly hadn't heard that Alex had been the shortest serving captain in the history of the Major Case Squad and quite possibly in the history of the entire NYPD. He also clearly wasn't surprised at the reasons behind her brief tenure.

"He said to give me a copy of your resume," Bobby smiled as he shut his phone. "Said he thinks he could find another spot for one of his good detectives."

All of these thoughts rolled through Alex's head as she walked up to her parents' front door. If those thoughts hadn't absorbed her so much, she might've noticed a few of the car bumpers that stuck just beyond the sides of the house, or the bodies moving behind the blinds and curtains of the front windows. She might have heard the voices whispering excitedly beyond the door. But she didn't.

She knocked on the door, and her father opened it. He seemed to be trying to hide his excitement about something. "Come in, Lexie."

"Dad…Is something…"

A roar of cheers greeted her. Alex stepped back, almost tripping over her father. Much of her family stood in front of her, laughing and smiling. Balloons floated, and a large banner saying "Congratulations" hung from the ceiling.

"Oh, God," Alex thought. "They don't know…"

END CHAPTER TWO