"Bonus" Feature : A Vulgar Conceit of Zorc Necrophades's True Feat (Summer Special Mockery of the Dark Lord)
And so this colossal cyst on civilization continues to torment as it did when it was young,
This accursed being seen by all, including yours truly, as the divinity of dung.
What monstrous force did it take for the bowels of the earth to excrete this creature?
Zorc Necrophades, the world's most oversized filth, is certainly not its loveliest feature.
Poor Geb surely cried in distress at the time this living excrement experienced birth,
Even the relief he felt after the expulsion of Zorc couldn't have possibly given him mirth.
And yet he still lives as an eyesore to all who must see this fearsome fecal material,
Something slightly more serious than the digested remains of man's sinful cereal.
An issue larger than any other feasible even when compared to the plight of man,
Something for which nothing exists that is large enough to serve to flush it down the can.
Most regrettably, there has yet to be research to find the appropriate cure,
To return this smelly substance back to his rightful sewer.
And also there is a lingering stench originating from Zorc the putrid smelling mass,
Potent is he who makes it by without meeting his demise from Zorc's odor as they pass.
And for eternity, it seems, shall Zorc be the embodiment of man's darkness that reeks,
Forever a piece of him shall stride the earth leaving most enormous streaks.
Zorc shall always be to humanity the literal embodiment of the concept of wastes,
A true abomination and horrifying entity who sickens mortals of all tastes.
Again I reiterate that Zorc is the only deity to have originated from Set's behind,
And the man who encounters him recoils in disgust at this disgraceful find.
And so this, my friends, is what the author of this story believes to be Zorc's true source,
Again, I askā¦.who in Ra's name had the power to create Zorc with that sort of force?
Nobody really wants to know the truthful details behind that, of course.
