Disclaimer: Nope. Not mine. I wish it was.
Setting: Lunchtime in the Great Hall. The Marauders as they begin to eat and make fun of James. Fun, lighthearted goodness.
"James, have you finished the Transfiguration essay?" asked Peter as the boys sat down to eat. "D'you think I could have a look at yours? I swear the bloody old hag has it in for me, always marks my papers with Trolls."
"Honestly Wormtail, how can you need help with the assignment?" said Sirius impatiently. "It's about Animagus transformations. You're an Animagus, if you haven't noticed."
"Keep it down, Padfoot," urged Remus. "People might hear you."
"Ahh, let them," retorted Sirius. "Nobody'd dare snitch on us, they'd know we'd prank their lives out."
James interrupted the argument. "Shut it, Padfoot, Moony's getting his knickers in a twist. Sure, Wormtail, I'll let you have a look after Defense. Speaking of Defense, did you see Evans' Patronus today? It looked like it might be a deer or something-maybe it's a stag?"
"Don't get your hopes up, Prongs," snickered Sirius.
Remus and Peter laughed.
"What?" James asked. "Why is that funny?"
"You're just so whipped, that's why," sniggered Peter. "Even though she hates you."
"What? She doesn't hate me! Nobody hates James Potter!" said James, trying to look dashing but failing completely.
"Maybe it's not hate, Prongs," said Remus gently. Or-he tried to. He was laughing too much to be really assuring, however.
"Yeah," jumped in Sirius. "You're not last on her list of possible kissees at all, actually."
"Really? You think so?" asked James, trying not to look too hopeful.
"Of course I am," he replied, pretending to look affronted. "I mean, Evans would pick you to kiss over Slughorn, wouldn't she?"
"Actually, no," interjected Remus. "I saw her peck his cheek after the Slug Club party last night out of gratitude."
Sirius and Peter sniggered at the look on James' face.
"You'll have no chance with her at this rate, mate," snickered Peter.
"Yes, I will! I have a very good chance, actually," protested James. "I even caught Evans looking at me yesterday by the lake."
"Oh yes," deadpanned Sirius. "You two will marry and have dozens of messy, black-haired children."
"Don't forget the green eyes," added Remus. "Although, as James' son, he'd probably be horrible with women."
"Oi, mate!" protested James yet again. "I'll have you know that my son will be very good with women! He'll probably even fall for a redhead, just you watch. Then you'll see that he has good taste."
"No, no, no," said an interested Peter. "He'd probably scare them away by inheriting Lily's temper."
"And-what? The kid would have a hero complex like Prongs here, too? You're pushing it, Wormtail!" said Sirius.
"Maybe he'll be good at Defense," mused Remus. "I'd like to teach James' son someday."
"Nah, I think I'll stick to teaching little James II how to prank people and do illegal stuff in Hogwarts," grinned Sirius. "I'll leave the serious-mind the pun- stuff to you, Moony."
"I think he'd be good at Potions too, if he's anything like Evans," said James, warming to the conversation. "I mean, he could only really fail if someone like Snivellus was teaching him."
"Snivellus-teach?" scoffed Sirius. "That's about as likely as rooms in the castle that we haven't found, don't you think?"
"Back to the point," said Remus. "I think James' son will be a very good man."
"He'll be a Marauder, mark my words," said Sirius. "Probably'll find secrets of Hogwarts we've never even thought about!"
"He'll be good at Quidditch, too," added James. "Maybe not Chaser, since I've already done that, but maybe Seeker."
"He'll be brilliant," said Peter loyally. "And he'll be a leader, just like you, James."
"Who's going to be just like Potter?" a voice asked suddenly, and as the boys turned around, they noticed Lily Evans and her friends standing behind them.
"Nobody, Evans," James said hastily.
"Just your future child," coughed Sirius.
"What did you say?" shrieked Lily.
"Nothing, nothing," said Remus. "Come on, you three, let's head to class."
As the Marauders headed out the door of the Great Hall, Lily Evans sat down with her head in her hands.
