[This chapter TOW Everything Happens Takes place 3 months after TOW Twister. Rachel is now 9 months pregnant and Joey and Phoebe are now a couple but no one knows about it yet. More chapters will follow so don't freak out if everything you were expecting doesn't happen just yet. Also I don't own these characters, Bright, Kauffman Crane does okay? NOTE: I wrote this one in script format instead.]

JOEY: Did you have a good time tonight?

PHOEBE: Yes, fake war movies are always entertaining, and that sub place does have great vegetarian sandwiches.

JOEY: Dude, whatever satisfies your appetite.

PHOEBE: Joey, how many meatball subs would you say you've had in your life time?

JOEY: Oh, at least like a million.

PHOEBE: Uh huh, that's what I thought!

JOEY: We sure had a lot of fun tonight, didn't we?

PHOEBE: Yeah, I really enjoy going out with you.

JOEY: I'm so glad I've found a girl who I can be in a relationship with. I mean sure having sex with 4 women a week is amusing, but it's nothing compared to being in a solid relationship with someone who you really care about, and it's not about sex.

PHOEBE: So you've gone three months without sex?

JOEY: Well, I wasn't going to like cheat on you.

PHOEBE: Aww, that's so sweet.

JOEY: Listen Pheebs, I can't believe I am actually saying this because it's the first time I've ever said it to a girl I was saying but….I love you.

PHOEBE: You what? (Teary eyed)

JOEY: I LOVE YOU PHOEBE BUFFAY!!

PHOEBE: I LOVE YOU TOO JOEY TRIBBANNI!!

* * *

(Chandler and Monica's apartment, Monica's cooking and Chandler is watching TV)

MONICA: OH MY GOD!!!

CHANDLER: What, are you okay?

MONICA: I swear, I must be hearing things, but I could have sworn that Phoebe and Joey just said I love you to each other.

CHANDLER: (in a squeaky voice) WHAT?

MONICA: I KNOW!!!

(Chandler and Monica both run out of there apartment and bang on Joey's door)

CHANDLER: COME ON JOE, OPEN UP!

(Inside the apartment)

PHOEBE: Oh my god, do you think they heard?

JOEY: Heard what? …. (Joey's dumb glance)…OH NO NO NO NO NO!!

PHOEBE: I know, damn it, so much for "our little secret".

(Opening the door)

JOEY: Hey man, what's up? (Casually)

MONICA: I think we need to be asking you and Phoebe that question.

PHOEBE: Why, what ever do you mean?

CHANDLER: We heard you guys, I mean is there something going on with you two?

(Joey and Phoebe look at each other and smile)

JOEY: Well, were trying to keep it a secret like you guys, but I guess three months is long enough. Yes, Phoebe and I are …

PHOEBE: In love.

MONICA: Oh my god, that's so sweet.

CHANDLER: Wow, that's so great, I am really happy for you guys.

(All of a sudden Ross comes running up the stairs).

ROSS: SHE'S IN LABOR!

CHANDLER: What?

ROSS: Rachel is in labor!

MONICA: Oh my god, this is like the most exciting day!

ROSS: I know! I'm going to be a father again.

JOEY: Well, it gets better than that.

ROSS: What do you mean?

PHOEBE: Joey and I are in love.

ROSS: Oh my god!

MONICA: I KNOW!!

CHANDLER: Where's Rachel?

ROSS: She's in the cab, come you guys we have to go NOW!

(They all scramble to get their coats and purses).

ROSS: I've got three cabs lined up but they are waiting, so hurry!

MONICA: (to Chandler) I'm going to be an aunt.

CHANDLER: I'm going to be Uncle Chandler.

PHOEBE: Don't forget about me, I'm going to an aunt too!

ROSS: Yes, I know this is all a lot to take, but do we really want Rachel to have her first born child IN A CAB!

CHANDLER: Geez, calm down Ross, these things take hours.

(Ross's cell phone rings)

RACHEL: (in the phone) Where the hell are you??

ROSS: We're coming sweetie, how are you doing?

RACHEL: I'm in labor Ross, how do you THINK I'm doing?

ROSS: Okay, well just hang in there we just left the apartments.

RACHEL: HURRY!

(At the hospital)

RACHEL: Oh my god, I feel so much better. Epidurals are better than sex!

ROSS: Well I am glad you're comfortable sweetie.

RACHEL: Yeah, I feel really fat; I can't wait to get her out of me. I'm excited to see her.

ROSS: Rach, you're not fat, you are so beautiful.

RACHEL: Thanks sweetie!

ROSS: You know what?

RACHEL: What?

ROSS: I'm really proud of you.

RACHEL: Really?

ROSS: You're handling this a lot better than I thought.

RACHEL: What did you think I was going to be wimp or something?

ROSS: No, but remember when Carol was in labor, she was a wreck. You're…you're so calm. I feel like I'm the one who's freaking out.

RACHEL: I know, but I think I know why I am so calm.

ROSS: What's that?

RACHEL: I'm really happy Ross, I know I didn't really ask for this or expect it, but now thinking about it, I'm so happy that I'm about to have a baby.

ROSS: Me too Rach.

(In the waiting room)

MONICA: This isn't fair Chandler. We've been trying to get me pregnant for three months, and nothing. I wish I were Rachel.

CHANDLER: I know honey, but three months is not that long. We're not going to give up, okay? I mean come on, having amazing sex every night, isn't that bad is it?

MONICA: No, that part I do like, but I've taken seven pregnancy tests and they have all been negative. It's like I get all excited thinking, maybe this time it'll be positive, but then to see all those negatives.

CHANDLER: (looks into her eyes) We're going to have a baby, I know it. And Monica, when we do it is going to be so incredible, because we want it so bad.

MONICA: We?

CHANDLER: Yeah, we. I mean in the beginning, I decided let's start trying…for you, but now I really want this too.

MONICA: Really?

CHANDLER: Yeah.

MONICA: Oh my god, that's so sweet.

CHANDLER: Mon?

MONICA: Yeah.

CHANDLER: I love you.

MONICA: I love you too Chandler.

(They smile at each other)

CHANDLER: You uh want to go for a walk?

MONICA: (looks around) OKAY!

(In hospital room)

PHOEBE: Do you want a visitor?

RACHEL: Oh sure, come on in.

PHOEBE: Come on Joey.

JOEY: So how are you doing?

RACHEL: Good, I'm already 7 centimeters, so it should be pretty soon now.

PHOEBE: You guys must be like totally excited?

ROSS: (looking at Rachel) Yeah, we are.

RACHEL: (smiles) so where are um Monica and Chandler?

JOEY: I don't know, I think they went for a walk.

ROSS: Oh okay, well I hope they are back in time.

PHOEBE: Don't worry, Monica wouldn't miss this.

ROSS: (looking at the monitor) Oh my god Rachel, you're having a big contraction.

RACHEL: Really? I don't feel a thing.

PHOEBE: Thank god for epidurals.

JOEY: Have you guys decided on a name yet?

RACHEL: Yeah, but we're not going to say anything until the baby is born.

PHOEBE: (Whispers in Joey's ear) I know what it is.

ROSS: No you don't.

PHOEBE: Oh come on, I know you're going to name her after me, it's so obvious!



(Doctor enters)

DR. WEST: Hello Rachel, are you feeling?

RACHEL: Anxious, does everything look okay?

DR. WEST: Yep, the heart rate is strong, and your labor is progressing well. I think in about an hour you guys should be parents.

ROSS: Oh my god, that soon?

DR. WEST: From the looks of things.

* * *

CHANDLER: Look, a utility closet!

MONICA: Chandler we can't do it now, Rachel is going to have her baby any minute now!

CHANDLER: Oh come on, you know how fast I can go.

MONICA: Okay…

(The audience knows that Chandler and Monica are going at in the utility closet and you here this from inside)

CHANDLER: Oh that's not good.

MONICA: What?

CHANDLER: A plunger just fell…in places!

MONICA: Chandler! Oh my god, pull it off!

CHANDLER: I'm trying…

MONICA: Damn it, I knew we should have brought the vapor rub!

(COMMERICAL BREAK)

RACHEL: Okay, it is starting to really hurt again. I swear to god, I'm never having sex again! ROSS!

ROSS: Oh my god, are you serious?

DR. WEST: Don't worry, they all say that, it's just because I turned her epidural drip off.

RACHEL: WHAT! Why did you do that?

DR. WEST: Well, Rachel, it's time for you to start pushing!

ROSS: What!

RACHEL: Oh my god!

DR. WEST: Okay, I'm going to need everyone except Ross to clear out.

JOEY: Okay bye you guys, good luck.

PHOEBE: Remember, YOU'RE NAMING HER PHOEBE!

(Joey and Phoebe leaves and Rachel gets ready to have her baby)

DR. WEST: Are you ready Rachel?

(Rachel like nods her head with tears in eyes and Ross holds her hand)

ROSS: It's okay sweetie, I'm right here.

DR. WEST: Okay here comes a contraction now I need you to push.

ROSS: Come on Rachel, you're doing great.

DR. WEST: Good! She's coming Rachel, I can see her, just keep going!

RACHEL: I can't, it really hurts!

ROSS: I know but Rachel, you're doing it, I can see her head.

DR. WEST: You're almost there Rach!

* * *

(Joey and Phoebe are nervously waiting outside the door and they see Chandler and Monica running down the hall)

JOEY: Oh my god, where were you guys?

CHANDLER: I know, we went for a walk but we got lost.

MONICA: Did we miss it?

PHOEBE: She's having the baby right now.

CHANDLER: Is she okay?

PHOEBE: As far as know, she's screaming like hell though.

* * *

DR. WEST: One more push Rachel and you'll be a mother!

RACHEL: Oh my god!

ROSS: Come on you can do it!

(Rachel keeps pushing and finally you hear a baby cry)

DR. WEST: IT'S A GIRL!!!!

ROSS: (crying) Oh my god.

RACHEL: (really emotional) I have a daughter?

DR. WEST: Yes you do, she is so gorgeous. Do you want to hold her?

RACHEL: (nods) Yes!

(Dr. West wraps up the baby in a blanket and hands the baby to Rachel)

RACHEL: I can't believe it, she's so beautiful. Look what we brought in to the world Ross.

ROSS: She looks just like you Rach, "hi, I'm your daddy"

RACHEL: "I'm your mommy, Lauren"

ROSS: Lauren Michelle Geller…I love the name you picked.

RACHEL: Thanks, you were right Ross, this is just so amazing. I can't believe I was worried about having this little angel in my life.

ROSS: Do you want me to go to tell the guys?

RACHEL: Yeah, have them come in.

(Ross goes out in the hall)

ROSS: Hey you guys!

ALL: Is she okay, how did it go? Etc.

ROSS: Everything is fine; Rachel and I just had a little girl, Lauren Michelle Geller. She is so beautiful guys, come on in and see her.

(They all enter the room)

RACHEL: Hi you guys, come here, Lauren wants to say hi.

JOEY: Oh wow, she's so cute and tiny.

PHOEBE: I know, wow she's perfect Rach.

MONICA: Oh my god, she's so beautiful. Can I hold her?

RACHEL: Oh sure (hands Lauren to Monica).

MONICA: Hi Lauren! I'm Aunt Monica. (emotional) Wow, you are such a gorgeous baby.

RACHEL: I know, having a baby, god it's just so amazing Mon.

CHANDLER: (whispers in Monica's ear) just think, you're next.

MONICA: I can't wait.

ROSS: Oh my god, Mon, are you pregnant?

MONICA: Not yet, but…

CHANDLER: Monica and I…are trying to have a baby.

PHOEBE: Oh my god, that's so great!

ROSS: Oh wow, yeah, that's awesome, than Lauren will have a little cousin to play with.

JOEY: Awww….

PHOEBE: You want a baby Joey?

JOEY: Someday…. if I don't have to change diapers.

RACHEL: Wow, I can't believe how much our lives have changed. The past was amazing, but it seems as though my life just keeps getting better and better.

ROSS: I know, this is so great, I can't wait for Ben to meet his sister! Hey, Mon, wasn't Carol supposed to call, I was looking all over for you, where were you guys?

CHANDLER: We uh, took a little walk.

MONICA: Yeah, we kinda made a little detour.

JOEY: Really, where to?

CHANDLER: The utility closet.

PHOEBE: You guy did it in a UTILITY CLOSET!

MONICA: Shhhh…..

JOEY: Damn it, I was sure I had sex in every possible place…CHANDLER!

ROSS: Lauren, do not listen to your Uncle Joey he has a very dirty mind!