The day dawned bright and unseasonably warm for early winter. AJ's first thought when she woke was that it was a beautiful day. Too beautiful, she thought next, as the pain came bearing down on her, for such a horrible day. For awhile, she simply lay in bed, not wanting to move. Because once she left the bed, she'd have to face the day and all that it brought with it. Finally, nearly an hour later than her normal time, she forced herself from the comforting warmth. Wrapping an old, tattered robe around her, she made her way down the stairs, surprised when she smelled fresh coffee.
Reaching the kitchen, she spotted Big Mac moving around the kitchen, fixing breakfast. She watched his movements, thinking to herself that he looked like one of those jungle cats she sometimes saw on the TV. Lean and graceful, but with an underlying strength that could surprise you at the oddest moments. He turned then, looking straight at her and she saw that same strength in his eyes. He opened his arms to her and she rushed into them, resting her head against his flannel covered chest as he held her.
In that moment, she was sixteen again, the day of another funeral. Only it had been summer then, warm and rainy. Dark, the way it should be when the people you love are no longer with you. Remembering, she let out a small, distressed sound and his arms tightened around her, settling her.
She stayed there for a few minutes before pulling away and offering up a shaky smile. "Thanks." She took breath, feeling steadier than she had since that afternoon when Rarity had come rushing into the barn, telling her something was wrong. "Needed that, I 'spose."
Returning the smile, he tugged her ponytail teasingly. "Anytime, lil' sis. Why don'cha get Apple Bloom up an' ready while I finish breakfast," he suggested, turning back to the stove.
AJ started to protest, started to suggest that she should finish breakfast and that he should wake Apple Bloom. But before the words could move from her brain to her mouth, she recognized the compulsion for what it was: cowardice. And if there was something she'd never been, it was a coward. With that in mind, she marched from the kitchen up to the littlest Apple's room.
Sunlight was filtering in through the window just above her sister's bed. Oblivious to the morning light, Apple Bloom was sprawled face down, snoring lightly. AJ smiled, thinking that it wasn't often she got to see her little sister so quiet and peaceful. And her heart broke again knowing that she was about to drag her from that peace into a world full of pain and loss. That was something else that was different from that day over five years ago. Apple Bloom hadn't even been nine months old then, so there had been no need to try to explain why there was suddenly a huge, gaping hole in their family. As she grew, they'd had to explain to her why she didn't have a mommy and daddy like all the other children in her school, but even then death had been a more abstract concept to her.
Now she had lost someone she'd seen every day of her short life. Death was real to her now, more real than it should have to be for someone so young. All of these thoughts flashed through AJ's mind as she stood and watched her sister sleep. Shaking them off, she lowered herself to sit on the edge of the bed and shook the tiny figure gently.
"Wake up, sleepyhead," she prodded when Apple Bloom didn't stir.
Apple Bloom whimpered and shifted, curling up into a ball on her side, pulling the blankets tightly around her. "Don' wanna go ta school," she mumbled sleepily. AJ rolled her eyes and shook her again, a little harder.
"Apple Bloom, y'all have ta get up, sugarcube." A little louder, a little firmer.
"Go 'way," came the muffled reply. I wish I could, AJ thought. She'd love nothing more than to just let little Apple Bloom sleep through the day, find a way for her to avoid the pain. But she knew as well as anyone that life just didn't work that way.
"Would you like me to try?" a voice asked from the doorway. AJ turned and saw Rarity standing just inside, already dressed for the day. The thought crossed her mind that it shouldn't surprise her that Rarity could make mourning black look stunning.
"Sure, have a go. She's sleepin' like the dead, though," AJ warned. Rarity padded barefoot across the room and shot AJ a grin before reaching down and yanking the covers from Apple Bloom's body. The latter squealed and bolted upright, glaring at the two intruders.
"What in tarnation did y'all go an' do that for?" she demanded, all traces of sleep gone from her voice.
Rarity handed the blanket to AJ. "You're welcome," she said simply, before retreating and heading downstairs. AJ shook her head and looked back at her sister, who was still glaring at her from her bed.
"Sorry, sugarcube, but ya'll need ta get up and get dressed." She watched as the realization washed over Apple Bloom much the same way it had with her earlier and the younger Apple's eyes filled with tears. Scooping her up, she sat on the bed and held her close, rocking her gently as she cried. "Shhh, it'll be all right, sugarcube," AJ murmured soothingly, her heart breaking all over again. They sat like that for awhile until Apple Bloom seemed to run out of tears.
"Let's go get some breakfast. Big Mac was makin' some when I came up ta get ya," AJ suggested, forcing a smile. Apple Bloom nodded and the two made their way downstairs, where they found Big Mac immersed in his own source of comfort. Rarity was perched on the counter, her legs wrapped around his waist, and the two lovers were locked in a passionate kiss. AJ quickly moved to block Apple Bloom's line of sight and cleared her throat loudly, amused when her brother jumped back and blushed like a school girl caught necking under the bleachers.
"AJ! We were, just...ah..." he stared blankly at her, seemingly at a complete loss for words.
"Making breakfast," Rarity supplied helpfully, slipping daintily off the counter and smoothing her dress.
"I ain't never seen anybody make breakfast like that," Apple Bloom piped up, moving out from behind her sister.
AJ lost it then, howling with laughter as both Big Mac and Rarity flushed brilliant shades of red. Before Apple Bloom could ask any uncomfortable questions, the timer on the oven dinged, and Big Mac dived for the door like it was his saving grace. AJ lost herself to another fit of giggles as he triumphantly pulled a batch of cinnamon buns from inside. She caught Rarity's eye and, seeing the humor dancing there, realized that they were going to be all right after all.
"AJ, it was a beautiful service. You and Big Mac did such a fantastic job."
AJ smiled and clasped the hand of the older woman standing in front of her. "Thank y'all kindly, Aunt Dumplin'. I know Granny Smith would be mighty glad y'all could make it today." Granny Smith's funeral had ended just over an hour before and her friends and family were gathered at Sugar Cube Corner for lunch.
Aunt Dumpling's eyes shifted and AJ followed her line of sight to where Big Mac and Rarity were standing, chatting with a group of cousins from Appleloosa. "Your brother seems so happy. We're all looking forward to the wedding." AJ felt her aunt's critical gaze shift back to her. "And of course we're all wondering when you'll find a nice man and settle down."
Never, if I have anything to say about it, AJ thought silently. "When I find a good man, I'll be sure to let y'all know," she said instead. Her aunt let out a twittering laugh and, satisfied for the moment, moved on to where Big Mac and Rarity were holding court. Relieved, AJ let out a long breath and turned – smacking right into Pinkie Pie.
"Oh, thank Celestia!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms around her pink-haired friend. Pinkie Pie returned the hug tightly, in true Pinkie Pie style. AJ pulled away just enough to stare into her friend's wide blue eyes. "Y'all aren't gonna ask me when I'm gettin' married, are ya?"
Pinkie giggled. "No, silly. Why would I ask such a thing?"
AJ grinned and took a step back. "No reason. Where are the rest of the gals?" she asked, looking around the room.
"Well, Rarity's over there with your brother. But of course you knew that because, well, he's your brother and you guys seem to always know where the other one is. It's kinda funny, really, how close you two are. Though I guess it's not really that funny, when you think about it. And I'm babbling," she cut herself off sheepishly at AJ's amused expression.
"Yea, but I'm used to it by now," AJ chuckled.
"Good point. Now where was I? Oh yea, Dashie and Fluttershy got waylaid by your Auntie Cinnamon," she pointed to a corner of the room where Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were standing with a red haired woman. Dash and Fluttershy were both wearing polite expressions that AJ assumed were an effort to mask the boredom they were fighting. Her Aunt Cinnamon was a sweet woman, but she could talk for hours about anything – and nothing at the same time. Dash caught AJ's eye and lit up like Luna's moon during the Winter Moon Celebration. She immediately (and, AJ hoped, gracefully) excused both herself and Fluttershy from the conversation and hurried towards AJ, practically dragging Fluttershy behind her.
"Finally!" Dash blurted out when they reached AJ and Pinkie. "No offense, AJ, but your aunt can talk. Ow!" She turned and glared at Fluttershy, who had just pinched her arm and was giving her as mean a look as Fluttershy ever gave anybody. "It's the truth!"
AJ smothered a laugh. "It's all right, Shy. Aunt Cinnamon could talk the ears offa stalk o' corn." She hugged Fluttershy gently and punched Dash affectionately in the arm. "Thank y'all for comin', it really means a lot to us. Even if we are missin' our favorite librarian," she added sadly.
"Twilight!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed.
AJ cocked an eyebrow in her direction. "Yea, Pinkie, I was talkin' 'bout Twi."
Pinkie shook her head and pointed to the front door of Sugar Cube Corner. "No, silly goose, it's Twilight."
AJ turned and sure enough, there was Twilight standing in the open doorway.
