Volition
by FanficAllergy and RoseFyre
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Chapter 2 - Preparation
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So what do you do when you're a stylist and you find out your soulmate is about to go into the Hunger Games?
In Cinna's case, you invite them to dinner.
The food looked delicious and smelled even better, but Katniss couldn't taste any of it. She was in shock. This wasn't supposed to happen! She wasn't supposed to have a soulmate!
She regarded the older man. He was not quite Haymitch's age, but nowhere near her own. Fate must be laughing at her. What use was finding out she had a soulmate now? They'd barely get a week together. It wasn't like the Capitol would exempt her from the Hunger Games, and even if she won, where would they live? By law, soulmates were required to get married. In the case of her parents, it had been a blessing. But in the case of the Mellarks...
And truth be told, she wasn't sure she wanted to marry Cinna anyway. She supposed he was attractive enough, but when she closed her eyes and tried to picture making love to him, his hazel eyes lightened to blue and his features morphed into Peeta Mellark's. Which was strange. Wasn't Cinna supposed to be her perfect match? Her parents had been soulmates and her sister was already planning her wedding to Vick. Why wasn't she interested in Cinna?
She let out her breath in a huge puff of air.
"That's a big sigh."
"I'm sorry?"
"Don't be. This situation isn't ideal, I admit, but I'm happy to meet you, Katniss Everdeen."
She bit her lip. "You are?"
"Of course, I am." His voice was calm. Smooth. Like silk over glass. It was the kind of voice which could lull a child to sleep. And it soothed the edges of her frayed nerves like a balm. "It isn't every day you find out your soulmate is one of the most amazing people you've had the honor of knowing."
"You've known me for less than an hour."
"What can I say? You make quite an impression." He took a sip from his wineglass. "I have a confession."
She looked at him in confusion.
"As lovely as you are, and you are lovely, my dear, I'm… just not interested."
"In me?"
"Oh no, it's not you," he hastened to explain. "I'm not interested in sex. In romance. With anybody. I'm honored the universe deemed me important enough to give me a soulmate, but I'm afraid a deep and platonic friendship is all I can offer."
Katniss felt a wave of relief, immediately followed by one of dread. "It's not like I have long to live anyway. So I suppose friendship is for the best."
"You say that like you're planning on dying."
She was in the Hunger Games. Twenty-four tributes went in, one came out. And it had been twenty-three Games since Twelve had had a Victor. "The odds aren't in my favor."
He took one of her hands and looked her right in the eye. "They will be if I have anything to say about it."
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Katniss was on fire.
Not literally, although her costumes all had a fire theme, with the pinnacle being her parade outfit, when she was engulfed in synthetic flames. But Katniss was also figuratively on fire. She'd received the highest training score, the Capitol bookies were giving her the best odds, and she'd even been approached by two of the Careers, inviting her to their alliance. She'd refused, of course, but the fact she'd been offered it at all was an indication of just how much of a threat they thought she was.
Now she had to do the impossible. Ace the interview.
Even with Haymitch and Effie's coaching, she still had the personality of a dead slug. Haymitch's words, not hers. But she couldn't disagree.
Thank goodness for Cinna.
Through everything, he'd been solid and supportive, knowing just the right things to say to keep her spirits up. While Peeta was a rock-solid partner, Cinna was the friend she needed.
And she was going to need him now.
As she walked onstage, she spotted her soulmate out of the corner of her eye, seated near the front of the theater, his warm hazel eyes conveying approval and admiration. The butterflies in her stomach started to calm slightly.
She couldn't remember much of the interview with Caesar. They talked about her sister and why she volunteered. Caesar asked her what she thought of the Capitol, which led her thoughts straight to her soulmate. Therefore, instead of talking about the food, which otherwise probably would have been her answer, she decided to talk about how she'd found so many wonderful people in the Capitol; it was a great surprise and she wished she'd gotten to explore it more. The comment wasn't directed at anyone but her soulmate. If she died tomorrow in the bloodbath, the one thing she would regret, other than not kissing Peeta, a voice in her head whispered, would be that she'd never have the chance to get to know her soulmate outside of the stresses of the Hunger Games.
That comment went over well with the crowds, as did her girlish twirling, showing off Cinna's amazing creation.
After her three minutes were up, she felt better about her chances.
Then it was Peeta's turn.
He was charming, vivacious, personable. He made the crowd laugh with an anecdote about his first experience with the Capitol showers. Like a skilled fisherman, he reeled the Capitol in before going for the kill.
When Caesar asked his go-to question of "is there anyone waiting for you at home?" Peeta rubbed the back of his neck and let out an overly dramatic sigh.
"Well, there is a girl I like. But I'm pretty sure she didn't know I existed until I got Reaped."
Caesar leaned toward him, glee on his face. "I tell you what. When you win this thing, you can go back home to Twelve and tell your girl how you really feel."
Peeta sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. "Winning... won't help in this case."
"And why's that?"
"Because she came here with me."
Katniss gasped, covering her mouth with her hands. Around her the crowd mirrored her astonishment. She felt the heat of thousands of eyes settle on her.
What should she do? Should she say something? Should she smile? She didn't know what was the right choice.
All she could do was stare at Peeta in shock. A maelstrom of emotions threatened to overwhelm her. Part of her was upset he hadn't told her sooner. Another part was angry he'd made his declaration in front of Panem without ever talking with her. Yet another part couldn't believe he meant her. But the last and largest part felt elated that he wanted her. Her hands drifted downward and a slight, almost shy smile, slipped over her lips.
When she confronted him backstage, the first words out of her mouth were, "Did you mean that?" rather than 'You had no right!' which she would have said if she'd let her anger guide her.
Peeta squared his shoulders, his eyes meeting hers. "With all my heart."
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Katniss and Peeta slept in the same room the night before the Games, in the same bed. They'd fallen asleep talking, about themselves, each other, and the Games. Neither of them had wanted to go any further than that. After all, despite Peeta's declaration, they were practically strangers. Still, it felt good to share the burden of going into the Games with someone who could understand.
When they woke up the morning of the Games, she felt surprisingly well-rested. Katniss even had a bit of an appetite, which surprised her. She'd thought she'd be too nervous. However, Peeta picked at his food, breaking apart a croissant and rolling it into little balls.
"What's wrong?" she asked around a mouthful of fruit.
"Nothing," he said quickly.
She raised an eyebrow.
"It's just… I'm not supposed to tell you."
"Is this another declaration like last night?"
"No…"
She set down her spoon. "Then what? You're making me nervous."
"You promise not to get mad?"
"No, why would anyone promise that?"
"I meant, I don't want you to get mad at me."
Her eyes narrowed. "I'm getting mad at you now."
Peeta sighed, pushing around the little balls of croissant, before coming to a decision. "Haymitch wants me to ally with the Careers. And… I'm gonna do it."
"What? Why? I don't-" She cut herself off. The thought of Peeta allying with those killers frightened her beyond coherent thought. "I think you'd better explain."
"I'm supposed to ally with the Careers. Not for real, but… so I can get close to them, maybe kill one or two, and then escape, taking some of their supplies with me. I'm also supposed to keep them from killing you."
"But they'll kill you!"
Peeta's lips quirked up into a half-smile. "I'm okay with dying, so long as you get to win."
"Did you ever think I might not be okay with it?"
"The thought never crossed my mind." He paused, looking at her. "I'm sorry. But I've made up my mind, and I'm going to do it. I'm gonna ally with the Careers. It's the best chance you've got of winning."
"No! We can figure something else out!"
"Too late," he said, looking up at Cinna and Portia, who'd come to collect them. "We're out of time."
She didn't want to believe that.
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Katniss sat in the Launch Room, her elbows resting on her knees, her head cradled in her hands, waiting for Cinna to arrive. Ostensibly it was to help her get dressed in whatever attire the Capitol deemed appropriate for this year's Arena. But for Katniss, it was her only opportunity to say goodbye to her soulmate.
When the stylist walked in, he didn't say anything. Instead, he opened his arms wide and waited. She went to him, drawing comfort from his warm embrace. They didn't need words.
Katniss was the first to pull back. "I'm sorry."
He shook his head, a smile on his lips. "I'm not. Even if we only had this one week, I'm honored to have been," he seemed to think the better of what he'd been about to say, "friend." The words were low, pitched so only she could hear them, and his eyes darted to the corners of the room. He paused, his hands coming to rest on her shoulders. "But I think you're going to win this, Katniss Everdeen. I'm not allowed to bet, but if I could, I'd bet on you."
"But that means Peeta's going to die."
"That's how the Games work."
"I'm not going to let him die," she said firmly. "Not for me."
Cinna nodded. "That's your choice. And I'll stand by you."
She hugged him again, saying goodbye the only way she could. "Thank you."
He held her tightly. "Anything, girl on fire."
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