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Lessons in Love and the Plight of a Teenage Dirtbag

El3v3n

All characters belong to either Naoko Takeuchi or Akira Toriyama.

[Warnings: crudeness, sexual innuendo/content, and general dirtbag behavior. There's a pretty saucy (and mega dirtbag) scene in here if you don't like that kind of thing this story is probably not for you!]


Steam was practically pouring from Trunks' ears as he pounded his feet along the sidewalk. His blood was boiling with irritation. The demi Saiya-jinn's anger was a trait he'd inherited from both of his parents but rarely displayed it outwardly. Gritting his teeth he shoved his hands into his pockets so forcefully the fabric nearly ripped.

Just who did that girl think she was? The heir to a multi-billion dollar fortune had screwed supermodels that had "fiancés," ones that had given them real diamonds, not crappy costume jewelry. And they had bent to his charms without any resistance. He knew with certainty they weren't thinking about their chump boyfriends while they were between the sheets with him.

And then there was this girl, Usagi… the one who had rejected his affections without even a moment's contemplation.

She wasn't even that great! He'd been with smarter girls…ones that didn't need tutoring of all things. And he'd definitely banged better looking ones, chicks with tits and asses so perfect that not even the best plastic surgeon in the world could hope to sculpt a better model. So who was she to reject him, Trunks Briefs, the most eligible bachelor in the country?

"Trunks?"

Lifting his stormy eyes from the sidewalk, Trunks scowled toward the waifish girl before him. He quickly rescued his expression, and smiled toward the person he recognized.

Hiyori used to be a student at Orange Star High before she accepted an offer to attend a famous ballet academy in Tokyo. She was a beautiful girl, even while dressed in warm up clothes with a duffel bag slung over her shoulder. The tall brunette had been ok in bed, nothing all that memorable but she made up for her shortcomings with those long and shapely legs of hers, the ones that were glorious to look at as they went on for days.

"Hey, Hiyori," Trunks greeted her, earning a blush and a bright smile. He still wasn't in a good mood, but he had an appearance to maintain.

"It's so crazy to see you here!" She responded excitedly, "What brings you over to this side of town?"

"Oh, just an errand," he answered, sounding a lot cheerier than he felt. Even as he stood there looking at the perfectly kind girl, the infuriating memory of Usagi's impudent rejection made him see red.

"I should probably get going, see ya later," Trunks shook the furor from his head as he began to continue walking.

"Hey, uh," Hiyori caught him before he was able to retreat, "I tried calling but you must have gotten a new number."

"Oh, uh, well you know how it is, broke my last phone and all that," he waved her off.

"Yeah totally," she held out her hand, "let me see it and I'll just re-add my number!" Again feeling the ugly head of his annoyance surface, Trunks blurted out his thoughts before he could catch and swallow the words.

"Why? So I can never call?" He winced when she remained silent looking both confused and hurt at the same time. "Hey," he immediately coaxed, "sorry about that, I'm such a jerk. To be honest with you I've had a really shitty day, can I take you out to make up for it?" The girl's expression changed immediately and instantly his transgression was forgiven, just like with every other girl he knew, they truly believed he could do no wrong.

Save for one exception.


"Wow," Hiyori showed her large white teeth in a grin whilst plucking at the fancy salad before her. "I feel so underdressed, it's impossible to get a table here, especially on a Friday night!" Trunks smirked.

"Don't worry about it, you look great," he spoke unconvincingly. The compliment, however, was satisfying enough for Hiyori as she went back to babbling about something or other, but Trunks' mind was somewhere else entirely.

He just didn't get it. No matter how many times he tried to come up with a rational explanation, he couldn't wrap his mind around how Usagi could have possibly rejected him. He pondered upon it throughout the entire dinner, normally he would have ordered half the menu and enjoyed himself but tonight he wasn't hungry. The vivid memory of the petite blonde's angry blues and her high pitched voice was the most ultimate buzz kill of them all.

Upon exiting the restaurant, Trunks pulled a capsule out of his pocket and produced an exclusive sport's car after tossing it on the street. Holding the door open for Hiyori, he promptly closed it after she gleefully took her seat on the passenger side.

"Thanks so much for dinner and the ride, this is so much better than taking the bus," Hiyori was hanging over the center console and rested a hand on his shoulder – clearly dying for a sliver of a chance for some physical contact.

"Uh huh," Trunks muttered disingenuously, as his mind was in a completely different place. He paid attention long enough to get directions to the girl's house before he tuned her chatter out completely.

'Usagi…the cute and tiny girl of Juuban who had humbled the great and powerful Trunks to his knees,' did not have a nice ring to it. Had she really screamed at him? Trunks' eyes glazed over darkly as he replayed the entire encounter in his head.

Oh, he could give her something to scream about alright.

Perhaps he wasn't giving the little vixen enough credit. She played the part of the innocent school girl so perfectly it seemed unreal. The just slightly baggy uniform clothing her petite body was a villainous tease to the imagination, and Trunks' was going wild.

At the center of his mind's eye he watched those pouty red lips of hers slither into a devious smirk. The way she leaned against his door so haughtily sent his blood traveling south so fast that he nearly fell dizzy. She was pleased with herself – her coy little performance had knocked him down a few pegs but if she really knew who she was dealing with, the little blonde would realize that this game of theirs was far from over.

She wanted him. He could smell it-taste it in the air that had suddenly become stale as if even the atmosphere was begging to sample the electricity between them.

Her once iridescent hues were black with lust and with purposeful steps he answered her beckoning call; watching with supreme envy as she flicked open the top button of her shirt followed slowly by the next. With a savage snarl he grabbed her wrist and pinned it above her as he consumed her simper with one of his own. The demi Saiya-jinn could only relish in the sounds she made and how quickly he had turned the once cocky girl into a junkie for the monster throbbing in his pants. Lucky for her, it was hard, tense and ready to play…

"Trunks?"

"Huh?" The lavender-haired teen was knocked out of his lust-filled daze. Staring at his hands on the steering wheel, he suddenly recalled arriving at their destination and was parked just outside the modestly sized home. Turning to the passenger seat, Trunks' hazy eyes fell confused on Hiyori's crooked smile.

"You alright there?" She asked him, the smirk on her lips growing with the question.

"Uh, yeah," he answered, rubbing the back of his head as he drew in a steadying breath. He needed a moment to regain his composure as that little fantasy of his left him feeling like he could break out into a cold sweat. Taking in another gulp of air, he reached for the door's handle.

"Sorry about that, let me walk you inside-"

"Wait," she urged him, halting his movement with a hand on his arm. "I would invite you inside but my parents are home…" she trailed, ghosting the pads of her fingers against his pricked skin.

"That's alright," he managed as the blood slowly trickled back to his brain. "I should probably get going anyway-"

"You sure about that, Trunks?" Hiyori continued, letting her eyes drift lower and lower until she was staring at the enormous bulge in his jeans.

His mouth fell slightly agape upon noticing his current "condition." Apparently he had been enjoying that little fantasy of his a little more than he realized. The fact that he hadn't intended to seduce the ballerina made the situation a little embarrassing, but after taking a moment to appreciate how hungry this girl looked for his cock, well, he wasn't too disappointed about how this had all transpired.

After returning the girl's question with a smoldering glance, soon he was reclined in his seat while Hiyori was gleefully unzipping his jeans. And to think, just a few hours earlier he had been lamenting what had happened with that girl. Why did he even care? While she was running back to her broke ass fiancée, he had a babe bobbing on his dick as if she had been starving for it for years.

"Oh, Trunks," Hiyori moaned his name, pausing to run her tongue along his throbbing shaft. "You're so big! I can hardly get my mouth around you."

"Nng," Trunks groaned, while gently giving her shoulder an encouraging squeeze. "You got this, babe." Hiyori responded with a giggle, but quickly returned to pleasing him without hesitation.

"Ahh, yeah, that's it," The lavender-haired teen coaxed, fully enjoying her hot, wet massage of his manhood. He had forgotten something for a while this afternoon but yet it again he was reminded.

Yes, it was good to be Trunks Briefs.

Lacing his fingers behind his head, he sat back intent on fully enjoying this encounter when suddenly the blonde pixie weaseled her way back into his thoughts. Just a moment ago he had been having a chuckle at her expense, but when she returned to the front of his mind, he didn't complain.

Guiltlessly, he imagined Usagi pinned beneath him. Her body was perfection against his, and their position afforded him the freedom to touch her as he pleased. With deliberate thrusts, he reveled in the euphoria on her expression as he took his own, plunging in and out of her soaking heat. And he kept going, perfectly demonstrating for her his stamina – resisting a hard release no matter how many times she seized around him each and every time she came. It was only when she whorled her lips around his name, with such undulating ecstasy did he allow himself to burst, and gloriously so.

"Oh, Kami! Usagi!" Trunks groaned loudly as he came, hurtling back to reality upon hearing what he had just spoken aloud.

"What, Trunks?" Hiyori asked saucily, wiping her wet lips with the back of her hand.

"Ahh, you know," the teen began hazily, trying to come up with something good even though his brain might as well have been Jell-O. "You're just, uh, cute like a bunny. Know what I mean?" He explained, almost sighing aloud at how ridiculously stupid that was.

"Oh, wow. That's so sweet, Trunks!" Hiyori giggled, "And that was so good, thank you." She continued, bringing forth her most alluring sultry gaze.

"Yeah," Trunks responded, and zoned out for a minute as an incredibly sobering feeling overcame him. It was great, wasn't it? What girl didn't want to throw herself at a person who had no feelings for her at all?

It wasn't often, but every once in a while Trunks found himself feeling empty after a random hookup, even with someone he knew. Occasionally, and very occasionally, the teen imagined what it would be like if he one day settled down with someone who loved him for simply being just who he was. Hearing the unwavering praise from the women who wanted him, even when he knew deep down it was for shallow reasons – he loved it. But sometimes, they weren't all that good at making it sound believable, and suddenly, Trunks remembered why the last time he had hooked up with Hiyori hadn't been that enjoyable.

After bidding her goodnight, and of course, promising to call sometime, Trunks took back to the road staring into the streets of Tokyo with a little disdain. Somehow, his rotten mood even after a blow job was Usagi's fault and he bitterly hoped he never saw that girl again.


Stuffing an unorganized bundle of papers into her bag, Usagi bid Ami goodnight and began walking home. She expelled a small sigh when she walked past the arcade, seeing that it had already closed. Even though she had gone there earlier that afternoon, it wasn't like she had a chance to play any video games! No, instead she had to wait around so she could meet Rei's big, dumb boyfriend.

Actually, Usagi had thought Goten was a really sweet and nice guy – it was that friend of his, Trunks, who had ruined her day!

Grumbling and sticking out her bottom lip in a pout, Usagi swung her arms angrily as she stormed toward her neighborhood. Casting her eyes downward at the sparkly little ring on her left hand, she narrowed her gaze. And what was wrong with her ring? It was everything she liked! It was pink and she loved pink! And it was heart shaped – what could possibly be a preferable shape to that?

"What a jerk," she muttered under her breath when without warning, her sailor communicator began to beep. Pausing near a sidewalk bench, she flipped open the screen and was greeted by an angry-looking Luna.

"Eh?" she queried which seemed to further infuriate the feline.

"Do you have any ideas how many times I've called you this afternoon? What if this had been official Guardian business?"

"Well, if it's not, then why are you calling me on here?" Usagi grumpily shot back. Luna grumbled a few Maurian curses under her breath, but seemed to shake the comment off upon returning back to the screen.

"It's your mother! She gave me the most pitiful amount of milk this evening, mumbling something or other about not going to the store until Sunday!"

"Well," Usagi responded with a lift of her brow, "Times are hard, ya know? Shingo has started on the fencing team now and since it's so expensive Mom has been an absolute beast about rationing groceries." And of course at the mention of food, her stomach loudly growled.

"That is absurd!"

"Well don't blame me, blame Shingo," she quipped and Luna sighed.

"Just pick up some on the way home, would you?" her advisor asked with exasperation. While Usagi hardly wanted to spend what was left of her weekly allowance on milk, she supposed it would be a good opportunity to pick up a pre-dinner snack.

"Fine, fine," Usagi agreed, eying a convenience store that was just up ahead. "But hey, before I let you go, can I ask you something?" she asked, continuing when the cat agreed. "Do you think it's alright that the engagement ring Mamoru bought me isn't a diamond?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you know," Usagi trailed, trying to think of the best way to put it. "I mean, it's very pretty, but don't you think he could have saved up for something a little bit more, uh, expensive?" Luna was quiet for several moments, so long that at first, the blonde thought she needed to further explain when suddenly, the speakers on her communicator nearly exploded.

"YOU LITTLE BRAT," Luna shrieked causing Usagi to throw her head back in shock, "YOU HAVE STAR CROSSED LOVE AND A HANDSOME PRINCE WHO WOULD GIVE HIS LIFE FOR YOU AND ALL YOU CAN THINK ABOUT IS-"

"Ok, ok!" The teen yelled back, groaning dramatically, "It was just a question, alright? Quit being so crabby. I'll bring you your milk, geez!"

After hanging up, Usagi walked into the store. Luna was absolutely right, and in truth, Usagi didn't care about anything like that at all. She had always loved her ring, so why was it that Trunks had made her feel so bad about it? He was nothing but a big jerk – a handsome jerk; she had to admit, but still a jerk.

With some quandary, Usagi settled on a small bag of cookies and after purchasing it as well as milk for Luna, she walked back outside only to see a large commotion occurring at the bank across the street.

"Grab her!" Someone yelled, and before Usagi could gather her wits about her, she was yanked by the arm and pulled along the sidewalk. Yelping at the other's grip, she looked on forlornly as the bottle of milk went shattering to the ground.

"Hey what's the big idea-" she turned to the offender, and went pale in the face upon finding a gun pointed between her eyes.

"Be quiet and do what we say, or else!" A scarily large man with a face covered by a ski mask ordered her. Like a deer in headlights, Usagi could only nod profusely in agreement when suddenly she was heaved over the man's shoulder.

"Got a hostage, let's move!" He barked to the two other's accompanying him, and without hesitation, they began bustling down the sidewalk with Usagi in tow.

"H-Hey!" the girl protested; pummeling a few fists into the man's back as he carried her away. "Put me down!"


As if his evening couldn't have become anymore irritating, Trunks ran into a patch of traffic on his way out of the city. Throwing his hands up into air in exasperation, he turned the radio to the traffic station. If he was going to be stuck there awhile, he was just going to pack up his car in a capsule and fly home as soon as he found a private place to take off. However, his attention flipped immediately upon hearing the reason behind the hold up.

"North 5th street is blocked off because of reports of gunshots and a possible hostage situation. Drivers are advised to stay in their cars until police clear up the incident."

Now, Trunks had absolutely no interest in pulling a crime fighter gig like Gohan, but after hearing that someone's life might be in danger, he did become a little concerned. And sure enough, Trunks focused his supernatural eyesight ahead of him and saw three masked thugs making their getaway on foot across traffic with the police hot on their tail. To his great surprise, carried by one, was a frantically flailing blonde girl with a very unique hair style.

"Is that…?" Trunk paused, his pupils constricting in disbelief. "Usagi?!" He bellowed, and for reasons he couldn't quite pinpoint, felt his blood begin to boil. "Oh, hell no." He ground out, and without a second's more hesitation, kicked open the driver's side door and took off after them.


"We've got you surrounded," a policeman ordered over a megaphone, and sure enough, the three thugs with poor Usagi were cornered. The schoolgirl knew if she could just steal away for a moment, she would be able to transform and kick these guy's sorry butts, but there was no way she was getting away with that under the prying gaze of the bank robbers and the police.

While being sloughed off the man's shoulder, she tried to pull away but watched helplessly as he stuck a bag of his contraband in her school bag and held onto her wrist like a vice.

"Back off, pigs!" Her kidnapper announced, as he yanked her against him and put the gun to her head. "Or the broad gets it!" Gritting her teeth, Usagi wriggled in the man's grasp and in her movement, she noticed a door that was cracked open in a building a few feet away. Reeling back her free arm, she shoved it as hard as she could into the man's crotch and made a break for it when he doubled over and released her in the process.

"Get her!" the injured man cried, "She's got the jewels!"

Usagi heard him, but didn't stop running as she raced through the hallway and found herself in the foyer of a mall that had closed a few hours ago. There were gunshots ringing outside, but upon turning to look over her shoulder, she squeaked when the three men were racing after.

"Get back here, girl!" One of them yelled and Usagi quickly raced up the escalator in desperation to find a place to transform. Upon reaching the bridge she scanned the area and was certain no one was there, quickly tossing her bag away she spoke the words and in a zip and flash of light, the pretty suited soldier Eternal Sailor Moon stood before the escalator where the men were now running up.

"Hey!" She pointed a gloved finger down to them and struck the pose that every villain she had faced in the past had come to recognize. "You should know very well it's wrong to steal, whether it is jewels or cute girls! So in the name of the Moon, I'm going to kick your sorry butts!"

"Holy shit, is that Sailor Moon?"

"Who cares, shoot her, boys!"

"Wait, wha-" Sailor Moon began, but squealed and began to run away when a spray of bullets blazed in her direction. "Eee-yah!" She wailed, diving behind a marble statue for cover when suddenly, she heard an ear splitting shatter and noticed a gaping hole in ceiling of the great glass dome overhead. Leaping back to her feet, the silhouette of a man stood between her and the gunmen. Her eyes widened in fear when they began to shoot, and she rushed to his aid only to stop and stare in amazement when the bullets bounced off of him and clattered to the tile. Wordlessly, the stranger suddenly flashed and in a blur he had disarmed all three men and knocked them unconscious in a heap on the ground. The Moon's famed warrior had to admit, this guy was pretty talented.

From downstairs, Moon could hear the echo of police radios approaching. It was way past her time to split the scene, but she felt like she should at least give her savior a 'thank you' before she disappeared into the night.

"Hey-" she began but paused when he turned around, dusting his hands together from his handiwork. Her mouth dropped open, only just slightly, before she clicked her teeth shut. That hair. That smile – the one that was so charming that it simply couldn't be real. And she knew it wasn't, but she also knew she couldn't call him on it without giving herself away.

"Sailor Moon," Trunks greeted her with a playful sparkle glinting in his light blue eyes, "I have to say, I've always been a fan. Not as much as my sister, though, she's had your poster in her room for a year now." Grasping her fists together, Sailor Moon was torn with her feelings. On one hand, this guy had completely insulted her, and on the other…

He had totally, totally just rescued her from a bad situation.

"Well then you know how it goes for us super heroines then," she explained, her voice cracking from trying to control her emotion. Taking a step backward, she raised an awkward hand as if to say goodbye. "I've gotta split, thanks again!" but just as she turned, she was called back by his voice.

"Hey Usagi, hold up, you forgot this." Pausing in her descent, she immediately remembered her messenger bag and whirled around to quickly retrieve it.

"Than-" she began, but the words died on her lips and her crystalline orbs widened in horror.

What had he just called her?

She stared at him, her face growing evermore red as she took in his appearance draped in the shadows of the darkened lobby. He held the strap of her bag dangling on the hook of his finger and that pleasant smile of his had transformed into something entirely different. He didn't say a word, but she could hear the dark chuckle hidden behind those perfect pearly whites. The corner of his lip had slid into a wicked smirk and the sailor soldier was served with no choice but to accept that he had won this little bout.

"Look," she hissed under her breath, darting her eyes to see that the police had now entered the building and were running toward the stairs, "We can talk later, but I really need my stuff, and I really need to get out of here."

Hearing him chuckle for the first time, she watched as he slung her bag over his body and moved to stand before her, his large, muscular frame dwarfing her own in comparison.

"Hey, relax," he told her quietly as the glint in his gaze became evermore mischievous. "I got this." The winged soldier's eyebrows knit together in confusion, but before she could register his movement she was whisked into his arms and they were rocketing through the skylight's broken window and into the sky.

She had screamed, but the sound had been lost in her lungs. Digging her fingers into the brawn of his shoulders, she met his gaze with her shockingly wide chasms, the tremble on her lips demanding an explanation without the need for the words to be spoken aloud.

"You've got a pretty interesting secret, don't you, Usagi?" Trunks asked; his voice full of laughter as he propelled them through the sky. "But would you look at that?" he continued as Usagi turned her eyes to the city below, torn between both fear and wonder.

"It looks like I do, too."


Authors Note: I finally updated this story! It was quite the delay but I can't even believe the response I got to the first chapter! I really hope this new installment is up to your liking. I hadn't planned on making this a full length story or anything really, but if it gets enough attention, I will! It's "Novel November" so I'm dedicating this month to writing. Let me know if I should keep this story on my list.

Thank you so very, VERY much to those who reviewed. I usually list everyone but it is 50+ names and kind of just want to keep writing while my muse is on fire, hahaha. (I still can't believe this story has this many reviews, omg I am seriously unworthy guys).

So how many people out there hate Trunks? I still love the guy but maaaaaaan, haha!

Anyway, thanks for reading. Y'all's words of kindness and criticism keep me going!

Love,

El3