Hey Guys-

Hey Guys-

Thanks to everyone who reviewed and to all of you HM readers who have decided to give me another shot after my long absence. We get to see Caspian's reaction to everything in this chapter. Enjoy!

The sun had set a half an hour earlier leaving the assembly area with the great tree blanketed in darkness.

The young king walked slowly around the empty meeting place that had been so full just hours before. Hours later he still couldn't believe everything that had happened in this place today. He did not know how to feel about it either. He relished the chance that Aslan had given those who wanted a new beginning in their lives but at the same time he felt resentful and cheated by the lion by the removal of his own hopes of a new beginning. The new king sat down on the stone wall and let his gaze fall unseeing to his hands a mixture of sadness and disappointment taking hold of his heart.

He had awoken that morning so excited and happy. Things had been going so well. His kingdom had been united and slowly his subjects were putting aside their deep seated fears and learning to embrace their new world.

He laughed to himself as he remembered how quickly he had dressed and gone to the dining hall of the great Telmarine castle. He had dressed carefully putting on the best tunic he had…one that he hoped would befit a king of Telmar….and one that he hoped SHE would notice on him.

Caspian lifted his head to look over Telmar at the thought of Queen Susan. He knew none of this would have been possible without her and her siblings. He would not now be king without them. And in their own way each had given him so much. Peter had taught him how to lead even in the face of immense adversity. Edmund had shown him bravery and selflessness and Lucy seemed to embody faith and love of all those around her. And yet the thing he had loved most about them was the sense of family. The 4 pevensie children seemed to be able to conquer anything as long as they were together and for the first time in his life Caspian had felt as if there might be a place for him in their midst.

He had known that his uncle had never truly cared for him but having been deprived of his parents since he was very young he had forgotten what true affection and caring had felt like…until he met them….and until he had seen her.

Susan. She had stirred feelings inside of him that he hadn't known existed. He had never met a more beautiful, strong and amazing woman and everything inside of him was mourning the loss of her presence. He had thought that seeing her dangling many stories above Alsan's How was the most terrifying thing he had experienced but watching her walk away from him…from everything he was feeling for her was excruciating.

They had spent the days after the battle slowly getting to know each other, Caspian talking of his fears at ruling so many people fairly and Susan assuring him that what he was feeling was completely normal. Caspian had shown her his castle and the city he lived in and he had never taken more pride in what the Telmarines could be then when talking and showing them to Susan. And in those days they had grown even closer. The long looks that they had shared with each other during the days of the battle hadn't ceased but they were now accompanied by soft touches and rapid heart beats. During the battles Susan would often find ways to take herself away from the princes disarming looks but since they had arrived she would hold his gaze and Caspian knew both of them were getting quite lost in each other.

And then he had seen those beautiful blue eyes frozen in sadness as she walked with the great lion and he knew everything was about to change. He had wanted to go to her and ask her what was wrong but he couldn't. He had no right. As much as he relished those long glances and the rush of his heart as he held her hand in his neither of those things would merit embracing her and comforting her in front of her brother and Aslan. And so he had walked away… and as a consequence he didn't know if the crushing feeling in his chest would ever go away.

Suddenly a cloaked figure appeared in the darkness.

Caspian quickly stood and withdrew the small sword that he carried with him for protection. Immediately a line of mice appeared out of nowhere.

"Stop and declare yourself or prepare to draw swords with the knights of Narnia!" Reepicheep shouted.

The cloaked figure stopped and uncovered its head revealing a beautiful young woman with golden hair. She smirked at the mouse in front of her.

Caspian let out the breath he had been holding and dropped his sword knowing that although he would live through this encounter it would probably not be a pleasant one.

"It is alright Reepicheep. She's mostly harmless." Caspian said sheathing his sword again. The mice bowed and left the two Telmarines alone.

The woman laughed. "Well who in their right mind would want to be completely harmless?" The woman asked with laughter in her voice.

Caspian let out a frustrated breath. "Is there something you want Amara?"

Amara pretended to examine her fingernails as if the question bored her. "I don't want anything. I had just heard that you made a complete fool of yourself today and figured you might need someone to help you figure out what you did wrong."

Caspian scoweled at her and in his most kingly voice replied softly. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Amara strode up to the wall the king had been sitting on and looked out. "Well my good for almost nothing brother tells me that you may have let queen Susan disappear right in front of your eyes and did absolutely nothing about it." She replied with an air of indifference.

Caspian looked over at her furrowing his dark eyes. "And what does that matter. She's a queen… she can go anywhere she likes."

Amara's eyes darkened looking for the first time since meeting very serious. "It matters because this same brother thinks you might be falling for this woman….and that my dear prince makes every bit of difference!" Amara finished with fire in her voice.

Caspian looked at his hands again. He knew she was right he had just hoped no one had noticed what an idiot he had been. But then again he had never been able to put something over Amara or her brother.

Letting out a sigh he turned to her. "Just in case you missed it. They made me King of Telmar so be careful who you call "prince" around here. And secondly I just met her. How on earth am I supposed to fall for someone I just met?"

Amara looked at him out of the corner of her eyes. "Who is it that you're trying to convince? Me or You? Either way though you'd still be in denial. I may not have been there this afternoon but I saw the way the two of you looked at each other and no one could deny that there were strong feelings there. And as to your beloved title…A true KING of Telmar would not be afraid to tell someone how he felt about them." She spoke softly but with conviction.

Caspian let out a huge frustrated breath. "Alright…do you want to hear me say it? Fine! I was an absolute idiot! I heard that she was leaving and I stood there like a fish out of water with my mouth hanging open! I couldn't SAY anything! Then when she's coming over to say goodbye ALL I could say to her was that I wished we had more time together. WHO says that? I'll tell you who…idiot kings who can't get their mouths to work properly!" Caspian kicked a stone on the ground to accentuate his frustration.

Amara turned around to face the king with a giant grin on her face. "Well it seems that your mouth is working just fine now so at least we know it's not a mechanical problem."

Caspian just glared at her and then lifted his eyebrows and smirked at her. "You do realize that if you keep giving me trouble I have an entire army at my disposal. I doubt very much that anyone would truly miss you." He said with a small smile lining his handsome features.

Amara leaned back with her elbows against the wall smiling back. With anyone else this type of banter would have been considered flirting but with Caspian it had always been her way to verbally spar with her old friend. "Is it true she kissed you?"

The effect on his features was immediate. His eyes lost focus slightly as he stared out into space. She could see him replaying it in his mind. He nodded with a slight blush to his features. "Yes….And if it hadn't knocked me so completely senseless I might have had more of a chance to respond. What kind of a king will I be if I can't even keep my composure around a pretty girl?"

Amara hopped away from the wall coming closer to Caspian. "Well I must say you do a fine job keeping your composure together around me so we must assume it is this particular pretty girl that gives you problems. And now that we know the source of the problem we can work on it for future reference," Amara finished with an authoritative and take charge air.

Caspians nearly black eyes darkened and he turned away from his friend. "There won't be a next time." He said in almost a whisper. "She's gone…for good."

To Amara the pain in his voice was evident. She had never seen her friend worked up this much about anything. Although she hadn't been at the assembly she had met the queen when Aslan had crowned Caspian and it was obvious to her that both the monarchs had strong feelings for one another even though they had both tried to hide it. Caspian had always been handsome and caught the eyes of many women in the country but none of them had understood him. They all thought of how wonderful it would be to stand next to the handsome future king of Telmar but none realized how painful and lonely such a thing could be… but Susan understood it all. She had fought along with him and both had watched as soldiers who trusted them died at the hands of their enemy. They both understood the pain that came with such responsibility and both humbly gave themselves to serving others knowing how much was riding on their decisions.

Their reluctance to show each other how they felt was another reason they were so perfect for one another. Both Caspian and Susan had gone through times where things they had loved had been taken away from them and both guarded their hearts because of it.

In essence Susan was every bit Caspian's equal and Amara did not know if he would find anyone who would fill those holes in his heart as Susan was starting to.

Amara walked over to Caspian so that they were nearly touching. She could see him trying to hold back tears. She reached up and placed both hands on his heart. "All I know is that Aslan said that Susan had learned everything that Narnia could teach her." She stood on tiptoes and looked pointedly in Caspians deep dark eyes. "Maybe this separation wasn't meant to teach her anything."

Caspian's wide dark eyes now met hers with stunned fascination.

He stumbled over his next words trying to wipe away the tears that had been ready to escape his eyes. "You mean….you think this was done to teach me?" Caspian asked with hope lining his features.

Amara sighed. "I am not Aslan but I do know from our studies with Cornelius that people rarely understand what is really being asked of them when they see and speak to Aslan. It is only after things have run their course that they see his true purpose. I also know that if these feelings are as strong as I think they are that they are worth fighting for."

Amara placed pressure back against his heart "As long as you still feel Susan here..I don't think she has truly left for good."

Caspian's head bent down in thought and sadness. "How can I fight for something that is unreachable? And how do I know that I'm not just setting myself up for disappointment holding onto these feelings? What if she never comes back?"

Amara stepped away from the king. "Those are the questions that are at the essence of love AND faith. And maybe that is exactly what you are meant to be learning through this. You don't have an easy road ahead of you but you have the best heart I have ever known….and it is time that you trusted in it and yourself. If your heart tells you to let her go then I would do that….if not…..embrace it."

Caspian looked at her again. In a soft unsure voice he said "I never said that what I felt was love."

Amara looked at her friend over her shoulder and with a slight sadness she replied. "You didn't have to."

And with that Amara walked away from him leaving his head and his heart searching for answers. He knew his heart would hold onto his feelings for Susan as long as he breathed. He also knew he would somehow fight for these feelings and would not give up his hope.

He looked over at Amara's retreating form and chuckled. He had been right. This meeting had not been easy but even now he could feel himself recovering from the pain he had let consume him. If Susan did coming back to his life he would owe her BIG for this and he knew she would never let him forget it.

He looked up at the stars and thanked Aslan for all those in his life that could bring him pain but show him the way to happiness.

He walked away from their meeting with love of his friendship with Amara deep in his heart and his love of a different kind for Susan giving him the strength to carry on.

PLEASE REVIEW!! I'm begging! You never know maybe if you review enough stories the powers that be will take pity on you and grant your hearts desire…For me I'm thinking Ben Barnes on a beach bringing me drinks and chocolate. A girl can dream right?

CHEERS