Chapter 2 - More to Lose
There was nothing and then she opened her eyes. It was like she blinked and now a new day had begun. She simply starred at the wall...the wall? She rolled onto her back and looked around for a moment. She couldn't find it in herself to panic. Somehow she knew that she was safe where she was. Then she heard the flap move and someone walk in.
"Kaede," it was but a whisper that fell slowly from her lips.
The old woman set the wood in the corner and walked over to Kagome. She swept the bangs from her face and softly rested her hand on her cheek.
"I am sorry child."
Kagome looked into her old eyes and for the first time since knowing her she knew everything behind them. The pain and suffering the world had bestowed on her was given to Kagome ten times over. She leaned into her hand needing the touch of anything familiar. Her eyebrows pushed together and she squeezed her eyes shut.
"Oh Kaede," her voice wavered and cracked.
Suddenly she was crying again. It was as if she hadn't allowed herself to cry in years, when in reality she only stopped crying for a few hours as she slept. She wanted to hide in the warmth of her embrace, but couldn't find the energy to move. She simply wept and Kaede kept her hand where it lay allowing her other hand to come up and slowly smooth the child's hair.
The old woman could not even begin to imagine the horrors that occurred during the battle. She tried her best to keep the villagers calm and fight off any demons that came looking for an easier kill. It felt like eternity, but finally she felt it. She felt a calm that seemed to sweep over the land. He was gone. She fell to her knees and wept for sister, but slowly her tears turned to ones of happiness. Eventually, she found the energy to walk to the battle field. What she saw there she could never truly un-see.
Blood. Blood was everywhere and on everything. Body parts, entrails, bones, and things she could not even name. She saw Miroku's body and knew that his death had been drawn out by the look on his face. Not even in death had he found peace it would seem. She searched for any other bodies, but found none. They were gone, that was obvious, but they would never have a proper burial. A cool breeze swept through the land as if the earth were trying to clean this wretched mess.
She felt tears falling, but couldn't register herself crying. They were all so young and beautiful. They lived mostly dark, tortured lives. They fought for any happiness that might have fallen into their laps. Even now, as they removed the worst evil from the world, they never found happiness in this life. However, they had do so willingly. They gladly ran into battle for revenge; either for themselves or others. Especially her, dear Kagome. The girl had fallen into their laps, stayed with them out of honor first then out of love, and she had taken on their tragedy as if it were her own. She had given everything when she could have easily walked away and none would have ever blamed her. But, no, she couldn't walk away. The girl had to see things set right.
Just then her eyes landed on her body. Tears overwhelmed her as she registered the pool of blood under the girl. She took a small step toward her, but came up short. she didn't want to know that the girl was dead. She certainly didn't want to know why the poor girl was shirtless. Just then she noticed a movement...was she...crying? A sob broke through the clearing and Kaede's heart was almost overwhelmed by the pain in her sob to actually feel the joy at finding the girl alive.
She ran as fast as her old bones could carry her to the girls side. She noticed then that she was asleep, but seemed unharmed. "But...the blood?" She whispered to herself.
"Inu...yasha, please..." her voice almost didn't make it to the old miko's ear.
Kaede felt a gust of wind hit her face just as Kagome's words found her ears. She couldn't help wondering if the moon had sent the wind simply to bring the child's message to her. Then it hit her. All that blood wasn't just the girls, but Inuyasha's. His body was nowhere to be found. The girl had watched him die. She stood there for a moment afraid to move. She wanted Kagome to be alive, but knew that she couldn't be okay. Devastations such as these last a lifetime.
Slowly, she bent down and touched her shoulder gently. However, Kagome gave no response. On the contrary, she closed her eyes tighter.
"Oh child what shall I do with ye?"
With some persuasion, and a few threats, she managed to force a village man to help her carry Kagome to her home. He barely kept down his dinner as he registered all the blood that was now smearing all over him from the girl. She was like a living corpse in his arms. Kaede pointed to the mat in the corner of her hut and the man practically threw Kagome to the floor and fled the hut. Kaede had no idea why he reacted so violently to a sleeping woman. Then she noticed something in Kagome's hand.
"Why..." was all she could get out.
She didn't even want to think of why the jewel was still in this world. Surely, someone made a selfless wish thus destroying it. She assumed that it would simply turn to dust or disappear, but it seemed that it only lost its power. Her curiosity nearly overwhelmed her, but she knew that even should she wish it, she would not get a word out of the child for some time. Even now that the child was awake and acknowledging her she could not find it in herself to ask the girl what happened. All that mattered in that moment was that the war was over and that evil was gone simply because one small woman fell down a well and landed in the past.
"Rest child," she softly demanded.
She moved quickly about the hut gathering water and a cloth. She returned to Kagome's side and started cleaning the blood from her body. Kagome choose then to speak again.
"Everyone is gone...they are all Dead," she whispered it and yet her eyes were boring holes into the old woman.
"I kno..."
"Do you? You weren't there! There was no peace in their end. They didn't even get to see him die...all they knew was that he tortured them until their last breath...he WON!"
Kaede couldn't think of anything to say. She had no comfort to give the girl. All she could do was stare at her wild black hair and her wide tortured eyes. There were things behinds those eyes that Kaede never wanted to know about. She was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn't notice Kagome getting up. The girl moved with an energy that she never had when she was healthy and happy. It was as if sorrow energized in her ways happiness never could. The need to run away from her pain was simply too great. The old woman didn't have the heart to try to stop her. She had earned her right to decided what her life becomes now and Kaede would not stand in the way.
And so Kagome ran. She sprinted through Inuyasha's forest with speed she didn't think a human could posses. She assumed a grace that she never had before as she avoided every stub, branch and rock on the forest floor. She had to get away from this place...this time. She couldn't be happy about having at least one loved person alive because she only reminded Kagome of the ones who died. She didn't register the tiny cuts forming all over her exposed torso as she ran. Her blood felt like fire in her veins and her chest was going to explode, but still she ran. She needed to go back to her time; she deserved the peace of her own time. She burst through the trees and her eyes landed on the well. Then suddenly she stopped.
"What if..." she couldn t finished the statement.
She was terrified that the well would not take her back. She had the jewel, but it was powerless. It seemed very clear that it was only because the power of the jewel that Kagome was allowed to travel back and forth. Would it really force her to stay in the wrong time after she had sacrificed so much to it's purpose?Her burst of adrenaline suddenly disappeared as she fell to her knees.
She felt him their at the very edge of the clearing opposite of her. She couldn't bring herself to care. She HOPED he would just kill her. She kept her eyes down as she fought to catch her breath. Her entire body was trembling and he thought it was because she was scared. After everything she had been through the fact that she could still visibly feared him pet his ego in a way he wished it didn't. Was he always such a vain creature he thought to himself quickly. He shook the thoughts from his head and focused on the girl. The fool was half naked, more than usual, with only a small odd black cloth covering her breasts. She had practically saved the world and now she left herself vulnerable to the pathetic human man who was currently leering at her from the shadows. He did not want to waste his time saving her life, but knew that she had deserved at least that. However, he waited to make sure the man would actually do something; he would not soil his hands for nothing.
For a moment her curiosity peaked as she wondered why he seemed to be just standing there...watching her. Her thoughts came to an abrupt stop when she heard someone rushing toward her. She turned her head just in time to see a man tackling her body to the ground. She was too shocked to realize what was happening as her body was roughly pinned down by what seemed to be a very large man. He was straddling her body as he somehow managed to pin her hands above her head. All she could do was lie there speechless. Could this seriously be happening to her right now?
"You are practically begging for it. I saw my brother carrying you and knew I had to have you," he leaned close to her face revealing very yellow teeth.
"... " she just stared bug eyed at him.
"Oh a quite one I see. Don't worry I will make you scream nice and loud for me," with that he leaned forward and slowly ran his tongue up her neck.
At this point she simply ignored his disgusting, sweaty hands and tried to imagine herself elsewhere. She was tired of fighting everything that this life seemed to want to throw at her. Maybe he would kill her when he was done. He used his left hand to hold both of her and slowly slid his right down her arm. The moment it landed on her breast she froze.
"My...shirt..." suddenly her mind rewound to the moment she ripped it off.
She had never even thought to replace it and couldn't even find it in her to be mad at Kaeda for forgetting such a detail as well; the woman couldn't have anticipated her running away the moment she awoke.
"Don't tell me you forgot to dress yourself!" He was practically laughing at her.
His laughter was harsh, more like a cackle. She bucked her hips trying to remove his weight as it was currently pushing her body into several rocks.
"OH I like that," he huskily whispered as he ground his groin into her.
That simple movement made her suddenly aware of the reality of the situation. Her breathing sped up and her mind started to panic. His hands were going to far south for her liking. Then she froze as she felt his hand slide under the band of her skirt. She was afraid to move. Her mind was suddenly blank again and she tried to escape reality completely. Fate had no mercy for her and she would not willingly witness what was about to happen to her. She had had enough of remembering every painful event that occurred in her life. She was too tired to fight physically, but she would use all she had left to escape this without a single memory of it.
"Oh don't be scared you will like this ve..."
"Piece of human filth," he spat at the man as his claws tightened around the man's throat.
That voice. She didn't even notice the loss of the man's weight on her until that voice broke through her mental cage. That icy, emotionless, deep voice. It could only belong to one man...but...why on earth was he saving her?
"You wonder why I despise you things."
"Let...go," he somehow managed to choke out.
She couldn't seem to move from her position. She could only stare at the sky and hope that soon he would kill her and get it over with.
"Silence," those were his last words as he gave a quick squeeze.
There was a loud cracking noise and the man was dead. He let his body drop to ground like a ton of bricks next to Kagome. Death it would seem was a rather consistent theme in her life as of late. She looked at the now lifeless man and couldn't help, but feel responsible as she starred into his lifeless eyes. She couldn't look away from his lifeless eyes. She had seen this look on so many that she loved and hated. She could not feel remorse and yet she in no way felt satisfied by his death.
"Fool." He spoke again and she couldn't stop herself.
She let her head turn further until her eyes landed on him.
"Why do you put yourself at such risk?" Just then she locked her eyes with his.
He found himself unable to breathe. Those eyes would haunt him for the rest of his days. There were dark bags under her once youthful eyes. He remembered the spark that she once held in those eyes and couldn't fight a chill as he registered the obvious loss of life in her. There was pain, anguish, behind those eyes that he had never seen nor felt. The girl wanted to die.
"Why not?"
"He would have happily raped you."
"Everything has been taken from me," her voice cracked at the end as her eyes filled with tears. "Why not...that too?"
He was speechless. Her sorrow radiated from her tainting her scent. During previous encounters he couldn't help, but notice her pungent scent. Often times he would be momentarily distracted by the smell of citrus. There were times she smelt like spring; fresh and crisp. Her scent was stronger then most which he found strange, but could never bring himself to dislike the fact. At least she didn't smell as disgusting as the rest of her kind. Now, her scent was almost lost under the smell of death and sadness. Simply put the women smelt like a graveyard soaked in tears.
"Will you not kill me?"
His eyebrows shot up, but his face gave no other indication of his surprise.
"You hate me don t you? I have forced you to soil your hands with that man," her voice seemed broken and so...lifeless.
"Do not flatter yourself to think that I was forced to save your life. You have done enough to be saved from such a disgusting crime."
She was too drained too be shocked by his words and she found herself simply saying, "Oh."
He was becoming rather unnerved by the way she refused to look away. He was certain the woman hadn't even blinked. It was like she was trying to figure him out or rather how to get him to kill her.
"You truly wish to die." It wasn't a question.
His only reply was the falling of tears from one eye then the next. She hadn't even blinked the tears simply overflowed passed her lashes. She was the physical embodiment of pain. There was something deep inside of him that wanted to protect her if only to repay her for the sacrifices she made for a world that he must also clam as his own. He assumed that Rin's influence over the years had something to do with this.
"You are much to useful to waste that way."
"Use...ful?"
"Yes. I must admit that your power is...impressive to say the least."
"So...you are going to use me?" Up until this point she was still on the ground.
Now she was sitting up staring at him.
"Why not?" He asked as he noticed her movements and hoped that she had some fight left in her.
As if it had never left, a spark appeared in her eyes. He had upset her enough it would seem.
"That sounds familiar." She spoke slowly as her hands balled into fists.
"Then you should be used to it," he purposely let the sarcasm bleed into his voice.
He needed to know that there was life somewhere in her still.
"Go to hell." There was plenty of life left or at least enough to get her killed.
"Watch your mouth girl."
She jumped to her feet and took a step toward him, "I've had enough! Either kill me or fuck off!"
He almost wanted to laugh, but chose another route all together. Kagome found herself pinned to a tree by her throat within seconds. He wanted to kill her, but knew that he couldn't allow himself to do it. He would settle for terrifying her.
"Watch your mouth human," he was practically growling.
She felt his breath on her face and the pressure on her throat and yet she didn't fear him. He saw the pronounced lack of fear in her eyes and tightened his grip. She WOULD fear him. However, when he did she simply closed her eyes and relaxed into his grip. She showed no fear, not even nervousness, when he could so easily end her in moment. He stepped away from her and let her fall to the ground before he lost control and ripped her hear off. She was never normal, but now she seemed...
"You are broken." His words were so simple and yet the cut through her.
She was broken. She had no idea how to fix herself and she honestly didn't know if she cared to fix herself. She sat there a moment before looking straight into his eyes.
"I know," she whispered for his ears only.
He couldn't think of anything to say. Luckily for him she wasn't finished.
"I'm alone, they are all dead...how is someone supposed to fix that?" Her eyes moved to stare at the ground.
He knew this answer all to well, "Settle for being alive and content with what you have."
She looked back at him, "What if you have nothing?"
He hated how weak she seemed and how...familiar her pain was to him. He turned to walk away, but he couldn't stop himself from giving the worthless woman some advice.
He looked over his shoulder at her and coldly stated, "You learn what nothing really means."
Her head shot up and her eye brows were lost in her bangs. She honestly didn't know whether to be mad or sad or terrified at the thought that she could have less than she did at that moment. Was he simply unaware of the full extent of her loss or did he just not care or worse...was he right? Was there something worse than this?
Authors Note: Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I feel like maybe i lost some steam lol but oh well!
