It had been half an hour and Nathan still hadn't returned from the bathroom. I had heard the water running to signal that he was taking a shower and I began to doubt that he would ever come out. I decided I would give him to calm down without having to see me so I quickly scribbled a note to him and left it on the pillow on his side of the bed before making the bed, gathering my clothes and leaving.

I'm sorry for everything. I hope I see you soon. Hales x

As I walked from his apartment, I couldn't hold back the tears I had been holding in ever since Nathan had confronted me. I too, had been questioning why I was with Lucas when I didn't have the kind of relationship with him that I longed for. Lucas had been my male best friend since the age of three; it was only when we met Peyton and Brooke that I grew closer to Brooke, who became my best friend.

Lucas was ideal on paper, he was clever, good looking, he never failed to make me laugh, but I never got butterflies when I was around him and I didn't see those fireworks when we kissed. I thought maybe it was because people had exaggerated this whole being in love thing, but when Nathan had touched me, I got shivers all over my body, I couldn't keep my breathing under control and I sure as hell couldn't control myself.

I decided against hailing a cab, deciding I would rather have time to think on my own in the peace of Tree Hill with the streets being completely deserted. I decided to walk to the park where Luke and I first met and sat upon the swing where Lucas had first seen me. Granted, when he saw me I wasn't actually on the swing, I was on my ass under the swing after falling off. We instantaneously became best friends after he defended me when Rachael called me an ugly duckling, which at the age of three made me bawl my eyes out. Since then Luke had always been looking out for me. He had protected me from boys since I first started to mature, and in return I protected him from any desperate or slaggy girls.

Lucas and Brooke had dated briefly in our sophomore year of high school, but that was non-stop drama because at the time the wild Brooke Davis didn't want to be in a serious relationship and was more after a 'friends with benefits' situation. Lucas was never that kind of guy, being raised by Karen had given him a traditional outlook on life and relationships, and called it off with Brooke. Since then, Lucas had always said he wished he could have a relationship with a nice girl who he shared a lot in common with but it wasn't until our 3rd year at Duke that Luke and I had got together. It had been roughly 18 months since we had first got together. The early days were great and we still had good times, they were just less frequent than what they had been in the beginning. I assumed it was because of the stress that Lucas was under, with writing his second book and Ravens possibly being made into a movie; I couldn't blame him for having a shorter fuse than usual.

I smiled at the memory, I smiled at the majority of the other memories me and Luke had shared, we had never been able to stay angry at each other for too long. With Luke it was easy, we continued to act like we did when were best friends plus everything that comes with a relationship. I never felt like I had to put effort into my relationship with him, or that I had to make myself look amazing every day in order to please him. With Nathan, it was the complete opposite.

Nathan had always had a reputation of being a ladies man, of having dated a million girls, though not dated in the same sense as what me and Luke are dating, I meant Nathan had taken many girls out on a date, or he was known for hooking up with girls at parties. Nathan and I had never shared the type of relationship that Luke and I have, Nathan was always with the popular crowd in High School, although we saw each other on occasions. From the first time, or before, Nathan had always made me nervous. But I knew that the one thing that accompanied Nathan was drama, and I couldn't deal with that, not after things being so easy with Luke.

I walked to the River Court, where me and Lucas spent most of our afternoons after school and weekends. Back before we had met Brooke and Peyton, it was just me and the boys; Skills, Junk, Fergie and Mouth. I walked to the tree by the waterfront where we had carved in our names and then underneath where Lucas had drawn our names with 'BFF' underneath it. I traced my fingers over the lines, yearning for Lucas to act the same with me now as he had back then. Wishing I was the only girl that he could look at in that way, I mean, I wasn't blind, I had seen him look at the odd girl when we were out together, but chose to brush it off assuming it was something all men did. Nathan looked at girls all the time, but the other night, his eyes hadn't left me. STOP IT HALEY.

I made it back to mine and Brooke's apartment, throwing myself down on my bed after changing into my pyjamas. I closed my eyes willing myself to sleep, however it was not happening. I decided I needed to talk to one of them in order to stop my brain from stressing out so much. I got my phone from my bedside table and typed:

"I'm sorry for what happened, I want to sort this out. Can I meet you at some point? H x"

I sent the message before shutting my phone off and letting sleep overtake me.