If Susan uttered any honest words once she was awakened by the Stag, they were these: I am such a fool sometimes. As she fought her dress from the trees that gripped it she knew these words were true for it had been foolish to come here, to follow the silly stag, and to ever have forgotten Narnia. Susan let time pass while she was in England; she let it slip through her fingers and fly into endless nights while she wasted her years trying to be the grown up that she supposed she should be. What foolish clothes she wore to all the pointless parties she attended mattered little to her now that her red dress became tangled with low hanging branches. She tugged at it, but it was useless for she was stuck unless she removed the dress all together. She did not want to go wandering about a forest without some sort of clothing, but it seemed she had no choice. Susan felt helpless as she pulled at her dress with all the strength she had, but saw that the branches refused to even bend. Sweat ran down her forehead, and her hands ached. She had received several scratches from the sharp leaves, and she would've liked to sit for a while and rest, but she could not move: she was completely stuck. I am such a fool sometimes, she thought as she tugged once more at her dress.
"Susan,"
The resounding whisper filled the air. She looked to the Stag, but it shook its head.
"Susan,"
Lucy's voice sounded as clear to Susan as if Lucy had been standing next to her, watching her struggle for her dress.
"Su, have a little faith…" Lucy said, and her voice faded into the wood.
Susan laughed a little. Something she always forgot was the one thing that could help her now: faith. She must've looked ridiculous with half her dress wrapped around a few branches, but she didn't care. The White Stag walked over to her, bent his head, and pulled Susan's dress loose. She placed her hand on him to thank him; for she could not talk through the waves of laughter that poured out of her like a waterfall, or a river.
Further in the wood Susan could hear a deep roar as her laughter became giggles, and then soft chuckling. The Stag looked at her once before flying off into the shady wood where the roaring could be heard. Susan followed, though she knew not that she could fly too, like the Stag. In a short while she was beside him, and so she ran faster, and faster until she could recognize no trees for everything was a blur of green, though up ahead a shining blue color drew her in. The Stag splashed in a wonderful lake, and Susan followed as the roaring became louder. The water was cool, like shade on a sunny day. She looked to the sky and saw a waterfall. She wondered what was beyond, for no one could climb to the top of Cauldron Pool. The Stag, while Susan admired the diamond clear water falling, continued to swim deeper into the lake, and when Susan noticed she swam after it…and up. Up, up, and further in she swam. Soon Susan could look down and see that she was swimming up the waterfall, but instead of questioning how this was possible she laughed a big belly laugh until she reached the top.
Susan struggled, but once on dry land she looked at herself. He dress was not ripped, but a much more beautiful red than before. Her hair was dry once again, the gold circlet sat upon her head, and her cuts and bruises were healed, and no one would ever know that they had been there in the first place. Even more amazing than all of this was her family, standing around Aslan and smiling. Lucy rushed to her, and hugged her. Susan hugged her as hard as she could to make up for all the missed days and nights when she would've liked to have hugged her, and she told her how much she had truly missed her, and them. Edmund and Peter approached her as well and hugged her, too. They were all dressed in royal clothing, and were all wearing crowns like in the Old days of Narnia, when they ruled. But something was different. A feeling that wasn't there before hung over all of them in the silence as they hugged. They could appreciate each other now, because each knew that living, or dying, without the others meant not really living, or dying, whole. It meant missing a part of you, like missing an ear: it was not really needed, but it made you feel better having it and when you didn't, you'd constantly check to see if it was there and when you realized it wasn't you'd feel bereft. There was nothing for the brothers and sisters to say, and there was nothing to do but hug and smile, or sigh their relief. Once they were together, Aslan stepped forward. Lucy, Peter, and Edmund let go of Susan slightly, though they kept their arms around her for they dared not lose her again. Aslan smiled at seeing them together once again, and licked Susan's face.
"Welcome, Dear one, to my country. There are many things we must talk about. Come along now," Aslan said serenely. Peter, Edmund, and Lucy felt uncomfortable letting Susan go when they wished to talk to her, and be with her, but they let her walk away with Aslan. The Great Lion knew they must talk a great deal, but he let her turn to say a few words to her siblings.
"I'll be back in a little while. Then we can stay up as long as we like and talk. Though…though I'd like to apologize for trying to be so grown-up before," Susan said, looking mainly at Lucy, "I hope you can forgive me."
Susan turned back to Aslan, and heard Edmund saying something about forgiving her after she had danced with them. Aslan and Susan walked a short while in silence before Susan dared to say a word. Then she cleared her throat and spoke.
"I'm…home now. Thank You," She hesitated, and the Great Lion said nothing. "But really, you must explain what the shadows in the wood were," The Lion was remained quiet for he felt Susan was struggling to say something that she thought important. "I'm also sorry, but you know I never forgot you. I just said it to try to make Narnia go away. I wanted it not to have happened because I'd miss it so much, and I knew I couldn't go back…"
They walked in silence once more, but Susan could hear the life of a party taking place not too far from them: laughing, dancing, talking, and singing.
Aslan swished his tail and he began to talk.
"The shadows in the wood were us, here in my country. You were passing through the Lands of Shadow, and from here Peter spotted you. They called out and tried to reach you. In your world you no longer exist—you've died. And so, little one, you've come here to rest at last and make amends for your mistake."
"But Aslan, why does this look like Narnia?" Susan thought she already knew the answer, but wanted to ask despite the feeling she had that Aslan would ask her what she thought. She wasn't wrong, for a moment later the Lion did ask. "Well, my guess is that you made Narnia like your country, only it was just a copy so it could not be as beautiful."
"Yes, I made Narnia a copy of my country, and England as well. You ought to know that your mother and father would like you to visit soon. But come now, we have much to talk about and already the sun is setting."
Indeed the sun was setting. It cast golden light around them that penetrated the trees in places, leaving it dappled with splashes of gold. The leaves on the trees turned a pale, but sparkly, green. The flowers turned gold entirely. The trunks of the trees ceased to be brown as they were washed in golden light, and the grass turned yellow. The sky turned pink, purple, red, orange, and the slightest shade of turquoise, though Susan could not easily see it through the leaves above. She watched until it all faded to a deep blue as the sun slid behind the horizon. Then she turned to walk once more with Aslan.
Susan and Aslan did not return in time for the party, or in time for breakfast. During late afternoon they slowly climbed the wooden stairs which wound around and up to a clearing in which the party had been held. The streamers and banners had been cleared away from the stairway the previous night to let the flowers decorate instead. Once up in the clearing Susan spotted a few fauns preparing a table, and setting food upon it. To her right Susan saw a pack of dogs eating a late breakfast on a mossy table. She watched them a while but they did not linger. The dogs, once done eating, disappeared into the wood beyond the half-moon clearing.
A faun called out to Susan. He asked her to come and eat. Then he quickly excused himself and scampered off after the dogs. The rest of the fauns left Susan in the same manner: they said various pleasant words about having her back, and then quickly excused themselves and left her at her table quite alone. Aslan had disappeared, but Susan had not noticed until that moment when a sudden quiet came over the clearing.
She sat with her hands on her lap, unsure of what to do. What was she supposed to do with all the food? On the table sat huge mountains of food: scrambled eggs, buttered toast, French toast, bits of bacon, fried ham, soft biscuits, sweet fruits, fluffy pancakes, toasted waffles, fresh bagels, cornbread, warm croissants, glazed doughnuts (much to Susan's surprise), blueberry muffins, potato cakes, oatmeal porridge, hash browns, and a stack of sausages. There were also jugs of different fruit juices of which Susan could identify the orange juice and the apple juice. Then there were the jugs filled with other substances: water, milk, and flower tea (fauns are very famous for their flower tea).
"Su, dig in!" Peter's voice came from behind her. She turned in surprise and found that not only Peter had been watching her, but Lucy, Edmund, and her parents were also there. She laughed as they took their places around the table and helped themselves to whatever they wanted. They smiled as they ate and began to talk to her like in the old days. She was finally home.
