Well this is the next chapter! Let me know what you guys think... presenting Bed Wed or Dead :)
When James had finally managed to calm down his girlfriend, the eight friends decided to start.
"So who starts?" Frank asked, even though everyone knew the answer.
Sure enough, Sirius yelled, "ME!" James couldn't help but think he oddly resembled a banshee.
Sirius grinned, the kind of grin that spelled trouble. His eyes twinkled as he glanced at Lily, who looked back rather warily.
"Lily Flower!" Sirius said excitedly. "Bed Wed Dead, Peter, Remus, Peter and I."
Lily groaned. Why did all three have to be in the same room as her? "Er…" Truth was she wanted to kill Peter. But not wanting to hurt his feelings she said, "I'd kill you—
"Hey!"
"—because you're a prat. I'd bed Remus and marry Peter." Without giving everyone a chance to react she said, "Peter! McGonagall, Sprout, and Binns."
Peter choked as the rest of the room cracked up. "Hurry up Pete," Sirius said. "If you take more than a minute, you have to give reasons for your answers." Peter's eyes got wide as tried to do some fast thinking.
"But Binns is a ghost!" he protested. Lily just shrugged.
"One minute is up!" Sirius announced. "Now you need to give reasons!"
Peter drooped further into his chair as everyone waited. Finally he said, "Kill Binns, just because he's a guy and that's wrong. Er, marry Sprout because she's nice and bed McGonagall." He cringed as he said this, hiding his face while everyone cracked up.
"How'd you kill a ghost if he's already dead?" Sirius asked. Everyone ignored him.
"Right so, Marlene," Peter said as the laughter died down. "Snape, Yaxley and Dolohov."
Marlene looked outraged. "But they're all Slytherins!" Peter just grinned. Marlene made a noise of disgust before she said, "Kill Snape, marry Yaxley and bed Dolohov?" She looked sick. Her eyes found James, who winced a bit at the thought of what Marlene was going to say. "So James," she grinned playfully, "Dumledore, Hagrid, and Snape."
"What?" James looked like he was regretting playing the game. "But they're all guys!"
Marlene smiled evilly, "That just makes it better."
James thought for a second. "Er, let's pretend I'm a girl." Lily cracked up next to him as the thought of James in a frilly pink tutu popped into her head. Or maybe a coconut bra. They'd both be entertaining. She'd definitely save that for a dare later. "Then I'd marry Dumbledore, bed Hagrid—
He didn't even get to finish before everyone was in hysterics. It was too much. James in bed with the half-giant, both butt naked, was enough to make anyone laugh. "Guys shut up!" James moaned. This didn't help at all because now James was moaning. Sirius couldn't breathe, he was laughing so hard.
When they'd finally calmed down James turned to Remus. "Remus my friend, your three choices are," he gave a dramatic pause, "your mum, my mum, and Sirius' mum!"
Remus started at James, his jaw wide open. He seemed unable to make any noise.
"You have one minute!" Sirius said cackling. "59, 58, 57, 56…"
"But that's my mum! I can't kill her! And I can't marry her either!"
"Then bed her," James said wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.
Remus looked horrified as the image entered his head. He shook his head frantically, willing the image to go away.
"…44, 43, 42, 41, 40…" Sirius continued counting.
"Okay, okay!" Remus said. "KillSirius'mumWedmymumBedJames'mum." He said this rather hurriedly. Maybe no one would hear him. But they did. And they all looked repulsed. Or in James' case hysterical.
Quickly, Remus said, "Er, Alice how about Lily, Marlene and um, Hestia?"
Alice stared. But when Sirius started to count again, she knew she'd have to hurry up. Doing some quick calculations in her head, she said, "This is so wrong but Kill Hestia, Bed Marlene, and Marry Lily." As everyone let this register, she quickly tried to turn the spotlight away from her. "Sirius, how about Filch, Bloody Baron, and Binns?"
Sirius started to pale. "Al, I thought we were friends?" he gave Alice what he thought was an adorable puppy face.
"Of course we are Siri," Sirius' face cleared, but then Alice said in a much more demanding voice, "Now answer the question! And you have 30 seconds."
"I hate you," Sirius said, as he pondered over his options. "Er, um," he said trying to buy time.
"A minute's over! Now we need reasons!"
Sirius groaned, seriously regretting ever making that rule. "Er, kill Filch because he hates me, wed the Baron because he's not as boring as Binns, and bed Binns," he mumbled. Everyone still heard him however, and soon everyone was on the floor laughing. "Okay, okay, I get it!" Sirius yelled. Suddenly remembering, a few pictures Lily had shown him of muggle celebrities Sirius started to grin evilly.
"Frank, your turn! How about Justin Beaver? Forgot his name but anyway that dude, Miley Cyrus, and Lady Gaga."
Frank took a moment to recollect himself before saying, "who?"
Sirius grinned at Lily, who grinned back. "Care to do the honors Flower?" he asked her.
"Of course Padfoot."
With a quick wave of her wand, three photos soared towards her, one of each celebrity. Frank's eyes widened in horror as Lily started to talk.
"These are three muggle celebrities. This," Lily pointed to a picture of a woman that was wearing a dress that looked suspiciously like—
"Is that meat?" Frank asked, looking at the picture repulsed.
"Why yes it is," Lily said smiling. "That's Lady Gaga. Now this," she pointed to a picture of another woman. This one was naked. She was sitting on a wrecking ball and she was… Was she licking it? "This is Miley Cyrus. And this," she pointed to the last picture, "is Justin Bieber." The picture was of a man this time. But was he really a man? He looked more like… Frank wasn't sure. The guy's hair was ridiculously long, almost covering his eyes. He was wearing a purple jacket and this smile, it was rather unnerving really.
"Is he gay?" Frank asked uncertainly.
"No one knows," Lily said mysteriously.
"Well hurry up!" Sirius said grinning.
"What?" Frank asked.
"Make your choices. Who'd you bed, marry, and kill?"
Frank continued staring. What would he say? "Er, I think I'd kill the naked girl, marry the gay one," he cringed, "and bed the meat one." He winced again as everyone started cracking up again, gasping for breath. Frank just sighed, 'Muggles,' he thought, shaking his head.
Okay so I just wanted to say that no offense is meant to the celebrities mentioned. I just thought it'd be fun to add some muggle spunk :) So did you like? No like? Next chapter starts truth or dare so leave some ideas in the reviews :D
