Chapter 2:
Captain Beckett hesitates in the doorway to her office before turning from her desk to scan the bullpen for any sign of him. But at 6:30am with no open homicide investigations, she is the only one of the floor. She shuts her office door behind her before slowly taking a seat at her desk, taking in the two small, wrapped boxes in the middle of her desk with an envelope placed next to them, leaning against a to-go coffee cup.
As Castle had been blatantly ignoring her request for space by weaseling in on all of her homicide cases, she had fully expected him to contact her about their anniversary, to try to persuade her to celebrate with him. Truthfully she was quite grateful that he had not contacted her as she is not sure that she would have been able to resist. When she had set out on this mission, she had thought that she would be able to come home before their anniversary. During the first week apart, she had wandered into a bookstore, needing comfort from her husband and believing that his words could be a substitute when she could not have the man himself, and had purchased Heat Wave. The idea hit her that same night while reading the first chapter; she had thought it would be the perfect anniversary gift for him and had tried to keep her recent actions out of what she wrote. But when she got to the end of Driving Heat last week, she knew that she was not going to be making it home in time to celebrate with him and had hoped that her message in the back of that book would give him consolation.
She takes a sip of the coffee, a small smile on her face at the perfectness of the coffee he had made for her, before she slides a finger under the seal of the envelope.
Kate,
Your anniversary gift was amazing, and you truly deserve a greater gift than what I am giving you in return. The only thing that would have been better than the books is you coming home, but I understand that that is not possible at this time. Given our current situation, I wasn't sure if we would even be acknowledging our anniversary so I definitely owe you next year. And yes, there will definitely be a next year. And as we have missed our wedding and our first anniversary, we are going to make it the best second wedding anniversary ever. But returning to this year… please open box one.
Rick
Kate rereads his note again, frowning at the fact that he thought she would completely ignore their anniversary because they were currently separated. Her heart aches when she realizes that he never said that he loves her, though she supposes it is somewhat implied by the fact that he thinks they will make it a second year despite what she has done. And she knows that she doesn't even deserve this after how terribly she has treated him.
Her hand shakes as she reaches for the box on the left, unsure what she is going to find. She slowly unwraps the paper and then glances out her office windows to ensure that she is still alone before she lifts the lid of the box. Inside she finds the chain with her mother's ring sitting atop another piece of paper. She carefully lifts the ring out of the box, not sure why he would be giving it to her when it had been in her jewelry box on their dresser since she had arrested Bracken, and after studying it for a long moment, she pulls the note out of the box as well.
This case has been tearing us apart since the moment you first told me your story, and I am sure that it is the reason you left. I thought this had ended with Allison Hyde, that LokSat was over and you were safe. But I know you, Kate, and nothing except this case would ever make you walk out on me. You've pushed me away because you are still in danger and you don't want them to come after me as well. I am returning your mother's ring in hopes that it will give you the strength you need to get through this and close this case for good, if that is what you want. I also hope that it will keep you safe, that she will watch over you when you wear it and ensure that you make it safely back to me when all of this is done.
Kate studies the ring again where it now sits on her desk, wondering how he could have figured it out. But Castle knows her better than she knows herself sometimes. They had been so happy together up until she left the loft on the morning of her first day as captain; after his initial self-doubt and worry that he had done something to upset her, of course he would realize that the only thing that had changed had been this case, that that had to be why she left. And she had fallen down the rabbit hole chasing this case so many times before that he would not doubt that she would leave him if she thought it wasn't actually over.
She had reverted back to her old ways to chase this, had thrown a year of therapy out the window, had caused tremendous damage to the most important relationship in her life. Castle had taught her to be happy again and to live with the pain caused by her mother's murder; he had had her back in this, taught her to be smart and go about things the right way instead of running in with guns blazing. He was her partner. But keeping him in the dark meant keeping him safe from this and ensuring that no one else that she loved died because of this case. And while she justified her choice to walk out by telling herself that she was protecting him, she knew that she had not changed as much as she thought, that she just could not let her mother go.
The cop stares down at the other box, wondering what else he could be giving her. After taking a deep breath, she unwraps the second box and opens it up. The bracelet that he had given her in the cake on the morning that everything changed is sitting there, the word Always staring up at her. This kind and loving man deserves so much more than she can give him right now. She closes her eyes, overwhelmed with guilt, and it takes a few moments for her to calm down and ensure that she isn't going to break down in tears in the middle of the precinct. After another deep breath, she reaches for the note underneath the bracelet.
You are the love of my life, and I will always be there to support you, Kate. We found this at the crime scene where you were shot, and I didn't get a chance to return it before you left. I return it now in hopes that you will wear it as a reminder that I will always be your partner and will always have your back. I know that you have made your choice and that you don't want me to be a part of this. But please know that whenever you need me, whenever you are ready to come home and tell me what is going on, I am willing to listen. And if you should change your mind, I am willing to be your partner in this case again.
He knew what she was working on, and he still loved her. And she knows him almost as well as he knows her: if he thought that he could help solve this and bring her home to him sooner, then there is no question in her mind that he would start his own investigation. He would put himself in harm's way to bring her back home.
A knock startles her out of her thoughts. She gestures for Ryan and Esposito to come in. "Just got a call about a body. You want to come with us?" Esposito asks.
"I, uh… I have to finish some reports this morning. You guys can handle this on your own. Just keep me in the loop, and let me know if there is anything I can do to help."
"Something we should know about?" Ryan asks, pointing to the box with the bracelet. "Secret admirer?"
"Just Castle," she says, her gazing shifting down to her desk.
"What's going on with you two, Beckett? You've never told us what he did wrong, why you haven't forgiven him after all this time."
"He didn't do anything. This is my fault; I needed space."
"So this thing between you two is all your fault and he's still trying to win you back with fancy jewelry?"
She sighs, "Our anniversary was yesterday."
"I can help you put in on," Kevin offers, stepping forward to take the bracelet.
"Dude, she pretty much broke up with him. She doesn't want to wear his present," Esposito frowns at his partner.
She stares defiantly at Esposito as she holds the bracelet and her wrist out to his partner, "We didn't break up. I just needed time to work through some things."
"I hope you know what you're doing, Beckett. Castle is our friend too," the detective shakes his head at her before stepping out of the office.
Kevin finishes clasping the bracelet on her wrist before turning to the door. "You're lucky to have someone who loves you like he does. I know that you love him too, but don't take him for granted, Kate," the younger detective says before he too leaves.
Kate stares down at the bracelet on her wrist, thinking about how she could tell Castle that everything he had written in those notes was right but still protect him and keep him from investigating on his own.
~KB*RC~
He looks down at the GPS tracking app on his phone, confirming that she is still a block ahead of him. He sees her turn the corner on the app and hastens his pace so that he doesn't lose her. Just as he turns the corner, he sees the captain opening the door to a building halfway down the block.
By the time he gets into the lobby, the elevator is just leaving the first floor. He watches the numbers flash above the elevator; when it finally stops at the fourth floor, he heads for the stairs, taking them two at a time.
A/N: Probably one more chapter to go, but I haven't started it yet. Hopefully will get it posted before the fall finale next week. Thanks for reading!
