Sorry I've been MIA lately, work has been crazy, and we're preparing to go to Ft Polk in March for a month long training exercise...so...fuck my life. But I got a four day weekend, so I'm getting some writing in.

It's still a short chapter, but I'm sure its better than nothing.


"YOU GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME?!" The young soldier was pacin back and forth as Jem was just staring at him with a 'WTF' look.

"He looks just like me!" Jem said as the soldier turned at him.

"No! You look just like me! More importantly, how the hell is this even possible, I wrote about this, but it doesn't happen in real life!" At that Jem was confused.

"What do you mean I look like you, and what do you mean you wrote about this?" Jem was honestly not sure what to make of this.

"Oh don't give me that, this has to be some kind of dream, there is no way I was transported to Out of place!" He was still pacing around like a crazy person, only this time he had stolen a pack of cigarettes from someone and started to smoke like crazy.

"I know I was desperate to get out of the barracks, but I didn't mean this!" He was currently finishing cigarettes at a record pace and lighting up another as soon as he finished one.

"You really shouldn't smoke Mister! It's not healthy!" Nala said as she knew that couldn't be helping.

"Neither is going on a 12 mile ruck march in the rain, freezing cold, and with the flu, but I do it anyways!" At this point the man didn't care that he was talking to a character he created.

But that was when it clicked.

"W-Wait a minute." He took a good look at Nala.

That cute pouty face, the lion tail swishing back and forth innocently, the shy twirly foot motion she was doing as she held her toy tomahawk.

The young soldier did one thing he was not ashamed of.

"Daaawwwwww…." It was one of the cutest things ever.

"Come here!" He picked her up in a hug.

"HGG GHH! Daddy! The strange man who looks like you is hugging me!" Nala didn't know what to think.

"Uhm…." Even Winter was still confused by this.

"Who IS this guy?!" Jem was trying to figure it out.

He kept talking about something called 'Out of place' and acting like a crazy person! Granted he seemed kind of stressed out until he got his cigarettes. So maybe that was just him freaking out over the fact that he just appeared out of a portal in the sky. After all, Jem would have had the same feelings if he didn't have to focus on punching Jacques in the dick when he first got to this world.

Wait, that was it! This man had to be from another world!

"Hey yo! Where you from?!" Jem yelled out.

"Illinois! Although technically Tennessee at the current moment…or is it Kentucky? I don't know hard to tell, I'm technically on the border." The man seemed a lot more calm because he was hugging Nala.

And it was impossible to not be calm when you got to hug something as cute as her.

"Huh you too?"

"Well no shit Sherlock, You're me!" At this point Jem was confused.

"But I'm Me!"

"Yes but you are also me!"

"But if I am you, then who are you?"

"I just told you that you are me!"

"But I'm me!"

"AND YOU ARE ME TOO!"

"You got to be kidding me?" Whoever this guy was he could be just as dumb as Jem sometimes.

"Okay, look, you got teleported here, and were originally a fanfic author in your world right?" At this Jem froze.

"How the hell did you know that?"

"Simple….because I WROTE IT!" The now identified JC said.

"Wait…what?" Jem was still confused.

"Okay, listen, this is usually the part of the story where you have a very long exposition meant to take up a few pages, but honestly I find that boring, so I'm just going to go out and say it, you were technically a self insert, but only in physical appearance, then after awhile you started to become more and more OC where eventually it was like you were your own man despite also being me." That wasn't a good explanation but it was his.

"Wait…so….I'm a fanfic character….who created fanfics of RWBY, who is based on a real person….and now we're both in Remnant." Jem was honestly confused.

"Pretty much, although I still think this is a dream."

"Okay, if you're really me. You wouldn't mind answering some questions." Jem knew if this guy was really him then he would know the answers.

"Bring it on baldy."

"You're bald too! But anyways first question, One man you would go completely gay for?"

'Pft, that's easy, Chris Pratt in Zero Dark Thirty."

"Okay one right, second question. Whiskey or Vodka?"

"Whiskey! I hate Vodka!"

"…..Correct, third question….one song that you believe is just as patriotic as the national anthem?"

"Real American, Hulk Hogan's theme song." At this Jem's face went blank.

"….Good God, you are me!" Jem couldn't believe it.

"Wait, so you wrote Jem into a fanfiction…" Winter was skeptical.

"So…it's a fanfiction within a fanfiction?" This was some inception style shit going on.

"Pretty much."

"So….you're the reason all the bad things have happened in our lives?" Winter was looking pissed.

"Er, yeah, but I'm also the reason for good stuff happening! Like I got you and Jem together! I gave you Nala! And there are many more good things to come!" JC knew he had to tread lightly.

"YOU….." Winter was getting visibly pissed off.

"YOOOOUUU!" Wait, why was she getting pissed.

"YOU MADE MY MOTHER AND HIS FATHER GET TOGETHER?!" Winter's rage nearly exploded.

"…." Jem didn't say anything.

"….Really? That's the straw that broke the camels back? Not the fact Nala's parents were killed, not the fact that the fall of beacon was even worse, not the fact that I also altered this world so much that there are probably even worse things coming, but you pick the moment where I had Qrow and Willow fuck each other?" JC couldn't believe it.

He knew Winter could get pissed at Qrow, especially since he had used that for comedy material, but he didn't think it would ACTUALLY be this bad.

Wait….what he said might have just pissed her off even more.

"uhm…I…..FUCK." JC knew he was dead.

"You're screwed man! RUN!" Jem called out to his other worldy self.

"These colors don't run!"

"It's alright! You don't have an American flag on you right now!"

"Oh in that case, RUNNING!" JC took off running down the street.

"GET OVER HERE!" Winter yelled as she started to chase him.

"OH SHIT! OH SHIT! OH SHIT!"

JC had to admit, when he fantasized about being transported to one of his favorite TV shows, never did he think THIS would happen.