"Ma'am?"

"Yes, Milly?"

"Have you noticed the-"

"Yes, Milly."

"And the-"

"Yes. Let's just keep going, shall we?"

"Yes, ma'am."

Milly gazed around the field they were riding through and the line of trees they could see not too far away. Actual trees as far as she could see, until it was stopped by a cluster of buildings in the distance. She'd never seen so many trees before! And the grass was so green, and it was everywhere!

She glanced over at Meryl. Her partner's face looked strained and anxious, and Milly could tell that she was trying to ignore the cold, hard facts in front of her. That was one of Meryl's problems, Milly thought. She had a hard time accepting things- like the fact that Mr. Vash had been the real Vash the Stampede from the very beginning. Or the fact that, right now, they weren't on Gunsmoke anymore. Because Gunsmoke had two suns.

Milly was a lot smarter than people gave her credit for, and she knew it- she didn't really mind, though. Meryl continued to stare ferociously directly ahead of her as she rode.

"Ma'am, should we take a break? You look like you need one."

Meryl paused, then nodded. "Yes, alright, Milly. But just for a little while. We need to get to that town." She sat down and uncapped her water bottle, taking a frugal swig before closing it again and sighing resignedly.

"Milly?"

"Yes ma'am?" Milly replied cheerfully, seated across from Meryl in the shockingly green grass.

"Tell me, how are you taking this so calmly?"

"Taking what, ma'am?" Milly asked.

"This… All of this!" Meryl stood up, sweeping her arms towards the lush landscape surrounding them. "How did we get here?! Where are we?! This doesn't make you frustrated- or, or- argh!" She put her head in her hands and fell on the ground, facing the sky. "I give up." After a few minutes of silent moping, Meryl turned her heard to look at Milly, sitting contentedly on the grass, hands folded in her lap, gazing around the land. She sat up.

"Milly, how did we get here?"

Milly looked at her worriedly. "Don't you remember?"

Meryl flapped a hand and took another swig of water. "No, I remember… You might've seen something different though. Just tell me."

"Okay! So, Mr. Vash, you, and I arrived in Fenla Town two days ago. We got some rooms at an inn, and then Mr. Vash and I went to the store. I bought some pudding, and he got some donuts, and he accidentally stepped on an old lady's foot and she got really angry and hit him on the shins with her bag. Then we went back to the inn and went to sleep. In the morning, some bounty hunters came into town and said that they'd heard that Vash the Stampede was here. The old lady from the store told them that Mr. Vash was staying at the inn, and so they came and chased us out. We got on our Thomas' and rode out of town, but then we got caught in a sandstorm, and we woke up here. We couldn't find Mr. Vash, so we started riding towards that city, and-"

"-Now here we are," Meryl finished.

"That's right, ma'am!" Meryl put a hand to her chin in thought. "So, what do we do now?"

Meryl stood up and put a finger in the air decisively. Milly stood as well. "It's obvious. We keep going! When we get to the next city, we'll see where we are, get some water, and then find that good-for-nothing, elusive, oafish, deceiving, troublemaking needle-headed promiscuous walking disaster of ours before he causes mass destruction!" Meryl snorted angrily and mounted her Thomas. "Ugh. It's all his fault. It's always his fault." She waited for Milly to mount her own Thomas, and then she started off at a fast pace towards the buildings in the distance.


Vash wasn't quite sure what to do. He'd just discovered that he was no longer on Gunsmoke, the planet he'd been on for over 150 years- and he was quite stumped. The teller he'd just spoken to, a girl by the name of Aileen, had confirmed his suspicions. He turned back to her.

"Ah. I see. Now, this is going to sound quite strange, and you might think I'm crazy… But what planet is this?"

Aileen squinted at him. "Is this a joke?"

"N-No, not at all! I'm totally serious. What planet is this?"

"It's Earth."

Vash stopped. He turned abruptly on his heel and walked swiftly through the big double doors of the bank, mind racing, and ran into a group of uniformed men. They were gathered in front of a row of black and white cars, and every one had a gun pointed at him. He slowly put his hands up.

Vash heard the doors open behind him, and Aileen rushed out in front of him. "No, stop! He's not the accomplice, he stopped the robber!"

The police ignored her, and three men stepped forward. "Put your weapons on the ground!"

Vash stepped in front of Aileen and pulled his gun out of its holster, then slid it over to the first officer's feet, who picked it up.

Aileen gaped. "You actually had a gun?! Why didn't you use that instead of this?!" She asked, making a finger gun with her left hand.

Vash shrugged. One of the officers frowned. "He used a finger gun?"

Aileen put down her hand and nodded. "Yeah, he twisted the robber's arm behind his back and put it to his head. It scared him off. He also stole all of his bullets before he got to the counter." She turned to Vash. "When did you do that, by the way? Was it when you offered him the donuts halfway through the line?"

"Yeah." The officer holding his gun peered down the cylinder.

"Hey, you." Vash whipped his head around. "What kinda gun is this?"

"Oh, it's great. I wouldn't really recommend it for anyone but me, and it's custom made, anyway- there're only two in existence," Vash replied. Yet another officer spoke up, this one seeming to be of a superior rank than the others.

"Give him back his gun." To Vash, he said "Put your hands down, son, and come with me."

Vash took his gun back from one of the men and put it in its holster. "I'm not being arrested, am I?"

"No, we just need your witness statement."

Vash raised an eyebrow. "Witness statement? What's that?"

"You really don't know? We just need you to tell us what happened, and then you're free to go, son. It shouldn't take long."


And it didn't, really. Twenty minutes and two dozen cheers and pats on the back later, Vash was walking out of town with a small stack of currency from grateful patrons of the bank. It felt really good to be appreciated, Vash thought. He pulled the money out of his pocket and looked it over. It looked like a double dollar, except it only had one dollar sign, and not two- it was probably just called a 'dollar'. He counted through the stack and came up with a sum of $428 and… a bag of caramel chews? Ah… That was from the old lady in purple, he recalled.

Vash put away his money and hoisted his bag over the other shoulder, taking up a brisk pace. He gazed at the landscape of trees and green grass, remembering the last time he'd seen such a sight- back on the ship with Rem, in the recreation room.

Then, in the distance- were those? No- it couldn't be! A huge grin plastered itself on the Humanoid Typhoon's face, and he took off at a sprint towards the two figures down the road, both on Thomas'- Milly Thompson and Meryl Stryfe, the insurance girls.