The Food Fight
Disclaimer: I do not own any part of the Harry Potter universe. That right belongs to JK Rowling.
On the way to dinner, Fred and George were looking especially suspicious but waved off anyone who inquired about it, saying they would see it for themselves in an hour or so. No amount of threats or bribery could sway them. When everyone was seated at the House Tables and they had been eating for about half an hour, Fred and George jumped on top of the table, fists full of food, and shouted as loudly as possible, "Food fight!" before throwing their food into the crowd, managing to coat several dozen people each.
The response was instantaneous. Gryffindors immediately got out of their seats and began pelting everyone, namely the Slytherins, with wads of food. And it wasn't just the Gryffindors who were getting into it, either. At the Ravenclaw table, some of whose members were a little too excitable, some older students had begun building mini trebuchets to launch food at people and the students from Hufflepuff were being surprisingly good at finding just who to hit to antagonize any house in order to keep things going. Not to be outdone, the Slytherins took part as well. While they were mainly trying to avenge their fallen comrades and taking revenge out on the Gryffindors, they found hexing food to hit specific targets to be extremely satisfying.
Mere moments later the Great Hall got dead quiet when McGonagall got hit in the face with a pie, but upon the realization that it had been Dumbledore who had thrown it at her, issued the only obvious solution. The staff joined in on the fight. All the teachers were getting into it, even Snape, who just for spite when McGonagall sent a pastry in his direction, flicked his wand under the table and sent it back at her who pulled out her wand and flicked it and sent the desert back at him and they ended up with a sort of tennis match with the icing until McGonagall hit too hard and sent it, not at Snape, but at Umbridge, who was scuttling out of the Great Hall, off to report to the Minister of Magic, no doubt. It landed on the back of her head and sent tart jelly all over her body.
She froze, then, and demanded as loud as possible, "Who threw that?"
No one paid her any attention but continued the fight, not that anybody would have admitted it to her anyway. She left as Snape and McGonagall exchanged a quick look, McGonagall beaming and laughing so hard she had tears coming out of her eyes and was in the process of falling on the floor when a bowl of pudding knocked her to the floor, but she didn't seem to notice, she was laughing so hard. Snape was trying to keep his face masked, but his mouth was betraying him and eventually, he smiled before picking up a very large handful of mashed potatoes with gravy and threw it as Flitwick who toppled over under the force of it. The rest of the staff stared at Snape, gaping comically at him, including Flitwick when he managed to get up before shrugging it off and continuing the war.
Upon seeing their professors delve into the fight, the students of the Great Hall decided that no one was going to stop them apart from Umbridge, but with her being gone, there was no need to hold back. House points mattered not when house honor was at stake. By this point, the other houses had adopted Ravenclaw's trebuchet design and were rocketing food from one end of the hall to the other. And when materials for trebuchets ran scarce, slingshots were quickly crafted and used for small-scale attacks. The poor house elves were having a hard time keeping up with the food use and were doing there best to replace empty trays and bowls of food.
After another ten minutes of this, Umbridge came back in with none other than Cornelius Fudge and several Aurors, including Kingsley Shacklebolt, and two others, John Dawlish and Hestia Williamson, who all three ducked as a mix of dumplings, chicken, macaroni, and cake came zooming at them from a trebuchet.
"Well, I told you! I told you they were out of control!" Umbridge said, obviously delighted. However, Kingsley, John, and Hestia looked rather cross with her.
"You mean to tell us, you called us from our job of hunting down Sirius Black and other escaped prisoners from Azkaban to come and stop a food fight?" Kingsley asked in a dangerous murmur.
Hestia reached over to Umbridge, held out a finger, and scraped some pastry filling out of her hair. "Looks like you got into this as well, Dolores. That's certainly not like you but I think we can let it slide just this once."
Umbridge's face turned red. Her body shaking with rage, she hotly retorts, "I most certainly did not! I was assaulted on my way to report this monstrosity!"
"Are you a witch or not? Do you not work at the Ministry? Surely you know several blocking spells, like this for instance." Without looking behind her, Hestia swished her wand just as a wad of noodles came within mere inches of her. The spell repelled them and sent them flying back at her attacker.
Umbridge's face flooded with even more color as embarrassment coursed through her.
"You know, I think we should hang around just to make sure nothing dangerous happens," John suggests in a mock-serious voice.
"Yes, John, I agree. Maybe we should get in on the action, make sure that nothing happens to our Minister or Dolores?" Kingsley tells them, doing his best to stifle his smirk.
"Let's go!" Hestia agrees, tucking her wand into her robes.
"Whatever are you doing?" Umbridge asks them. She couldn't have them mocking her authority but it also wouldn't do if they left her defenselss.
"Dolores, what part of food fight didn't you understand? Wands are typically used not used, unless I'm mistaken. And you might want to duck." Hestia tells her as not one, but l pies hit Umbridge square in the face, to the squeals of delight of the throwers. Hestia, John, and Kingsley joined in on the laughter before joining the fight as Fudge and Umbridge cower together in the safety of the doorway.
