-Assholes and Elbows-

Clemens was an ass. Hicks couldn't believe it, why was he always surrounded by asses? Lieutenant Gorman had been a stupid ass that was responsible for the deaths of half his squad. Hudson had been a smart-ass, but at least that helped break the tension. Burke was a conniving, narcissistic, greedy ass verging on the edge of psychopathic. Clemens was just a pompous ass…for now.

"Once again, I will go through it slowly so as not to confuse you."

Hicks couldn't tell where the disdain in Clemens' voice was coming from. It wasn't the first time that someone had spoken to him like he was a moron; Burke had seemed to get some sort of pleasure out of it on LV-426. Ah well. He decided to let it slide in order to focus on what the doctor was about to tell him as he re-stitched his wound.

"You, Lieutenant Ellen Ripley and the girl—"

"Newt." Interjected Hicks, "Her name is Newt."

"Well then, Newt's cryo chamber flooded when the EEV crashed. She would have drowned if we had not arrived so quickly. As it were, we weren't quite quick enough to prevent her from slipping into a coma. However we have her stable and a rescue team should be here within the week. You were essentially impaled by a piece of debris during the crash. Again, you were lucky that we arrived before you bled out. Although you seemed to be intent on finishing the job earlier." Clemens snipped the thread and examined his handiwork with a satisfied smile, "Lieutenant Ripley was the luckiest really. She survived with minimal physical damage. Scrapes and bruises mostly, but she's still asleep at the moment."

Hicks smiled to himself. Of course Ripley had managed to both rescue Newt and get back on the ship before the processor went nuclear. She was either that good or had the world's absolute best luck. He liked to think it was the former.

"There was also an android with you, correct?" Clemens asked

"Yeah, Bishop. What happened to him?"

"He was in pieces and unoperational so the men dropped him off in the junkyard."

The last time he had seen the android was when Bishop gave him a sedative. The fireballs were quite vivid. As was the sound of electricity and shearing metal.

"What is this place?"

"You are on Fury 161, a maximum security prison. Oh yes, considering that the rapists and murderers might react…unfavorably if they realize that a woman, a child and a Colonial Marine have all arrived, you are to be confined to the infirmary. If for some reason you leave the infirmary it will be only in the company of an escort."

Hicks nodded. "Sure. I'm not exactly looking to go sightseeing here anyhow."

"Oh, and one final thing. You will need to shave your hair. All of it. We have a bit of a lice problem here."

Had Hudson been there he might have come up with some sarcastic one-liner to lift the mood a bit. As it was, Hicks took another look around the prison infirmary, taking in more stained plastic tarps and greasy looking tiles and added that image to the 'lice problem'. The only thing he could come up with was simply;

"I hate this job."