Chapter 2
Kim's P.O.V.
Two weeks. Two entire weeks, Jared has been gone. I'm actually really worried about him. I wonder if he caught the same thing Paul had a few weeks ago. Hopefully he's ok, and if the rumors about Paul's fatal illness were true I hope Jared didn't catch it.
I sigh and lay my head against the window of Anna's beat up old car. She glances over at me before returning her eyes to the road, "You're still obsessing over him aren't you?" I roll my eyes. I hate how well she knows me, "It's not that easy to give up. He's like a drug." "And you're insane. Kim, you need to move on. He's an idiot for not noticing you, so he's not worth it. You're making yourself sick over this guy." I sigh knowing she's right, but I just can't help it. I've tried to get over Jared in the past, but he really is like my own personal drug. I just can't stop thinking about him, "I know you're right, it's just not that easy though. I know I seem like a lunatic when I talk about him, you don't even want to know the thoughts that run through my head, but there's just something there keeping me on him." "It's call an unhealthy obsession." I roll my eyes. She always has the perfect retaliation. "I'm serious Kim. It really is unhealthy. You need to let go of him. You're not helping yourself in any way," she sends me a concerned glace while pulling into her parking space at school. I sigh looking over at her, "I know you're right. I don't know why I'm so crazy about him." She turns off the car and turns in her seat so she's looking at me, "You're not in love with him Kim. You're in love with the fantasy of him. You have him dolled up to this perfect fantasy, but he's jerk. You know he is. In real life he's a scumbag who tallies the number of girls he lays." I think my lip is about to bleed from biting it so hard. I hate to admit it, but she's right, "I know. Let's just go."
We get out and run through the pouring rain into the school. It's really bad today, almost to the point where it's falling so hard that it hurts when it hits you. And lucky me, its supposed to just get worse as the day goes on. Anna shakes out her now wet hair as we enter the school, "I really hate that I have practice after school. I wish I could drive you." I ring out my own, heading to my locker with her, "Don't worry about it. I've been doing it for years." "I know, but I still feel bad. Are you sure you don't want me to ask my Mom to pick you up? She loves you, so you know she'll say yes." I sigh, that's Anna, always worrying. That's why she's so concerned with my crush on Jared, she's afraid of me getting hurt. I'm so thankful for it, but sometimes I wish she'd stop worrying so much and mellow out. "Yeah, I'll be fine. Don't worry about it." She sighs, just nodding. She knows that no matter what she says I'm not going to change my mind, I never do. I can be very stubborn.
The bell rings signalling that first block is about to start. Our school schedule runs on a seven day cycle, and the block that I have English rotates so it's a different time every day. Today it's first, and I'm actually glad because with Jared being gone I've actually been getting into the reading. I go to class rather quickly and am the first one there as usual. I take my seat and pull out my book, skimming over what I read last night. But my head snaps up at the sound of my name. My eyes widen like a deer in head lights when I find Ms. Glacin standing in front of me, "Y-Yes?" She smiles sweetly sitting in the desk beside me, "Kim, I was wondering if maybe you'd be interested in tutoring a student in this class. They've fallen behind and would like to catch up, and since you're the best student I have you instantly came to mind." I mull it over in my mind for a few minutes before finally nodding. It'd be nice to make some extra cash through the tutoring service and to be able to have something to do after school instead of just sitting around bored or listening to Anna drone on about some useless soap on TV she's caught on. I finally nod, "Sure." She smiles and toothy grin and stands up, "Perfect, I'll let them know."
Class begins after the second bell rings and I almost jump straight out of my seat when I hear a booming laugh next to me. I slowly turn my gaze to the seat next to me to find Jared sitting beside me, taking with Paul. His typically long shiny black hair is now cropped and spiked perfectly, I think I can even see a tattoo showing just under the line of his sleeve on his bicep, and if he was sick while he was out he's definitely looking a thousand percent better. He even has this sort of new glow to him. A shade of new confidence even. I like it. I like it a lot.
The lesson begins but this time I'm actually trying to listen, refraining myself from gawking at the new and improved Jared. I'm actually doing quite well with my notes, making only one heart doodle with Jared's name in the margin, but my breath hitches and my heart almost stops when the words "Tutor," slips from Ms. Glacis's lips. My stomach drops about twenty stories not from when I realize I've zoned out and we're now doing individual work, but when I realize who she's saying this to. Jared. I pray relentlessly that I've misheard her or that maybe she has someone else that's tutoring him while I tutor someone else. But my stomach turns over and I think I'm going to be sick when I hear the simple phrase, "Kim will be the one tutoring you." Seriously!? Does fate hate me or something? Who'd I piss off upstairs this time?
I glace over at Jared and see him nod, before Ms. Glacis turns away. He has a confused look on his face though. Paul leans over and whisper to him darting his eyes towards me. Wow, he really doesn't know my name. I sigh and stare at the blackboard in front of me. I swallow the pain in my chest and promise myself not to cry here. So you really are in invisible, is that really such a surprise? You have to work with him through because you need this cash so just suck it up and move on. Anna's right, you need to get over him.
Ms. Glacin passes out the sheet for homework to start on before the bell, but I can't help but feel like someone's burning a hole in me. I steal a glance towards Jared, and for the first time ever find him looking straight back at me. This is the first time in five years that I've ever been caught looking at him, and now I finally realize how horribly embarrassing it is. I feel a crimson blush grow over my cheeks, and I tear my eyes away starring down at the paper in front of me.
Write a two page paper on anything you so please that relates to Frankenstein. Be creative and original in your work and idea.
How interesting. Not. I just want to get out of here. Fairly quickly Ms. Glacis tosses the flag to start working, but my head still swirling with a mix of jumbled thoughts to even begin to brainstorm. I can't shake the feeling of being watched either, and it's making my horribly uncomfortable. So not helping the situation. I take a deep breath, and look up in search of the clock only for my eyes to connect with Jared's again. He's still looking at me with an unidentifiable expression on his face. Has he been starring at me this whole time? A deep blush grows on my cheeks darkening from the original. His eyes are a deep chocolate brown, the irises a black pool holding an emotion I've never seen before, matching the expression on his face. If I had to describe it I'd say it's sort of mix of awe and adoration. I follow the frame of his perfectly chiseled features to his lips and find that even his mouth is hanging open slightly. Why does he have that look, and more importantly why is it aimed at me? I look behind me to check and see if some gorgeous girl has strolled up behind me, but no, it's just some guy from the soccer team. Maybe in his time absent he's switched "teams"?
Finally I just can't take it anymore and for the first time in five years I speak up, "Uh…Are you ok?" He seems to snap out of his daze at the sound of my voice. He gives me a warm grin before extending his hand. "Yeah, I'm great. Hi, I'm Jared." My heart sinks with a snap. Now my suspicions have officially been confirmed. I really have been invisible to him all these years. I swallow the lump that's grown in my throat and try desperately to mask the hurt that washes over me with an attempted half smile. I take his hand and softly respond, "I know. I'm Kim." He smiles, "Kim." He says my name as if it's the most beautiful thing he's ever heard. Did he hit his head or something on the way to class? Maybe he was out from suffering through a massive concussion.
His grin remains as he takes me in, but it falters, probably because I'm doing an atrocious job at masking my hurt, "What's wrong?" He sounds genuinely worried and concerned. What has gotten into him? Is this some sort of joke? I shake my head, and turn my attention back to the paper in front of me, "Nothing."
I can feel his eyes still on me as I open my notebook to a clean slate, but I guess he decided to shrug it off because he hits me with another question, "So, are you new here or something?" I freeze in place. Don't cry. Don't you dare cry. It'll just be something for him to laugh at with his friends if you do, "No…I've lived here all my life." "Oh…" It's awkwardly silent for a few minutes, and I don't dare break it. One more thing out of him and I think I might lose it. I've always promised myself I'd never let them see me cry.
Luckily fate decides to be on my side and the bell rings. I quickly gather my books and being to scramble for the door. "Kim, hold up." I sigh, and stop. I really need to get some professional help for this, because right now all I want to do is run away, yet if Jared asked me to jump through fire hoops right now I'd do just because he asked me to. I turn to find him towering over me. Note to self, when forcing self to tutor him wear heels, "Y-Yeah?" Smooth Kim, real smooth. He gives me a small smile that speeds up my heart rate as badly as I'm internally cursing it not to, "I was wondering if I could walk you to class. You know, to talk about the tutoring?" Say no, say no, say no! "Sure. I guess." Idiot. His small smile turns into an ear to ear goofy grin at my answer. He takes my books from my arms and begins ushering me out of the room, "What are you doing?" He looks at me confused then follows my sight track to my books, "Oh! Sorry, I should have asked first. Is it ok if I carry them?" He actually sounds deeply concerned, like I'm going to get upset with him for him completing one of my wildest fantasies. I'm seriously starting to wonder if the this whole things is a joke or not, because aside from the concerned moments he's having Jared Cameron is actually carrying my books. I seriously must be dreaming. His concerned frown turns back into the goofy grin as we begin walking. Calm down Kim. He's only doing this because he wants a good grade. You're just the nerd who's going to give it to him. After this things will go back to normal and you'll again be Cinderella day dreaming over a Prince Charming who took five years just to finally realize you exist.
He rambles aimlessly about ideas for the paper as he walks me to my class. Normally I'd just tune out about now, but since it's Jared I listen to each word with complete interest. But I almost fall over my own two feet when he releases a certain question to me into the mix, "So do you want to meet at your house or somewhere else?" The idea of Jared Cameron being in my house is another dream I never thought would come true, but I'm definitely not able to handle that without letting my mind fantasize it into something romantic. I'm barely managing to with this whole situation. I'd love to just run with my wildest day dream here, but in reality if I did I'd only wind up hurt beyond repair.
"Tomorrow at the school library after school." He gets that grin again and nods his approval. "Great, I'll see you then!" He hands my books and just looks at me for a minute. I look into his eyes and get lost instantly. He still has that strange emotion embedded in them, and he's looking at me again like I'm the only person in the world. Whoa Kim, back up. You're exaggerating. This is Jared Cameron we're talking about, the popular, amazing, man-whore Jared Cameron. The one you stand no chance with in a million years and is only being nice to you because he has to grin and bear it for a good grade. He's not into you. I clear my throat and rip my eyes away, growing embarrassed and uncomfortable with knowing that I've let myself read into things again and get carried away. His brow furrows with what seems like worry. Why does he suddenly care so much? I turn towards the door, and start into the room muttering a halfhearted goodbye and enter the room. How am I going to survive this? Hey, at least he finally knows my name. Too bad he's still yet to realize that he's in three more of my classes. My day has just gotten ten times more complicated.
