So I think the first chapter went over well...


"Hey man..." Gaddes yelled as Van walked in the next morning.

"Are you still fucked?" Van asked incredulously.

Gaddes stumbled for a second, "no... do I really seem high?"

"Gaddes, you could be as sober as an orthodox Jew and we wouldn't think it," Allen stated.

Gaddes stared at him, a little surprised and hurt at the same time.

"It's okay... I'm sure Van's perma-fried too," Allen assured him.

Van gave a short laugh.

"Anyway..." Gaddes whined slightly, trying to get off the topic.

"So I assume you had sex," Allen said non-chalantly, lighting a cigarette and leaning back into the couch.

Van didn't really know how to respond. It wasn't as if he was shocked or uncomfortable it was just something that didn't really need a response. So with that he simply walked over to the small kitchen of the appartment. Upon opening the fridge there was, once again, nothing worth eating in it; a few bottles of beer and random unfinished pieces of food.

Van closed the fridge door and sighed heavily, "damn... I'm tired of no food."

"What did you do with your paycheque?" Allen asked, taking a drag from his cigarette.

Van was quiet for a second, he knew that Allen had been in rehab for hard drugs and wasn't exactly the biggest fan of Van's latest experiment, "heroin..."

Allen didn't say anything he knew Van was a bit touchy about it and he didn't need Allen dictating to him, it would seem too hypocritical.

"Well, we're going on tour soon... CD sales should go up," Allen offered trying to get away from the tension.

"I asked Hitomi to marry me," Van confessed walking into the room.

By now Allen had finished his cigarette, and all he could do was curse Van's stupidity and impulse, "how do you plan on doing that?"

Van shook his head, he looked genuinely worried. It was evident that he had been using Heroin for a while, considering his mannerisms, when he was sober, were so edgy and static.

Gaddes simply watched his friend twitching under Allen's scrutiny, "you really look like shit man."

Van stopped fidgetting and gave Gaddes a glare.

"Van, he's right, but aside from that... how are you going to do this wedding?" Allen asked, concern becoming very apparent.

"I don't know, I just--" Van started.

"You couldn't have had common law, you have to have her legally? Hitomi Fanel," Allen interrupted.

Van was getting a bit pissed off, he didn't want to see the logic in Allen's arguments, "yeah, I want her as my wife."

"You can't afford to support her," Allen told him.

"Well, it's not like she doesn't have a job, plus she will have a lot more patience with him than you do, it might be better than you think," Gaddes said.

Van was glad Gaddes was his friend, his positive attitude always came in handy.

"This--it's just so irresponsible, and stupid... it's totally something that Van would do, next he'll have her pregnant," Allen grunted, " fuck this, I'm going home."

"I told you Allen's on his period," Gaddes whispered loudly to Van.

Van started to laugh lightly, and somewhat agreed with Gaddes' statement. Allen's actions were somewhat resembling that of a girl in pms.

"Ah well, he is right you know..." Gaddes said quietly after Allen had gone.

Van grunted.

"I'm not trying to be a dick, it's just you will have a hard time..."

"Yeah..." Van said curtly.

"Well, I'm off," Gaddes said rolling off the couch.

"See ya..." Van trailed off, letting Gaddes go without looking back.

Van was alone again. He wasn't exactly sad, or a person where he needed constant companionship but whenever he was pissed off he didn't like being alone that way. Quickly he went to his room and sat down on the bed where the nightstand sat next to. Opening the small drawer, he took out the plastic bag with his chemicals in it.

He emptied the bag's contents onto the bed and sifted through the objects in order to sort them out. He had become so experienced that he no longer needed to tie his arm to find his vein, injections of smack had become almost second nature. Taking the small vile of powder, he removed the cap and poured a little pile onto the spoon.

Once the beige powder had become a liquid, Van put the lighter down allowed the subtance to cool for a few seconds. Finally after enough waiting he sucked it up and slid the needle into his arm.

As the liquid seeped into his body he immediately felt more relaxed and couldn't think of any reason to worry. Euphoria had taken over quickly, relieving him of any of his previous stress. He and Hitomi would be fine, there was nothing to worry about.


Time had passed rather quickly, probably since he was barely sober throughout the entire first three days of the tour. Whether it was Heroin or Marijuana or both, he had only allowed himself to come down or be sober while he slept. Otherwise he was shooting or smoking up. He would have continued past the third day if it hadn't been for him running out, or so he thought. Allen and Gaddes had made it look like he used it all, while they had taken it away from him while he slept.

He was currently sleeping, it was the middle of the day and they were only a few hours away from playing their next show. Gaddes and Allen had been monitoring Van for almost fifteen minutes now.

"He's bad..." Gaddes stated.

Allen nodded, "He needs to stop for a while or he's going to end up killing himself..."

"What are we going to do... I mean, I really don't think he'll take it that easily," Gaddes wondered.

"We can't make it like an intervention or he'll think he's being attacked... it has to be like his own idea or just another experiment." Allen explained.

"I never thought I'd be worried about him..." Gaddes stated.

"Yeah, I know he's way too smart to get this bad into drugs," Allen agreed.

"Should we wake him up? He's been sleeping for twelve hours," Gaddes asked.

"I guess, the last thing we want is him going into a coma," Allen said approaching Van.

Gaddes quickly grabbed his arm, "maybe we should get Hitomi, somehow I think waking up to his fiance is a bit nicer than his bassist."

Allen nodded, "true... where is she?"

Gaddes shrugged, "I'll go check outside and around the venue, you stay here and keep an eye on Sleeping Beauty."

Allen agreed and allowed Gaddes to leave. He didn't want to take any more time than necessary so he appeared quite frantic as he ran around the venue.

Finally Gaddes found Hitomi talking to one of the other bands' girlfriend.

"Hitomi, can you come to the bus?" Gaddes asked a little weirdly.

"Yeah sure... is anything wrong?" she asked hesitantly.

"Well... not really, sort of, we'd - Allen and I- would really love it if you would wake up Van," he explained.

"Is he okay?" he asked concerned.

"I think so, he's just been sleeping for quite a while," Gaddes told her.

"Okay, I'm coming," Hitomi agreed, and said good-bye to the girl before following Gaddes back to the bus.

"Oh, Hitomi thanks for coming," Allen said.

"It's fine, it's not like I came a long distance," Hitomi assured him.

"Right..." Allen admitted, looking a bit stupid.

"Do you want us to leave you two alone?" Gaddes asked.

"We're not having sex Gaddes," Hitomi said a little annoyed.

"We're going to go anyway..." Allen said, grabbing Gaddes just as he took a seat, excited to watch Van's awakening.

"Alright," Hitomi acknowledged, sitting on the edged of the couch that Van was sleeping on.

Once Allen and Gaddes left, Hitomi rolled her eyes at their oddness and turned her focus to Van.

Realizing that she would be the first thing he would see, she quickly fixed herself up by unbuttoning her shirt enough so he could see her bra. Once she deemed herself ready she climbed on top of him and rested her torso on his. She could hear the change in his breathing due to her weight so she waited a few seconds before touching him.

"Hey... " she breathed, taking some random strands away from his face.

He didn't move, he only continued to sleep.

"Van..." she whispered in a sing-song tone.

He still didn't shift.

Finally she figured she might as well pull out heavy artillery. Crawling up on him, she pressed her lips very gently against his ear, delicately whispering, "Van, you need to get up."

This did wake him up, but he continued to pretend he was asleep. Hitomi smiled and began playing with his earlobe in her mouth. Gradually she placed very slow hot kisses along his jaw until she reached his mouth. Just as she was about to play with his bottom lip he flipped her over and began kissing her roughly.

When he pulled away, since there was no where for her to pull away to, she lay there smirking at him, " you taste like pot."

"You wanna taste more?" he asked her suggestively.

"No." she answered shortly.

His face fell.

She smiled at him gently, 'your friends are outside."

"Oh, well what are they doing there?" he asked.

"Do you really think they were interested in watching that?" she asked.

"Well, Allen? No. Gaddes? I'm sort of leaning toward yes, believe it or not..." Van said.

"I believe it," she said.

When she didn't say anything further he began placing small kisses along her neck and collar bone.

Even though she was getting aroused she didn't want to give in to him, she didn't like the way he could have complete power over her unintentionally. It was too abnormal for a man to not want that dominance but have it nonetheless. There was also the fact that no one could be that beautiful and be subserviant to her; he was too odd.

Trying to hide her desire, she began to talk, afraid that if she were to stay silent she would give in to him, " you-- your show... are you excited?"

"Mm-hmm," he breathed between kisses.

As his kisses got lower and more heated she began to lose her mind. When his hand began reaching under her skirt she knew she wouldn't be able to handle it, eventually pushing him off her.

"What was that for?" he asked as he got up.

Hitomi just lay back and allowed her breathing to get back to normal and her body to cool down.

"Hey you, Hitomi," Van asked, slightly irked and on the floor.

Hitomi turned to him and began doing up the buttons of her shirt that he had undone. She looked at his expectant face and smiled, "you have no idea..."

"You're right, I don't," he said flatly.

Hitomi got up and stood facing him, afraid to touch him for fear that she might get carried away. Quickly she processed an idea that might help him understand better than she could explain. She pulled down her shirt enough so that her breasts were quite exposed, "can you resist them?"

Van's focus lingered on her breasts in a somewhat dazed expression, "no."

"Now you know why I pushed you off me," Hitomi explained as she pulled her shirt up, "we should go out now."

Van just stood there a little pissed off and amused at the same time.


When the three of them were waiting backstage Van was practically nomadic. He was unable to stay in one place, not to mention he couldn't stop complaining about how shitty the current band was.

"Van, will you fucking stand still!" Allen told him.

"Why don't you shove your bass up your ass!" Van yelled immaturely.

Gaddes couldn't help but start laughing. Allen was clearly not amused.

"Don't encourage him..." Allen stated blandly.

"You would have been laughing if he had said it to me," Gaddes protested.

"You would have deserved it," Allen explained.

"You mean you didn't?"

Allen opened his mouth to object but he couldn't really think of anything.

Gaddes just watched as Van began playing the guitar solo of the current band. He hadn't heard it before but since the piece was so simple and predictable Van was able to play it almost flawlessly.

"That really is incredible..." Gaddes mused.

"I know," Allen agreed.

"I wonder if the drugs help," Gaddes stated.

Allen shrugged.

Finally the band had finished and Van had never been so happy to hear music stop. He was dying to give the audience some real music. Just as Allen and Gaddes were about to go onstage Van raced out ahead of them.

"Hey," Van breathed into the microphone, "I am awesome..."

The crowd erupted with cheers causing the smile on his face to widen.

"So we're going to play a few songs for you," he breathed quickly, " that alright?"

The audience, once again, screamed and cheered as Van began playing the opening chords.

After the first song was done Van was the equivalent to one of his drug highs.

"What do you guys think of Allen's hair!" Van yelled.

More screams and I love yous were heard.

"Yeah... that's what he usually gets..." Van smiled, "so on another note..."

Van began vamping on his guitar as he waited for the bass and drums to kick in.

--

When they were done Van was sweating copiously but he was completely happy, there wasn't much that made him as happy as music did. Once he was offstage he caught sight of Hitomi waiting for him along with several other girls who were clearly groupies. A bright smile came to his face as he walked over to her, removing his guitar from around his neck.

The girls were going wild as he got closer, while Hitomi stood there so calm with a knowing smile on her face. Van hated that he was so predictable but loved that only she seemed to know it.

Once he got to the mob of girls he wrapped an arm around her waist and left with her.

"You're quite the bitch," he joked as they watched the group of girls curse her, but quickly move on to Allen.

"What?" she asked.

" I saw your face, you weren't one bit fazed... you were so sure that I wouldn't have gone for any of the other girls," he told her.

"Would you?"

"You seem to know the answer to that question already," he laughed, getting himself out of a corner.

When they got back to the bus Hitomi was quite certain that he wanted sex, which he did but there were other matters that were pressing.

"Tomi?" Van asked as he sat on the couch.

"Yeah,"

"I don't think I can--" he started.

"Marry me..." she finished sadly.

Van shook his head, "nah, I know I can't but I'm going to anyway..."

Hitomi turned to him her face completely rid of the worry it had only seconds ago, "what is it then?"

"I don't think-- I can't afford a big wedding... it's gotta be small, and when I say small, I mean microscopic," he said.

"Small is fine... so is low budget, which I think is more to the point," she said warmly.

"You're really okay with that?" he asked.

"As long as it happens," she told him, snuggling beside him.

"Thank you..." he said quietly.