So, at request I have power-written (is that a real thing?) this chapter to hopefully provide some light relief to you all.

This is set during 'The Tears of Uther Pendragon: Part 1'. Enjoy!

A Startling Revelation

She was triumphant, something she didn't seem to be able to say very often, despite her genius plans. At her feet, the boy knelt, chained tightly, clearly struggling but it would do him no good. Around them, leaves rustled in the trees, as if just to remind him that no help was coming for him. Well, unless he was some sort of Dragon Lord, and that was highly unlikely, he was a puny thing, no dragon would listen to him when they could squash him and use him as a toothpick instead.

But there were still questions to ask.

'Why does a lowly servant continuously risk his life for Arthur and for Camelot?' Morgause stared hard at the young boy as he sat silent. 'You know the answer, but you won't tell me. Why?'

Merlin remained silent. He couldn't spill his secret, not to her. Anyone but her...Ok, slight lie, he wasn't all that excited at the thought of spilling his secret to Uther Pendragon, either.

'You can take your secret to your grave then.' She shrugged, beginning to mutter under her breath, preparing his death.

'Wait!' Merlin shouted, he couldn't die alone, not in that forest at Morgause's hand. Not only would it completely ruin his destiny, Gaius had promised his favourite broth for dinner.

She stopped and smirked. 'So, why do you risk your life for Arthur, then? Reward? Duty? Some form of creepy loyalty you're going to assume I can't understand? As I've said before, just because I'm planning the overthrow of the monarchy and preparing pikes to put all your heads on when I've done, does not mean I'm a bad person...'

Her ridiculous monologue was too much. It came out of his mouth before he had chance to stop it. 'Arthur's secretly my gay lover!'

Morgause continued to smirk before suddenly realising what Merlin had just said. She looked at him, head tilted like a confused puppy. Except that puppies weren't menacing, at all. So she straightened her head again quickly, narrowing her eyes menacingly instead, hoping she looked a bit scarier, she had a reputation to keep. She stared at Merlin. 'What?'

'Arthur and I are madly in love with each other. We can't be together under Uther's rule, so he pretends to be interested in all these other women. But, one day, he will take the throne and make me his Queen and we can rule forever and be happy...'

'That's it?' Morgause asked, visibly disappointed. 'So you mean you haven't got magic and are secretly an old man named Emrys, consistently meddling in my plans to destroy Camelot, the light to Morgana's darkness, her destiny and her doom?'

'Erm...no.'

'Well, that's dull.' Morgause sighed, disheartened. She muttered under her breath again, eyes flashing gold, and Merlin's chains fell from his body. 'Might as well let you go, then. You really are a disappointment though, Merlin, I was expecting something rather exciting from you. I've got one condition for you, though: let's avoid poisoning Morgana again, though, shall we? It was a lot of hassle and it really upset her, you know? Never mind how long it's taking me to persuade her to drink water again, she's lived a year on wine and I'm getting worried for the state of her liver.'

'Fair deal.' Merlin reached out a shaking hand and shook the armour covered one held out to him.

'And if you ever need anywhere to go, just the two of you,' Morgause whispered. 'There's a delightful inn just out of Camelot, they don't ask questions and they have delightfully free mini bottles of shampoo, if you get me?'

'Of course.' Merlin grinned his cheesy grin and was about to begin his walk back to Camelot, before he turned around with a cheery wave. 'Thanks again.'

He couldn't keep the smile off his face for the whole journey home, even when a gang of ferocious bandits tried to attack him and eat him as a nutritious snack (he was too skinny to be lunch, they decided). But all Merlin could think of was Morgause. He had just never known that evil sorceresses, who were plotting to burn down the whole of Camelot and brutally murder King Uther, were so...understanding.

So the question is: Who has Morgause been going on secret inn visits with? (Though as a warning, I have no intention of answering this question!)
I hope you enjoyed!

Next up, Gwen has a romantic date...