Reality Hits Like A One Night Stand
Was that my head? God did that hurt. My eyes fluttered open. There was a coffee table in front of me. Or what I could assume to be a coffee table. It was really a glorified door on stacked up cinder blocks. Wincing, I pushed myself up, my hand automatically coming up to rub away some of the pain.
"Ah you're awake," a mild voice said behind me.
I snapped my head around to see Kakashi standing there with a steaming mug cradled between his hands. There wasn't much to say to that so I just stared at him.
"I made you tea," he nodded to his hands.
Swallowing, I could feel my panic attack on the edges of my sanity. If I even had that in the first place.
"Do you have anything a bit stronger?" I croaked, pushing myself to my feet, wobbling a little. "And food? I'm starving."
Kakashi tilted his head towards the doorway he was leaning in before he strutted in. While I was verging on insanity, now I was feeling a little more lucid, my eyes bugged on how I did not notice how peachy that bum was. I really must have been out of it. I trotted to follow him where I saw him tipping the tea out before reaching upwards for a cupboard which I saw was a glorified bar. Bottles and bottles glinted in the light.
It seemed there were a lot of things that were glorified in this crumbling death trap as I could have sworn I heard in the corner of the kitchen the ceiling cracking ominously. But I couldn't help but be thankful that there was some alcohol to be had.
"What do you fancy?" he waved to the selection that filled the cupboard to the very corners.
"Have you any vodka?"
He nodded, rummaging, clinking all the bottles together until he emerged victorious with a bottle with the transparent liquid. Screwing off the top he grabbed a couple of dusty glasses, rinsing them before splashing a finger into each. I grabbed both, taking each like a shot.
It burned, my eyes watered and my gag reflex came into play but I swallowed through it.
"Alright what food do you have?" I asked, shoving past him anyway. "Don't worry I'll make it, after all you are putting me up in your house."
When I opened the fridge I was greeted by a shelf with a cheese on the top with pickled beetroot and pickled pickles. I shut that turning to the cupboards where I was greeted with much more promising results. Clearly he liked his tinned food. He also had a lot of rice which was a god send. Although, I rummaged to the back of the cupboard where I emerged victorious with a couple of potatoes with not too many sprouts.
Grinning at Kakashi I was met with an eyebrow raise.
"Jacket potato and beans sound good?" I ask despite already pushing past him to scrub at the potatoes.
I swiped at the bottle beside me and took another burning swig.
"So, how long have you lived here?" I gasped out, the vodka burning my vocal chords.
"Long enough," he replied.
Great, not a talker. Mum said that I could talk…or well who I thought was my mum said I could talk for England but she couldn't complain about my customer service, I always got a tip for that.
"Well, I thought I was from a small farm in the middle of nowhere," I tossed a grin over my shoulder, letting my character play me out as I expertly started forking the spuds. "But now I'm just clearly just an able cook and an excellent baker."
He didn't say anything.
"Like at the moment I don't know if I'm sane or if I'm crazy so if I start flirting with the border please let me know," I grinned again as I shoved one potato into the microwave.
"You don't talk much do you?" I asked turning to hop myself onto the counter, my hand already reaching for the bottle of vodka.
"I have you to talk enough for the both of us," echoing what I was thinking. His shoulders relaxed a little as he leaned against the counter perpendicular to mine. He swiped the vodka from my hand. "And you're a selfish drinker."
I smirked, letting him swig, holding his gaze.
"Yeah just think of it my fifty other personalities fighting to come out. The last one is my alcoholic."
Pausing Kakashi stared at me with that black orb. I stared back blankly.
"Well, I'm glad I could meet their acquaintance all at once," he commented. "Although I think it might be a bit crowded for that many to stay here unfortunately."
I laughed as the microwave pinged, I turned it over slathering it with the butter that I found. Opening the tin of beans, I dumped them in a little used pan and heated it on high while I found a grater for the cheese.
"So…" he began.
I tilted my head to indicate that I was listening.
"What do you remember? If anything?" He said bluntly.
Freezing, I breathed through my stiffened muscles, forcing them to continue to grate the cheese. Just grate the cheese. Grate the cheese, comment later. Finally after grating all the cheese, I found a sealable plastic bag after much rummaging in the drawers and put half of the shavings there.
I put my potato into be microwaved.
"You don't remember anything do you?" he murmured, his hand wordlessly offering the vodka.
I heard the beans bubbling away, hissing their disapproval at being boiled but I snatched the vodka anyway, desperate for another gulp. Choking, I shoved the beans off the stove.
"I remember something," I smiled weakly. "But if it's the right thing I have no fucking idea."
He nodded as he placed a spoonful of beans on the potato and with a good sprinkling of cheese. Since it was clear he wasn't going to say anything I just mimicked him and started to eat my food when I noticed something.
He never touched his fork. But it also looked like he wasn't touching his food. But it was also disappearing slowly but surely. Then it just got weirder when he drank his water straight through his mask. I mean I saw him do it earlier as a way of staying in character but this was getting ridiculous.
I gave him a look as he sloshed more into my cup. "I respect privacy but are you really-"
"Going to drink all this vodka through my mask?" Kakashi shot another back. There was an obvious dark space on his mask. "Yes."
I shot him a look and downed my own, holding my cup for more. "They did say curiosity killed the cat, so I'm not going to question it."
I shook my cup obviously when Kakashi didn't refill mine. He paused. He put down the bottle with the transparent liquid, which I quickly snatched up and poured another shot into my glass. I knocked it back quickly grimacing at the awful taste and moved my mouth wordlessly.
Kakashi was still staring at me.
"What?" I finally exclaimed, feeling a little woozy from the alcohol hitting my system.
"You are saying you aren't curious at all about what's under this mask?" he asked dubiously.
I snorted and rolled my eyes.
"I never said that but I've got bigger things to worry about than some random guy deciding to drink through his mask."
He seemed to pause before he nodded when he came to the same conclusion.
"Well can you remember how old you are at least?" he grunted, the alcohol seeming to hit him too. "I feel like a creepy old man with a young thing like you."
I rolled my eyes and choked back another couple of swallows of vodka. My gullet by this point burned like anything but it also numbed the taste and feel of it. Score.
"I'm twenty three. I hope," I rubbed the bridge of my nose. "And I think you are being mean to those actually in their dotage, you can't be older than thirty."
His lone eye crinkled as he sipped his drink and said nothing. I raised my eyebrow.
"Has anyone told you, you are a stellar conversationalist," I winked a little now feeling the flirt deep within me come to the surface.
This was why when I drunk alcohol in my fantasies or reality or whatever I conjured a couple of friends to hold me back from making poor decisions. Not that Kakashi would be a poor decision. He had removed his green vest and other than gloves that he insisted on wearing still, he wore a sleeveless muscle shirt which had sober me drooling and drunk me panting and desperate for his attention.
I inclined my head to the living room.
"Should we move this somewhere more comfortable?"
Kakashi wordless swiped the bottle from me, glided past with a natural grace that reminded me of a panther, stalking his prey. The drunk me purred its acquiescence and sober me didn't have anything to say because I was drunk enough to forget that I was about to make a poor decision. That and my ability to allow the walls to sway. Kakashi sprawled on the couch leaving me a slight space where I wriggled my bum in despite it being a clear sign that I needed to sit on the chair to the side of the couch.
My libido was not having any of that. As I draped my arm over the legs that were arranged on my lap, I received a shock like electricity from a bull pen electricity line. The scent of dust and take out and of course, tea tree and spearmint flooded me sending my eyes rolling for a moment. I sucked in a breath, steadying my vision for a moment but it didn't help my libido any.
I reclined back letting my chest arch out as if I was getting comfortable. I peeked over at the man. He didn't even bat an eye.
"So should we make a wager?" I declared, shifting myself so I was leaning closer to him.
Kakashi turned his body to the side so I could see his torso in all its muscled goodness. "That's only if you think you can win," he leaned a little closer, "and I am just saying," he lowered his voice and leaned so close I could feel his breath coming in little puffs. "I. Never. Lose."
I raised a dubious eye brow while a flush darted low in my belly. I almost purred when I smelt his sharp scent of tea tree and I didn't, but allowed myself to hum my pleasure.
"I like the idea of a challenge," I murmured, my finger tracing up his bare arm.
My senses flared again, making me pause to gather my bearings before I proceeded in my descent to hell. After an initial twitch he became like stone. Pleased, I scooched further over into his personal space. There was a moment of silence before Kakashi cleared his throat.
"What's the wager?" he coughed out, his hand reaching for the arm rest as he leaned away.
"I get the bed if I get you to tell me your age," I purred.
Snorting he swigged from the bottle.
"Wow the challenge is insurmountable," he drawled, relaxing his body. "Like an anthill. So difficult to climb."
I frowned.
"Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," I announced.
Well if I was mad there was no sense in maintaining decorum right? I straddled Kakashi, my hands automatically going to his shoulders.
If I was sober, I would have never have done that and if any of my friend delusions had done such a thing I would have blushed a storm trying to usher them away from molesting the poor guy. But this was me. Alone.
He swallowed, the lump behind his neck mask making it blatantly obvious. I was making him nervous, good. I shifted my bottom in the pretence of getting comfortable. Out the corner of my eye I saw the way his fingers curled into the already large hole of his couch.
"And what do I get if I win?" A little part of me pouted when there was no strain to his voice to tell me I had hit a chord.
It was as cordial as if we were talking about the weather sitting platonically side by side on a porch swing. I shifted again, this time my chest aligning with his.
"What do you want?" I purred, my mind going through all the possibilities of his responses thinking of all the ways we were going to do it-
"Muffins," he responded, chipper.
And clearly not chipper from having me in his lap, no, but because of my baking skills. I frowned leaning back a little.
"Why do you want muffins?"
He shrugged.
"You bragged about being an excellent baker and I happen to have a refined taste for baked goods," he placed his hands behind his head. "And it means that I don't have to pay for it."
I cocked my head.
"But how am I going to pay for it?" my hands slid to rest on his very lovely pecs. "I mean I assume as with most bureaucracy that it will take time to give me money so you still would have to pay for it."
I saw the chin move down in the mask as if to say something before it shut again. It was too tempting to leave. I could see the remnants of vodka clinging to the one eyed man's mask like dew drops. I really wanted to sample those sweet dew drops. I mean why the fuck could I not? It wasn't like I could tell if this was real or not.
Hooking my hand around the back of his neck I sloppily dragged his head up as I pushed my lips to his and sucked his mask into my mouth, taking those little droplets of transparent alcohol. Grinning at the taste, I released the fabric, wriggling a little in his lap as the whole mask thing was a little…hot. I gasped before slanting my mouth over his again, my hands knotting into his hair.
They didn't move against my own.
I held in my disappointment well but I think that was mainly because the man in front of me was just a replacement for any other body with a pulse. Well water off a duck's back all the same.
"So tell me," I pushed my loose body closer to the grey haired man. "What is going on between you and dear Sakura?"
I gave a sloppy smile. Kakashi seemed to stiffen and took another fortifying gulp of vodka.
"There is nothing going on," he said coolly.
"Then," I rolled myself over him. He grabbed my hips, his fingers digging into my hipbones. "Technically you're not with anyone if that chemistry between you two is nothing."
My grin was lopsided as I stared down that black eye. I saw it finally tense. Ah, something hit him. It faded when I saw that he wasn't grinning, or his eye wasn't crinkling. Whatever. Sighing I lolled back on the sofa, taking myself off his lap in the process.
"Sorry girls are bitches, it's the cross we have to bear." I stared up at the water stained ceiling thoughtfully, "but you do make a nice enough couple."
I fell further back on the cushions as I tried to poke Kakashi in the chest and missed. I groaned. "I am probably going to regret this so much tomorrow."
"Barely released and I have you drunk, Sakura is going to kill me," he sighed deeply through his nose. "Come on, let's get you to bed."
Kakashi grasped my wrist which was holding the bottle and gently pulled it from my now limp grasp, struggling under the sensational overload. Placing it on the table Kakashi drew me up with him and I stood up with him willingly, slightly comatose with the contact where I could taste the precise bitterness of the vodka,
Now I may have been a bit drunk so I stumbled into a lot of objects, occasionally running into the walls but it hurt a whole lot more especially since I had Kakashi to lean on, meaning that my sense of touch was amplified.
After getting slightly more sober direction from Kakashi, we entered his bedroom and with some manoeuvring he got me to sit on the edge of the bed and began to remove his shoes and trousers. In my drunken state I was getting slightly turned on by an attractively fit man stripping in front of me and I was hoping he wasn't wearing briefs and my heart sank when I saw he did have a black pair on.
He turned to his dresser where he pulled out another pair of black boxer shorts and a t-shirt. He pivoted to help me stand.
"Oh believe me I know how this works," I drunkenly tried to say seductively.
I tugged my shirt over my head and dismissed it at Kakashi's bare feet, white in the dusk light.
"These come next right?" I purred and hooked my thumbs into the waist band of the black trousers and allowed them to pool at my feet leaving me as bare as the day I was born.
I stepped out of them, closer to the grey haired man and when I tried to lift his shirt from his body his halted my fingers with a surprisingly strong grip.
"The shirt stays," he said.
I nodded disjointedly, my head feeling unattached to my body. I reached behind his head and untied his eye patch. When it fell from his face, I was expecting some kind of wooden eye or maybe a hole where the eye should have resided except instead, a huge red eye glowed back at me.
I stumbled back trying to ignore the fear that chilled me straight to the bone, I shook my wonky head and stepped one bit closer to him. My breasts were so close to touching that black fabric, so close to feeling the warmth that I unknowingly caressed earlier that day.
In this state I think I couldn't have cared less, as was experienced from me grinding against Kakashi drunkenly, losing my balance a couple of times. His hands weren't pressing into any of my exposed skin, but I could just imagine the feel, the thought making me flush and feel a little bit of my desire to pool.
Leaning in again, I sighed as my hands burrowed under his shirt, my bare hands against the bare planes of strong flesh. I tried to hook fingers under his mask to pull his naked mouth against mine but Kakashi held tight to my wrists.
"You know," I drawled. "I think I am a little insane."
"You seem sane enough to me," he said evenly.
I giggled and when I withdrew, Kakashi had his eyes closed and the moonlight was on his face and I saw the thin line bisecting the eye covered by the eye patch. Gently I traced it with my finger, trying to ignore the kaleidoscope of colours pushing into my vision.
"How did this happen?" I murmured, unconsciously leaning closer again until my lips were almost brushing his again.
Kakashi covered my hand, pulling it away, "Curiosity killed the cat." He reminded me. "Do you need help into your sleeping clothes?" he indicated the clothes which lay abandoned as I had decided to drunkenly seduce him.
I heaved a huge sigh, flipping my hair back over my shoulder to twirl around my finger and lowered my eyes to the floor. "I will put my clothes on," I peeked up through my thick black lashes that acted as a fine tooth comb at this point in time. "If," I continued breathily, and put myself on my tip toes, "you tell me your real age."
Kakashi gave a huff of frustration, "This isn't playing fair." He commented.
"What you get with me are dirty tricks and misleading comments," I said in sing song, walking my fingers up his chest. I giggled. His chest felt weird.
Kakashi caught it flat handed. My eyes rolled backwards at the sight of my eyes tripping, the colours were soon overwhelming me and in the back ground I swear I could hear a beeping and some sobs.
"My age is…" he paused, "whatever you want it to be."
I mock glared at him. Pulling my hand free from his finally my vision coming back, I crawled onto the bed my bare derriere in the air as I crawled across the bed, blatantly ignoring the clothes laid out for me.
"I didn't know you had a tattoo," he said suddenly.
I peered over my shoulder as if I could see the tattoo I knew on the left side of my lower back. "Yeah, I do." I shot him a glance. "Do you want the answer to the unasked question or do you want me in clothes?"
There was a slant of silvery light cutting across his throat so I could see his Adam's apple bob nervously.
"Clothes." I pouted, but rolled over and sat up.
"You're so boring," I moaned, stretching my naked arms above my head.
"What bird is it?" he asked as he wordlessly grabbed one arm to hold it still to slide the dark t-shirt over my head.
Shaking my hair out, I stared at him confused. What was with that tone?
"A Kingfisher," I awkwardly scrubbed my nose with my knuckle. "Uh, it was meant to be the sister tattoo I was supposed to get with mine. She was going to get it on the opposite side. Or maybe my sister. I don't know."
His head cocked, his eyebrow raised.
"I've never seen one here," he knelt at my feet, placing both of my feet into the boxers.
"What a Kingfisher?" I cocked my head. "You must have."
"I have lived here thirty four years and travelled far and wide," he hitched the boxers up my thighs. "And I have never seen one of those before."
I frowned. Did I just have an overactive imagination? Then what he said hit me.
"Hey, nice to know your age then thirty four year old," I clicked my fingers out at him like guns. "You young stud."
Kakashi had kept the eye which had the red eye closed and managed to move the other heavenward while keeping the other resolutely shut. We were both silent as I finally wriggled my hips into the proper place, now clothed and going to dominate the bed.
"You can stop using chakra you know," Kakashi said suddenly.
My eyes looked down to him where he was kneeling in between my legs, in confusion.
"Chakra? I'm not using whatever the hell that is," I lay back down staring at the ceiling.
"Then you are glowing, firefly," Kakashi smirked as he stood up.
I lifted an arm limply not really expecting much expect my surprisingly unscathed pale freckly skin. But when I saw the radioactive glow on my skin I jerked upwards.
Wriggling my fingers I blinked. Holy shit. It was exactly like Kakashi said. A firefly. I gaped in awe and moved my arms, just examining the hue, to ascertain that it was my body the glow was on.
"Holy shit," I breathed.
I wiggled my fingers again and giggled when the glowing digits moved too.
"Holy shit!" I squealed, "This is the most wicked thing ever!"
I think I caught Kakashi with another smile which he tried to cover it when I looked over at him.
"I saw that smile mister," I teased.
He responded by roughly shoving my head back. I squawked indignantly as I flopped back onto the surprisingly cushy mattress. Feeling a wave of tiredness overwhelming me, I shimmied myself back onto the bed, tucking myself into the bed sheets.
However, I don't know what came over me as Kakashi went to move away. I snatched at his wrist, causing him to pause. We both were silent listening to the slight rustle of trees outside Kakashi's window, the imperceptible sound of his soft breathing.
"Kakashi?" I whispered, "aren't you afraid?"
He cocked his head.
"Afraid?"
I nodded.
"I'm insane," I whispered and drew in a shaky breath. "I am not exactly stable."
His eye crinkled a little and I thought that it must mean he was smiling at least a little.
"Believe me firefly, I can look after myself."
Another deep suffering sigh, and I could feel my vision becoming more lucid. But that had to be my imagination, I shook my head. No one suddenly becomes sober after the amount that I drank.
Another moment of silence.
"You might have to let go of my wrist to actually have the bed firefly," he prompted, his arm tugging lightly.
"Kakashi?" I asked in a hushed voice again.
"Hmmm?"
"Thanks for letting me stay in your flat," I broke the silence again, "you didn't have to."
"It's not exactly a chore," he said with a wry grin. "I get a pretty young girl to stay in my old man flat for free. Many men would be jealous."
Now it was my turn to grunt in sarcastic humour as I flagged back to stare at the ceiling.
"You don't need to sweet talk me into bed Kakashi," I said, my vision becoming steadily clearer every second, like I was becoming more sober by the second, "I'm already here. And you're not exactly old."
Kakashi chuckled. "That is true," he said as he walked to the door.
I yawned, snuggling myself into the covers after stretching my arms above my head.
"Go to sleep Jenny-chan," Kakashi said, "we'll talk in the morning."
"Jenny, just Jenny." I mumbled before I snuggled into the pillow, enjoying Kakashi's scent of spearmint and tea tree and fell asleep.
...o0o...
Partially edited to maintain new story line: 25/06/18
