Chapter 2

Answers

Luna and I went to the party and had a great time. It was exactly what I needed to get my mind off my personal ghost woman: a certain ghost who is haunting my nights and days and doesn't let me rest... is quite exhausting!, especially when I find her in the corridor in the company of Ron and Harry who are always by her side. And at night time, when I have to go to bed, I find her submerged in my dreams, in every one of them and as long as they go. These dreams, as long as they go, are not precisely innocent. I go for days telling myself that this can't go on, that this is not right. I am supposed to go out with boys, to think about them, long for them, to adore them. But no! Instead, all I am thinking about are girls. How this can be? I mean: my parents, my family, everyone since I have memory has taught me that this is "the right way" and any other thought or behaviour is inappropriate and not normal. Yet, here I am, craving like a lunatic for a woman that I know I'm not supposed to feel anything for. What should I do with myself?

I have gone to the library a lot lately, finding myself among books usually from the Restricted Section, looking for some way to extinguish my agony. I've found out that what I'm feeling is not rare, that it's something more common than I thought. But still, even though I know that I can't let myself think or even believe the fact that I like girls, the terrible reality is that I do: there's a small part of me which is growing slowly every day and sometimes even by the minute. I'm not sure of anything anymore; I'm so confused. I mean, it could be just a phase, nothing more. But then again, how am I supposed to find out what exactly I'm feeling, to prove myself that this is just a temporary thing that will go away in time and not something definitive? Soon enough I found the answers to all my questions one night in the library, by the least expected person of all. Who would have thought that Luna Lovegood would be the one clearing them all?

"Hi, Gin!" she said.

"Hi Luna, how are you?" I said, quite surprised to find her standing there. I have heard rumours that Luna was into girls but haven't believe it. There is, however, a certain amount of curiosity inside me, whether the rumours are true or not, and that part of me wants to talk with her, but the other doesn't want to.

"Look Gin, I've being watching you recently and I noticed that something is troubling you… I know what kind of books you have been researching lately…" she said, noticing my perplexed expression. "I just want to tell you that you can trust me with anything that is worrying you, I sincerely want to help you if only you'd let me do so."

"Look Luna... I don't know what you're talking about." I replied, trying to feign innocence.

"Ginny, I know what you are going through, believe me. I have seen how you look at other girls, how you walk into a room scanning it for them, watching them very quickly and turning around so that no one notices it. I can tell because I used to do the same thing. If you ever want to talk about it, you know where to find me, ok?" She started to leave when I called after her.

"Luna, please stay, I'm sorry," I said truthfully. "I don't know what's gotten into me."

"It's alright Gin; I'm here to help you," she said, smiling serenely and returning to my side.

"Please don't tell anyone, I think I'd die if someone finds out…" I was very preoccupied that someone would hear us and spread it all over school.

"Look Gin, don't worry about it, ok? I'm not going to tell anyone about it. Relax, you can trust me. Believe it or not, I consider you a friend," she smiled playfully.

"Thanks Luna, I really appreciate it and for the record: I also consider you a friend."

"I was wondering Luna, if you don't mind me asking… When did you uh… when did you realize that you fancy... girls?" I said the last part almost whispering, she had to lean over to hear what I said.

"Oh, well, what do you say if we go out for a walk and I'll tell you about it then?"

"Sure, let's go."

We gathered our things and went for a stroll around the lake. It was getting dark when we arrived to a little spot near the lake which was surrounded by trees. There was a magnificent full moon in the sky surrounded by stars. They were shining especially beautifully that night. Everything around us appeared so magical, like something taken from a fairytale book. The moon was reflecting on the lake and the air was a little bit chilly. We sat on a rock under an especially big tree, the air smelled musky and salty and you could hear the owls in the Owlery singing a song only known to them. There were a couple of fireflies flying beneath us as if trying to illuminate and warm us with their lights.

"So, as I was telling you: I realised that I liked girls when I first fell for one of the Ravenclaw girls… Of course, nothing happened because she was into guys. A few months ago, I met Charlotte. We became friends and suddenly we discovered that we had feelings for each other. One day, she kissed me and that was everything I needed to confirm that I, in fact, liked girls. Ever since, we have been together and honestly I can't think of a better girl to spend the rest of my life with…" Luna finished her story, a far-off, dreamy look in her eyes.

"I'm sorry to ask, but how could you tell with one kiss that you liked girls? I mean, kissing another girl once doesn't turn you into a… well, you know what I mean..." I said in a hurry, a little bit ashamed.

"It's quite simple actually: when I was kissing Charlotte, I started to feel things that I certainly didn't want to or couldn't feel with a boy. You see, my body started to act on its own; I felt like my blood was on fire, I had an urge to touch her all over, to caress her beautiful and curvaceous body and I felt a certain wetness starting to develop between my legs…" Luna grinned. "All I could think of was her and only her."

"But Looney, how can this be possible? I mean, I saw you at the New Year's Ball with Neville. If you and Charlotte are together, why didn't you go out with her?" I asked incredulously

"Well, Neville and I are very good friends, he's such a good guy, believe me... if I were straight, I'd probably date him. I promised him a long time ago that I would go with him to the Ball and besides, as you would probably have heard, the whole school knows that I'm gay… not everyone is very friendly about it."

"Yeah, I guess" I said thoughtfully.

"Gin…" Luna whispered.

"Hmm?" I replied absentmindedly and turned to look at her. I was not expecting a thing; I was taken by surprise by a pair of warm, soft lips kissing me. This kiss was nothing like I had experienced before but still it was everything that I had dreamed about, but fear raised thinking about what Luna's girlfriend would say if she found out that I was snogging her most precious treasure, so I backed up from her a little bit.

She sensed it and quietly asked, "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, it's just that I'm not sure what Charlotte would say if she found out about this..."

"Gin, relax she's not going to find out. Who's going to know besides you and me? I certainly will not tell anyone."

And with that, we kissed again. She pulled me into her arms and held me tight. My breathing was becoming heavier; I started to feel a sea of heat between my thighs that I could identify as the same wetness that I have felt only at night on my bed when I dreamed of doing this very same thing with my sweet Hermione. Luna ran her fingers over my hair, caressing my cheek slightly. Then she started moving her hand very slowly to my breasts, cupping them, caressing gently. Next thing I knew, her hand was travelling all over me, taunting me, making me crave for her, for more. I couldn't seem to focus. My emotions were muddled; I just let myself to feel the lust. She pushed me down very carefully on the green grass, she kept kissing me and a ripple of pleasure washed over my body... I couldn't stop a moan that escaped from my mouth; all I can think is... God I'm in heaven!