A/N: Just so you know, this is starting at Episode 1 of Season 4, Lazarus Rising. I know a lot of CastielXOC stories do this, but I do want to get straight to meeting Castiel, so this is the way it is. Read on! :D


And God said, Let there be light: and there was light. Light came in the form of a petite, rather pretty, girl, with hair the color of corn silk and deep green eyes. She wore black leather pants, knee-high combat boots, and a black, worn-out Rolling Stones shirt that had been cut off just above her belly button with an old pair of kitchen scissors. Bracelets littered both wrists, black liner encircled her eyes and two silver piercings, snake bites, rested just below her full lips. Her gaze shot straight through one's body; it seemed to look at your soul, or lack thereof, and say, "Give me your best shot. I've seen things, done things you wouldn't believe. You'll never take me alive." But one angel didn't want to aim his guns at her. He wanted her, no, needed her, to take his dead, frozen heart and blow warmth on it. And likewise, she needed him. She needed him to awaken her emotions and desires and to take away the numbness that had been eating at her for so long. Aside from the angel, no one knew of the darkness residing in light.


**Three Years Later**

Hear the sound
The angels come screaming

I rolled over in bed, momentarily unable to remember why I was sad. Then it hit me- Dean was dead. Four months, and the pain had not dulled. Just like the pain of losing my brother and father.

I lay there quietly for a few moments, gazing at the morning light peaking in around my curtains. Suddenly, I heard shouting erupting from downstairs.

"Bobby! It's me!" I heard a familiar voice yelling.

Forgetting that all I was wearing was an oversized t-shirt, I leaped out of bed and down the stairs.

Dirty and dusty, a very familiar person looked up at me. I stood completely still, unable to believe my eyes.

"Kaylee!" he called out happily. It couldn't be. It was a trick. I grabbed a flask of holy water off the shelf and threw it in his face.

Spitting some out, he gave me a look and said, "I'm not a demon either, you know."

"Dean!" I gasped, and stumbled into his outstretched arms.

Down your voice
I hear you've been bleeding

"Hey, Kaylee. Bobby."

"But you were dead!" I cried.

"I know! That's what I thought until I dug myself out of my own grave."

I pulled away and looked at his face. I felt a few tears of happiness escape my eyes. It was hard to believe I didn't like Dean at all when I first met him. Now he was like my brother. I frowned, and swiped my finger down his cheek. It came away brown.

"You definitely look like you crawled out of a grave."

He rolled his eyes.

Make your choice
They say you've been pleading
Someone save us

A few minutes later, we walked into the study.

"But Dean, that don't make a lick of sense," Bobby began, "Your chest was ribbons. Your insides were slop. You were buried for four months. Even if you could slip out of Hell and back into your meat suit, you-"

"I know, I should look like a thriller video reject."

I spoke up tentatively. "What do you remember?"

He shook his head. "Not much. I remember I was a hell hound's chew toy, and then... lights out. Then I come to six feet under. That's it."

We sat there for a minute, thinking.

"Sam's number's not working."

Bobby looked away, slightly guiltily. "He's alive, s'far as I know."

Dean sighed with relief. "Good."

I leaned against the desk as Dean began to pace around the room. He froze and caught Bobby's eye.

"Wait, what do you mean 'as far as you know'?" he barked.

"Kaylee and I, we've been searching for months."

"So you just let him go off on his own?"

"He was dead-set on it."

"Bobby, you should've been looking after him!"

"I tried! These last few months haven't been exactly easy, you know, for him or us. We had to bury you."

"He's right, Dean. He did try. Sam snuck away. And besides, he's a grown man! What were we supposed to do?"

He looked at his feet. "Why did you bury me, anyway?"

I shrugged. "We wanted you salted and burned, wanted to give you a proper hunter's burial, but Sam wasn't having it."

Bobby and I looked at each other. "He said you'd need a body when he brought you back, somehow. And that's about all he said." Bobby told him.

"What do you mean?"

"He was quiet. Real quiet. Wouldn't return our calls. Tried to find 'im, but he didn't wanna be found."

I'm at this old hotel
But I can't tell if I've been breathing

Or sleeping
Or screaming
Or waiting
For the man to call
Or maybe all of the above

I played with my hair, feeling guilty. I hadn't really called. You see, a couple of weeks after Dean's death, Sam and I had this big blow out fight. The little relationship we'd been building, it was over. He screamed at me to just go, and just go I did. I went to Bobby, and he was kind enough to give me a room of my own and let me decorate it how I wanted. He was real great about it. Even helped me fix up an old '69 VW bug. It was a light bluish, turquoise color with white leather seats and a sun roof. I'd installed a CD player/radio/iPod jack. It was my baby. Sam and I hadn't spoken since.

Dean pinched the bridge of his nose.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Oh, Sam got me out alright. But whatever it was, it was bad mojo."

"What makes you so sure?"

"You should have seen the grave site. It was like a nuke went off. There was this force, this presence, this... I don't know. It- It blew past me to a fill-up joint. And then this."

Dean shrugged off his over-shirt and raised his t-shirt sleeve. Bobby and I jumped up and walked over when we saw it. It was a pink burn on his shoulder and bicep, in the exact size and shape of a hand.

"What in the hell?" Bobby exclaimed.

"Obviously it's from the thing that yanked me out or rode me out. Just fulfilling it's part of the bargain."

"You think Sam made a deal?" Bobby and I asked in unison.

Dean nodded. "It's what I would've done."

He picked up the phone. "Hi, I have a cell phone account with you guys and I, uh, lost my phone. Could you turn the GPS on for me?"

"Yeah, the name is Wedge Antilles."

"Social is 2474."

"Thank you." He slammed it back down on the receiver.

"How'd you know he'd use that name?" Bobby asked.

Dean and I shared a brief look before Dean replied, "Are you kidding me? What don't I know about that kid?"

He sat down at the computer and went to the cell phone company's site. He glanced over and picked up a beer bottle. "Hey, Bobby, what's with the liquor store? Your parents out of town or something?"

"Like I said, the last few months haven't been all that easy."

Dean gave him a stern look. "Right."

Glancing at the screen, he sighed. "Sam's in Pontiac, Illinois."

"Near where you were planted?"

"Right where I popped up. Hell of coincidence, don'tcha think?"

"I'll say," I replied angrily. Yeah, Sam and I weren't exactly on good terms with each other right now, but I still cared for him. If that boy made a deal...

'Cause mostly I've been sprawled on these cathedral steps
While spitting out the blood and screaming
Someone save us


Later that night, we were walking toward a hotel room. We could hear music through the closed door. Dean knocked, and I crossed my arms over my chest.

A curvy brunette wearing nothing but a skimpy tank top and underwear opened the door, staring at us expectantly. "So where is it?"

I eyed her up and down, taking an immediate dislike to her. "Where's what?" I snapped.

"The pizza? You know, the one that takes three people to deliver, apparently?" she replied snootily.

"Look, I think we have the wrong room-"

Dean was cut off when Sam walked into view, asking "Is that the delivery..." He trailed off upon seeing us. I raised my eyebrows and gave a little wave.

And will you pray for me?
Or make a saint of me?

And will you lay for me
And make a saint of-

"Heya, Sammy." Dean said, stepping into the room and toward his brother. Sam stood there for a second before scaring the hell out of all of us by whipping out a knife and going after Dean.

"Hey!" we yelled as Dean caught Sam's wrist. We moved to pull Sam off of Dean.

"Who are you?!" Sam boomed.

"Like you didn't do this!" Dean shouted back.

"Do what?" Sam yelled.

"Sam! Its him! Its him!" Bobby spoke over them. "We've been through this already, it's really him!"

I slapped Sam's cheek lightly. "It's Dean, alright. Now would you stop trying to kill your brother?" I said, calmer than everyone else. I knew how to deal with Sammy. He looked down at me, and an apology crossed his features. I pressed my lips together; I didn't want to talk about it.

"Cause I'll give you all the nails you need
Cover me in gasoline

"But..." Sam began.

Dean walked forward. "I know. I look fantastic, huh?"

Sam looked at him a moment longer, before rushing forward to grasp his brother in a hug.

The idiot girl, who was still standing by the open door, spoke up. "So are you guys like... together?"

Dean looked over at her, the look on his face so funny I had to laugh out loud. Sam didn't look phased. "No. He's my brother."

"Oh.. oh okay I guess. I should probably go..."

"Yeah. That's a good idea." Sam replied, still looking at Dean.

The girl started pulling on clothes, and Sam led her to the door.

"So call me," she said, looking amused for some reason.

"Yeah, yeah. Sure thing, Callie."

She frowned. "Krissy!"

"Right..."

She turned and left, with Sam closing the door behind her. My brow furrowed. I know the past few months have been bad, but forgetting a girl's name? That wasn't Sam. He wouldn't do that. Something about the whole thing didn't sit right with me.

Wipe away those tears of blood again
And the punchline to the joke is asking

Someone save us

Sam sat down, and we all watched him.

"So tell me," Dean said, "What'd it cost?"

Sam chuckled. "The girl? I don't pay, Dean."

"It's not funny, Sam. To bring me back? What did it cost? Was it just your soul, or was it worse?"

Sam frowned, looking confused. "You think I made a deal?"

"That's exactly what we think." Bobby said.

"Well, I didn't."

Dean expression was strained. "Don't lie to me."

Sam looked up. "I'm not lying!"

"What, now I'm off the hook and you're on, is that it? You're some demon's bitch boy? I didn't wanna be saved like this!"

"Dean, I wish I had done it, alright?"

Dean grabbed Sam's collar. "Look, there's no other way this could have gone down! Now tell the truth!"

"I tried everything, that's the truth!" Sam said, breaking away from Dean's grasp, "I tried opening the Devil's Gate, I tried to bargain, Dean, but no demon would deal, alright?"

Dean looked taken aback.

"You were rotting in hell for months, for months! And I couldn't stop it! So I'm sorry it wasn't me, alright? Dean... I'm sorry."

I took this as my cue to step between the boys and put a hand on each shoulder, trying to soothe them.

"It's okay, Sammy." Dean said quietly, "You don't have to apologize. I believe you."

"Don't get me wrong, I'm glad that Sam's soul remains intact, but it does raise a sticky question."

We looked over at Bobby, who had spoken.

"Yeah. Who- or what- did pull you out of the pit, Deanie Bean?"

Dean gave me a sour look, and punched my side lightly.

Sam passed beers around. I was only twenty, still under the legal limit, but I'd been drinking since I was fifteen. They knew I'd kill them if they tried to take my alcohol away. I took a swig from my bottle.

You don't know a thing about my sins

"So what were* you doing?" I asked Sam.

"Well, once I realized I couldn't help Dean, I went looking for Lilith."

"All by your lonesome? Who do you think you are, your old man?" Bobby asked.

"No, but I was... I was pretty messed up."

"Oh yeah. I really feel your pain," Dean said sarcastically, holding up a lacy bra.

"Anyways, I was checking these demons out of Tennessee, and I don't know why, but they took a hard left and came up here."

"When, Sammy?" I asked.

"Yesterday morning."

"When I busted out."

"You think these demons are here 'cause of you?" Bobby inquired.

"Well, obviously some bad ass demon pulled me out."

"How you feelin' anyway?"

Dean considered this. "I'm a little hungry.

Bobby sighed. "No, I mean do you feel like yourself? Do you feel strange or different?"

Dean looked pissed. "Or demonic?"

He shrugged.

"Bobby, how many times do I have to prove I'm me?"

"Look, no demon's let you go out of the goodness of their heart. There has to be a reason."

"Guys, we have a pile of questions and no shovel. We need to figure something out." Sam said.

"Look, I know a psychic. With something this big, maybe she's heard the other side talkin'."

"It's worth a shot." Dean said.

"I'll go make a call."

"Hey, you probably want this back." Sam pulled a necklace off of his neck and handed it to Dean. It was Dean's charm thing.

Dean held it in his hand a moment, mesmerized. "Thanks." He put it on.

"Don't mention it."

How the misery begins

Sam hesitated a moment. "Hey Dean, what was it like?"

Dean froze. "What, Hell?" He shrugged.

"I... I don't know. I must have, uh, blocked it out."

Sam nodded, looking kind of skeptical.

"I don't remember a damn thing."


A while later, we were climbing into the Impala. God it was good to be riding in her again.

"She's a couple hours down on the interstate." Bobby told him, climbing into his own car.

"I'm assuming you wanna drive?" Sam asked Dean, tossing him the keys.

"Oh, I almost forgot! Hey, baby, I missed you!" He climbed in and sighed happily, before discovering the thing attached to the dash.

"What the hell is that?"

Sam rolled his eyes. "That's an iPod jack."

"You were supposed to take care of her, not douche her up."

"Dean, I thought it was my car..."

Dean gave him a look and started the car. A song came on, and obviously Dean didn't approve.

"Really?" He yanked the jack out, iPod and all, and threw it backwards, where it landed at my feet.


A few hours later, we were standing on the porch of the psychic's house. She opened the door.

"Bobby!" She exclaimed, pulling in for a hug.

"So, these the boys? And girl?" She added, smiling at me.

"Kids, this is Pamela Barnes, best damn psychic in the state."

She chuckled. "So, Dean Winchester. Out of the fire and back into the pan, huh? Makes you a rare individual."

He shrugged, obviously taken by her good looks. "If you say so."

She laughed freely, and let us in.

"So, you hear anything?"

"Well, I ouiji'd my way through a dozen spirits, but no one seems to know what brought your boy up or why."

"What's next then?" I asked.

"A séance, I think, see if we can see who did the deed."

"You're not gonna summon the damn thing here?" Bobby assured.

She grinned. "Nah, I just wanna get a sneak peek at it. Like a crystal ball, without the crystal."

She stepped into her living room and Dean eagerly followed. "I'm game."

Bobby sighed and rolled his eyes, following.

She pulled a black table-cloth over a round table as Bobby and I closed curtains. The cloth had strange white markings and a large pentagram.

She bent over, reaching into a cabinet for candles. I caught the boys staring at the tramp stamp on her lower back, which read "Jesse Forever". I lightly smacked them both upside the head.

You don't know

"Who's Jesse?" Dean asked.

"Well, it wasn't forever," she replied, laughing.

"His loss."

She walked over to him. "Might be your gain."

Dean gave Sam and I a Look.

"Dude, I'm so in."

"Yeah, she's gonna eat you alive."

"I just got out of jail. Bring it."

I rolled my eyes and went to help set up candles.

I overheard her say, "You're invited too, grumpy." to Sam.

"You are not invited!" Dean said quickly. I snickered.

A little while later, we were sitting at the table holding hands. I was between Sam and Dean.

"I need to touch you wear that thing touched you to connect me to the thing that pulled you out." Her hand reached under the table and I felt Dean jump.

"Whoa! Well, he didn't touch me there!"

I laughed, and Pamela gave me an amused look, eyes twinkling. I liked her.

"My mistake."

Dean revealed the handprint, and she rested her hand over it. We all shut our eyes.

"I invoke, conjure and command you unto this circle, I invoke, conjure and command you unto this circle..." she repeated. The TV behind us flicked on.

Suddenly, she broke off. "Castiel? No, sorry Castiel, I don't spook easily."

"Castiel?" Dean asked. By this point, she was the only one with her eyes still closed.

"It's name. Its warning me, telling me to turn back. I conjure and command you, show me your face! I conjure and command you, show me your face! I conjure and command you, show me your face!"

The table started shaking violently. Whatever this thing was, it was big, powerful, and coming fast.

"I conjure and command you, show me your face!"

"Maybe we should stop..." Bobby began cautiously.

"I almost got it! I conjure and command you, show me your face! Show me your face! Now!"

The candles flared. What the hell was this thing? Pamela started shrieking, and we looked over in time to see flames shooting out of her eyes, blood trickling down her cheeks.

So I'm burning

Her eyes shut and she fell to the floor. Bobby, Dean and I ran to her side. Sam ran to call 911.

I almost vomited upon seeing her. Her eyeballs had literally burned out of her head, leaving only her dark sockets to show.

"Oh, I can't see! I can't see! Oh, god!" She sobbed.

We looked at each other, then back down at her.


The next day, we sat at a diner. Sam hung up the phone and told us that Pam was in ICU and blind. All because of us. I stared at my hands.

Dean wanted to summon this Castiel, but I wasn't so sure I wanted to meet that thing. He couldn't be a demon. No, he was stronger.

"Are you crazy? Pam took a peek at him and her eyes burned out of her skull. You want to meet the thing that did that face-to-face?"

"You got any other suggestions?"

"Yeah, I followed some demons to town remember? Let's go hunt those down."

A waitress gave us each a plate of pie, then sat down at the table.

"Angling for a tip?" Dean smirked.

"I'm sorry, I thought you were looking for us." Her eyes turned black. I stood up, ready to attack.

Looking around, I realized everyone here besides the boys and I was a demon. One stood up and locked the door.

"Dean. To Hell and back. Aren't you a lucky duck?"

"That's me."

"So you get to just stroll out of the pit. Tell me, what makes you so special?"

"I like to think it's because of my perky nipples."

I facepalmed. The demon just stared at him, amused.

"I don't know, not even who pulled me out."

"Right, you don't." She didn't believe him.

"No, I don't."

"Lying's a sin, you know."

I'm burning

"I'm not lying. But I'd like to find out. So if you wouldn't mind enlightening me, Flo."

"Mind your tone with me, boy. I'll drag you back to Hell myself."

I heard the click of Dean's gun under the table.

"No you won't. You would've done it already. Truth is, you don't know what did it. Maybe it was some turbo-charged spirit, or Godzilla. Or some boss. I'm guessing that they don't tell you squat. Because whoever it was, they want me out. And they're a lot stronger than you. So go ahead, drag me back. But don't come crying to me when they come up to your door step with some gasoline and a match."

"I'm going to reach down your throat and rip out your lungs."

I smirked. "Try it. I guarantee it won't end well at all. For you."

Dean reached out and smacked her. Twice.

"Yeah, that's what I thought." He said, after seeing her lack of a reaction.

"Let's go, Sam. Kaylee."

He set a few dollars on the table. "For the pie."

Once out side, he breathed a sigh of relief. We all did.

"Holy crap, that was close!"

You don't know a thing about my sins
How the misery begins


A few hours later, Dean and I were both passed out in their motel room. We were awakened when the TV and Radio suddenly turned on. Sam was nowhere to be seen. Just then, a very high-pitched and very loud ringing started up. The windows and glass on the ceiling started breaking. Dean leapt on top of me, knocking me to the ground and shielding me from broken glass. I covered my ears and screamed.

"What's going on?!"

"I don't know! This happened at the gas station, too!"

Bobby burst in and yanked us to our feet. "Dean! Kaylee!"

A few minutes later we were driving in Bobby's car.

"How's your guys' ears?"

"Aside from the church bells? Just peachy." Dean grumbled.

"Fine. I can't get that noise out of my head, though."

Dean called Sam.

"What are you doing?"

"In my car?"

"Bobby's here."

"Done. Catch you later."

He turned to us. "He's grabbing a burger."

"Why didn't you tell him?" Bobby asked.

"Because he'd try to stop us."

"From doing what?" I asked warily.

"Summoning this thing."

Bobby and I exploded at that, talking over each other.

"We don't even know what this thing is!" Bobby yelled.

"He's right, it could be anything!" I added

"That's why we have to be ready for anything," Dean replied calmly, brandishing the demon sword.

We soon found ourselves painting every trap and talisman known to man in an old shed. Bobby's whole arsenal was laid out on a table beside us.

"Iron, salt, silver, holy water, knife. Set to catch pretty much anything out there. So let's ring the dinner bell. "

Bobby started the chant. A while after he finished, we were still sitting there, and nothing had happened.

You don't know
So I'm burning

"You sure you did the ritual right?"

Bobby glared at him.

"Sorry. Touchy, touchy."

Suddenly, an explosion of sound came from the roof. Crashing a rustling of feathers. We jumped to our feet, standing at the ready. Then, every single light bulb exploded and the doors opened wide. In walked a man with dark hair wearing a tan trench coat and a suit. I could feel the power coming off of him. It was immense. I stood there, mesmerized, for a while before remembering myself and grabbing a gun, shooting at the being. Sparks flew from the lights.

The bullets didn't even phase him. He just kept walking. I couldn't stop staring at him. He looked tough, but... innocent somehow.

"Who are you?" Dean demanded.

"I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from Perdition." the man replied softly.

"Yeah? Thanks for that." Dean wasted no time plunging the demon sword into the man's chest.

He looked down at the thing, mildly annoyed, and pulled it from his chest. We all stared in disbelief. What the fuck was this guy?

Bobby tried to smack him with a pipe from behind. The man whirled around and ripped it from his hands. He then touched two fingers to Bobby's head and he collapsed.

"Bobby!" I shrieked, fearing the worst.

"We need to talk, Dean. Alone."

His eyes, an electrifying blue, met mine, and he took a step towards me. I backed up. Dean grabbed my arm and pulled me from behind him. He glanced at Dean only a moment before his eyes returned to mine.

You don't know

"Alone," he repeated and reached for me. Was that... regret... I saw in his eyes?

"Yeah, well, we're alone enough. Don't you dare touch her. She can hear everything you need to tell me."

The being looked like he was about to protest. I peeked at him from around Dean's arm. We stared at each other a moment, and then he sighed.

We knelt beside Bobby.

"Your friend's alive."

"Who are you?" I asked, embarrassed to hear my voice shake slightly.

"Castiel."

"Yeah, we figured that. What are you?" Dean snapped apprehensively.

"An angel of the Lord."

Dean and I shared a look before standing up and walking over to Castiel. Dean pulled me behind him again.

"Get the hell out of here. There's no such thing."

"This is your problem, Dean. You have no faith."

Suddenly, lightning flashed and thunder boomed. A shadow of immense wings loomed on the wall behind Castiel. I stared in disbelief.

"That can't actually be who you are. You burned out that poor woman's eyes."

Castiel hung his head. "I warned her not to spy on my true form. It can be... overwhelming to humans, as can my true voice, but you already knew that."

"You mean the gas station and the motel?"

He nodded.

"That was you talking? Buddy, next time lower the volume." I nodded in agreement.

"That was my mistake. I thought you might be one of the people who can stand my true visage. I was wrong."

"And what visage are you in now? Some angelic accountant? Are you possessing the poor man?"

"He is a vessel. He's a devout man, he actually prayed for this."

"Sorry, pal, but we're not buying what you're selling. What are you really?"

"I told you."

"Right. And why would an angel rescue me from Hell?"

"Good things do happen, Dean."

"Not in my experience."

"What? You don't think you deserve to be saved?" He turned to me.

"Do you think Dean deserved to be saved?"

'Cause I'm burning
I'm burning

"O-of course. I mean, Dean's kind of an ass and he's a pig, but underneath it all he's a really good guy. He helps people."

Dean shot me a nasty look. "Why'd you do it?"

"Because God commanded it. Because we have work for you. We will talk again soon Dean. Goodbye, Kaylee."

And with a rustle of feathers, he was gone.

Heaven help us now
Come crashing down

We'll hear the sound
As you're falling down


A/N: So there you go! The first official chapter! Now, I did tell myself at one point that I was only going to use songs in my December/November fanfics, but I've always connected this song to Supernatural, and it's so fitting especially for season 4, I think. So because I'm so OCD, all the chapters will have song lyrics scattered throughout. And besides, I love this song so much. Which, by the way, the song is 'Heaven Help Us' by My Chemical Romance. Those of you who have read my other stuff know about my obsession with them. New people, you will learn. Also, the title of this, 'My Way Home Is Through You' is also a song by MCR. You should check them out. ;)

Just so you know, this took me almost four hours to write simply because I wanted all the dialogue (Well, almost all. The extra character made some things change) to match that of the episode. And that took forever. So now I get to go clean my room which will be another god knows how long amount of time.

Anyways, with that I'll leave you to yourself. Thanks for any and all reviews, favorites, follows, and anyone who takes the time to read it. :)