(K/N: CHAPTER 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOO!!!!)

Lord of the Soda: The Fellowship of the Soda

Chapter 2: Killblow's Departure.

Disclaimer: SEE CHAPTER 1!!!!!!!!!!

Last time we met, Sally and Pig Pen blew up a big, fat firework in a tent; Crowdo was being chased by fangirls; Killblow was going to give a big fat speech; and Spam, well, he went home already.

(S/N: Why do we have to say this? Didn't they read the first chapter?)

(K/N: Because it's many hours later and that's where we are now.)

Well Kill- I mean "JABBA" has to give a speech, and everyone is only listening because his speech signals the end of the party.

"Attention all you freaks!!!!!! Today is my 111th birthday! Woooooooo!!!!" he said.

"Dang that's old!" Crowdo muttered as soon as he got a moment to rest.  Then he was chased by fangirls again.

"Anyways, I just want to tell you this...I'M KING OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!! NOW BOW DOWN TO ME, DROOL MONKEY!!!!" Killblow cried.

You hear random hobbits muttering "Oh no! Not again!!!!" as Killblow climbs on top of the tent. He rambles on and on, and soon, no one cares anymore.

(Jabba: HEY!!! This is an important speech!)

(S/N: No, it's not.)

(J/N: YES, it is!)

(S/N: NO!!)

(J/N: YESSSSS!!!)

           

(S/N: NO IT AINT!! HERE! CHUG A SODA! DIE FOR ALL I CARE!!)

           

Sabra then throws a soda at Killblow.

(K/N: Uhhh...Sabie? That's the evil soda of Mt. Evilness...)

           

(S/N: Ooops.)

           

Killblow, being the stupid senile old fart he is, drank the evil soda and disappears. The whole crowd cheers because he is gone.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*          

Meanwhile, Killblow was, yet again, smoking weed. Randalf walks into the hole.

"HI RANDI!!!!!" Killblow exclaimed when he saw Randalf. Randalf cringes when he hears Killblow.

"Don't call me that." Randalf looks at the smoke filling the room.

"ARE YOU SMOKING WEED????? I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT!!!!! YOU'LL SCAR CROWDO!!!!!"

Killblow shrugs. "Too late," he replies. "The fan girls have gotten to him already. So why bother?"

"Maybe because he's the heir to all of your crap when you croak."

"He is? I thought that he was just some guy that lived with me...."

"Ughhh. Whatever.....so, are you going to go stay with the elves like you planned?"

"I don't think that the elves like me that well," Killblow said sadly.

"Well, nobody does." Randalf muttered. Then he said to Killblow, "No they won't, Killblow. They just adore you!"

"Ok!" Killblow starts to head out the door. Then he turns around as if he forgot something. "Oh yeah. Here, take this can of soda and give it to Crowdo. I don't really like the taste of evil. And don't forget to feed the cat!"

"You have a cat?" Randalf asked with a shock.

"Yup! His name is Crowdo! He's a big kitten and he can talk!"

"HE'S NOT A CAT, HE'S YOUR NEPHNEW!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Killblow doesn't seem to be listening to Randalf. "........and I adopted him when his mommy and daddy  abandoned him!"

"THEY DIDN'T ABANDON HIM! THEY DIED YOU SEINEL OLD FART!!!!!!"

Crowdo then walks in and starts to cry.

"MY PARENTS ARE DEAD???? YOU SAID THEY WENT TO FIND POTATOES!!!!!! WAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wait, aren't you supposed to be gone, Uncle Killblow?"

"Oh yeah! Hasta la BYE BYE!!!!" Killblow says as he leaves the hobbit hole.

"Where's he going?" Crowdo asked.

"He's gone to stay with the elves. He's left everything in your name," Randolf said.

"What do you mean? Everything was mine to begin with."

"Say wha?"

"I paid the bills, did the dishes, made the meals, and all Uncle Killblow did was eat and smoke everything. And when I say everything, I mean EVERYTHING!"

"Even his cat?"

"He had a cat?"

"Uhhhh... nevermind. Anyways, I need you to go to Mt. Evilness and destroy this evil ring he left you."

"But it's not evil. Look at the label. It's only-"

"NO!!! Don't speak its name! It' s evil, I tell you. EEEEEEEEVVIL!!!"

"Okay, okay. Geez. You're starting to act like Uncle Killblow."

            Both of them shudder.

"Well, you can't go by your self, since it's a long journey and all. I know! Spam can go with you!"

All of a sudden, they hear something in the bushes. Randolf hits the bushes and drags it into the room.

"Spam! Just the person I want to see! But why are you in the bushes?" Randolf said happily.

"I... I was stalk- I mean cutting the grass," Spam said.

"Why?" Crowdo asked as he edged away from Spam.

"Because I wanted to... ummm...get it over with!" Spam responded.

"Okay.....so, ummm, do you wanna destroy some evil soda that will bring certain doom to Middle of da Earth if not?" Crowdo asked.

"OKAY!! But what about the garden and grass?"

"Have the cat take care of it," Randolf interrupted.

"Cats can't garden, silly! Wait. You have a cat?" Spam asked.

"Nevermind. So, do you want to go or not?" Randolf said.

"NO! I won't go!" Spam yelled.

"Why?" Crowdo asked.

"Because you get all the girls!!!" Spam cried, "I HATE HIM!! I HATE HIM!! HATE HIM HATE HIM HATE HIM!!!!!!!!"

"Oh come on! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE???" Crowdo begged. It was pitiful, but then again, it's CROWDO! So do the fan girls mind? NOPE!

"Oh, all right. Only because it's for you! But if I come back to a dead garden, I'll kill you!" Spam said.

"Okay. See you tomorrow," Crowdo said.

"Okay! I LOVE- I mean, yeah. Later, dude."

Spam left the hobbit hole with Randolf and Crowdo still confused.

"Did he just call me 'dude'?" Crowdo asked.