Hello! Sorry for the wait, uni is kicking my ass :(

not much to say, just enjoy and even though nothing happens in this chapter, I promise Lucy and Edmund will appear very soon!


Chapter Two

The wind had been fantastic their first day of sailing, propelling them away from the Narnian beach faster than Caspian could ever have imagined. They'd reached their first destination in one day and their second in three, made sure they'd had supplies, drank and danced with the lords and ladies and said their goodbyes, eager to reach the Lone Islands. It was past midday on the last day of the first week of their journey and the crew had just had their lunch and were milling around, enjoying the nice day and the relaxation of a ship that was gliding gracefully on the water, having found a nice little routine. Caspian heard a few shouts of "Your Majesty!" and turned to see Aurelia. After breakfast that morning Aurelia had felt faint so had retired to her and Caspian's cabin for a rest. She now emerged looking as radiant as always in a purple dress, simple but very beautiful. She looked tired, though. Tired and gaunt. When she spotted Caspian, the ghost of a smile crossed her face and she made her way slowly to him, leaning over the railing, staring into the depths of the water. The wind whipped her hair around her face and she ran an impatient hand through it, trying to flatten it. Caspian leaned next to her, breathing deeply.

"Did you sleep?"

Aurelia glanced briefly at him, and then down at the hand that was almost touching hers, "No, the cabin was stuffy. I just lay there for a while,"

"You should have told me. I'll have another porthole put in,"

"Don't bother too much," Aurelia murmured, laying a hand on Caspian's softly. Sometimes, in moments like this, Caspian thought that Aurelia would finally let him touch her, finally let him love her as he knew he could, if he was given the chance. Caspian covered Aurelia's hand with his, stroking it softly with her thumb, but she flinched away from him, holding her hands tightly in front of her. Caspian sighed and once more leaned on the railing. There was an uncomfortable silence.

"Do you remember our wedding?" Caspian suddenly asked. Aurelia's head shot up but she didn't look at him.

"Of course," Aurelia smiled. "I was terrified,"

"You had every reason to be. I was asking you to become a wife and a queen all in one day," Caspian cast his mind back to that day, the day they'd both been dreading for months before.

She looked beautiful in a simple white gown, a veil of lace falling gracefully from her dark curls. Caspian's heart was racing as he watched Trumpkin walk her down the aisle. Aurelia kept her eyes down, most would think she was the perfect picture of the blushing bride, Caspian knew that she couldn't bear to look him in the eyes. The music faded and soon Aurelia was standing in front of him, her eyes still downcast. Aslan stood before them, making an appearance in Narnia on this special day and looked pointedly at Aurelia. Caspian lifted her veil off her face and touched her cheek softly. She, thank goodness had the sense not to flinch, but still would not meet his eyes. Caspian sighed and took her hand and they both turned to Aslan. Caspian barely heard any of the words that were said and simply repeated his vows blindly, as did Aurelia.

"I do," he said. Aslan looked expectantly at Aurelia. She hesitated, and looked Caspian in the eyes for the first time. A single tear dropped down her face.

"I do," she whispered. Caspian leaned forward and kissed Aurelia softly on the lips, a kiss she struggled to return. And the next thing they both knew, they were sitting side by side in the throne room, realizing that it was too late to turn back.

And he'd tried not to look back. He'd tried so hard to put Susan out of his mind even though he felt it so unfair that he hadn't been able to pursue a relationship with her. Their first and last kiss had ignited a fire in him and made him want her so much, but she left and he had to accept his duty. He had promised Peter that he would look after Aurelia and Narnia and he would do just that. But Aurelia wouldn't open herself up to him. She wouldn't let him near her. They had been married for two years now and while they had become used to one another's habits, while they knew each other quite well, Caspian still felt as if Aurelia was a huge mystery to him. Caspian now felt her shift next to him, her hand absentmindedly rubbing her stomach. She still did this from time to time as if she didn't quite believe that she lost the little one. Caspian put a hand on her cheek and she closed her eyes and briefly leaned into his hand before sighing and turning away from him, engaging Drinian in a conversation about their supplies and what they would have to get when they reached the island of Doorne, which they would be sailing into just the next day if the wind kept up. Caspian sighed, turning away from her and walking to Reepicheep the mouse, who sat humming a tune to himself. He straightened up and bowed low when he saw the King approaching.

"My liege,"

Caspian laughed, waving his hand, "Reep, enough with the formalities. You don't have to bow every time I approach,"

"I am a mouse of honour, sire,"

"You are. You have more honour possibly than all of my men combined,"

"Thank you, your Majesty. That is the highest praise," Reepicheep sheathed his sword as he stood and glanced over at the Queen who now sat staring at her hands. Caspian suspected she stared at her wedding ring, which had been a gift from Peter in the golden. He had given it to Caspian when he had given his blessing for Caspian to take Aurelia for his bride. Caspian had had the ring set with a purple stone, hoping to make it remind her less of Peter, but that hadn't seemed to work. Reepicheep looked from the Queen to the King, a small smile on his face.

"The sea air suits her, sire,"

"Yes," Caspian said absentmindedly.

"You're worried about the Queen?"

"Haven't I been consistently worried about the Queen for the last 3 years?"

"Yes you have and don't you think it's time for that to stop? She's perfectly healthy now," Reepicheep's eyes were wide and imploring as he said this. "Because it just makes you miserable,"

Caspian sighed and shrugged his shoulders, "She's my wife. I'll never stop worrying about her,"

"So you love her?"

Caspian paused and looked in surprised at Reepicheep but couldn't answer the question because he honestly didn't know if it was yes or no that would come out of his mouth. He simply had no idea. Yes, his feelings were very strong for Aurelia but they came from a place of possessiveness. Of wanting to protect her and keep her safe. It came from a want for what she and Peter had, that deep spiritual connection. He desperately wished for the girl he'd first met three years ago. The girl who seemed to care deeply for him. Ever since the four Pevensie children had left so had that girl. A shadow crossed her face, a light left her eyes. And Caspian truly did not know if she would ever love him, or if he could ever love her when she couldn't even return his affections. Was he doomed to a loveless marriage?


Aurelia retired early that night, tiredness washing over just after dinner, so she'd kissed her husband softly on the lips, much to the crews delight and retired to her room. Now, dressed in her night gown, she sat on her bed and pulled a brush through her long curls. The fresh sea air should have made her relax, should have healed her heart, but it just brought back too many memories from her days sailing with Peter and his siblings. She missed Lucy's laughter, talking to Susan about the latest fashions, Edmund sparring with everyone on the ship, showing off his newfound skills. But most of all, she missed see Peter stand on the highest deck of the ship. Seeing his golden hair shine in the sun. And seeing his eyes light up as they landed on her. The pure love that was in his gaze every time he looked at her. She closed her eyes only to be greeted with an image of him in her mind. Aurelia's eyes snapped open. She really should stop thinking like this. It wasn't fair to Caspian and he had been so good to her. Better than she deserved. She pulled back the covers and got into her soft bed, sinking into the pillows sighing in relief. Her really only solace these days was when she dreamt for her dreams were sometimes generous and gave her memories of her Pevensie's. Yet at other times they plagued her with images she had tried so hard to forget. Aurelia closed her eyes tight and willed her mind to close, willed her mind to forget but it wouldn't and she let out a loud whimper. Just her luck the door opened at the moment and she heard Caspian rush in and sit by her side. Her eyes slowly opened and she dared looking at him, her heart crying at the sheer understanding and care she saw on his face. He put a hand cautiously out to her and in a move very rare she took and pulled herself up, resting her chin on his shoulder, his arms encircling her waist.

"The nightmare?" he murmured.

"No. Just the thought. It never leaves," Aurelia sniffed. "The blood..."

"Shhhh, don't speak of it,"

"But Caspian I can't forget it,"

"Please Aurelia. You're letting it take over your life. There is only so much I can handle of this... this madness,"

Aurelia pulled back from Caspian looking at him in surprise.

"Madness? Only so much you can take?" she exclaimed. "No one is forcing you,"

Caspian held his hand out to mollify Aurelia, trying to calm her, "I didn't say that. But it's been three years Aurelia. I have done a lot for you and never asked anything in return. But enough is enough. I would like my wife to act like a wife,"

Aurelia stared open mouthed at him, trying to make sense of what he was saying. Was he insinuating that he wanted her in more ways than he had let on? As far as she was concerned he was pining after Susan still and she was okay with that. It gave her time to mull over Peter.

But the want in Caspians voice, the longing was something that even she could not ignore. He wanted a wife and he wanted everything that was his right as a husband. Caspian leaned into Aurelia try to put a hand to her cheek but she flinched and turned her face away from him. He sighed and walked around to the other side of the bed, laying down and turning away from her.

"I feel something for you," he whispered, barely loud enough to hear. "It's been three years, Aurelia. How can I not?"

And with one last sigh Caspian blew his candle out and went quiet leaving Aurelia in stunned silence. She turned over, deciding not to address this again until she had thought it over properly. But he was her husband. And the kingdom would be expecting an heir soon. Aurelia blew out her own candle, leaving the room in darkness.