The Liar

Sometimes, he gets scared. Not half scared when he doesn't want to go to a frightening island or when he's fighting a much stronger opponent. Not just scared when dying is something he has to think about. No. Sometimes, Usopp is afraid. He's afraid that he isn't good enough. He's afraid he'll be forgotten. And he had realized that all his life, all his seventeen years, he'd been a nobody to everyone. And the feeling in his stomach now was simply the fear of his own oblivion. It was like he didn't exist.

Ma was like that too. Afraid; of too much and too often from what he remembered. She only stopped being afraid when it was too late. When she was almost gone and her worries were embedded in her son. She worried a lot; feared a lot. And when she grew sick, he noticed that fear had become a poison; and not so much a slow one either. He got it from her; the same fear that killed her. And sometimes, he wondered when it would kill him too.

"Why are you so quiet today?"

He jumps, his heart racing as he stumbles from the side of the Going Merry to stare at Zoro. He hasn't been in this crew for two weeks, but he feels like he knows them. He feels like he belongs there, with the other three. He doesn't know why, but there's a feeling. What he does know is that Zoro isn't the kind of person to just sneak up on someone. He is direct though; straight to the point. Maybe Usopp just didn't hear him coming.

Zoro is macho, dangerous; serious. He's a man that would rather fight it out than talk it out. When he first met the swordsman, Usopp was nothing but satisfied to be on his side. But after a few days of getting to know that quiet 19-year-old, Usopp was just simply glad to be on his side. Not because he was strong and macho and serious and dangerous, but because he was just a kid. All four of them were just kids so eager to start an adventure and make a name for themselves.

Zoro was mysterious and quiet. He liked taking naps. And he liked onigiri too. He also liked hearing Usopp's tales of great Samurais who honored their promises and their families. He very much enjoyed carving statues in his solitude and showing them to separate crew members at different times. And surprisingly, Zoro liked the feel of things; despite how unapproachable he seemed, Zoro enjoyed close relationships rather than a large group of people. And with those close relationships, he let his entire personality become vulnerable. He knew Luffy, Nami, Usopp, and later on Sanji would never intentionally hurt him.

"Konnichiwa?"

Usopp jumps again, but this time he knows it's just Zoro, still standing in his face from moments ago.

"Wha?" He half asks, confused.

"I said 'why are you so quiet today?'"

Usopp sighs, leaning back against the railing of the ship. He doesn't want to talk about his real fears at all. He doesn't want anyone to know that he's afraid of being forgotten or lost and that it's already begun. "I'm always quiet."

"Liar." The statement from Zoro is immediate and Usopp slumps. He is a liar. He just wished he was a better one to these people; the navigator, swordsman, and captain. They know he'll tell a lie before it happens and Usopp's starting to hate that.

Good news though; it's Zoro who's called him out. If it were Nami, she'd threaten his pain out of him. Luffy would give him that very alluring captain stare. But Roronoa Zoro is a master of time and healing. He's often hurt by the stories he tells of Kuina, one he's told to them all on different occasions, and one Usopp notices he'll never tell after Sanji. He asks for time, and his crewmates give it to him. And he returns that sentiment.

Zoro sighs and crosses his arms. "You're scared. I don't know of what, but it's there. So I'll give you some time to think. And I'm -"

He cuts himself off. Yes, Zoro does like being there for his teammates, but he doesn't like to openly say things like 'I'm here if you need me' or 'you can talk to me.' They're givens. He's macho Zoro, he won't say that stuff. And it's a good thing they know him well.

Usopp laughs a little too loudly, something he's always been embarrassed about. "I know, Zoro. You don't have to tell me."

Zoro's brows furrow as he walks away. "Whatever."

Usopp is still laughing to himself when he's alone, so he doesn't notice Luffy come and sit beside him. When he does notice, he isn't really as scared anymore. This crew has little knowledge of personal space and privacy. And that's good. Usopp can't think when he's with someone. He can't think about being forgotten or lost or unloved.

When he does notice Luffy, the black boy sombers a little, ending his giggles with a sigh. They sit in solitude for a moment before Usopp realizes something.

"Aren't you supposed to be helping Nami with the food?"

Luffy shakes his head. "I can help Nami with the food every day. Usopp's scared now."

Usopp freezes. This is bad. If Luffy knows something's bothering him, he'll end up knowing what it is. He doesn't so much as forces it out of Usopp. But there's something about Monkey D. Luffy that makes Usopp tell all. He makes him a wreck, vulnerable to his own fears. And Usopp hates being vulnerable because then he'll look useless and unwanted; easier to be forgotten.

"Did Zoro tell you?"

"No. Just felt it. I always feel when Usopp's hurt."

Usopp frowns at his captain. "Hurt?" He whispers as if they're surrounded.

Luffy nods. "Hurt," He affirms.

"Can you feel it with everyone?"

"Not everyone. Not yet. Just Usopp. He's special." Luffy moves a little closer and it makes Usopp increasingly uncomfortable and hot. Luffy is the epitome of invasion and Usopp knows the captain is well aware of this. He just doesn't care.

Usopp doesn't question the statement. At least not for the right reason. He doesn't ask why Luffy thinks he's so special. Or why Luffy is always acting odd around him. He wonders how the hell he could be special.

Luffy's shoulder rests on his. "What are you afraid of?"

Usopp smiles sheepishly; embarrassed no doubt as he lowers his head. And it all just spills out. "I don't know. Sometimes I get scared. And not just scared, but afraid; horrified. I'm terrified that I'll be forgotten. That I'm being forgotten."

He looks up toward Luffy, whose so close, Usopp's nose is almost poking his and Usopp can feel their breaths ghosting over each other. And instead of moving away, he gives a crooked grin. "I know it's stupid to think that. I'm on a crew with the future pirate king." Luffy blushes. "But sometimes I just get so scared. I don't want to be lost, Luffy. I don't want to be forgotten. I want to live, not just exist. And it's the fear that's going to make that happen, Luffy." He sighs. "Does that make sense? I think my mother was afraid too. And fear is a poison. Not a very slow one either. So the longer I'm afraid, the closer I feel like I am to death without making a name for myself."

"Usopp's not gonna die." They're still looking at one another, so Luffy's breath tickles on his cheek. "It's decided."

"That's not what scares me."

"And I won't forget you either. I won't let people forget you." And then Luffy does something completely unexpected and unlike him. He kisses the end of Usopp's nose. "Usopp's too pretty to be forgotten."

And then he just sits there. Usopp is bewildered and confused. He's shocked and rendered motionless. Luffy just….Luffy just kissed him. On the nose. And called him pretty. And before that, he left Nami in the kitchen to help Usopp. And called him special.

And Usopp realizes something that should have been obvious. He blushes and attempts to hide his face on the railing of the ship.

His heart stops for a millisecond and he laughs. It's a thing. To be so afraid that you can actually laugh. Because now he isn't just scared, or afraid or horrified or terrified. Those are small fears. Now Usopp is petrified. Because if a kiss and being called pretty isn't romantic, he doesn't know what is.

Luffy liked him. Likes him. Usopp's special. By the gods, Luffy likes him.

"Are you okay?" Luffy is still here, unafraid of what comes next.

Usopp thinks about the question. He's just talked about being forgotten. And in return, he's been kissed by Monkey D. Luffy; brave, selfish and selfless, caring, strong, and oddly handsome Monkey D. Luffy. His best friend.

So he smiles softly. He's scared shitless no doubt, but this is a good scared. "Yeah," he whispers. "I'm okay."

"Shishishi. I like Usopp. Can I kiss Usopp again?"

Usopp nods shyly. Luffy likes him.


Luffy loves all his crewmates dearly. He would never choose one over the other. But Usopp doesn't actually notice he's being favored until everyone gets upset with him.

Not really upset. Neither disappointed. There was just a knowing tension not strong enough to break their friendship, but strong enough to leave some hurt.

Luffy is important to everyone. To Nami, he's her best friend. Through Arlong and Enel, never once did Luffy cease to believe in her. Never once did he care about the things she'd done in the past or the things that happened in her past. To Zoro, he's a confident. Zoro and Luffy had started the crew together. Luffy had given Zoro the freedom to follow his own dreams, and for that Zoro had become a loyal servant; bushido. He'd given up his pride for Luffy, and there was no doubt, he'd give up his life. Sanji and Luffy were brothers. And through knowing Luffy, the love-cook had realized that it was okay to love men too. Not romantically, but familiarly. Sanji loved Zeff and he loved Luffy too. Luffy had saved him from himself. Luffy cherishes Sanji, worships what he loves. And for that, the Vinsmoke loved him dearly. To no man does Monkey D. Luffy's approval mean so much as to Chopper. Chopper had always wanted to be seen great in the eyes of Luffy; as a man. Sometimes, he hated being called a monster. But for Monkey D. Luffy, he'd be the most frightening of them.

Luffy saved Robin's life on more than one occasion. First when they were enemies, and then when they were friends. It was a debt that she paid back with friendship and knowledge. Franky had started off rocky with Luffy. To hurt someone so dear to him was one thing, but to hurt Usopp? It was like Franky had committed a crime that was even unforgivable by God. But once Luffy saw that Usopp trusted Franky, then he trusted him too. It was something Franky had always wanted, really; to be accepted and trusted. Luffy held a very special place in Brook's heart, as they both shared the desire to return to Laboon one day. And Luffy was an honorable young man in Brook's eyes. If anyone should change the pirate ere, it should be him.

So, yes, Luffy is dear to everyone. Everyone loves him, everyone wants his approval, everyone wants his attention. And they get it, Usopp swears they get it. But he just didn't know he was that important until Nami called it out.

They're all sitting in the kitchen playing cards. Well Zoro, Franky, Sanji, and Luffy are. The rest of them are just sitting around. Usopp is drunkenly hovering around everyone who is playing, staring at their cards, giving them tips. Luffy's straw hat is on his head, messing up his curls and covering his eyes most of the time, but he doesn't care. He's just happy, after everything with Ceasar and all. He's just happy they're back to normal.

When he gets to Sanji, Usopp smirks. Sanji was really nice during his birthday, so Usopp, the master card player, doesn't mind giving him tips. Usopp puts his chin on Sanji's shoulders. "Throw down when it's your turn. They got nothin," he whispers in his ear.

He can feel the blond man smirk, but before he even has the chance to smile back, Luffy's voice sounds from the other side. It's deep and husky and intriguing….or Usopp's just drunk. One of them. "That's cheating, 'Sopp." Not the nickname. Oh God, not the nickname. When Luffy uses that name, it's going to no doubt be a good night for them.

The brunette stands slowly to look at his captain. Luffy's head is tilted down to his cards, but his eyes are on Usopp, dark and narrowed and intoxicating and wonderful. They look dangerous and ready to pounce. But Usopp just laughs. "I wasn't," he lies. "If you wanted my help, you could have just asked."

Luffy grunts as Usopp comes around to him and rests his head on his shoulder. He looks at Luffy's cards and smiles. It's Luffy's turn. The 19-year-old picked up his card. Usopp smiles, putting his mouth close to the captain's ear. "That's a good card."

Luffy lowers the cards to tilt his head back. His eyes are dazed from the alcohol as he stares at his sniper. "Is it?" And Usopp wonders if they're even talking about the game anymore. But he continues to stare at Luffy. It's a challenge he won't lose.

"Yeah. If you fold now, you'll win. It's called the hero's fold."

"Hey, that's cheating," Nami slyly cries at the other end of the room. The daydream is broken. And the hand that had been inching toward Usopp's thigh ceases movement beneath the table. Usopp bites his lip with furrowed brows. They were just getting somewhere, damnit.

Luffy looks away. "It's not. Usopp doesn't cheat."

Nami giggles as Sanji grows confused. "Oh now it isn't. Is it because he's in your ear or is it because he's your favorite?"

It's a light statement and clearly, Nami meant no offense to it. But the crew goes silent when Usopp does. He doesn't like that word. Favorite was a sick game, sick idea. Favoritism was bad. And Luffy didn't favor him. Luffy loves them all. Luffy would never choose Usopp over anyone else. Usopp doesn't want to be chosen.

So he shakes his head. Yes, Luffy could be smitten at times. And yes, they were each other's first everything. But…. "That's not true. There are no favorites." Zoro laughs genuinely, but Usopp continues to shuffle on his feet. Nami frowns. And Luffy is just staring. He doesn't even deny the claim. In fact, he isn't affected by it. Is he….no. Usopp isn't important. Not more than anyone else at least. "I'm not… we're just…"

That's when they get upset. Not because Usopp actually is favored, but because he didn't know. Nami is more upset at Luffy and she voices why.

"No one's angry about it. You just act like you're scared to admit that. We wouldn't feel any other way."

Usopp snorts. "He won't admit it because there's nothing. I mean, t-t-there is something, but he doesn't favor me. He wouldn't favor me. He protects all of us."

Franky joins the fun. "Bro, you're one of the smartest people I know, so the fact that you don't see it is super."

"See what?"

"Oh, come on, Usopp. The shit's been obvious since your birthday. Luffy even went as far as making a cake that he didn't eat...for you." Sanji reaches into his pocket to light a cigarette, mumbling a 'pardon me' in the process. "It's...cute."

Robin giggles. "Actually since Skypiea when Luffy chose to have sex with Usopp instead of stay at the party." It's a miracle to see Usopp blanch and get as light as Nami. He can't believe they noticed all this. But he still believes in himself. That wasn't Luffy favoring him at all.

"That's late. Try leaving Drum Kingdom. Luffy fought me because he thought I tried to kill Usopp, which was stupid."

Usopp turns to Luffy, who is still focusing on his cards even though the game is over. "You what?!" He asks incredulously. That was stupid. Sure, Zoro might say it on occasion, but he is a Bushido. He would never. Zoro loved them, especially Luffy, Nami, he and Sanji.

Nami skips over the sentiment. "It's been more obvious since Syrup. I saw Luffy dangling from a tree so close to Usopp's face like he was trying to kiss him. But I didn't understand the idea of it all until Luffy cried when Usopp left the crew."

Usopp is so impressed with Nami's skills that he forgets his anger and confusion for a millisecond to say "wow, Nami. That early. You know a lot."

The navigator nods. "I don't think anyone saw earlier than me. I know you all too well." She says this, but points around the table at Sanji, who blushes, Zoro, who shrugs with a smirk, Luffy, who laughs, and finally Usopp, who smiles softly at Nami, knowing exactly what she means. Nami smiles nostalgically too and looks to Robin. "Those boys are my boys. I know everything about them. Even things they don't know themselves."

Usopp notices Chopper shift at that statement, something he does a lot when the first five Straw Hats are together. "I think I noticed when Luffy regretted coming to the Grand Line. I know, right? Luffy wouldn't regret his decisions on the adventure, but he was so angry that Usopp got sick for the first time. And he wished you all were back in East Blue. Because it was simpler."

"It was." Zoro makes that statement and Usopp nods his head. "We were younger and Usopp wasn't the only one that was scared-"

"Hey!"

"- We were inexperienced, really. But had we never made it to reverse mountain, we wouldn't have gotten the chance to get stronger. And when you look at the five of us, we did get stronger. Right, Usopp?"

Usopp thinks about Little Garden, Miss Merry Christmas, Perona, Luffy, Heracles and everyone else. He smiles and nods at the swordsman, pulling Luffy's hat down over his eyes. "Right." And then he goes back to the issue at hand. "No, but in all seriousness, Luffy doesn't favor me. Tell em, Luffy."

They look toward their captain, who's staring at Usopp with an unreadable expression. Large eyes: sucked in teeth. Stubborn and unwilling. Usopp shakes his head in disbelief. "Luffy," he scolds. "Tell them."

Luffy picks up another card even though that's not how the game is played. He looks at Usopp, who doesn't understand what's taking so long. Why can't he just say it? 'I don't favor Usopp over any of you' is such an easy phrase. He stares at Usopp for a long while before looking away. "I'm not going to lie to anyone, Usopp."

The black boy's head tilts and the curls on the opposite side of his submit to gravity, imprisoning his face. "What do you me-"

Nami throws up her hands, a big smile on her face. "Yay! Not much of a confession, but it's a start."

The rest of the crew claps and cheers, but Usopp is still staring at Luffy. Still waiting for his denial. Still wishing it weren't true. He doesn't want that. He doesn't want Luffy to ever think about him before anything or anyone else. That's scary.

And sometimes he gets scared. Not half scared when he doesn't want to go to a frightening island or when he's fighting a much stronger opponent. Not just scared when dying is something he has to think about. No. Sometimes, Usopp is afraid. Horrified. Terrified. Petrified. And without saying a word, the sniper leaves the kitchen biting his fingernails and thinking thinking thinking. He inhales the air deeply as if he's just been held by the throat, intoxicated by death. As if he were being reborn.

The 19-year-old blinks rapidly before falling against the railing of Sunny. And he bursts out in tears. He doesn't know why he's crying and he doesn't understand why he's upset. Maybe it isn't just Luffy choosing him. Maybe it's the fact that he was chosen that scares him. Maybe he'd spent so much time wanting people to notice him, that it scares him when they do.

"Usopp?"

The sniper turns around quickly and once finding Luffy there, he puts his head down in shame. The tears make his face wet and he shuffles back and forth with his hands interlocked. "Luffy," he whispers. "I-I-I….I'm scared."

Luffy smiles and comes closer. He pushes the hat down on Usopp's head, something he'd do himself when he wanted away from the world. And he whispers faintly to his lover two words. Two words that reassure Usopp that it's okay to not know why he was sad or confused. Because Luffy already knows. "I know." And then he swoops the other in, hugging him tightly around his waist and shoulder blades.

"But why?" Usopp asks. Why should he be afraid just because Luffy favors him? Why is it making his chest heavy with tears?

The Monkey laughs softly. "I can love more than two things at once. I love meat and my family. And Sanji and Nami and Zoro and…." He continues on all the way to Brook. "And I love the One Piece and adventure. Doesn't mean I stop loving these things just a little less. Just means I love Usopp most."

"So you wouldn't give up your dreams for me? You would never hurt anyone for my benefit?" Usopp asks hopefully.

"Right. But I would change things. If Usopp wanted to wait ten years to find the One Piece instead of now, we would. If Usopp wants to go to Little Garden, Nami has to turn around and set a course. If you're sick, everything stops until you're better. Ain't no way Usopp is missing anything because he's sick. Hungry; Sanji has to make the best meal for you."

That makes Usopp laugh and look up. When he does, they're just standing there; Luffy wiping his eyes and Usopp just smiling like a fool. "You have it in your mind to spoil me rotten."

Luffy kisses his nose and then his eyelids and then his mouth. "Anything for Usopp. I love Usopp."

Usopp laughs softy, so it comes out as an ugly snort. Luffy smiles and kisses him again. "I love you too. Dearly. You're everything."

"Liar."

"Huh?"

"You are."


The King

When Monkey D. Luffy is six years old, he finds his first crew member. Well, he doesn't necessarily find him or see him for that matter, but he's made up his mind and no one can take that away from him.

When he gets older, Usopp, the so-called and so-named son of the great Yasopp, is going to be on his pirate crew. Nami is going to be the first he sees, and Zoro is who he will seek out first, but Luffy already knows 11 years prior that he isn't getting on the grand line until he goes to Syrup Village and captures Usopp.

Usopp is only his age, but he's so cool. Yasopp already taught him how to shoot before he left, so by the time Luffy arrives in Syrup, he knows Usopp is going to be cooler than his dad. He's willing to bet that Usopp will be able to do much cooler things like shoot fireballs or pebbles or even flowers. He laughs to himself at six, thinking about how cool and weird it would be to shoot flowers at people.

But he knows Usopp, who's already his sniper and just doesn't know it yet, can pull something like that off. Someone like Usopp is kind-hearted. Very nice and at six, Luffy knows the world doesn't deserve him. Yasopp said that an old man in Syrup had lost his wife and was crying on his porch when Usopp had gone over and sat on his lap the whole day. When he returned, they had asked him what he said to the old man. Usopp had told his father 'nothing.' That he'd just helped him cry. He's a good person. And Shanks says you need good people on your crew, with hearts of gold.

He can't wait until he's big enough. He and Usopp will go everywhere - ice kingdoms, water kingdoms, the sky - and then they'll find the One Piece.

"Why are you so quiet, Anchor?"

He looks up from his juice and upon finding all attention on him, the six-year-old smiles. "When I'm older, I want Usopp to be on my crew!" He declares this with power as if it's already set in stone and there's no other way the world could shift.

Shanks' crew grow quiet, some laughing, some just smiling at him. It's Yasopp who's confused as he asks "My son? Usopp? My boy?"

Luffy sucks in his teeth and nods affirmatively; stubbornly. He doesn't want Yasopp to say no because Grandpa says kids have to listen to their parents and elders. What if Yasopp says no and Usopp can't sail? What if-

Yasopp bursts out laughing and so do the rest of the red-haired pirates. Luffy stares before his brows furrow and he blushes. They're always laughing. Shanks' crew is never serious. And Usopp joining his crew is a serious matter.

"Bwahaha! You and Usopp on a pirate crew? You little runts wouldn't last a day on the seas."

Luffy snarls. "Yes, we will! We're going to get to Raftel! You'll see. I'm going to be King of the Pirates and Usopp's going to be King of the Snipers, the bravest man ever. Even braver than you, meathead!"

The pirates calm down and Yasopp rests his chin on his palm. He then smiles at Luffy for a long time and Luffy, who is just six, doesn't know what a smile of pride is. "The Pirate King. King of the Snipers, you say? And how do you know that's going to happen?"

Luffy crosses his arms. "Because I said so."

He's ready to argue about this until the Pub closes. He has valid points on just why Usopp belongs by his side and him by Usopp's. Yasopp smiles and looks down. "Okay," He says. And then again as if Luffy didn't hear. "Okay."


When Monkey D. Luffy is seven years old, his older brother Sabo is mean for the first time. Sabo is never mean to him; not like stupid Ace at least. Sabo is smart and teaches him how to be 'as well behaved as you can get, Luffy.' He also knows how to cook better than he and Ace and he always makes sure their clothes are clean even though they live in the jungle. Because of Sabo, he knows how to wear a tie, use kitchen utensils, read, clean, bathe, and most importantly who should be on his pirate crew besides Ace, the first mate, and Sabo, the navigator.

Sabo is a worthy mean to Luffy - scolding him as scolding should often be done. Not a bashing mean like stupid Ace, always telling him he can't hang out with them or calling him weak. Stupid Ace. But one day, weeks before his birthday, Luffy makes Sabo really angry.

When he's seven, he learns that people can get so angry that they cry. They can get so choked up with upset and anger and enough being enough that they just cry. That's what Sabo does when he actually gets angry.

Luffy is seven. He doesn't realize his mistakes until it's too late and the damage is done. It's two weeks before his birthday and Luffy is being nice to everyone, even Dadan and the bandits. Ace doesn't care because Luffy hasn't whined in days. But Sabo is curious. No matter how he tries, Luffy can never really be nice to the mountain bandits. It's not in his nature. And Luffy should have known Sabo would know his brother. It isn't until Luffy unexpectedly hugs Dogra and tells him he loves the man that it happens.

When Dogra is gone, Sabo sits next to his brother. "Luffy, what's gotten into you lately?" He's unconsciously put his arm around Luffy's shoulders as he always does. Ace is at their table, eating and laughing under his breath.

The boy smiles. "What?"

"Why are you being so nice to people? Telling everyone you love them?"

Luffy is confused at first. He had no idea there was something wrong with that; telling people he loved them. Didn't Sabo say love should be spread?

"I do love Sabo and sometimes Ace." A piece of meat hits his head and they turn to see Ace glaring at Luffy.

Sabo laughs jovially and Luffy smiles. Sabo was always so happy and unbothered. When he's seven, Luffy decides that it's Sabo's smile that is the best smile. "I know that. I mean why are you saying it so much, especially to Dadan and the bandits and everyone around grey terminal."

And then the Monkey's eyes light up. He understands the question now. "My birthday is coming up."

Ace and Sabo stare at him for a moment before Sabo stands. His eyes are narrowed in pure confusion and suspicion before he asks "what?"

Luffy spreads his arms. "I want everyone to get me a lot of meat and a lot of presents for my birthday."

Again, Luffy is seven. He doesn't understand the danger of his actions and how fake love can scar people on the inside. He isn't thinking about Sabo's stupid father, who they learned of before. He's not thinking about how the man pretended to love Sabo in the eyes of the public or only when he wanted Sabo to follow his wishes; take over the family business. He's only thinking that what he's doing is okay.

Sabo is just standing there now, his head lowered so they can't see his eyes. Ace calls his name quietly and cautiously.

And then it happens. Sabo's fist comes down on Luffy harder than anything he's ever felt. The boy flies backward and knocks into the wall. When he lifts to stare at Sabo bewilderedly, the tears are already at the corners of his eyes. Sabo never hit him. Sabo would never do that to Luffy. Not like Ace. So the boy who is seven is confused, hurt, and betrayed.

When Monkey D. Luffy is seven, in that room, he felt exactly how his older brother did. "Why'd you hit me, Sabo?"

Sabo's voice is full of venom when he speaks and looks up. Full of venom, but it doesn't match his eyes that are full of blue tears. "How could you be so stupid? How could you think like that Luffy? How could you do that to people?"

And then it hits him. Hard. Harder than that punch and Luffy looks down. He doesn't fully understand it, but he knows Sabo is used to that kind of thing. To feel loved only for it to all be a game; a joke; an advantage. That was the thing about Sabo. Even when he wasn't facing injustice, he always felt compelled to be righteous.

"I'm sorry, Sabo." And he really is. He didn't mean to hurt his brother's feelings.

"You better damn well be! You hear me! That's not right, Lu! You don't do that. You don't love people in hopes of a reward, Luffy. You love them unconditionally. There's no reason to love somebody. Do you understand?"

Luffy nods. He understands then. He understands completely. When he's seven, his brother teaches him how to properly love someone. And when he meets Usopp, he thanks the late Sabo graciously and each night when he speaks to the stars.


When Monkey D. Luffy is eleven, he wants that love returned. For all the love that Sabo taught him to give, Luffy wants it back.

Not from everyone. He isn't greedy and love is free. He knows Sabo loved him dearly and Ace, Grandpa, and Dadan too even if it was hard to show. But he knows he'll always have that love. The kind of love he wants is the love of Makino has - when she stares at a photo of her and Shanks.

Yes, Luffy, who didn't know a thing about love until Sabo gets angry with him, wants something romantic. When he gets older, he wants all of that. A soulmate and the One Piece and to be free.

"Hey, Makino?" The boy sits before his tutor and she stops staring at her pictures.

"Yes, Luffy?"

"What's a soulmate?"

Makino laughs behind her hand. "Well, a soulmate is someone who is meant for you."

"Meant for me?"

"They suit you," She goes on. "Out of all the people in the world, your soulmate should be someone who gets you. Understands you. They can say things to you without moving their mouths."

"Soulmates have devil fruits?"

Makino laughs again. Luffy is eleven, but he doesn't know a thing about romantic love. "No, Luffy."

The boy sighs, exasperated and exhausted from having to think about all that. "Then what is a soulmate? How do you know that a person is your soulmate?"

"Luffy?"

"Yeah?"

"Your soulmate is going to be someone you're willing to give all your meat to."

"All my meat? No way!" Makino is crazy to think that. Luffy would never give up his meat for anyone. There are too many different kinds, too many different flavors to have all to himself. Never.

Once more, the woman laughs. It's her thing to find stupidity and innocence funny. "Luffy, you won't have a choice."

"Yes, I will!"

When Monkey D. Luffy is eleven, he doesn't know how wrong he is. Because when he gets older, not only is he going to share his meat with a certain sniper, he's going to end up loving that soulmate a lot more than meat.


When Monkey D. Luffy is fourteen, he gets left behind. For real and for good. Sabo died when he was younger, leaving Luffy partially alone when he wasn't supposed to. And seven years later, Ace leaves too; ready for an adventure and to be free. It's the same night that Luffy goes through it. He's back at the Mountain Bandits' hideout and it hits him. The loneliness he hasn't felt since before he met Ace and Sabo.

He had fallen onto his cot, sniveling like a cry baby. And he remembers that this was the only time throughout his boyhood when loneliness had actually reduced him to tears. And he thinks of Ace fighting other pirates and Sabo finding peace wherever he had landed and he cries. For the living and the dead, Luffy cries at fourteen. It isn't being left behind, it's the loneliness it takes to understand that. He didn't want Ace to leave. He didn't want Sabo to die. He wants to be surrounded in smothered in the love he knows nothing about.

At the tender age of fourteen, Luffy finds out he very much dislikes the loneliness of space; the sense of being forgotten by the world. And because he doesn't like being forgotten or left behind or lonely, he begins to understand how it feels. He remembers how it feels. And Luffy vows that he'll save everyone he can from loneliness. If he ever has to save anyone he'll ever love he wants to save them from that. And he'll have the power and the knowledge to do so. He'd been through the worst kind of loneliness there was. To be completely surrounded and yet feel incredibly isolated.

So when Usopp, his dearest Usopp, wonders why Luffy is so good at making him feel better, Luffy will tell him how he was fourteen once. And how much he understands.


When Monkey D. Luffy is seventeen, he falls in love. He met him on a small island, not big enough to make a name for itself. It's biggest name would come in two years time, in the form of a bloodied God who was brave enough to go against everything that Doflamingo had worked toward.

It's the boy Luffy has been seeking for over ten years. Not to fall in love with him; not to be his soulmate. Those weren't his plans, at least not at first. He had been looking for a crewmate, a sniper from his childhood dreams that could shoot flowers.

And he finds him. It's not until a week later that he falls in love with him. The two had hit it off instantly, so they often spend most of their time together. After Usopp joins the crew, when Luffy is seventeen, and about a week later, they're irresponsibly drinking on the Going Merry's deck as they sing loudly. Nami and Zoro are being boring and actually sleeping at two AM. But Usopp is cool. He stays up with Luffy and he doesn't care about being loud. He doesn't care about stumbling as he dances like a clown because Luffy's doing it too. They're knocking against one another, slinging their arms around each other's hot shoulders

Luffy is seventeen. He's a growing boy, but he thinks it's the alcohol making his stomach drop when Usopp steals his hat and puts it over his curls. He should be angry. It's his precious hat, and he has a promise on that hat, but the alcohol is telling him it looks so good.

So Usopp is on the crew. It's a week after. It's two AM. Luffy is seventeen. And after the alcohol becomes too much, he has to hold Usopp's hair as the other teen vomits in the toilet. Usopp's hair isn't even as long as it will be, but it still gets in his eyes and his mouth when it isn't wrapped up.

He stands there holding Usopp's hair for what feels like decades, his own vision going in and out from the drinks. And then it happens. Usopp stops vomiting and continues to cough. He wipes his mouth with the back of his arm and he does it.

He turns his head to smile at Luffy, plump wet lips emphasizing his still white teeth. His eyes are squinted shut, so his long eyelashes are invading his cheeks. "Thanks, Luffy," he says.

And Luffy is sober. Just for that frozen moment when Usopp is more imperfect and beautiful than he's seen him, he's sober. His hand slightly tightens around his friend's hair and he just wants to pull him close.

That's when he knew. He knew he loved Usopp then, but Usopp didn't know. He didn't know because Luffy had froze for a millisecond and proceeded to play it cool.

Makino was right. Falling in love could be achieved in a single word; a single glance.

Ace was partially right. Falling in love was an imagination. But genuinely falling in love was an act of the imagination.

And Luffy wants to yell to Sabo, wherever he is, that it's real. Love is real. But, he's just staring at Usopp thinking how amazing it was the world carried so many lives. How amazing that you could fall in love with anyone. And how amazing it was that he found Usopp first.


When Monkey D. Luffy is eighteen, he feels guilt for the first time. On Rusukaina, training is his first priority. The 48 season island with its dangerous animals isn't something that he shouldn't focus on. Getting stronger so that he will never have to lose anyone again is his top priority. No doubt. But occasionally, he will think about his crew; where they are and if they're getting stronger too. He wonders where they put their bodies and how they cope inside them, knowing that their crew is out there, alone.

Luffy prays from them. He had never been religious growing up, but occasionally, he prays for them. He hopes Sanji and Zoro a perfecting their fighting styles. He hopes Chopper and Nami are perfecting their one of a kind skills. He hopes Brook and Robin are learning and he hopes Franky is getting stronger. But most of all he prays for Usopp. It makes him feel guilty like he doesn't love the rest of his crew. But he knows he does. No doubt, he does. But focusing on Usopp and praying for his wellbeing more made his stomach feel bloated and his heart empty. It was ironic, really. To have that much love for a man only to feel so empty and cold.

A staff interrupts his thoughts as it swings near his head. Luffy ducks down to dodge it.

"Pay attention," Rayleigh demands from behind.

Luffy's bare foot slides of the rock he's meditating on and touches the icy snow. He shivers, now realizing that he's butt ass naked in winter. He glares at Rayleigh. "I was. I dodged that."

"You weren't supposed to dodge it. You were supposed to meet it." At the declaration, Luffy blushes in embarrassment and Rayleigh's eyes narrow. "What are you thinking about, now? Is it Usopp again?"

Rayleigh knows all about his crew, as they've lived with each other for a year. He especially knows about Usopp; Usopp and Luffy….together. He knows that Luffy training is important, but he doesn't take away his personal life. Not when Luffy still needs it.

Instead, the old man looks up at the cloudy sky, down at the melting snow, and then back up. "Well, looks like the season's changing again," he mutters casually. Luffy looks up and yelps when he feels the hot acid on his toes. And then the green stuff just starts pouring down, trying to burn his flesh. This season again; Acid Spring. Rayleigh steps back, dodging well. "You know what to do. Use your Haki. I'll see you in a week."

And both teacher and student split up. Luffy runs as fast as he can through the jungle, using his Haki to detect the acid and dodge it. He stops when he reaches a cave. It's dark on the inside, but he can see them. Hear them. Whatever animalistic growls these glowing blue eyes are letting off. It wouldn't have been easy. Nothing is ever easy on Rusukaina. He thinks of Usopp again and breathes deeply.

He's alive. And he knows because of the guilt. It's the guilt that keeps him going. It was impossible not to blame himself for his favoritism, but even the guilt was a comfort. It was a human feeling. A sign that he was still attached to the world that other people lived in.

Luffy glares inside the cave, the acid hitting his back lightly now. "Second gear," he whispers. The animals growl. Usopp is still in mind. And Luffy prays. He prays Usopp doesn't have to ever go through anything like this without him. "Help him, God. Damn me and everyone else. We deserve it, yes, but let him live forever. Let Usopp live forever, please."


Lusopp is everything. Anyway, that's chapter two for you. It's when Usopp himself notices the unconscious favoritism Luffy has for him. And no surprise, he's afraid. And when Luffy himself realizes. I hoped you like how Luffy's life kind of shaped him into loving Usopp.

The two scenes are when Usopp finds out Luffy likes him and when he finds out he's favored. Notice the shift of fears. First Usopp is afraid to be forgotten and then afraid that he isn't.

He always worried that someone wouldn't notice him. And then when they did, he felt afraid. And Luffy. Dear God, Luffy. It was something to write his feelings on love and guilt especially. Well, I hope you guys like this chapter. Thanks for reading. Don't forget to review.