WARNING - Some sort of depression. Please do give a review about what you think I should do. I've written in the end.

April

I don't know why I left that guy without helping him. I barely remember his face. I should have helped him, this is unlike me. I'm not the one who hurts others. Maybe I should call him. I should focus on the road for now or I'm going to hit someone again.

"Where the fuck is your phone? Why didn't you pick up my call?" asks Arizona.

"Oh! So it was you! I ran into some trouble thanks to your phone call." I reply getting out of the car and check out the front bumper. Just some minor dents and scratches.

"So now it's my fault? I can't believe you're actually saying that you spoiled brat." she retorts. "Not now, Ari" I say and head inside. "What happened Apes? she asks.

Everyone thinks I'm a brat because my mother's rich but no one realizes that I don't need money. I need love. If they only step in my shoes for a single day maybe they would realize.

"I hit a guy with my car and I ran away from there." I say rushing to class.

"You didn't stop to help him? Wow!" she looks at me shocked. "You are the kind of girl who helps a squirrel even if it is fine and you left that poor boy bleed to death all by himself? Oh my God the end is near!" her sarcasm speaking.

"Thanks Ari! You're really helping. He was fine! At least he looked fine. I don't know! I have his number though. I'm gonna call him up later."

"You hit him with your car and now you're gonna hit on him? Nice Apes! Real nice!" she says grinning trying to make me laugh. I do chuckle at how hard she is trying.

First up is Biology. Which I hate really, my mother is the one who enrolled me in it. I wanted to major in business. I wanna be a businesswoman, own my company, lead!

"Hey, You!!" I hear an excited voice, never heard before, but it takes me aback. I turn around staring at what I see.

Jackson

It's her. I can't believe my eyes. Though I've just seen her once. It's like she is tattooed into my mind. I see her beautiful red hair just slightly flowing because of the wind. She is wearing an off shoulder top, black in color with regular jeans. It really suits her. I can't contain my excitement and call out to her "Hey, you!!". She turns around pretty shocked and I can see her eyes shifting left to right so fast. Clearly she is nervous.

"So now you decide to speak Mr. ? I thought you were dumb." she asks.

And... I'm at a loss of words again. "I'm... Uh... I'm dumb" I say to her foolishly.

"Is this him? He is hot!!" says a blonde who is with her. The redhead shushes her.

"What the hell is wrong with you Jackson? You're speaking already. He is stupid not dumb." Mark hits my head annoyed.

"You shouldn't have jumped the signal like that Jackson. What if something happened to you? I'd be in trouble. What about your family... " she goes on speaking, her voice fading.

I just smile and nod not hearing what she is saying. My mind is focused on the way her lips move. So pink, so plump. I could kiss her right now to shut her beautiful mouth but that's not what good boys are taught to and I've no idea how to kiss. I've never kissed anyone before.

Mark pulls me away from her as the cIass is gonna start.

"Apes we gotta go or we'd not get any place to sit." the blonde says.

Apes! She called her Apes. Short for Apple? Sounds weird to keep Apple as a name. But she is red like an Apple. Hmm... APRIL! Could be April. I guess I've to gather all my courage to ask her name.

"My name is Derek, I'm your Biology Professor...I'd like you all to introduce yourselves and tell me why you chose Biology" I turn around to find her. I can't see her anywhere and then I spot her way down at the first bench.

Everyone says their names and about their family and background. And then she gets up and says "Hello everyone. My name is April Kepner." I'm happy that I guessed her name right. "My mother's a surgeon and this was her idea" she says with a tint of sadness in her voice and sits.

More students introduce themselves. Finally it's my chance "Hey everyone, my name is Jackson Avery. My mother's name is Catherine. I'm a Christian. It's my mother's dream that I become a doctor one day and now it's mine to achieve it." she turns around to look at me I look at her back.

"And I can speak." I say and everyone bursts out laughing but all I can see is that April's sadness has been replaced with a smile that lit up the whole room. She should smile more often and the world would be a better place to live in already.

"Really? Who would've knew you could speak?! Let's continue the class. Welcome everyone." the Professor jokes. After the class is over April disappears again.

"Dude you got hit by a girl?" Mark asks at the cafeteria.

"She came out of nowhere. I didn't have any choice."

"She was screaming at you like you jumped a red light?!"

"Did she say that?!" I stare unknowingly. "But it was a green light I remember clearly"

"Then why didn't you say her it was her fault. Dude are you okay? Should we go to the hospital again to get you checked? You've been behaving weirdly. Did you hit your head? Are you concussed?"

We did head to a hospital on the way before. I had just sprained my leg. No big deal and I don't have the liberty not to attend my first class. Seeing her made me forget my pain anyway.

"Nah I'm okay. Let's head out." as we are about to go I see her and her friend coming towards me.

April

I see him talking to his friend. His name is Jackson. There's something about his eyes, they're a brilliant blue, just like the morning sky. They're just so calm and composed. I feel like I could get lost in the vastness of his eyes.

"Hey Jackson! I'm really sorry about earlier. I'm April and this is Arizona. I shouldn't have blasted off on you like that." I say with a smile filled with guilt.

"Hi. You've got a nice name. It's ok you don't have to be sorry you know. It was my fault."

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me Jackson? You said it was a green light. Listen up girl, my friend here is out of his mind. But I ain't. It was totally and completely your fault." His friend points at me frustrated.

"Hey Mark don't use such a crude language in front of girls. And stop pointing fingers. It's not polite. Don't mind him he is angry. He is right though it was a green light. You jumped the signal." he says smiling.

I don't remember seeing the traffic light. It could very well be my fault. "Oh I'm really sorry. I didn't know. How is your bike?" I say ashamed of myself for not knowing the truth.

I like him. He is well behaved and doesn't get angry. Must be his Christian upbringing.

"It's ok. My bike is dead. Don't worry. Oh sh... I gotta go. Nice meeting you April" he hurries off.

I wave and he is long gone. He is off in such a hurry. Maybe someone's waiting for him. Ari pulls me "If you're done staring at his ass we should leave."

"Yes Ari! I was staring at his perfect ass. You jealous? I thought you were into girls... actually... girl... Callie!" I see her cheeks turn red when I say Callie.

I'm back at home. I gather my guts to speak to my mother about the accident. She is definitely gonna freak, call me names even. Even after so many years I haven't gotten used to her anger. It still hurts me.

I go into the kitchen to make dinner. I hear the door open and close loudly.

"April Kepner what's the dent on your front bumper? Are you trying to sabotage your medical career before you've even started? You're not going to achieve anything by fooling around with your friends April. You've gotta be serious in your life. Don't make me regret giving you birth. I'm putting up with your shit since the day you were born. I should never have given you my name. You're just like your father. USELESS! WORTHLESS!!"

My eyes fill up. There's a pool forming in my eyes. I can't breathe. I'm suffocating. Her words stab my heart as they replay in my head a million times. I rub upstairs and slam the door close. I fall on my bed and cry, sobbing uncontrollably. I don't know why she has to say that everytime. Does she hate me? Did she not need me? Why did she give birth to me if she didn't want me? Maybe I am worthless and useless like my father. I've never met the man. My mind is filled with so many questions. I roll up my sleeves and stare. Not thinking anymore. I've a sudden urge. I shift to the side of my bed and open my drawer.

The next minute is blank to me. I don't feel anything. No pain. Blood forming a line, dripping from where I've cut myself just now. Tears turned into anger. Suffocation slowly disappearing. My phone lights up.

"HEY APRIL, IT'S ME JACKSON. YOU OK? I'M SORRY FOR RUNNING OFF"

P. S - I'm really sorry if you don't like me adding a bit of depression. Self harming is NOT GOOD but I have to send out a message for young girls out there who still do it that it's not SAFE. NOTHING GOOD COMES OUT OF IT. I've been fighting with depression all my life and I'm gonna write up how I fought with it through April. I hope it would help someone. But if you don't want me to continue with it I'm not going to mention it again I promise. I'll edit it out.