Track 2
When we last left the band they had crashed to a mysterious island and lucky for them they are to brutal to die that easily. Dark smoke and ashes mixed with metallic bits flows over the very still plane. Suddenly the stillness is interrupted by the large door is kicked open and clear off the hinges. Loud coughing is heard as Nathan steps out into the glaring sunlight.
Nathan:"Fuck! That hurt my foot... stupid door! (looks around) Uhhhh where are we?"
Murderface:"Did anyone see my pants?"
Pickles:"Dude, where did your pants go?"
Murderface:"If I knew, would I be asking you? Asshole...geez!"
Toki:"Helps mes, I'm is stuck!"
Nathan:"Sorry Toki but we need to chop your arm off."
Toki:"Whats the fuck! My leg is whats is trapped, Natan."
Nathan:"Yeah but I'm bored and pissed and cutting off your arm will help ease my pain. Don't be so selfish Toki!"
Skwisgaar:"Yeahs Toki, yous only thinks of youselfs. What abouts us? Wees have sand in our boots buts yous nice and comfutables inside."
Toki:"Screws yous all!"
Pickles:"Dude, we're like on an island."
Murderface:"So what? It's mocking us with its' coconut trees! Makes me wanna kill myself right now and make them watch, thos sons of bi... sweet, I found my pants!"
Toki:"Hey! Those are mines pants! Ands I still wearing dems!"
Skwisgaar:"See? Like we says, selfkish!"
Murderface:"Gimmie!"
Toki finally slips loose but the inertia from Murderface pulling on his pants sends Toki face first into the sand.
Toki:"Hmmmmm, tastes likes da chickens.."
Nathan:"Really? Fuckin' sweet!"
Murderface:"Mine! I claim this sand!"
Pickles:"Back off, fattie! This is mine."
All five of them scoop up and gobble down as much sand as they can before realizing it sucks and spitting it back up.
Nathan:"That tastes nothing like chicken, you dildo!"
Murderface:"I can feel it fighting with my spleen right now."
Toki:"Yous didn't let mes finish. Is means it tastes likes chicken butts."
Murderface takes another bite.
Murderface:"Hmmmm I think he's right."
Nathan:"So what the hell do we do now? The sun is seering my flesh... also I need a toilet."
Pickles:"Dude, I told you to go before we left."
Murderface:"Fuck it, use that tree."
Skwisgaar:"Yas, Fuck it."
Nathan:"Yeah... what the hell."
Toki:"Looks whats found I? A orange guns, we cans shoots down da plane and use it to flys out ofs heres."
Murderface:"Gimmie! I need to shoot something before I freak out and go on a rampage!"
Pickles:"Dude, shooting stuff and running around with a gun IS going on a rampage!"
Murderface:"Show me the dick that died and made you a rampage expert."
Nathan:"Damn! Now my ass hurts."
Pickles:"What did you wipe with?"
Nathan:"Ummmmmmm... a pinecone... but it was hard to do cuz that stupid thing wouldn't stop moving."
Murderface:"That was a rat."
Skwisgaar:"A mad stinky rats now, Ha!"
Toki:"Yeah, hims not happy nows."
Nathan:"Damn I hate tours! This is brutal!"
Pickles:"Dude, we need to like signal a plane or something."
Murderface's cell phone blares across the beach.
Murderface:"... THERE'S my pants! It's my damned grandma! Fuck it!"
He tosses it far into the depths of the ocean while the rest of the band watch with their collective mouths wide open.
Nathan:"What the fuck, Murderface!? We could have used that to call for help."
Murderface:"Well you're the didlos who didn't bring your dethphones so don't yell at me, plus when I hear her voice I just wanna kill something so I'll feel better."
Nathan:"This sand is totally pissing me off."
Toki:"Lets go gets wasted! Thats always make us happys."
Dude, our booze burned in the plane!"
Skwisgaar:"Dammit, wees need immflamamabiale... not flamable alcohols."
Toki:"Den lets gos to stabucks."
Pickles:"This is a freakin' island, Toki! Nothing is here ya douchebag!"
Toki:"But deys everywheres."
Murderface smacks Toki knocking a tooth out."
Toki:"Owwww! What a dick!"
Murderface:"Don't blame me, you had it coming."
Nathan:"He's right."
Skwisgaar:"Yas."
Pickles:"Dude, he is totally right."
Toki:"Yeahs..."
Toki rubs his jaw then follows the rest into the jungle.
