Disclaimer: MWAHAHA! I WILL NEVER SAY IT!

Lawyers: ehem…remember the court order…

Me: crap…--; fine! I don't own 'em and I never will! There! You happy?

Lawyers: -

Notes: I don't own the songs unless I say differently.

Queer Eye For The Straight Guy

CHAPTER 1: The New Guy…

Inuyasha's POV-

I was getting things ready for my new roommate when a knock came to my door. Sango stood in the doorway with a broad grin on her face. "Hey Inuyasha! So…any news on the new guy? Do you know anything yet?" She asked. She saw his picture in the office files (she has a part-time secretary/file-er job in the school office) and instantly fell for him.

"You would know more than I. You have access to Kai's private files." I looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "All I know is he will be here today and that he is a human.."

Sango sighed. "Can I at least be here when he comes…I wanna meet him!" She was anxious and I sighed and nodded.

"Awww Sango! What about me?" My perverted friend, Miroku, chose that moment to walk in. Sango glanced at him. "What about you?" I shook my head.

Miroku grabbed her hand. "Why can't you just give me a chance? You are my one and only…" Sango didn't give him a chance to finish when she slapped him. "Hands off the ass." She fumed. I laughed. "Be quiet, Inuyasha." Miroku rubbed his cheek with a glowing handprint.

"Umm…ehem…excuse me…this wouldn't happen to be dorm A room 317, would it?" A young man stood in the doorway. He was shortish and had short black hair. His brown eyes had an unusual look to them and his features were soft. He adjusted his pack on his shoulder and looked at the three bickering people. I opened my mouth to reply but Sango beat me by a mile.

"Yes. You must be Kai! Nice to meet you! My name is Sango and I'm a junior here!" She shook his hand rapidly. He looked taken aback. "Er…thanks? Pleasure is all mine."

Sango smiled happily. "This is Miroku, and this strapping young half-demon is Inuyasha, your roommate." She introduced Miroku and I without looking back at us. Kai blushed slightly when he looked at me and looked down. "Nice to meet you all." He looked uncomfortable and Sango must've sensed it because she grabbed Miroku and waved while making her way out the door, leaving us.

"Hi. Just bring your stuff in. That is your side of the room and this is mine. We share the fridge and the TV and bathroom." I tried to make him more at ease but he just stared. "They, uh, didn't tell me I would have a roommate." He stuttered. His voice was light, almost girlie.

"Eh, that is like them to do that." I shrugged, not getting the big deal. He nodded slightly and pulled his trunk inside. He unpacked very neatly and I watched with a raised eyebrow as Kai folded his clothes neatly and hung up skateboarding posters and MCR and other posters. He was kinda feminine for a guy in punk/skater/goth clothes. "So, where you from?" I tried to make light conversation with my new roomie.

"I'm from Tokyo originally, but I moved here from Yokohama." He answered, not exactly grasping the 'small talk' idea. I stared at him and tried to think of something else to say. "I see…" Was all that popped into my head. He just nodded and continued.

"Er…ummm…Wanna soda?" I raised an eyebrow. He was odd. "Yea thanks dude." He answered softly without looking. I walked over to the fridge and pulled out two Pepsi bottles and handed him one. Kai smiled slightly and sipped the syrupy liquid.

I looked out the window and walked over to the radio. "Whaddya like to listen to?" Kai looked up at the posters and thought for a second. "I like any music 'cept classical." He laughed. I smiled and nodded, flipping on the stereo. My Chemical Romance blared through the speakers:

"well if you wanted honesty

that's all you had to say

I never want to let you down or have you go

it's better off this way

for all the dirty looks

the photographs your boyfriend took

remember when you broke your foot

from jumping out the 2nd floor

I'm not okay, I'm not okay, and I'm not okay

you wear me out

what will it take to show you that it's not the life

it seems

I've told you time and time again

you sing the words but

don't know what it means

to be a joke and look

another line without a hook

I held you close as we both shook

for the last time-take a good hard look

I'm not okay, I'm not okay, and I'm not okay

you wear me out

forget about the dirty looks

the photographs your boyfriend took

you said you're read me like a book

but the pages are all torn and frayed

now I'm okay, I'm okay...

I'm okay now, I'm okay now,

what do you really want from me

because I'm telling you the truth

I'm okay, trust me

I'm not okay, I'm not okay, I'm not okay

I'm not o-fucking kay!…"

Kai was enjoying the song I could tell by the way he sat down on his bed and grinned and he looked like he wanted to stand up and headbang. I laughed as I pictured the short boy dancing like a maniac.

"What's so funny?" He said over the noise of the new song playing on the radio. I shook my head as played air guitar as Highway To Hell by ACDC came on. I started singing along with the vocals and head banged along with it. Kai started to let loose and laughed as he played air guitar along with me. He was bad but in a funny way.

"I'm on the HIGHWAY TO HELL!" We screamed with the song. Kai was laughing so hard tears were streaming down his face and I was bent over holding my side from laughing so hard.

"Glad…haha….that you've….haha….finally relaxed…hahaha!" I chocked out. Kai grinned. "Yea, well, it is hard not to when you are acting like you're having a seizure!" He laughed and fell back on his bed.

"You saying I dance bad?" I grinned evily and jumped on the bed, putting Kai in a headlock. "ACK!" He grunted half in shock and half because I was sorta chocking him. "SAY UNCLE!" I laughed as he struggled to get free and get me back.

"How about I say "HA"!" He threw his legs forword towards his head and wrapped his ankles behind my head and flipped me. I went flying, releasing him form the chock-hold.

"HEY YOU TWO! LUNCH TIME!" Sango banged on the door and Miroku yelled through as well, "Hey! What are you two guys doing in there? Never mind! I don't wanna know!" He burst out laughing and Kai and I scrambled for the door. I opened it and glared down at the monk. "hehe…kidding?" Miroku wimpered. I burst out laughing. "I'm giving you a three second head start!" With that I ran after the screaming and panicing monk.

Kai walked to the lunch room with Sango and we all ate lunch together outside on a bright Saturday afternoon.

AHAHAHA! 1st chappie DONE! Well tell me what you think! Go on…push the little purple button….you know you wanna….