Author Note – Thanks for all of the reviews, I'm happy you liked it. There may be a third chapter, if you have a few moments I would love to read any comments you have.

Doubt – chapter two

Her fingers felt numb to the scalding water that was washing over them as she scrubbed them clean. She had no idea how long she had been standing there, rinsing the girl's blood from her hands. It was becoming a bit of a habit, washing blood from her hands. No matter what she did, Emily could still feel it running over her fingers. Every time she shut her eyes, she was back in that courtyard. Kneeling over the girl who had been so desperate to end her life she begged a serial killer to do what she couldn't bring herself to. All Emily had thought of all evening was the tearful expression on Anna's face as she plunged the knife into her own stomach.

Emily leant down and gently splashed some water on her face. Bringing up her head, Emily let out a breath as she gazed into the mirror. Anna was so young and couldn't see a way out. Emily recalled a time when she had felt just as desperate, but a good friend had stood by her, helped her out of a situation which signalled the demise of his own faith. For the first time in years, Emily wished Matthew was there to talk to. But his own problems wouldn't have made him the most appropriate confident of a federal agent.

A knock at the bathroom door jerked her from her thoughts of the past. Glancing around, she made her way to the door, pulling it open to reveal Morgan standing there. He had changed clothes; the blood had soaked both of them. Looking down at her clothes, Emily huddled self-consciously next to the door trying to hide the stains on her shirt. She could only imagine what her suit jacket was like.

Morgan cleared his throat and held up the bag he had in his hand, her bag. "Um, I thought you might want to change. Our bags were still in the car, so I grabbed yours too."

Emily looked relieved as she reached out for her holdall. "Thank you," she gave him a tiny smile.

They stood awkwardly for a moment as Morgan's gaze drifted over her face, contemplating for a moment before he spoke again. "How's your head?" He asked quietly, concern dripping from his voice.

Emily's head tilted, resting against the door. "Okay," with all the adrenaline of pursuing Tubs she had ignored the pounding of her head and the pressure Straus was putting her under.

"I'm sorry I called you out in the conference room in front of Reid and JJ," he told her. "But my offer still stands if you ever want to talk, I'm hear."

For a moment she thought about telling him about everything, but didn't want to drag him into the middle of it and risk his career. "It's okay," Emily eventually said and watched as his eyebrow quirked. "I'm just finding it hard to deal with this sometimes. If I'm going to stay, I need to come to terms with it on my own."

His brow creased slightly at her choice of words but he nodded anyway as he let it the comment about staying drop. "Okay, I'll let you get changed. Hotch is handling the hand over to the locals, he needs to be back in DC for a meeting with Strauss." Emily's eyes widened slightly.

She hid her need to know what the meeting was about, but she doubted Morgan would know anyway. There was no doubt he would question why she wanted to know if she did ask. Emily tried to act nonchalant as she spoke, "Oh okay, I'll be there soon to help."

She tried to ignore her curiosity as she quickly changed into some of the spare clothes in her bag. Strauss hadn't called her, but she had obviously found out about the incident with Tubs and Anna. Emily dreaded what would happen next.

The following afternoon, Hotch gathered the team in the conference room to make them aware of his suspension. His sombre tone sounded like he had resigned himself to leaving. He made eye contact with every member of the team, his penetrating gaze barely landing on Emily before he left the room. Gideon trailed behind him, and seconds later everyone jumped as the slamming of the older man's door made the glass shudder.

That evening Emily was scrubbing herself clean once again in the shower, the hot water burning as she continued to rinse her hands, only this time the blood was imaginary. Hotch's. The BAU needed Hotch more than it needed her. Maybe if she had spoken to him about Strauss's request things may have gone differently, maybe both of them could have stayed. But she knew that wouldn't have changed the outcome of the case, the best chance of catching Tubs was to let him go and wait for the copycat killer to approach him.

Eventually the water started to run cold, and Emily shut it off. Drying quickly and changing into her pyjamas, Emily settled at her desk and turned her laptop on. There was no way she could continue in a job where she was expected to spy on her co-workers. She hated politics. Opening a blank document, Emily began to type her letter of resignation as she thought of the many times she had said good bye in the past. This would be by far the hardest farewell she would ever have to make. Maybe she would be able to slip away without anyone noticing.