I'll go back and edit this eventually. But, in the meantime, here's another chapter.


"Dudley, Dudders, Dee Dee—"

"Go away. I told you I don't have it."

"—Darling, Big D, Didley, Dookums—"

"Now you're just being ridiculous, Harry," commented Dudley without looking away from the TV screen as the character he was playing jumped over a monster, but Harry didn't stop.

"—Snookums, Doodee, Poopee Face—"

"What's the point of whatever you're trying to do?" Dudley's fingers started moving furiously on the controller. "C'mon, c'mon—dang it!" He threw down his controller in defeat. "I was so close..." he muttered angrily. With a sigh, he then turned to his next source of entertainment: Harry, his annoying cousin.

"—Snickers, Manly Woman, Feminine Guy, Ugly Dougly, Big Guy – Dudley, could you just tell me where my game is? I'm running out of names here, in case you hadn't noticed," said Harry in exasperation. He didn't want to throw in too many fat comments since he knew his cousin was still sensitive when it came to his weight. Even though he had lost a lot over the last few years, he was still a rather large boy, about 5 sizes larger than Harry. It was in his genes, Harry knew. From what he could remember of his uncle, he had been more of a whale than a man.

"Oh, I noticed," Dudley smirked.

Harry glared. "Dudley..."

Dudley glared back, a nasty smirk still on his face. "I. Don't. Have. It."

Harry dropped his glare and sighed loudly in feigned disappointment. "I didn't want to have to do this, but you've left me no choice... AUNT PETUNIA!"

Dudley's eyes widened fearfully and Harry smiled. Good. He would be getting answers now.

"Ha—rry," he whined. "Why'd you have to drag mum into this?"

"It's not my fault you won't tell me where my game is."

"And it's not my fault you never believe me."

"That's only because you're always lying."

"...that might be true, but I'm telling the truth this time, I swear!"

Aunt Petunia poked her head in the living room where the two boys were arguing. "What happened?"

Harry pointed his finger at Dudley. "He took my computer game!"

"Did not!"

Aunt Petunia shook her head and rubbed a hand over her face tiredly. "Why don't the two of you go outside, get some Vitamin D, maybe some exercise...?" Harry knew that she, too, was hesitant to bring up her son's weight.

The two boys looked at each other in horror and then back at Petunia like she was crazy.

"It's, like, a hundred degrees outside!" Dudley finally exclaimed. It wasn't, of course, but it was rather humid.

"So?" she snapped. "That never stopped Lily and me."

"Well, you and mum were insane," Harry explained as if it were obvious, but upon seeing the look on her face, he knew it had been the wrong thing to say. "No offense!" He hastily added, but it was too late. The damage was done.

Aunt Petunia's lips thinned. "That's it. Out, both of you."

"What?"

"Aunt Petunia—"

"You can't do this!"

"I don't want to hear it. If Lily and I could do it, then you two can, too. Now - out!" She ushered them out of the living room and then out of the house, ignoring their protests as they went. The door slammed shut behind them, and Harry swore he heard her both lock the door and drag a chair from the kitchen to lodge under the doorknob.

"This is all your fault," Dudley grumbled five minutes later as the two boys mindlessly walked around their neighborhood under the blazing sun.

"My fault? You're the one who wouldn't tell—"

"Oh, would you stop going on about your stupid game. It's in your room."

"Really?" asked Harry in disbelief.

"Yeah, and I could be in my room playing on my computer right now if it weren't for you."

Suddenly, Harry stopped walking. "What'd you do to it?" He asked suspiciously.

"What?" Dudley, who had stopped walking as well, turned to look at Harry questioningly.

"To my game. What'd you do to it?" Harry repeated.

"Oh, that..."

"Yes, that." Harry took a threatening step forward. "Dudley..."

Dudley fidgeted with the hem of his shirt. "...I might've maybe sat on it. Maybe." Dudley looked down sheepishly, avoiding eye contact.

Harry's mouth dropped open in horror. "Dudley!"

"What? It was an accident, I swear!" He turned away and started crossing the street. "At least I'm telling you about it now," Harry heard him mutter bitterly.

"Yeah, a bit too late though," said Harry loudly, as he jogged to catch up with him and began walking by his side. "If you had just told me in the first place we wouldn't be out here getting sunburns." Harry held out his arm. "Look at this; I'm as red as a tomato." Dudley didn't look, but Harry didn't mind because he wasn't actually red.

"Whatever." Dudley kicked at a rock. "What are we going to do now?"

Harry dropped his arm and stared at his cousin for several seconds. He wanted to tell Dudley that he owed him a new game because Harry had bought the broken one with his own money, but he let it go and sighed noisily. "I don't know. Walk," Harry suggested with a half-shrug.

They did just that.

Together, they headed towards the neighborhood park in an unspoken agreement. Harry could tell something was bothering Dudley, and he had a feeling it had to do with his game. It couldn't be the game itself, he knew that for a fact, because Dudley had broken plenty of his games over the years and never so much as blinked an eye. It had to be something else.

He observed his cousin from his peripheral view. The boy was glaring down at his trainers with his fists clenched tightly by his sides. Obviously Harry would have to act quickly.

Harry pushed Dudley gently. The other boy's head jerked up, his glare now directed at Harry. Smiling cheekily, Harry pushed him again, harder this time, and his cousin stumbled to the left.

"Hey!" exclaimed Dudley, catching his footing. His arm shot out towards Harry, but the other boy was too quick and darted out of the way. "I'm gonna get you for that, Harry."

Laughing, Harry poked Dudley in the stomach, and then immediately jumped backward to avoid another fist. Dudley's knuckles grazed him that time.

Dudley's blue eyes narrowed in determination.

"Catch me if you can!" called Harry as he took off running towards the park, Dudley hot on his heels. Fighting, Harry knew, always cheered his cousin up. When they got home, Harry would tell his aunt that she should put Dudley in a karate or wrestling class.

Ten minutes later, the two boys were out of breath and exhausted.

"I think..." panted Harry as he dropped to the grassy floor beneath a tree face-first, groaned, and then rolled on his back, "I think I just died a little... "

Dudley plopped down next to him, sweat dripping down his face. "I'm right there with you," he said miserably.

Harry threw his arm over his face and groaned again. "Make that a lot. I died a lot."

"Excellent," said a familiar voice. "Then that means I won this year's Detention Game."

Harry shot up quickly, before moaning loudly as his vision grew fuzzy and his head spun. "Too fast, too fast," he said as he held out a hand to steady himself. When his vision cleared, he saw Austin grinning back at him.

"Hey, Hair," said the shorter blonde boy. He then nodded towards Dudley. "Hey, Dud."

Dudley moaned loudly in greeting.

The two friends caught each other up on the past few days since summer vacation had started. Austin had been at his uncle's house since day one, cleaning the man's house and taking care of his three dogs while he was on vacation in the States. Harry, however, had been lazing about at home with Dudley, doing the occasional chore here and there.

"What are you doing here anyway?" asked Harry. Dudley was dozing off under the tree several feet away from them. Or maybe he was dying, Harry wasn't completely sure.

Dudley had never had any interest in taking part in Harry and Austin's "shenanigans," as Aunt Petunia liked to call them. And although Harry liked his cousin well enough, he had to admit that he never wanted him to participate in their "Detention Game" either. It wasn't that Dudley was stupid... He just had trouble being creative. Harry didn't blame him for that though. Dudley had once told him that his memory of his dad was fuzzy, but he would always remember the man's dislike of imagination and creativity. Harry understood what Dudley wasn't saying; He wanted to make his dead parent proud, and being in Harry's little "gang" was going against what he knew his dad would have wanted.

Harry could definitely relate. After his aunt had told him about how kind, hardworking, and determined his mother had been, he yearned to be just that to make her happy. That resulted in him being bumped up a grade when he was six, which then led him to meet his current best friend. And when his aunt told him that his dad had been very mischievous, the "Detention Game" was formed with said best friend.

"I'm here with my dad and little brother," Austin answered. "We stopped at your house first to see if I could hang out there, but your Aunt said she kicked you two out for the day. She looked pretty paranoid. Did you know she had a chair up against the door?"

"I knew it!"

The two laughed and joked before getting down to business.

"The teachers are already on to us," said Harry, running a hand through his already messy hair.

"We've only been going there for a year, too." Austin sighed sadly, pulling a few blades of grass out of the ground. "What d'you reckon they'll do?"

"I don't know... Stop giving us detentions, probably."

"Yeah," agreed Austin. "And then Moe would die of boredom because we wouldn't be gettin' detentions all the time, and with Moe dead, the school wouldn't be able to function properly, and with the school goin' all crazy, the principal would have no choice but to shut it down, and if they shut it down, then... then..."

"Then the world would explode?" suggested Harry.

"Exactly!" exclaimed Austin. "And we can't let that happen."

"Why not?"

Ignoring him, Austin said, "How 'bout we change the rules a bit?"

"I was actually thinking the same thing."

And so, the two boys discussed their game while Dudley slept on a particularly comfortable patch of grass.


Petunia sat at the kitchen table with a thick envelope in her trembling hands. She knew this day would come, but it had crept up on her so fast. Had it really been ten years since her sister died?

She stared blankly at the wall in front of her. Harry would be so upset with her, she knew, for not telling him about his... magical abilities sooner. Sure, like Lily, he had his share of accidental magic, as her sister had once called it, but it hadn't happened lately. When he was younger, he had made toys float to him as a baby, turned his teacher's hair blue after receiving a C on a test, and had even blown up Dudley's telly once. He had come crying to her when the last two events happened, and she had given him logical explanations for each occurrence. Yes, she felt guilty for lying to him, but she hadn't been ready to tell him the truth.

Maybe she had been selfish.

Her finger traced over the neatly written address on the envelope. As a little girl, she had once dreamed of receiving this exact letter - she had even written a polite letter to the headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, begging him to let her go to Hogwarts, too, but he had let her down gently, explaining to her that she wasn't a witch and therefore could not go. She had been crushed.

"Hey, Aunt Petunia," said Harry as he casually walked into the room.

"Oh!" Petunia bolted from her seat, the chair crashing to the floor behind her, and held her hand up to her chest. "Harry, dear, I wasn't expecting you."

"I noticed," he snickered. "What's that?" he asked, pointing to the envelope she had thoughtlessly brought up to her chest in her shock.

She looked down at the letter nervously. "Never you mind that," she said, casually hiding it behind her back. Harry looked at her curiously. "How did you get in?"

Harry grinned smugly. "Magic," he answered simply.

Truth was, Aunt Petunia had left several windows open for some airflow, and both he and Dudley were able to crawl through one. Dudley was now up in his room playing on his computer like he had wanted. Harry, being the good nephew that he was, had stopped by the kitchen to let his aunt know they were home.

But he wasn't expecting his aunt to turn white and lean heavily against the counter at the sight of him. Harry stared at his aunt in concern; She looked like she was about ready to pass out.

"Aunt Petunia?" he said uncertainly. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, yes," she answered reassuringly, pushing away from the counter and collapsing into a chair beside the one that had fallen. "I'm perfectly fine." She nodded, as if trying to convince herself.

Harry contemplated whether he should stay or leave while he still could. His aunt was acting strange.

"I think you should sit, dear," suggested Aunt Petunia shakily. "There is something I need to tell you."

Now Harry was sure he should have run when he was given the chance. Aunt Petunia looked serious, and serious was never good.

He sat on the edge of the chair across from her obediently and waited for her to talk. She took her sweet time gathering her thoughts. Just as Harry opened his mouth to ask her if he was in trouble, she dropped the envelope he had noticed earlier on the table and slid it across to him, her gaze glued to it.

Harry glanced down at it in confusion.

It was addressed to "Mr. H. Potter" in emerald-green ink.

He cocked his head to the side as he brought it up for closer inspection. He had never received a letter in the mail before; Usually, letters from his school were addressed to his guardian, Aunt Petunia. But this one was strange.

"There's no return address," Harry stated, flipping it over. "And there's a wax seal, look." He moved to show his aunt the fancy purple seal, but she shook her head.

"I've seen it."

"But-"

"Open it, Harry." He had never seen his aunt look more frightened of a letter before in his life.

Holding it a safe distance away from him in case something decided to jump out at him (it had happened before), Harry tore open the envelope, letting a thick parchment fall out. Once he was sure the letter wouldn't explode in his face unexpectedly, he unfolded it hastily and read:

HOGWARTS SCHOOL
of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY

Headmaster: ALBUS DUMBLEDORE
(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock,
Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)

Dear Mr. Potter,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.
Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.
Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall,
Deputy Headmistress


Yep. So he got his letter, meaning Austin and Dudley won't be in the story for much longer (sads). And I'm sorry this chapter is so rushed. One day, I'll go back and fix up everything.

Please review and tell me what you think so far, or you could even tell me what you think should happen next. Who do you think Harry should be friends with at Hogwarts? Which house do you think he should be in? ...seriously, I need your help.