Disclaimer: don't own anything!
AN: my first attempt at crackfic
Four years later, still in Gongaga...
"I'M GONNA BE A SOLDIER." announced the olive skinned, half crazed boy.
He was brandishing a makeshift sword with the most charming smile that could unmelt his dear old mum...but alas even this cannot change the fact that he liked setting things on fire, especially hair. Everyone learned earlier on to NEVER ever let Zackary Fair near a flint, fuse, candle, bunsen, gas lamp, matches, a can of aerosol, alcohol, lighter and gasoline.
The lovely Mrs. Fair had not gone thru a five hour delivery just so her child could have a valid reason to cause more destruction. On second thought it would be a great punishment if she unleashed her son to the Planet. Sometimes she blamed her husband for unconsciously encouraging the boy. She willed her headache away and said, "We've been through this before Zax, no means NO."
"But I have to be!" he whined.
"And what would you do?" her mother challenged, "Get yourself killed? And ShinRa no less! I'd rather you run a chocobo farm-"
"Bad idea honey!" her husband cut in.
"Chocobo farm huh?" a slight manic flashed on the boy's purple eyes, "I think I like that-"
Mrs. Fair as about to make her approval when she gaped at the very idea of her son terrorizing a bunch of chocobos and gambling. She was begging for an eight course Chocobo meal. No, no, no, no! Bad idea. A very VERY bad idea.
"Nevermind that dear!" the woman amended quickly, "You can pursue any career Zax,"
The boy was just about to explode but his face fell when his mother added:
"Except be a SOLDIER."
"Not fair!"
"Last time I check you are. Honey, did you-?" her hubby was caught off by an icy glare.
"Sleep in the couch tonight."
"But Mum," Zax pleaded, "I want to be a hero!"
The woman hugged her son tightly, "But sweetie you are a hero! My hero! You're Dad is the villain."
"Mum! What the heck? I'm being serious here!"
Both the elder Fairs could not help but find their son's tantrum entertaining and cute.
"Alright, alright." she said placating her overzealous boy, "I just don't want you to be in Midgar or in the barracks where anything can happen. I don't want to wake up one day to the news of my brave son dead! Do you understand? If I have to tie you up for the remainder of your youth I would."
"And that is why I love your mother Zax." the Fair patriarch said.
The boy nodded sheepishly and ignored his father. He did not mean to upset his mum. He just wants to follow his dreams. And get a girlfriend.
"You don't have to be a SOLDIER to become a hero Zaxary." his mother tried to persuade again, "You could be a businessman or a doctor or a...a, um, mercenary?"
"Of course not honey! Our Zaxy here got past middle school in one piece. What difference doe it make if he's in the military?"
"Everything!"
While the couple argued Zax was contemplating. Well, my SOLDIER dream is a bust till I make sure mum isn't serious about the whole overprotective thing.
"Oh! Oh wait! I have a new dream!"
Mr. Fair glanced at his wife, "What is it then son?"
Zax's smile broadened it looked frighteninng instead of enlightening.
"I want to be a FIREMAN."
"Can you repeat that dear?"
"A fireman, mum."
"A what?"
Sigh.
"F-Y-R-E-M-A-N."
"Did I hear that right?"
"A fireman. As in FIRE."
"Yes, I believe so honey.."
Zax beamed at his parents. Finally, something he was really, really looking forward to. Being a fire fighter would be so cool and he would get to save people too! However, his mother who knew little Zacky would end up with a more likely scenerio of being mesmerized by the large amount fire.
He'll most likely be the cause of it too. Shiva save us all if he chose that road...
The silence stretched to what seemed like eternity letting the words sink in. The Fair household just sat there. One stunned head of the house, one seething matriarch and one oblivious smiling child.
"I blame you." Mrs Fair snapped at her husband.
With a sigh Mr. Fair said, Zax, I strongly object to your second dream however I'll remain neutral about your first dream. Good luck my son."
AN: In the game it was actually Zax. But it'll be Zack later on.
-midnightgamin
