Thank you guys for your reviews last chapter, I'm glad you're enjoying this. Couple things before you read - there is no mystery in this story. It's gonna focus more on mental health and how they all balance that and school. Trust me, Eddie's not the only one dealing with mental illness. Second - I ship Fabina, Peddie, Amfie, Jara, and Moy. The only couple not together right now is Peddie, for obvious reasons. Mick and Joy's relationship will be explained (how they started talking, how they got together, etc), and I'm changing some things from the show for the other couples, so you'll see that too. Just a warning.

Trigger warning - anxiety, depression, self-harm, and suicide.


Any hopes he had about having a relaxing day before school starts tomorrow have officially been shattered.

He's been worried about the other kids coming back since Fabian left, and now, now that Trudy's warned him they're going to be arriving in the next five minutes, he's terrified. He doesn't know what to expect or how to react. He hasn't met this many people in a long time, and he'd be lying if he wasn't freaking out.

The shitty thing about anxiety is the hyper observance. He notices everything, from a change in tone to a shift in posture, and it's terrifying. He could be having a good conversation with someone and there'd be a shift in their tone and then he'd be left wondering what the hell he did wrong. It's irrational – anxiety is just that, but he doesn't know how to live without it. He doesn't know how people don't do it.

It's not that he's a complete invalid, but when it comes to meeting new people and being in a foreign place and having to adjust to all that, his anxiety kicks into high gear. He's usually not this on-edge, but the circumstances of the situation are making it hard not to be.

"Alfie!" A high-pitched shriek echoes through the room as the front door swings open and wave of kids bursts through.

The sound of thudding footsteps follows, and Eddie cranes his neck, watching as the girls run upstairs. They're probably going to put their stuff away, while he's waiting his impending doom.

"Who are you?"

He blinks, zoning back into reality and feeling his heart immediately start to speed up in his chest. A cold sweat is washing over him, making him feel like he's just been dunked naked in a frigid pool. He's trying to keep himself from shaking but that isn't working out so well.

"This is Eddie." A familiar voice enters the conversation and Eddie sighs in relief, glancing toward Fabian. Two other boys are standing next to him, looking at Eddie in confusion.

"Oh, the new kid?"

Fabian nods. "He just arrived today."

The taller one turns to Eddie and holds out a hand. "I'm Jerome, and this is Alfie."

Eddie can feel himself trembling as he meets both of their eyes. "Hi."

"He's American? Looks like Nina's got a friend." Alfie shoots Fabian a smirk. "Maybe they know each other."

"Shut up Alfie," Fabian retorts, rolling his eyes. "If you're trying to get me angry, it's not working."

"Going for a run!" Eddie's eyes travel over to a blond standing in the hallway, bent over to tie his shoes.

"Is Joy going with you?"

"Yep!" Eddie watches, as a brown-haired girl comes bounding down the stairs dressed in a tank top and some workout capris. She leans in to kiss the blond's cheek, and he wraps an arm around her waist. "Back in an hour Trudy, bye!" They leave the building quickly, already starting a conversation.

"Who?" He asks, looking from Fabian to Jerome and Alfie for help.

"Mick and Joy," Alfie explains. "Their idea of a date is a jog around campus. It's disgusting."

"Your idea of a date is going to an arcade and Amber hates that."

"But at least that's a normal date spot!"

"Since when do you get to decide what's normal and what's not?"

Alfie and Jerome's arguing is interrupted by the remaining four girls walking into the room. They've all changed out of their uniforms and gotten rid of their bags, looking a lot more relaxed than they did before.

"Hey, come here." Fabian pulls on the wrist of a dirty blonde, bringing her to his side. "Eddie, this is my girlfriend, Nina."

"It's really nice to meet you," Nina says. "Trudy told us a lot of good things."

He freezes.

Her voice is different.

She has an American accent, just like he does. She's American, just like him. He's not the only foreigner here. He's not the only one who's confused with the different culture and the different way of life and everything. He's not alone.

"You…you're American?" Relief is filling his entire body. He feels like he can breathe again. He's not alone. There's someone here who knows what it's like to be in his position. He's going to be okay.

He's going to be okay.

"Oh wow, he's found someone of his kind."

The sneer comes from a girl with dyed red hair. Eddie recognizes her as one of the girls who wouldn't help him earlier, who steered him in the wrong direction and laughed when he ended up back when he ended up right back where he started.

"Watch it, Patricia," Fabian mutters, glaring at her. "He hasn't done anything to you."

"What, the little baby can't stick up for himself?"

"Do you do this with every new kid you meet?"

"Only the ones that seem like wusses."

Eddie shrugs. "Whatever. Didn't wanna be friends with a bitch like you anyway."

He hears her mumble something equally snarky back, but pays no mind to it as he rises to his feet and makes his way out of the common room.


"Don't listen to her. She's like this with all new people."

"Why are you making excuses for her?" Eddie mutters, tilting his head back against his pillows and closing his eyes. "She sounds like a real bitch."

Nina sighs. "She's like this with all new people, especially people like us, that aren't from around here."

"How long have you been here?"

She smiles. "This is my second year. I was just like you, last year. Scared and uncomfortable in a new place because I didn't know anyone. Just hang in there. Patricia will warm up to you."

"I'm not so sure I want her to."

"She's not that bad, once you get to know her." A shadow flickers across Nina's face. "She's been through a lot. Being bitchy is her way of protecting herself."

"Don't give me that crap about how she's a kicked puppy that's been hurt in the past and now acts like a brat to protect herself," Eddie grumbles. "I've been through my own shit. Doesn't mean I'm a dick to people."

"You're absolutely right," Nina says. "But if you just give her a chance, she might surprise you."


When Nina leaves, Fabian takes her place, sitting on the edge of Eddie's bed and looking at him in concern. The look in Fabian's eyes has Eddie suspicious. He knows something. Something that he probably shouldn't.

"Are you okay?" Fabian asks. "Patricia isn't the easiest person to get along with."

"My dad told you everything, didn't he?" Eddie mutters. "That's why you're looking at me like I'm about to fall apart in front of you."

Fabian isn't a very good liar. Eddie knows it as soon as he tries to stutter out some half-assed story about how he was just worried. "You're not a good liar, Fabian. I know he did."

Fabian shoots him a sheepish grin. "He didn't tell me anything, but he told me quite a bit."

"Of course," Eddie replies bitterly. "Because I'm a fragile, crazy, fuck up that comes with warnings signs. Make sure you know what you're signing up for if you wanna be friends with me."

"Eddie-"

"Did he tell you to check my wrists daily too? Because he's so damn afraid I'll freak out and slit them open? That's why I ended up here to begin with."

"Stop," Fabian says firmly. "Your dad just wants me to keep an eye on you. He just wanted me to know what was going on so I wouldn't be confused if you had a panic attack or something. He didn't say anything about checking your wrists or suicide watch, but if it comes down to that, I'll do it. I am worried about you. But that's only because I care."

"You don't even know me."

"I know you like rock music, you wear a lot of black, you don't care what people think about it, and you aren't afraid to stand up for what you believe in," Fabian replies. "And that's all from less than 12 hours."

"Don't tell anyone, okay?" Eddie lifts his head and looks over at Fabian, meeting his eyes. "About how messed up I am. I don't want them to treat me like glass."

"I won't," Fabian promises. "But your past isn't who you are right now. You're so much more than that."

Eddie sighs, shaking his head. "I think I have to get over what happened to feel the same way."


Thoughts? The more reviews I get, the faster you guys will get the next chapter. And in that chapter, Patricia and Eddie get into a bit of a...disagreement, over breakfast, and the stress of everything finally gets to Eddie. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed.