Authors Note: Thanks for the reviews and favorites! I think I will give this story a go and see how it turns out. One thing I forgot to mention is that, in my story, WB does not exist and Bud is Hydes' real father. Also, Jackie and Fes never dated but will be roommates. Everything else should be on par for the series, though. Jackie will appear in the next chapter- I promise! Enjoy and let me know what you think!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything That 70's Show related.

Pick up your swords and fly

The wall woke him.

Actually, his face crashing into it woke him. Since when had his cot been so small?

He mumbled some cuss words in his half awake state and turned onto his back. Assessing his nose, he stared at the ceiling above. The cobwebs now covered the ceiling boards and were beginning to expand down the wall. They'd been growing, untouched, for about a year now.

Since the last time he'd cleaned his room for Jackie.

He didn't see the point of touching them. Sam hadn't cared about his cleanliness and after she left there was no one left for them to bother.

No one left to bother about him, either.

He heard Fes laughing in the basement. The sounds of an angry Skipper followed.

Foreman and Donna were probably setting up their apartment in Madison about now. Kelso was busting criminals, raising a kid, and being stupid per usual. Fes would soon be leaving for Chicago where he would be joining Jackie- as her roommate.

Soon, he'd be gone too.

With a sigh, he pushed himself up in bed. Now sitting on the edge, he discovered the true impact of his hangover. His head felt like it'd been hit with a sledgehammer and his stomach somersaulted. A glance around his room told the tale of the nights' transgressions.

Zeppelin albums lay haphazardly around his record player. Zeppelin III sat idly on the player itself. His ashtray overflowed with cigarettes both legal and not so much. On top of his nightstand stood a bottle of whiskey.

Empty. Well, that explains the headache.

He eyed the packet of paperwork next to the bottle. Squinting his eyes back into focus, he fingered the pages and counted.

Six pages constituted the rest of his life. Figures.

Bringing the pages towards him, he read aloud.

"I, Steven J. Hyde, solemnly swear to abide by and defend the constitution of the United States of America as my sworn duty to the United States Armed Forces."

He really had given into the man. If his body didn't already ache he would frog himself.

Resigned, he hid the paperwork in his nightstand and righted the downed candle on its' surface.

It still smelled a little like strawberries.

He pulled his now alcohol scented t-shirt over his head and threw it in the laundry pile. He replaced it with another Zeppelin shirt. Pulling on some jeans, he moved to join his only remaining friend in the other room.

"Hey Hyde." Fes chirped. He was sitting on the couch and tossing M&M's into his mouth. "Ow, my eye!" He cried when one of them missed his mouth.

"Morning Fes." He took his assigned seat in his chair.

Fes laughed. "Morning? It is five pm. Burn!" He shouted it with such pride that Hyde couldn't disappoint the poor kid.

He nodded subtly. "Good one, man."

He'd miss that little foreigner.

Gilligan did some other stupid thing and Fes laughed.

"So Fes, when are you heading out to Chicago?"

Fes spoke through the M&Ms in his mouth. "I am leaving this weekend. Jackie say's that I can bring all of the dirty sluts home that I want as long as I keep them in my room." He looked off, seemingly in a daze. "It will be my own slut island."

Hyde shifted in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. "Sounds like heaven, man." He paused. "But hey, if Jackie brings any guys home make sure you bother them as much as possible." He grinned lightly. "She likes that."

Fes pondered. "Oh, I get it! So if I bother Jackie and her manwhores than they will want to include me in their fun." Fes ran over to him and through his arms around Hydes' neck. "Oh, thank you sex guru!"

He didn't hug back. That wouldn't be very zen of him.

Fes moved back to the couch and picked up his M&Ms. "So what is next for you, Hyde? More strippers? Because if there are going to be more strippers than Fes would like to be included."

Hyde considered the question. Fes would find out eventually- they all would. By then he planned on being as far away from Point Place as possible. He wasn't one for goodbyes-never had been.

"I got a plan." He starred at the TV just as Ginger came out in her sequined gown. She was sexy, but he'd always been more partial to Mary Ann.

"Does this plan involve whores? Or possibly candy?" Fes crossed his fingers.

Hyde sighed. "Tell you what Fes, if it does than you will be the first person I call."

Fes grinned from ear to ear. "I knew it, Hyde. I am your bestest friend."

Hyde sighed just as heavy footsteps echoed from the staircase.

"Hey, foreign kid!" Reds' voice poured down. Fes sat up straight and responded in affirmation. Red appeared at the bottom of the steps and gave Fes the death glare. "Now you're getting phone calls here? Don't you have a phone at home?"

Fes stood and trotted towards Red. "Yes, but your cord is longer. My host parents do not permit private calls since I dialed that 900 number." He raced up the stairs. Red stayed in place.

"Steven? We need to talk." Hyde gulped. He turned in his chair to face Red.

"I know what you're gonna say, Red."

"Oh, do you? Stumbling in drunk in the middle of the day? I thought that Kitty and I made it clear. If you are going to stay in his house you need to get a decent job and clean up your act."

Hyde felt the blood rush from his face. He hated disappointed Red. "Sorry, Red. Won't happen again." He paused and watched the expression on the older mans' face soften. "Look I, uh, got a plan. I'll be out of your hair in no time."

"Is that some smartass bald joke?" Red demanded, though his humor shone through.

Hyde laughed. "Nah, man." Red stood, expectantly. Well, maybe he could just tell one person. "I enlisted."

Red's anger immediately diminished to an expression of pride.

"Well, I'm proud of you son." Red moved forward and held his hand out. Hyde stood, his legs shaking, and accepted the handshake.

"Thanks, Red." He paused. "Listen, uh, can we just keep this between us for now?"

Red nodded, a rare smile appearing. "Of course, Steven. You think I want to deal with Kittys' emotions just yet?" Red sighed. "At least we raised one right, huh?" He patted Hydes' shoulder causing an uncomfortable warmth to emerge in Hydes' chest.

At least he could make somebody proud of him.

Just then, Fes came running down the stairs.

"That was Jackie. She says that she is going to come pick me up this weekend. Ai, I cannot wait to move to slut island!"

Hyde tensed. His heart raced and his stomach danced with some sort of flutter.

It was the hangover-he told himself. That's all it was.