Author' Note: It won't be long 'til chapter 3 will be finished so I hope my readers will be patient for my slow updates.

Also if it won't be a bother, I'd like my readers to go to my profile and go to the link I've put there. It's something for the site.

So, again, betaed by FiggThe3rd.

Pairings: Arthur/Merlin

Warnings: Not much. I guess, angst?... hahaha...

Well, enjoy reading this everyone. :)


Chapter 2: Too Much


Lesson 2: When he falls out of love, it doesn't mean you're giving less. It's because he's asking too much.


Mordred is crying again. I know he longs for his father's warmth…

I only shut my eyes to keep the tears at bay as I sing a soft lullaby to my little boy.

For now, it soothes him as his eyes… His father's blue, blue eyes droop slowly. I smile a little since I know he is trying to fight it off but eventually, with a soft yawn, he sleeps.

I cuddle him close to me; giving him warmth in the cold night. If only to let him know that one of us loves him still.

When I know my baby boy is in a deep sleep, I gently put him back to his cot.

And go back down to the kitchen where another problem is yet to be resolved.

It is only Mordred and I in the house today, mother left to do some errands… And this visitor takes me by surprise when he shows up on my mother's front porch.

Haggard and sleep deprived he looks. I have half the mind to violently shut the door in his face but Mordred is in my arms and gurgles for him… Of course, the bastard takes him in his arms immediately. With the look in his eyes, he wishes I am included in the hug but I refuse.

I have to stay firm with my decision… No matter, how nauseous it has made me lately.

"Merlin…" He says, with a voice weary and guilty. "I'm… I am so…"

I stop him right there. I don't want to hear his apologies.

"Have you signed the divorce papers yet? Or do we need the attorneys to settle the matter of possession for us?" I look away from his distraught expression and pour myself a cuppa.

"We don't have…"

I stop him right there. "There are times I wish we never met." I then turn around and see him hurting. Tears threaten to fall from his eyes.

"I thought I could stomach it." A tear fell. "I thought I could endure your in- in- fidelities..." I say the word in a stuttering whisper. "But I couldn't." I swallow another sob.

I look at him with my hollowed blue eyes, the shade a tad darker than Arthur's.

"I don't want Mordred to hate you, Arthur. You are a good man… A good father… Just… Just not a good husband." I laugh a bit. "But you did warn on that bit, didn't you?" I muster the most lighthearted smile I can manage for Arthur, sitting there, looking at me like he is going to drop dead any moment now.

In the middle of the kitchen table are the divorce papers I sent him the week prior… The week he slept with Guinevere… and had enough!

I take a deep breath then say, "Arthur…" I look at him with pleading eyes. "Please just sign the bloody papers. I'm not asking you any alimony or settlement for our ruined marriage. I'm allowing joint custody for Mordred…. Isn't this fair for you!" I shout at the solemn blonde, my unstable emotions wreaking havoc that cause me to shed more tears.

Arthur stands up and makes his way towards me.

He is hesitant in his stance in front of me and I can only mirror back the hurt and bitter expression that I see on his chiseled face.

"I…" He furrows his eyebrows and then takes a deep breath. "I don't want history to repeat itself from our parents' time."

Both of our parents divorced for reasons that were never revealed to us. If our parents cheated on each other, it was not evident. Nobody gave away who wronged who. All we ever knew while growing up was the bitterness strongly exhibited when both of our parents would come into contact of any form.

I touch his face. Time seems to have reached him as well. Or maybe it is stress from all this drama.

It has been so long since we met.

Since his first betrayal towards me.

He looks worse for wear, drained but in his eyes, I see his stubbornness of not letting our marriage fall into shambles.

But I am stubborn as well. I turn away from him and make my way towards the front door.

His show of dedication to salvage this is far too late in my opinion.

"Leave the papers. The next time we meet is when we're with our lawyers." I coldly say to him.

He doesn't move from his place on the kitchen counter.

It is silent then he softly says, "I don't want this divorce, Merlin."

I hold back my tears and rest my forehead against the door, "Neither did I, Arthur."

He has a sour look on his face then leaves.

I slowly close the door then lean against it as I hear the sound of Arthur's car roaring to life and then driving away from my mother's house.

I sit against the door when my legs can no longer support and another bout of tears comes to remind me of the tragedy that my life has become.

How Arthur no longer loves me and wants to save this marriage for the reason of not wanting to repeat the heart ache that our child will feel once this is done.


So was this worth the wait? ;)