"Damnation!" Hermione grumbled..."Some days it doesn't pay to get out of bed!" She was referring to the article that was on the front page of the Daily Prophet, the Quibbler, Wicked Witches Weekly, Wizardly Wizards, and every other magical British tabloid paper...front page and central. There was a new Marriage Act...but for once, witches weren't getting the worst of it...this time, it was the wizards that got it in the neck.
"Still, what will I do?" she thought, "Minerva and I are the only eligible witches holding the first class Order of Merlin. We have to choose first for everyone to see and ponder...we can't hide our choices in the crowd. Shite!"
A week earlier and she would have known that one of her choices would have been her then boyfriend, one Ronald Billius Weasley! BUT, that was before she caught him shagging that prize slag, Lavender Brown once two often! And when cornered, Lavender claimed that she was pregnant by Ronald. Ronald looked like he was caught in the headlights...she knew he was looking for a way out but no, this was the last time he cheated on her. Pasting a fake smile on her face, she congratulated the happy couple and floo'd home.
An hour later, Molly floo-called asking if she could come through to discuss the little "misunderstanding". By that time Hermione had it up to here with the Weasley's AND she had a good three firewhiskeys by then. She told Molly that this was just one in a long line of "misunderstandings" and as far as she was concerned, a pregnant Lavender was more than welcome to Ron...but she was done with him...end of story!
Harry was next...he floo'd in to explain how Ron was misunderstood and that he really didn't mean to sleep with Lavender. Hermione was at the cranky state by then..."Look, Harry, I know he is your best friend but I am sick and tired of him screwing every loose skirt around...including your secretary, by the way...and then when caught, he cites a "misunderstanding". The only misunderstanding here was me actually believing he wanted to be me alone and that he was capable of keeping it in his pants. Well my misunderstanding is over...and Ron, having made his bed, can sleep in it...I want nothing more to do with him!" Harry apologized for disturbing her...and then things were quiet for an hour or so, in which Hermione had even more fire whiskeys.
It was Ginny next and she asked Hermione to give Ron a second chance after all, he only cheated because she wasn't putting out! Hermione nearly had a stroke and she raged, "The only reason Ron wasn't getting any from me was that I wasn't going to give it up to a man who didn't value my virginity. Your brother was screwing every witch who was within a five kilometer radius...including half the Harpies and Harry's secretary. So, Ron doesn't get to plead the victim here! And now, I have a headache and am going to bed. Night, Ginny!" With that, Hermione closed and blocked the floo and changed her wards before she headed to her bed.
Ron continued to try to get Hermione to take him back until she threatened to get a restraining order to keep him away. Ron had allegedly knocked up Lavender and he could marry her for all she cared. And that was what had happened a week earlier.
Now, she had to think about what she was going to do. She was glad she wasn't going to be married to Ron...but who did she want to marry? She knew what she did want...a wizard who could keep it in his pants...who would only have sex with her and no one else...someone who could talk about more than Quidditch...one who could haul her out of herself when she was too serious...one who was very clever and understood her...someone she wouldn't be ashamed to be married to. It should be someone older, possibly more mature. That was a tall order...but one thing was certain, whoever she chose, it wouldn't be Ronald Weasley! That was one very lucky escape!
So who? She ran thru a list of everyone she went to Hogwarts with and no one came to mind. Draco? Not after seven years of his bullying her. The Weasley twins? They would be good for a laugh but not for much more. Ditto for Sirius Black and the Lestrange brothers. Adrian, Marcus, Theo, Blaise were certainly okay but they weren't strong enough for her. So who was?
Then Hermione remembered...there was someone from Hogwarts who might do. She had been the victim of bullying from both Gryffindors and Slytherins...they would snap her quills, pour ink over her homework, and smash her inkwells, as well as stealing her book bag and leaving it all over the place. That was...until Thorfinn Rowle stepped in. For no good reason she could remember, he made it abundantly clear to all concerned that Hermione was under his protection and that he would be most unhappy with anyone who bullied her. All of a sudden, she was left alone...no one took her things or destroyed them...instead, they avoided her, not willing to earn Rowle's wrath. His reputation was such that even after he had graduated from Hogwarts, no one ever bullied her again...perhaps because they were out of the habit or because they were afraid he would still come after them...she never would know.
Thorfinn Rowle...much brighter and more thoughtful than most realized...and although he was Quidditch-mad, he could converse on more than Quidditch. And although he was a bit of a man-slag, no one had ever alleged that he had cheated on anyone; mind you, she wasn't sure he ever did date anyone exclusively, so perhaps that didn't count. Could he make her laugh and take her out of herself? Yes, definitely. Could he be serious and understand the things that were important to her? Maybe? But then...did all the qualifications have to be present in just one wizard...after all, she was to have TWO wizards!
So...Thorfinn Rowle...and who would be the second wizard? Just one name came to mind and it surprised her...Antonin Dolohov. She wasn't stupid...she remembered that he had tried to kill her in her fifth year, but then, he had been in the service of a mad man...a fanatic. Would he still be like that now? She knew that he and Thorfinn were best mates so as co-husbands, they would work well together. She had to make a choice...and although it was likely to really piss off all her friends, she was decided. She could do a lot worse than being married to Thorfinn Rowle and Antonin Dolohov...so, they were her choice!
