Written by: Jord
A hot woman comes up to Delta and asks if her butt looks big in her new shorts. She is a little chunky. What do they say?
Marcus: If you wanna wear a polka-dot swimsuit over a pin-striped suit – be my guest. It's a free country.
Dom: I uh – think I see my sergeant over there – gotta do some post-war recon. Lemme get back to you on that some other time, okay? *stumbles over to Marcus* Yo, Sarge, wait up!
Cole: Babycakes, you're gonna look beautiful in anything you wear. And I mean anything. *winks*
Baird: Hell yes. Don't you ever take a look at yourself in the mirror? You could still stand to lose a couple, though. I mean, the war's over – sure – but that doesn't mean you gotta let obesity run rife, do ya? Think about arterial blockage, diabetes, gastrointestinal diseases. Hell, you don't even hafta think in terms of illness – think of the insurance costs! You think the COG's got enough resources to take care of corpulent cases? It's all about prevention, sweetheart, prevention. *shakes his head* Man...
Hoffman: *swallows* Hon, I've been through fire and brimstone. I've seen my men die; I've held them in my arms as they died. I've heard enough sounds of gunfire, mortars, and emergence holes to last me a hundred lifetimes. That shit; all those memories have given me instincts. And my instincts are honed and sharpened to perfection. So much so that all the red lights and warning bells are making a danged frenzy in my head right now. So you know what that means, now don't you? *woman shakes her head, no* That means that even if we're the last two people on this planet, there's no way in hell I'm gonna answer that question.
Carmine: Of course not! I mean, you'll probably look great in almost anything. I – I mean not almost anything, I meant anything. Yeah. I mean the shorts are small, but they're uh – not too small for you – I mean, they're small as in kid-sized. *pauses a moment before quickly speaking in a high-pitched voice* Not that you're a kid! You're a woman, who can fit into kids' shorts – hey Sarge! Sarge! Wait up! *runs after Marcus*
Tai: I think you already know the answer to that yourself. But you're second-guessing your own voice. Don't look to others for approval – some will give you respectful advice, while most will doubt your self-confidence. And that's never a good first impression to give off. Go with your gut. If you like yourself in those clothes, wear them. And then don't give a damn about what others think.
