LordAce: Here we go, another chapter of everyone's favorite badass club!

Nathan: LordAce? What happened to Blitz?

LordAce: This name in itself is more badass, plus it's the same as my youtube channel.

Nathan: I saw that channel, you don't have any videos up.

LordAce: I will...eventually...

Nathan: Let's just get on with it already...


We should probably fix this place up somehow

"Hey, everyone!" Nathan shouted happily, he was in a better mood than usual that day.

"I don't freaking believe it..." Jonathan muttered. Soma looked like he had seen a ghost, and even Alucard had a look of shock on his face.

"What is it? Something on my face or something?" Nathan asked. Charlotte was the only one able to form a decent sentence at the moment, so she spoke up.

"Nathan...you're actually on time..." She stuttered, trying not to fall from her seat. It was true, Nathan actually got there before the designated meeting time. In fact, some of the other members weren't even there yet. Leon and Trevor had yet to arrive, and Richter fell over the second he walked in the door, because he was that surprised that Nathan got there before he did.

"Is it really that crazy that I got here on time?" Nathan asked, scratching the back of his head.

"Are you kidding? It's the end of the world!" Richter shouted before trying to jump out of the window. Simon groaned before skillfully using the vampire killer to grab Richter's leg before he plunged from the building. Of course, this was AFTER he busted the stain glass window trying to commit panicked suicide.

"Unbelievable...my father is going to kill me..." Alucard groaned quietly. After the rest of the club members arrived and got over the initial shock of seeing Nathan on time, Simon began the meeting.

"Now that we are all settled in, let's begin today's meeting. Vice President?" Alucard nodded before standing up, but before he had a chance to say anything, someone knocked on the door. Everyone looked at each other with confused looks on their faces. Nathan, being closest to the door, stood up and let who ever was standing out there in. (In case you're wondering, they weren't worried about any threats or anything, with as many badass protagonists in one room at the same time you'd have to be a complete fool to try anything.) Anyway, standing in the doorway, was a simple mailman.

"(How the hell did he get in here?)" Simon muttered under his breath.

"I have mail for a Mr. Simon Belmont?" He said happily, seemingly unfazed by...well...anything. Simon snapped back into it before accepting the mail. The mailman held out his hand for a tip, so Simon shook his hand before turning to the mail. The mailman groaned and muttered something under his breath before leaving.

"It's from someone named 'Foretoldlegends..." Simon whispered before reading over the papers.

"So what is it, Pres?" Leon asked. Simon stared at it before his veins began popping out of the side of his head.

"Soma..." He said darkly.

"Could you come over here?" Soma shrugged before walking on over, almost tripping because Shanoa was inadvertently stepping on his jacket. After nearly falling on his ass he went on over to Simon's side.

"What's up?" He asked. Simon didn't respond, but instead he clocked Soma right across the face.

"OW! What the HELL?" Soma yelled, but before he could retaliate Simon threw the papers at him.

"WE'RE GETTING SUED BECAUSE OF YOU!" Simon shouted, which got everyone to jump up in shock.

"What do you mean, we're getting sued?" Maria yelled before glaring at Soma.

"Look at this!" Simon replied, holding up what seemed to be a flyer of some sort. It had a chibi Soma on it doing a Victory finger sign on it holding what seemed to be a disc with blades on it. Under the picture it read 'Soma's lawncare and removal services, we'll cut your s#it up good!' under the little slogan it read in fine print 'All proceeds go to the Castlevania Badass Protagonists Club, any and all complaints should be sent directly to the president, Simon Belmont.' And it even had the address where Castlevania was standing.

"I'll admit; that is a cute little picture." Charlotte giggled, looking like more of a schoolgirl than usual. Jonathan groaned, thinking he'd never hear the end of 'Why don't you make a picture like that?' or 'I'm gonna get everyone together and make chibi pictures of us!'

"So why are we being sued?" Alucard asked, being the only one who wasn't in some sort of panic over the news.

"Take a look at these pictures..." Simon muttered before handing Alucard said photos. One was a picture with a tree that had fallen over onto a Lamborghini, another was a picture of a house that was missing an entire portion of the top floor, and the worst was one with a little girl in a wheelchair, leg stubs bandaged up, flipping off the camera. A footnote at the bottom said 'Screw you, Soma...".

"That poor little girl can't walk anymore because of you!" Simon shouted at Soma, who was slowly inching himself over to the door. It was obvious Simon felt bad for the child, but the fact that the girl was even allowed to make such gestures at a cameraman made Nathan not feel as bad as he should have.

"That poor car...aww!" Jonathan cried before falling to the ground on his behind. He began sucking his thumb while Charlotte patted him on the head saying 'It's okay, Jonathan, it wasn't YOUR car...' though that last bit seemed to make him cry even louder.

Nathan grabbed the letter and looked at it for himself, a bit curious as to how any of this came about. The letter read as follows;

'Dear C.B.P.C.,

This letter is to inform you that multiple parties are suing you for damages to their property and selves. The 'Soma's Lawncare and Removal Services' were also conducted without license or any legal approval whatsoever. The city has deemed this business to be fraudulent and overall dangerous. The court date is one week from the first of next month, and should Soma or a representative not be present at the hearing, the entire organization will be found guilty of destruction of personal property as well as endangerment and bringing injury to a minor.

I await you all in court, Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth' Nathan groaned when he read the last bit. He, nor anyone other than Soma, had anything to do with this scheme.

"So how are we gonna pay this off?" Trevor asked, Simon was still too busy beating the hell out of Soma to answer, so Alucard was the one to shed light on what would be done.

"Oh, we're not paying. Soma is." He stated bluntly. Soma managed to break free long enough to gasp at what the vice president just said.

"B-but how am I going to pay for that? You guys gotta help me out on this one!" He begged, Alucard simply turned his back on him before speaking to the rest of the club.

"All in favor of leaving Soma to deal with this himself?" He asked.

"Aye!" Everyone responded, holding their right hands up.

"Opposed?" Alucard asked, and Nathan could have sworn he heard Soma's spirits drop when no one said anything, even Jonathan was shaking his head as if to say 'hell no'.

"The ayes have it, Soma; you deal with this. Get a legitimate job, win the lottery, whatever. Just don't ask us for the funds." Simon grunted before turning back to the rest of the mail.

"There is another letter from someone named Reinhart77...this one seems to be directed towards you, Nathan." Nathan shuddered, after seeing what just happened to Soma, he was a little afraid of any mail being directed towards him.

"Reinhart77 asks how come there wasn't a Hugh mode in Circle of the Moon?" 'Oh thank God...' Nathan thought to himself.

"Well that's an easy-" Nathan began but was interrupted by someone barging into the meeting room by kicking the door down.

"I'll tell you why!" Hugh Baldwin suddenly emerged from the smoke, while Alucard muttered something under his breath while shaking his head.

"It's because this little bitch gets all the special treatment from my father!" He shouted while Nathan backed away ever so slowly.

"Who is this guy?" Charlotte asked Nathan, pulling him over and whispering her question into his ear. Nathan began to whisper in her ear afterwards.

"Think of him as a step-brother of mine. After my parents died their friend, Morris Baldwin, took me in and raised me alongside his son, this guy. We're more rivals than brothers though. He's probably still mad that I got the hunter whip and he didn't." Was his response. Hugh went wide eyed when he saw the interaction between them.

"And now this little punks got a girlfriend?" Cue the mad blushing and the Charlotte pushing Nathan.

"Oh this is BULLSHIT! First I don't get my own mode, and now this crap!" Hugh shouted. Nathan sighed before speaking in a disturbingly calm voice.

"Look, Hugh, the reason you didn't get your own mode is because you're basically like every other black haired, long haired swordsman out there, either cocky and arrogant, or quiet and arrogant. The key word is arrogant here." In two alternate realities, Yuri Lowell from Tales of Vesperia and Karel from fire emblem sneezed simultaneously.

"I'm ARROGANT? I oughta-"

"HUGH!" Morris Baldwin suddenly came into the room with his booming voice.

'How is everyone getting in here?' Simon thought to himself, but didn't say anything.

"D-dad? Uh, I was just..."

"Boy, just get out in this hallway!" Morris shouted at his son, with his belt in his hand. Hugh and Nathan gulped before Hugh walked outside, then speeding up his pace when he walked past his father.

"Don't try to walk fast! You're gonna get it either way so might as well just get it over with." Morris shouted, and once out of everyone's field of vision a loud cracking noise could be heard.

"Didn't. I. Tell. You. To. Stop. Acting. Like. A. Little. Bitch." Morris said rhythmically while his belt made contact with Hugh's behind. While this was going on, everyone in the meeting room winced, except for Nathan, who was stuffing toilet paper into the seat of his pants.

"What are you doing? This isn't your fault! Listen, I think they're leaving." Leon asked, and it was true, the sounds of Hugh crying and Morris reprimanding him were growing faint. Nathan blushed when he realized this and sat back down into his seat, toilet paper still in there.

"I thought I was next!" He said before shrinking down into his chair. Everyone else either sighed or laughed before Simon spoke again.

"It has come to my attention that there is little to no security in here, we need to renovate." Alucard was the first to say something to that.

"And repair what has been damaged." Pointing to the door, and the window which Richter previously tried to jump through.

"Before anyone asks; I have the number for the company my father calls whenever Castlevania needs rebuilding." he added, while everyone simultaneously thought; 'So THAT'S how it keeps coming back!'

"Hello, Netherworld Construction? No this is his son...yes, it's happened again. No not the whole thing, just some simple repairs and maybe a security system this time. You're running a special?...Elevators?...Very well." Alucard closed his cell phone before speaking to everyone.

"They will be here momentarily, I am going to have elevators installed so that we don't have to go through the clock tower every time we need to get here." Wait for it...wait for it...

"HALLELUJAH!" Just about everyone shouted before a few of them began to dance. Shanoa and Richter were doing the waltz; Soma, Jonathan, Nathan, and Charlotte were doing that Russian kick dance you see on cartoons (Sorry, I have no idea what it's called); Juste was break dancing while Maria, Leon, Julius and Trevor shouted 'Go! Go! Go!'. Even Simon could not contain his joy as he hugged Alucard with all of his might, nearly suffocating him. Yes, they hated the clock tower and any other area of the castle like it THAT much.

Before everyone sat down a portal opened up. Everyone stared as a red-headed demon girl stepped out with a bunch of penguin like things.

"Netherworld Construction! I'm the one in charge here, you can just call me beauty queen Etna!" She squealed before turning her attention to Alucard.

"So this doesn't look that bad this time, too bad I still have to charge full price." Alucard groaned when he heard this. While this was going on, Charlotte picked up one of the penguins.

"Aww! Look how cute!" She shouted, with the penguin panicked.

"P-put me down, Dood!" It shouted. Charlotte looked confused, but still held on.

"Um, I would put him down right about now, sweetheart." Etna warned, stepping back. Alucard, somehow knowing what was about to happen, did the same.

"Dood! I have work to do!" The penguin shouted before Charlotte finally lost her grip on it. The penguin jumped towards Jonathan, and before he could do anything, it blew up as soon as it hit him. Jonathan stood there with a dumb look on his face before falling over.

"Prinnies explode when you throw them, by the way, I'll be needing workman's compensation for that just now." Etna said happily, holding out her hand towards Alucard. He groaned before replying.

"...Yes, I assume that...prinny...will need the extra money." he said as he wrote another check and placing it in Etna's hand.

"Oh? Not for him, for me! I could have sworn I felt my heart skip a beat just now!" She said happily, while Alucard just facepalmed. While this was going on the doors and windows were being fixed, as well as elevators being installed by the little prinnies. While Charlotte was crying a little for hurting such a cute little thing and Jonathan was trying to regain consciousness, Soma got an evil grin on his face.

"Hey, Richter..." He said, picking up an unsuspecting prinny.

"Yeah?"

"Think fast!" Soma shouted as he threw the prinny at Richter. Just like before, it exploded as soon as it hit him. Richter, not saying anything, picked up another nearby prinny and tossed it at Soma. Soma ducked out of the way and the flying prinny landed in the space between Maria and Shanoa. The two girls glared evilly at the two guys, then found prinnies of their own. Jonathan, having just recovered from his run in with the explosion, had just one thing to say.

"PRINNY WAR!" He shouted as he threw one of the poor defenseless birds at Leon. Pretty soon there were prinnies running for their lives, and the ones that didn't get away were being thrown around the room. Nathan and Simon, who decided to loosen up just this one time, built a fort out of some rubble and tossed prinnies over trench warfare style.

"RUN FOR IT DOOD!"

"I gotcha now, that's for earlier, Charlotte!"

"Get back here, Richter!"

"I said I was sorry, Shanoa!" Everyone was acting ridiculous, except for Alucard. While this was going on he felt like he wanted to cry. For every time there was an explosion, he wrote another check and put it in Etna's hands. Etna, obviously, had no problem with this. And so this continued for the rest of the day, eventually Alucard kicked everyone out so that the construction could get done and he wouldn't go broke
(Much to Etna's chagrin).

"Man, that was kind of fun..." Nathan laughed.

"No kidding! I'm surprised we got away with that for as long as we did!" Leon replied, trying to fix his hair.

"It's almost worth having to redecorate the place next time." Juste added, actually laughing for once. The three were soon joined by Charlotte, Jonathan and Shanoa, who were also near falling over from the day's events. The only one who wasn't in high spirits was Soma, Simon reminded him of his upcoming trial after the little game they all played, which killed his mood.

"Maybe Mina will get me off of the hook...I really don't wanna ask her though...I'm supposed to be providing for her, not the other way around!" He sniffled before going on ahead. Nathan and Jonathan looked at each other before falling over in laughter.


LordAce: And so another day in the life of our favorite characters comes to a close.

Nathan: Alucard was PISSED, dood that was mean.

LordAce: Did you just say 'Dood?'

Nathan: It's catchy!

LordAce: Yes it is, anyway that was our first three reviews, if yours was not answered this week I'll get to it next week no problem. I go in order. Thanks go out to Foretoldlegends, No name, and Reinhart77 (You reviewed my last story! Glad you're enjoying this one too! XD) for leaving reviews and thanks to everyone who is reading this silly thing so far.

Nathan: We seriously had way too much fun today.

LordAce: On a side note, did you ever get the toilet paper out of your pants?

Nathan: I'm keeping it in there just in case, the belt is NOT to be taken lightly!

LordAce: True enough.