Finally loaded a second chapter. This is so far away from my original idea for this chapter but I decided to just go with it.

Standard disclaimers apply!


As soon as the small party of exorcists and finders arrived back at the Order after a mission already being dubbed as a miracle, they were whisked to interrogation.

Timothy and Marie were quickly found to be useless in the investigation. Certainly, neither of them had yet fully recovered from their injuries. Neither of them possessed the ability to remain awake for their share of the questioning. Eventually they were sent to the head nurse, who had some choice words to say about the delay in their medical treatment.

The finders faired much worse. They were the only witnesses to the dramatic revival of the lost General despite not really understanding what they had seen.

"His blood just became her," did not quite convince the hierarchy that this turn of events was untainted by dark magic, or something just as bad.

"The blood just seemed to gain its own life-force," was equally scorned. The unfortunate two were given a crash course in dodgy science experiments, and after the truth serum was finally successfully administered (those scientists really need to invest in a labelling system) they were officially free to go, but were kept in quarantine until the end of the investigation. The head nurse was called in to treat them for several strange disorders, cat ears and pig tails to be specific. She had quite an opinion about that.

It was the last three who caused the investigators the most issues.

Lenalee was so scared of them that she clammed up and disappeared into an impenetrable little world where she did not acknowledge the presence of anyone else. Even Komui went largely unnoticed and responded by not leaving her side, Komulin XII standing guard outside her room. There was havoc wrecked on a daily basis, but no-one could bring themselves to destroy the giant robot.

Kanda was being treated like the scientific experiment that he was. Strapped to a table in a laboratory somewhere underneath headquarters he was being poked and prodded by emotionless doctors in white coats. They drew blood time after time and ran test after test on the samples. Somewhere Mugen was being examined as well, an investigation that was turning up no results at all.

He was questioned frequently as well, but even the best interrogator could not coax anything out of him that was not in his official report anyway.

However, it was the general herself who caused the most mayhem. Alma was very adept at escaping her confines and the CROW who watched her. She was frequently found in the kitchen, apparently attempting to try every dish from every country.

She appeared in Komui's office, lecturing everyone about how a cluttered working space meant a cluttered heart and promptly led a cleaning and filing party. She even managed to trick the CROW into helping when they finally tracked her down.

She was reported at every headquarters, simply appearing in the grounds, adding her two cents and disappearing again. She was even spotted checking out both of the headquarters that had been destroyed, tutting and shaking her head as she examined the rubble.

She found her way onto several missions and finder investigations. She taught Miranda a dance that involved flame throwing and was so successful at it that the timid woman emotionally announced it to be the only thing she could do well. She also managed to teach Krory how to play blackjack and left promising to teach him poker one day, leaving him to an emotional outburst.

Everywhere she went people fell in love with her open and bubbly personality. Stories of her friendliness spread like wildfire, and legends of her bravery made her a hero in the eyes of all. All, except those who were tracking her who were starting to really hate this woman.

Eventually Kanda also broke through his restraints and evaded capture merely to get his soba. Apparently the bread and soup he had been getting was not up to scratch and Kanda without his soba was a scary thing indeed.

"YUU!" His name was yelled out as soon as he stepped foot in the cafeteria. The missing General was leaning out of the serving window waving a ladle crazily.

He glared at her and marched over. "Do not call me that!" He hissed.

"Why not? It's your name." She dismissed him and went back to her soup. Kanda frowned at it suspiciously.

"What's that?" he asked.

"Soup," Alma served him out some which Kanda very gingerly tasted.

"It's bland, and there are strange lumps in it," he told her, sounding extremely annoyed.

"It is chicken," she responded. "Chicken and water and some white stuff. I may have misplaced the recipe, that's all I can remember."

"Get out of the kitchen!" Kanda ordered sternly. No way was he having her near his soba!

"That is no way to talk to a lady!" A finder stepped up to her defence. Before Kanda could turn and bite his head off, Alma sighed dramatically and waved her ladle again splattering them all.

"One day I will cook you a good meal Yuu, and you will be happy."

"Your place is NOT in the kitchen," Kanda snapped.

"I have a place?" Alma acted cute, opening her eyes excitedly and dropping her head to her shoulder.

"Not in the world of the living," came the cold reply.

There was a stunned silence for a moment. Then Alma sighed, "That is very cold. True, but cold."

"That was absolutely cruel, you bastard!" The finder from before was absolutely outraged. "I will teach you some manners!"

Kanda glanced around him. Finders surrounded him on all sides, cracking their knuckles threateningly. Many of them had been looking forwards to punching him for years.

Alma squeezed through the serving window and stood next to him protectively.

"Oh please dear finder," she begged. "I would not like you to get hurt!"

"There is no way we would let a woman's honour be so coldly crushed, Miss."

"Oh, that is so sweet." Alma turned and hugged Kanda. "Yuu, isn't that sweet? They think you would hurt my honour!"

He shrugged her off with a che.

The line of finders paused briefly at this confusing gesture.

"I was wondering before, miss," one of them said. "How do you know Kanda?"

"Well," she stopped to think of her answer. Kanda clenched his jaw and looked away from everyone.

"We used to be lovers!" came the loud and happy response.

When the CROW appeared in pursuit of their two escapees moments later, they encountered many finders frozen as still as statues and several more who had fainted. There was no sign of the ones they sought, however.


Da-da! Future chapters will have more about Lenalee. Hopefully a new chapter of the actual manga goes up before I post again though! Fingers crossed, touch wood!

Thanks for reading