Disclaimer: in prologue.

Chapter 1

"Waaaa!"

Something banged nearby, its lock clicking. Then a pair of new slippers shuffled close… closer…

"Waaaa!"

Someone with angry heartbeat of a certain Ms. Green, CEO, never-ever married, drummed on his door.

"Mr. Fitzroy, quit the noise this second!"

Mr. Fitzroy rocked the source of the offending noise, God knows for what time in a row. Oh, how much he wished to…

"Waaaa!"

Only this particular wish, however genuine, was beyond his reach. Henry sighed.

"Ms. Green, I do apologise, but my child needs to eat."

"Then feed it and shut it for the night!" His neighbour practically screeched at the door. "Some of us are not bohemian good-for-nothings, thus getting up early in the morning – every morning, young man, and therefore trying to sleep right about now!"

He couldn't blame her, really, and yet… This night and the night before were taking their toll on him.

Henry Fitzroy, murderous and unshaven, marched to the door, the wailing baby in arms. First, he'll open up, and then he'll shut somebody up just as well… Somebody that he actually could force to do his bidding.

"You did not hear a sound. You find your artistic neighbour and his family extremely charming. You shall return to your apartment now and sleep there until your alarm clock wakes you. Vicki, there you are, come in!"

PI stepped from the lift and around the dreamy-looking woman in expensive hair rollers who was about to leave that sweet young man with a beautiful child be anyway. A shame, though… but she had to, so many important things waiting for her, and she needed a lot of sleep to be able to actually do them.

Vicki strode to his chair by the easel, yawning pointedly as she sat.

"So. You're back and… where'd you get the kid, mister?"

"Hold on, please."

Before she could protest, saying that her experience with children was next to zero, and Mike's family holiday feasts did not count, the vampire practically thrust the baby in her arms.

"Henry, I'm not good with…"

The wailing stopped abruptly, and the author of graphic novels grinned at her, wiping a small tear-stained face that was one big smile now.

"You were saying?.."

The babe looked miraculously snug and happy for all the world to see, practically hugging her breasts.

"Oh! Henry…"

And expressed in no uncertain terms a keen interest in more than just hugging.

"Wait a moment, son."

The vampire tinkered with some sort of bottle-warming contraption.

"Here, Mikie. Leave the nice lady's bosom alone and drink up you breakfast."

"What did you call him?" Vicki breathed out as her breasts were forsaken for a silicone nipple. "Or her. I don't know for sure, after all."

Henry smiled at the baby affectionately and set cross-legged on the floor.

"It's a boy, Vicki. Meet my rightful heir, Michael Henry Fitzroy."

"Your what?"

It was a very good thing that the baby's self-proclaimed sire decided to sit in front of her.

For otherwise one Victoria Nelson would have dropped said baby on the hard floor instead of the comparatively soft, if a bit prickly-cheeked vampire.