Disclaimer: I don't own Drakken, Shego, Team Go, Ron, or Kim. Or anyone else you see on t.v.
"Why do you want her driver's license number? How would I even know that information?" Shego shrugged.
"Hey, if she's a villainess, you may want that info. Also, you can look up her record online," Drakken rolled his eyes. He knew Protective Shego was going to visit at some time, but still. He was a grown man; he could look after himself.
He glanced over at his partner.
"What's the website? For curiosity's sake," he said sheepishly. She straightened his navy blue tie.
"Come on, killer," she teased.
Shego had worn a simple yet flattering emerald dress with slits to her knees. Drakken had sprung for a simple black suit and white button-up shirt. They walked into the Bermuda Triangle.
"Do you have a reservation?" The hostess asked a young woman with a knee length black dress. Her long blonde hair was twisted into a complicated bun. She turned as they came in and Drakken saw her doe brown eyes.
"What are you doing here, Golden Arrow?" Shego said in the surprised way when friends meet unexpectedly. They embraced.
"You're not going to be happy," she grumbled. She turned back to the hostess, "Yes. 5 for...Drewbie," Shego raised an eyebrow. Golden Arrow shook her head. The hostess picked up five menus.
"This way, please."
Drakken trailed behind the two women, a little confused. The reservation was for five? But it was only him, Shego, Charlotte, and Artemis.
"You look like Tigress got to you," Shego commented, glancing down as the girl awkwardly wobbled on high heels.
"Oh yeah, but my main concern is keeping you alive. We got two women out for blood tonight; right now Tigress is pitching a royal tiger fit and Miss Mistress is trying to calm both her and herself down enough to make it through dinner," Shego spun to face Drakken.
"You said your Charlotte was not Miss Mistress!" She exclaimed.
"I never said that!" He insisted.
"Here you are," the hostess spread the menus out around the round table. Golden Arrow sat on Shego's right and Drakken sat on her left.
"I don't see what the big deal is," he murmured. Golden Arrow and Shego looked at him disbelievingly.
"She was my worst enemy," Shego said. Drakken furrowed his eyebrow.
"I thought that was the bird guy," they both snorted.
"No, you're thinking of Hego's decided arch enemy. No, my worst enemies are Tigress and then Miss Mistress. They made my life he-"
"They're coming," Golden Arrow said, standing up. Shego followed, and then Drakken.
Drakken's heart swelled as he saw Charlotte. She was in a sleek blue dress with white gloves. She was chiding someone behind her and looked rather upset. She turned and saw him. Her frown turned into a smile.
She moved out of the way and Drakken's eyes widened. She had brought her tigress; he could clearly see the orange and black striped fur, the cattish features, and especially the tail whipping irritably back and forth from underneath the hem of the dress. But she was human-like in almost every other way; she stood on two legs and her shape was primarily humanoid. Her fiery red hair was pulled up like her sister's, but her brown eyes showed no white, darting between Shego and Drakken with an intense hatred. Her black dress was sleeveless and was just long enough to not be considered absolutely inappropriate. She stormed gracefully towards the table in impossibly high heels, a black choker with a crescent moon around her neck. He thought wryly about how it looked like a collar.
"I see you've already met Artemis," Miss Mistress rested her hand on his shoulder. They kissed. A growl ripped from Tigress's throat. Mistress shot her a glare.
"And I see you brought your "tigress"," Drakken teased. Miss Mistress smiled sheepishly.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you the...full truth. But to be fair, you weren't telling me the full truth, either," she gave a meaningful glance at Shego. Shego straightened a little.
"Miss Mistress," she said cautiously. She turned to her.
"Cego, you..." Miss Mistress began, but seemed to be at a loss for words, or was choosing them wisely. She looked Shego up and down a couple of times. The stiff silence wore on and Miss Mistress finally surrendered to the old reliable, "You've grown."
"It has been awhile," Shego emphasized. They stood awkwardly watching each other for a moment.
Drakken glanced between the two women, unsure of how to take their interaction. Was it better than it had been however many years ago when Shego had been a teenaged superheroine, or was it worse now? Past a surface of loathing, he had no idea how they felt towards each other. He had been careful to avoid the tigress's eyes, boring through him.
"This is what you promised to marry?" She hissed.
"Hilary..." Miss Mistress warned. Drakken managed to lift his eyes, not all the way to hers, but he at least made it to her face.
"You must be Hilary," he said. She snorted.
"Wow, he's a bright one. So few people state the obvious nowadays," she held out her hand, "FYI, it's Tigress."
Drakken took her hand and shook it. Her fingers curled, her sharp nails digging into his skin. He winced, but didn't say anything. They dug in harder and a whimper came out of his throat.
"Enough," Miss Mistress said firmly, positioning herself between Tigress and Drakken. Tigress gave a long murdering glare, and then settled for the seat between her mother and sister.
"I'm sorry about Hilary," Miss Mistress immediately apologized, "She's not fond of surprises."
"Looks like Jail Bait brought his little law whore along," Tigress growled. Shego smirked.
"Just wouldn't be a horrible evening without you, would it?" She joked bitterly.
"I could say the same for you."
"I wish you would've just stayed in your little cat cave."
"I wish you were dead."
"I wish Drakken had never fallen in love with Miss Mistress!"
"I wish you had never been born!"
"I don't know about y'all, but I'm starving," Golden Arrow intervened. Tigress and Shego gave each other glares, but turned to the menus.
"What are you going to get, Drew?" Charlotte asked. Drakken gave her a bewildered look.
"You're just going to ignore that?" She looked questioning at him.
"They aren't diving for each others' throats yet. I consider that a major show of cordiality between them," Shego, Tigress, and Golden Arrow all laughed bitterly at this and Miss Mistress smiled. Seemed like a joke he wasn't in on.
There was a stiff silence as they decided what they were going to order. Drakken could clearly see the alliances, divided like two divorcees and their children going into a marriage. Golden Arrow seemed to be between the two sides, friends with Shego yet daughter of Miss Mistress. She carefully watched Shego and Tigress over her menu.
The waitress returned, looking a bit surprised at the table's new occupants. She quickly regained her bearings.
"What would you all like to drink?" She asked.
"Water for me," Golden Arrow said with a smile.
"Ditto," Shego said. She jerked her thumb towards Tigress, "A milk for the kitty," she growled.
"Ignore her," Tigress seethed, "Miller Light," she looked at Drakken as though trying to see his reaction. He was careful, hoping not to show the wrong emotion.
Mistress ordered a water as well, while Drakken ordered a Pepsi. Tigress's eyes did not leave him as they waited for their beverages. Drakken squirmed underneath them like amoeba under a microscope.
"Why are you staring at me?" He asked. She smirked.
"Why not?" A low rumble that sounded almost like a laugh gurgled in her throat, "Does it make you nervous?"
"No," he insisted. Charlotte looked curiously at him, but didn't say anything.
Tigress continued her intimidating stare until the drinks were brought. Her gaze broke long enough to pick up the glass and take a sip.
"So, Cego, do you see your brothers often?" Charlotte asked, avoiding eye contact. Tigress gave a degrading snort.
"Oh yeah, they have reunion missions periodically, right?" A sick smile crept onto her lips. Shego grit her teeth.
"Twice, and that was after three years of being separated. It's only because they're too pathetic to stand up against those who are trying to make a comeback," she looked pointedly at Tigress.
"Then why do you continue to wear your old uniform?"
"Why not? I don't know if you've noticed, but suits of this durability are pretty hard to come by, and rather expensive," Shego flexed her fingers as though feeling uncomfortable without gloves over them. Charlotte looked dubiously at Shego, and decided not to press the subject.
The waitress came back and they all placed their orders. Drakken felt like he had made a huge mistake as he caught Tigress's eye again.
"Prime rib," she stated, holding Drakken's gaze. That sickening smile came onto her face, "Don't bother cooking it. I like my meat raw," Drakken's stomach dropped as a scream rose in his throat. He stifled it, but couldn't stop his shaking hands.
Charlotte rested her hand on top of his.
"Are you all right?" She asked. He gave a small nod as Tigress's burning eyes refused to even so much as blink.
"Yes," he breathed, "Just a little…cold is all."
"Didn't your mother ever teach you it's not polite to stare?" Shego said icily, noticing the real reason behind Drakken's turmoil. Charlotte fixed her eyes on Shego with a stony glare. Shego shrank back as she realized her blunder, "Oops, sorry. Knee-jerk statement."
The evening was filled with a smorgasbord of awkward, tense, and terrifying moments. Drakken had never seen Charlotte act so resentful towards anyone. Shego may not have been a role model citizen, but he was sure that she had never done anything to deserve the acidic glances and occasional passive-aggressive remarks. She had never acted anywhere near this mean to anyone in front of him, and even he could tell Shego was about one sentence away from being shot by Miss Mistress. Tigress was much more outgoing of her loathing; she fed more off of his fear and Shego's hatred of her than her straight-off-the-cow dinner. Shego grit her teeth, clenched her fists, and endured the rude comments from Tigress like a student who couldn't afford to get into trouble one more time and the school bully knew it. Golden Arrow tried to alleviate the tension, making jokes if the conversation (as it undoubtedly did) turned towards the not-too-distant past. She attempted to divert attention from the rivalry, calm everyone down, defend Shego and kept on Tigress about "not scaring the blue fiancé away".
She had quickly become one of his favorite people.
Finally, after the check was fought over and paid for by Charlotte (pure manliness mocking fodder for Tigress), they headed outside. At least the night was beautiful, Drakken thought, seeing no other silver lining. Charlotte gave him an exhausted smile.
"Well, it appears that mountain has been climbed. The awkward first meeting," she rubbed his shoulder, "I'm sure Tigress will warm up to you once you get to know her," …he seriously doubted that.
"Like how you will warm up to Shego?" He asked. She bit her lip.
"Yes, I suppose I must," her tone was borderline bitter. She kissed him on the cheek, "Shall we discuss Phase 2?"
"Phase 2?" Drakken asked. She glanced away.
"Moving in together."
"Oh. Well I'm a bit old-fashioned…"
"As am I, but I believe we should test this," he smirked.
"You mean all coexist without trying to kill each other?"
"Precisely."
"There's one," Golden Arrow murmured as Tigress walked out the door, looking completely at ease. She glanced innocently at Golden Arrow's probing eyes.
"What?"
"You know exactly "what". Where's Shego?"
"What am I, her keeper?" Tigress shrugged, "I went into the bathroom after her, but I didn't see her come out."
There was a pause and then Drakken let out a low whimper.
"You killed her, didn't you?" He said mournfully. Golden Arrow shook her head.
"Not even Tigress could kill and stash a body that fast," she said, trying to be reassuring. Tigress frowned, as though put off at the lack of faith in her execution skills.
The door flew open a second time and Shego stormed out, noticeably soaked. Her hair was especially wet, looking like a mop as she flipped it out of her face.
"How juvenile was that?! Seriously, like middle school, elementary maybe?!" She screeched. Tigress snickered.
"Aw, come on, Shego. You're just mad I snuck up on you like that," she purred.
"You knocked open my stall door and shoved my head in the toilet!" Tigress's playful expression suddenly turned very seriously.
"I'm just getting warmed up," she growled.
Drakken exchanged glances with Miss Mistress. They wanted to put these two in the same lair? With weapons and opportunities galore? Then again, if they were getting married, it was only a matter of time.
"When shall we move in?" He inquired.
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