A/N: Hi everyone! Hope your all well.

So not a long chapter but I felt a need to post as it has been a long time, so this could be totally rubbish! I'm still a bit confused of the time line of season 3, so apologizes for any wrong placed story lines. I'm hoping to update again soon and some of the other things I have been writting. Thank you so much for continuing to read.

Thank you for the nomination for the Highclere Awards. It's so nice to know people are reading but even nicer to know people like what I write.

Thanks for reading and happy christmas!


March 1920

Out of the corner of her eye she watched her daughter stare blankly past Henry and into the crowded, noisy saloon at Downton. They didn't have money to keep throwing dinner parties but they had to keep up appearances and besides Edith still had to find a husband. One that wasn't over ten years older than her, she noted with some misplaced bitterness. With a sad sigh she also noted it was indeed Anthony that Edith was staring at and to her surprise Anthony was glancing over his shoulder back at her. A sort of mist over his eyes. Surely they couldn't still be thinking about what happened at the garden party, could they? That was over four years ago. Casting her eyes back at the important guest in front of her she threw a polite smile and nod in his direction. Although pleasant and charming, conversation was not his strong point, still Edith should be making an effort instead of wasting her time going after a man who was not suitable. She wanted all of her girls to be happy and for the most part they were it was just getting them to see what would make them happy. They could have such silly ideas. Tom was not her first choice as a son-in-law but it almost made sense now for them to be together. As much sense as it could be.

"Do excuse me."

"Certainly."

Cora had to restrain herself from reaching out and pulling Edith back beside her but it was too late and she had left. Walking over to Anthony she guessed, her view blocked slightly from a rather tall man but then she saw them talking. Henry had not noticed the women's growing boredom nor did he care for he knew in this strange, unfamiliar new world money meant more than ever before. New money was even more exciting so it baffled him as to why Edith did not want to stay. She would not have been his first choice but he did not have much choice these days. Second choice, even third choice was better than no choice at all.

"I am so terribly sorry; Edith can be a bit shy."

"Yes indeed. One did notice."

He said rather sarcastically but not enough for Cora to notice as he threw a glance over his shoulder at Edith happily chatting to a man old enough to be her father. Strange, he had concluded rather quickly before looking back at his host. Would she make the conversation now or would he be passed back to Robert? His thoughts were confirmed rather quickly as Robert was soon at their side. He felt rather uncomfortable about it all. He thought it would only be women that were interested in his new money. He had underestimated how much it would please their fathers too.


Edith had been unsure how to make Anthony aware of her presence. So she had touched his shoulder, lightly at first unsure how he would react but if anything he had seemed pleased to see her. That had taken her by surprise but had only doubled the deep excitement in her stomach, the flutter of her heart. Taking a deep breath she finally looked up at him. Both were lost for a moment as their eyes finally met, Anthony feeling increasingly hot under her gaze. She broke the contact looking back at the guests in the saloon all flustered. It was those moments that she knew she shouldn't...couldn't believe him when he said he was too old for her. Did he feel it too?

"How is the driving coming along?"

"Very well, thank you. I haven't been able to get out in a while. Ever since Bran...Tom left we've been lacking a mechanic. I can't seem to figure out what the problem is...with the motor I mean." I know full well what the matter is with us.

"They are complicated things I'm afraid. Sometimes I wonder if it would be easier to go back to horse and cart."

She looked up at him quickly trying to catch his reaction. The pain in his eyes was well hidden but she could see it, she could see all of it. He was still feeling far too old and far too upset about his arm. It was understandable in a way but what she didn't understand was why he felt that needed to keep them apart. Would it really be all that bad? She had decided not to give up on him but he was making it difficult. He was distancing himself from her, increasingly so and would hardly come to dinner at Downtown anymore. Feeling rather down she let her shoulders drop wondering what to say. What could she say?

Due to the bright lights and fire burning near them Anthony could see her face clearly. It seemed happy but he sensed something wasn't right. He hated feeling so close to her, sensing these things, it was starting to tear him up. He had cursed himself for making conversation. It wasn't fair to toy with her, to toy with his feelings either. He always had to feel something more to her and even now when she was surrounded by other possible suitors, her parents carefully watching over her she was still so very beautiful to him. Please be patient with me Edith, please feel the way I do. He was so terribly conflicted it hurt; he wanted to let her go but somehow she would always come to back to him. Even not physically she would never be far from his thoughts.

"Anthony would you mind accompanying me to the mechanic? One day in the week perhaps?" She said an idea coming to her, her heart not feeling so low anymore.

"Oh Edith I don't know if..."

"If you're busy of course I understand but although we are now in 1920 I feel they would take me more seriously if you were there."

Yes, they would think I am your father. The words stuck in his throat and he was unable to say anything at all as the noise dipped and conversation came to a lull suddenly. Was it that everyone had run out of things to say or was it just because he was with her? He looked at her closer now. He had always liked her long hair, she always did have it arranged different to her sisters but her new shorter hair cut suited her even better. It summed her up completely. He thought taking another long look at her pleading face knowing it was a plan for them to spend time together. He really wouldn't mind but what that haircut said was another sign to him. It was a sign that she was young and modern and he was an old man longing for the horse and cart age. Does she know why I push her away so far? Does she know it's a cover for my uselessness?

"Are you very busy Anthony?" She said quickly losing hope flashing him the best smile she could manage.

"Not nearly as I should be. I know a mechanic in Ripon. Do you think the car will make it there?"

"I hope so."

I hope not. I hope it will take a long time fix, I hope that time with me will make you wake up. She thought quietly as he sipped his drink, distracting himself. Don't mess this up again Edith. She warned herself trying not let her excitement come across as they stood side by side in silence. Edith wanted to make conversation but she was trying hard to concentrate. She didn't want to scare him away, she had done it once before. She didn't care if he didn't want her, she would always belong to him, and she would always want him. Gazing lovingly at him again she was unaware that her mother was watching her with a very different idea about her future. Please trust me long enough to make this work, please Edith trust your family. He will never make you happy.